My body is hungry for sex! It's been a year!! Please help me!!
Q. Hi. I haven't had sex for a year now, as of this week. It's quite a depressing anniversary, and one that I have tried to keep off my mind, but haven't been able to. I really feel like I need sex again now, for the good of my manhood. I have made out ...
A. 29 May 2008: Masturbate frequently. I'm guessing you're already doing that, but that's unfortunately about all you can do.
Try to find a steady girlfriend that you really like and connect with. This has two major benefits: lots of regular sex, and with a g... (read in full...)
What are your opinions or funny stories about 69ing?
Q. i would like to hear your opinions about 69ing with somebody. like if you like it or not? or if you have any funny or interesting stories about it!!! please write them if you have any!!!...
A. 29 May 2008: My opinion is that you are too young to be doing it ;)
It can be great, or bad, depending on who it is with and how good your relationship is. Just like sex in general. ... (read in full...)
I think I might have over reacted, what should I do?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend (of 11 months) yesterday. I went through his cell phone (something that I really hate and very unlike me) and found msgs to other girls. I found the same type of msgs in January and confronted him about it. He said he ...
A. 29 May 2008: Without knowing the content of the messages it is hard to judge, but it sounds like they are very incriminating. What I'm saying below assumes that they are clearly sexual messages, or very flirtatious.
If so, don't call him, and don't wait for... (read in full...)
I think I am fat, but my friends tell me I'm skinny!
Q. I think I am fat,my friends tell me that I am skiny but I think the opposite. I am 52kg and 170cm....
A. 22 May 2008: According to standard body mass indicators ...
For your age and weight and height you are in the lowest 20% of body-weight (meaning you are in the thinnest 20% of the population), and are 'normal' weight, but any lighter and you would be underwei... (read in full...)
Sex with 67 men in the past, is that high or low in your opinion?
Q. My wife had sex with 67 men before me...is that number too high or low for a woman?...
A. 21 May 2008: The largest set of surveys done on this subject is by Durex. In 2005 they surveyed 317,000 people and found that the global average of sexual partners is 9. There was quite a lot of regional variation, the USA was 11 and the Netherlands was 7, and ... (read in full...)
Id like to date someone but the guys I meet only seem after one thing!
Q. hi,im 23yrs old i have been single for about four years and have been happy going out with my single mates but lately ive missed being with someone but i have found it very hard to meet genuine men the men i meet down town come up to me and talk to ...
A. 21 May 2008: "What makes you want to go out with one women and just sleep with others?"
Most men have a considerably lower standard for women they'd sleep with compared to ones they'd want a relationship with. Most of us would sleep with most women to be hones... (read in full...)
Sex with 67 men in the past, is that high or low in your opinion?
Q. My wife had sex with 67 men before me...is that number too high or low for a woman?...
A. 19 May 2008: Amusing limerick, and no I'm not cross about any responses. The question was admittedly very in-artfully phrased but, well, I just wonder whether he appreciated the responses. My guess would be no.... (read in full...)
Sex with 67 men in the past, is that high or low in your opinion?
Q. My wife had sex with 67 men before me...is that number too high or low for a woman?...
A. 19 May 2008: I'm a bit saddened to see how your question has been answered here. Dear cupid is a place where people should be understood and given help, not ridiculed and teased. To some of the aunts answering here: please grow up a bit and show more dignity.
... (read in full...)
Can you help with my personal sex problems please?
Q. I am 14. I'm straight, and i am a virgin. I like a 15 year old who is not a virgin. I like him a lot, but we haven't met in person yet. Well we have but a year ago. Now we just talk on the phone. I don't have any boobs, and i don't know if he will ...
A. 7 April 2008: I don't agree that at your age you shouldn't be thinking about sex. It's hard to think about anything else at that age. But, you shouldn't be having sex until at least 16. There are many reasons for this, but the most important is that sex opens up ... (read in full...)
Should I Confront The Man Who Betrayed Me and Stole My Sexuality For His Own Pleasure?
Q. I am an evangelist in my local church. My husband and I have been sep for 10 yrs. He contracted HIV while were sep, so I know we won't be getting back together. Ran into a past love from about 30 yrs ago (this happened 4 yrs ago). We first dated ...
A. 7 April 2008: Tough call. God would perhaps expect you to forgive your sick husband for his transgressions, to live with him and nurse him. Certainly wishing him harm is not ok.
Personally I doubt God wants you to be unhappy. As long as what you do is done wit... (read in full...)
Is it a sin to be gay?
Q. I'm not too sure how many people will answer this question but I'm going to give it a try .... does it say anywhere in the bible that it's a sin to be gay? if it does what exactly does it say ?? I think I'm bi and that's why I'm asking .... ...
A. 6 April 2008: No it's not a sin to be gay.
There are several passages in the bible that homophobic people like to point at and call 'proof that being gay is a sin'. I suggest next time someone does that you look up those passages and read them. I've read the... (read in full...)
Come on girls help me out on this one!
Q. Why do women do this? i've had it happen three times now and its pissing me off. You meet a woman and she agrees to go out with you. She says she wants to take it slowly, you talk get to know each other, exchange thoughts and generally get on like ...
A. 5 April 2008: Haha. Yup. I know what you mean. Not sure too many women will admit to that though. Here is one possible answer (based mainly on evolutionary psychology):
Women are attracted to two types of men:
- Caring provider type guys who will stay faithf... (read in full...)
Why do men not call after the first few dates?
Q. Why do men, after a few dates and telling you how nice you are, suddenly never call you again??...
A. 5 April 2008: Because they don't want a relationship with you. Men will perhaps go on a few dates hoping to have sex with someone they don't want something longer with, but they're not looking for anything more. So after a few dates, sex or no sex, the phone ... (read in full...)
After we broke up she "learned a few new things"! Having a hard time getting over the "she waited for me like a saint"! What do you think?
Q. I'm a 24yr old male who has been with a girl since the 5th grade from puppy love to high school sweethearts. This girl has always loved me ever since I can remember but I have always taken her for granted. Not because I don't care for her but ...
A. 4 April 2008: Read back what you wrote...
"I have always taken her for granted. Not because I don't care for her but because I wanted to try other girls and not be committed. I'm a good looking guy so I have gotten away with being a jerk..."
What right do... (read in full...)
I was given a pill at a party, it knocked me out and I woke up in my underwear with a guy in bed beside me, I have absolutely no idea what happened not my boyfriend has dumped me, it's all soooo unfair.
Q. Hi, I am head over heels in love with my exbf as of 11 february 07 who i had been with for over a yr... around June last year I went to a guy friends house with all my friends and bfs friends and I was drinking and hanging out and having a good tim...
A. 4 April 2008: How truly horrible. You have my sympathy.
My suggestion would be:
- Tell your ex everything. Absolutely every last detail. Show him what you wrote here even. You have done NOTHING wrong. Hopefully he'll see that.
- The guy who did this to ... (read in full...)
Why am I seeing so many underage people asking for advice about sex?....
Q. Why am i seeing so many underage people asking for advice about sex?....do they not have responsible parents anymore?....I know there is a lot more pressure to perform nowadays, unlike when i was a teenager, but it still dosent explain it to me, do ...
A. 4 April 2008: Sex education. Schools think parents should do it (or have their hands tied). Parents think schools should do it. So it gets left to TV to do it.
Sex education. The teach vaginas, penises, sperm, ovaries, fertilization, and sometimes contrace... (read in full...)
Should my boyfriend pay rent when the mortgage is in my name?
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years will be moving in with me soon and I'm not sure if he should pay 'rent' because the mortgage in my name only. I don't like the idea of him paying 'rent' but it would be nice it he contributed some. Is that fair? I'm not ...
A. 3 April 2008: Umm, let me think about this for a minute.
Actually, it only took a second.... YES!
Live together, split the costs associated with living together. Down the middle, 50 / 50.... (read in full...)
Is it normal for Europeon men to have a wandering eye?
Q. Everytime I go out with my boyfriend (he is Europeon and I am american) he keeps oopgling other women and has an extreme wandering eye. I have never had this problem before with previous boyfriends. His previous girlfriends have all been Europeon. ...
A. 3 April 2008: I'm European, and have lived in various places in Europe. The short answer to your question is 'no'. Europeans are no different from Americans in this regard.
In other words, it's your boyfriend.
I suggest you tell him that you find it upsettin... (read in full...)
Why aren't you men wooing us any more?
Q. Hi Me and my friend (female, both around 30) were talking about courtship. We both are a little old-fashioned und we both agreed that it should be the man pursusing the woman of his heart. But why are men so passive? We came to the coclusion th...
A. 3 April 2008: Good question. I think there are several factors, here's my opinion. I should warn you in advance that you may find some of it a bit offensive. Please know that that is not my intention, but I am being hones about my interpretation:
1. Emancipa... (read in full...)
He finds pubic hair a turn off...he even shaves and waxes his whole body!!!
Q. erm, my question is about pubic hair :s lol. well basicly me and my boyfriend have been together for a while but he has recenty told me that he finds hair a massive turn off. ive known for ajis that he doesnt like hair, facial hair etc! hes very ver...
A. 3 April 2008: He waxes once a week? Wow, that's a lot of effort. I know its trendy right now to be shaved, but that's taking things a bit far. It makes me think he may be channelling a some obsessive-compulsive tendencies in that direction.
In the mean tim... (read in full...)
How can I get her past loves out of my mind?
Q. I'm having problems with my girlfriend not being a virgin while I am. I've read the past is the past stuff. I know it's me she wants to be with forever and that it's best to get over people she's been with in the past and it's starting to help.. but ...
A. 3 April 2008: You're probably feeling that way because you're worried that you won't 'measure up' (literally and metaphorically) to her past lovers. A way to get past this is to be the best boyfriend to her that you can be. If you do that, you'll be much better ... (read in full...)
I am a nice girl why can't guys be nice with me?
Q. I'm 16 and would like to be in a relationship. I'm intelligent, athletic, caring, and friendly. I would take care of any guy even if I didn't like him, because it's the right thing to do. My looks aren't great (they are okay only if my skin is ...
A. 3 April 2008: "I would take care of any guy even if I didn't like him, because it's the right thing to do."
Are you sure that's the right thing to do? That sounds like a recipe for being taken advantage of to me.
The trick to keeping a guy interested is to... (read in full...)
My wife wants to close a 27 yr old wound she rec'd from her ex-husband!!
Q. My wife of 10 years has informed me that four days ago she made contact with her first husband. They were married for 12 days when they went to sleep in the same bed as his best friend. Sometime during the night she woke up and thought she was kiss...
A. 2 April 2008: It's rarely a mistake to be too honest, despite the cliches.
However I would advise you to take another shot at being really honest with someone ... yourself.
You have convinced yourself you MUST do this. Despite the obvious pain and damage ... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Over half a million visitors in March!
Q. I'm pleased to say that according to Google Analytics, March 08 was the busiest month ever for Dear Cupid! We had 519,747 unique visitors (i.e. people!) visit the site from 1st March 08 to 31st March 08 inclusive. Over HALF A MILLION people.... ...
A. 2 April 2008: That's amazing. It really must be one of the busiest (if not the busiest) sites of its type. The volunteer aunts have a lot to do with it, but also I think your eye for very user-friendly page design makes a huge difference. Too many sites think ... (read in full...)
He never pleases me in bed when I ask to be pleased, should I surrender to his phantasy, a threesome, because I love him?....
Q. My boyfriend really wants a threesome with another girl, hes always said before me and him got together about how its his fantasy and i do want to give it to him because i love him and want to give him what he wants. But im too scared to, i worry ...
A. 2 April 2008: Wow, he sounds awful to be honest. Really selfish. Why are you even with him?
Think about this logically for a second. You do stuff for him to please him. Then you ask for him to please you in return. He refuses, with no excuse other than he 'does... (read in full...)
Ok I have made a huge mistake......but is it better I don't tell the truth?
Q. ok i have a made a huge mistake..there is this real cute guy in college and everyone thinks that we look awsome together and i know that this guy too lets call him mark checks me out but hasnr spoken to me as yet..even i did not try talkin to him ...
A. 2 April 2008: "well the prob is its 2 late for me to tell the truth"
It's never too late to tell the truth.... (read in full...)
My wife wants to close a 27 yr old wound she rec'd from her ex-husband!!
Q. My wife of 10 years has informed me that four days ago she made contact with her first husband. They were married for 12 days when they went to sleep in the same bed as his best friend. Sometime during the night she woke up and thought she was kiss...
A. 2 April 2008: I agree with the other aunts.
As for closing an old wound... that's nonsense. This happened 27 years ago, that wound is nothing but an old scar now. To go back down there will make the whole series of events much more vivid and real, and have exa... (read in full...)
He wants to practice picking up women so that he can make a career out teaching other guys, I'm not happy with this!
Q. Hello, I've been exclusively dating a nice guy for almost 8 months now. We've had good times together and he is always there for me when I need him. The thing is, before he met me, he was very promiscuous. (I don't have a lot of dating experien...
A. 2 April 2008: How to attract women? Perhaps instead he should we working on 'how to keep a girlfriend'? Which is much more important than the first thing, and he clearly needs practice at it.
What he's asking for is way out of line. Way way way out of line. If... (read in full...)
I offered him oral on our third date, after that he did not utter a word to me! Your opinions about his change in behaviour?
Q. Hi...I've met a guy..we've been out three times... I gave him oral(my first)...and after he came he was all weird. he didn't say a word to me. He just took me home without kissing me godbye. This happened three days ago and I haven't heard from him ...
A. 31 March 2008: Some guys have a tweak where a girl has to be very 'pure' to be desirable. So when they have sex they quickly go off her. Given how immediate his reaction was this could be what happened. It's like they have to think of you as virginal to want to ... (read in full...)
My wife's sexual past....it's not the 'normal' jealous story!
Q. Have been married 7 years....happily. Wife mentioned in conversation 3 months ago about a threesome she had once. ( 20 years ago). I explained I don't want to know thing like that as it would do my head in. She mentioned it again. I went in...
A. 31 March 2008: As long as it's clear now that she shouldn't bring it up again, then hopefully things will be ok. It seems it should be clear after your discussions / arguments / fights?
As for why she mentioned it there could be several reasons:
- She has bee... (read in full...)
Married one year and I've never had sex because I lose my erection whenever I attempt intercourse! Where can I get treatment in the Netherlands or anywhwere else?
Q. i am married 1 year before still i dont have sex with my wife. becoase when i try to insert my pene into my wifes virgina. my peney was going down(become strongless) so i am so sad that i cant have a sex with my wife. i thing it was related mental ...
A. 29 March 2008: It is most likely a psychological issue, since you can get an erection, but you lose it when trying to have sex with your wife.
I suggest you speak to your doctor (huisarts) and ask them to recommend a therapist to you who has experience with sex... (read in full...)
What is the best way to get a girls number??
Q. I'm 15 and i like this girl thats sits next to me in Spanish class. I talk to her a little more every time i see her. So i want to get her number but i don't really know how. What is the best and easiest way to get a girls number? ...
A. 29 March 2008: Ask her what her favourite number is, and why.
Then tell her what yours is. Keep your reason short.
Then ask her for her number.... (read in full...)
Should I ask her to let me watch porn to get me aroused when we have sex?
Q. Been in a relationship with a girl for 5 years now... she's my second long-term girlfriend. Before I met her I was into porn, and lad mags, and generally just liked looking at women all the time. After I ended my relationship with my first long term ...
A. 28 March 2008: You've come to the conclusion that your girlfriend doesn't arouse you, so you need porn to get aroused. But you should consider another possibility: that using porn is causing you to not be aroused by your girlfriend.
A lot of research has been... (read in full...)
I would not have married her, had I known of her wild sexual past! What now?
Q. What do you do when you find out your wife has had a wild sexual past and you didnt know about it and if you had known about it, you would not have even asked her to marry you?...
A. 28 March 2008: I'd ask you to re-read a lot of answers below, because much of this has been covered. But i'll also try to re-iterate based on your questions.
"1) The fact she lied to me about her past, I asked her because I wanted to know for a reason, people a... (read in full...)
Why am I attracted to men who are sooo different to me, and not attracted to men who share my values?
Q. I dont get myself. I always go out with and are attracted to guys who end up treating me badly or who are sooo different to me that we just dont work together. But when a guy come along who is very similar I just dont like him more then a friend. ...
A. 28 March 2008: LonelyTwo has given you a really good answer, and I agree.
Most commonly when a girl falls for guys that treat her badly it's because she has low self esteem. Whilst on the surface she feels that these guys are attractive, and the nice guys are... (read in full...)
How do I stop a guy moving in on my girlfriend??
Q. I'm currently in a very happy relationship. My girlfriend and I are very much in love and I trust her completely. We live in the same dorm at college, and we have lots of mutual friends. Unfortunately, one of my friends from the dorm has recently ...
A. 28 March 2008: Sometimes it is a man's job to fend off others who are chasing his woman. You are going to have to face your fear and be confrontational.
Yes your gf can be 'cold' towards him, but this is where you need to step up and deal with this head-on.... (read in full...)
What's a 'mars bar' party?
Q. Whats a mars bar party, someone mentioned it the the other day but I'm not sure what it is? ...
A. 27 March 2008: It just occurred to me that if you combine a Mars Bar party with a Lipstick party (aka Rainbow party), you get a Stripy Lollipop party (that's a Lifesafers Popsicle party for the Americans) ... (read in full...)
I really like my best friend's boyfriend, we've had threesomes, but he's feeling trapped because she's pregnant!
Q. I really like my best friends boyfriend. I have liked him for about 2 years now and never told anyone about it. We all had a few 3somes together at some point, and me and the boyfriend work together which makes me like him even more. My mate has ...
A. 27 March 2008: Be careful that you apply the same judgements to everyone here. You accuse her of 'sleeping around', and yet he also is 'sleeping around'... with you! Why should one be worse than the other? Simple answer: they're each as bad as each other, as much ... (read in full...)
What's a 'mars bar' party?
Q. Whats a mars bar party, someone mentioned it the the other day but I'm not sure what it is? ...
A. 26 March 2008: It's a myth...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mars_Bar_party
... (read in full...)
I wanted to give the players a taste of their own medicine so I'm dating both, is it wrong?
Q. ok im 13 but soon to be 14..i have been talking to thing guy and he's 15 but will be 16 in july..we dated once but i broke up with him because he cheated on me but he now wants me back..we've been talking about sex lately an hes Not a virgin but i ...
A. 25 March 2008: You think you're giving them some of their own medicine? It sure doesn't sound like it. You think you're playing the players, and they're playing you. Which is exactly how they want it to be... These two guys are close friends. Of course they'll b... (read in full...)
Is anal that bad?
Q. hey well i have erm quite an embarrassing question, my boyfriend and i have recently decided to become sexually active. we have decided to wait till next month at least when im 16, as he is 19 and we love each other too much to cause any trouble. we ...
A. 21 March 2008: I recommend you stick to 'straight sex' for a while. By that i mean oral and vaginal sex.
Why? Well, sex comes with very complex and new emotions, that take time to learn how to cope with. Pushing the envelope with things like anal and using a ... (read in full...)
I would not have married her, had I known of her wild sexual past! What now?
Q. What do you do when you find out your wife has had a wild sexual past and you didnt know about it and if you had known about it, you would not have even asked her to marry you?...
A. 21 March 2008: That's a tough situation. The fact that you asked and were mislead, plus the occasional reminder through bumping in to a former lover, is a really difficult combination to deal with.
Troubledtoomuch is right focussing on understanding why she didn... (read in full...)
I would not have married her, had I known of her wild sexual past! What now?
Q. What do you do when you find out your wife has had a wild sexual past and you didnt know about it and if you had known about it, you would not have even asked her to marry you?...
A. 20 March 2008: Troubledtoouch has given some great advice too, I'd like to add a few things based on it.
In terms of how much detail you ask for, that is something you can, like he says, dig into. It's one of those difficult situations where you end up in one o... (read in full...)
I would not have married her, had I known of her wild sexual past! What now?
Q. What do you do when you find out your wife has had a wild sexual past and you didnt know about it and if you had known about it, you would not have even asked her to marry you?...
A. 20 March 2008: Thank you Daniel. You raise a good point also: that leaving is an option. That really should be a last resort. If this happens to a couple very early on in a relationship then breaking up should be considered, but if you have been together for ... (read in full...)
I would not have married her, had I known of her wild sexual past! What now?
Q. What do you do when you find out your wife has had a wild sexual past and you didnt know about it and if you had known about it, you would not have even asked her to marry you?...
A. 20 March 2008: First of all, don't expect to get much sympathy from women on this issue. The intense emotions men can sometimes experience in your situation are, in my experience, distinctly 'male' and not something most women will be able to strongly empathise ... (read in full...)
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