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... Send *iamine a private message | | | *iamine's profile:* I'm brutally honest, sometimes to the point of offence, I never hide under the secrecy of anonymous. I'm pro-porn and many people don't like this. I'm also non judgemental of different relationships and lifestyles. I'm pro-men and pro-women, I believe strongly in equality and happiness for both sexes, that's my definition of Feminism. And I'm an atheist, there aint no God in my world.
Mental Health Help (Depression, anxiety, bi-polar) Advice and support and mood charting: - http://www.patientslikeme.com
Helplines for UK visitors.
*The Samaritans.... http://www.samaritans.org/ UK: 08457 90 90 90 ROI: 1850 60 90 90
*Rape Crisis Centres... http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/index.php Tel:0808 802 9999
*Childline... http://www.childline.org.uk/Pages/Home.aspx Tel: 0800 1111 (free to call and totally confidential)
*NHS... http://www.nhs.uk/Pages/HomePage.aspx
Type in your postcode to find the location of your nearest family planning clinic. Contraception is available free, and emergency contraception (taken within 72 hours, but sooner is better, 24 hours is best) can help prevent pregnancy if you have unprotected sex.
NHS Direct Telephone Hotline - 111
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Should I continue to connect with my estranged daughter, or stop trying?
Q. Dear Cupid I have a daughter who does not want to know me. She was just the most rebellious daughter you could ever imagine from 12 onwards. I tried counseling. But it never worked, she would not attend. I was a very young parent and she is my on...
A. 13 May 2011: Yes, I thought you might be upset, and that wasn't my intention. My head was thinking about what your daughter may have been thinking and feeling and the reason why she walked away. It's hard for us to look in the mirror and look at ourselves ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be a creep -- is this all there is?
Q. My bf of 2 years seems to be a creep. I was looking for a movie to watch on my laptop and stumbled into Google documents for the first time ever. I saw everything that my bf looked up on the laptop for the last 5 years +. I saw all kinds of ...
A. 7 May 2011: People will have missed your follow up, which is regrettable, because what you say is still alarming. Petting a cat outside the bathroom door? Some invisible person going through your daughters laundry? To me these are just excuses and classic ... (read in full...)
I cannot stop this horrible feeling that he only wants me for sex.
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for just over a year and we both come from a strict religion where dating and sex outside of marriage is forbidden. My siblings and his know that we are seeing each other and so do our friends but I haven't met his and ...
A. 5 May 2011: Because you come from strict backgrounds I think his behavior is disrespectful. He continously pushes you for sex, but never takes you out. The fact that you are writing to us should tell you something is wrong.
Yes, many men and women from str... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to be a creep -- is this all there is?
Q. My bf of 2 years seems to be a creep. I was looking for a movie to watch on my laptop and stumbled into Google documents for the first time ever. I saw everything that my bf looked up on the laptop for the last 5 years +. I saw all kinds of ...
A. 5 May 2011: I'll join the queue.....
The guy is a creep, and I'm scared for your daughter.. please throw him out and put locks on your door.... (read in full...)
I did a favor for a friend and now my daughter may be pregnant. How do I handle this and not have my husband blame me?
Q. 8 months ago one of my dear friends came to me upset. saying that her new husband and her 18 yr old son were not getting along. Her son (M) and her husband were always fighting so M moved out and was staying with friends. Since M moved in with his...
A. 5 May 2011: Forget about your husbands reactions, that is the least of your problems. The main issue is your daughter is stupid enough to have sex without protection and this young man has betrayed you. They are the ones who are having sex, not you. If your ... (read in full...)
My sister-in-law is too clingy towards my husband. What do I do?
Q. My question might sound weird, but the situtation that Im in is making me more and more anxious. So me and my husband have been married for a little over two years now. We have two beautiful children(ages 3 and 1)Our marriage itself has been ama...
A. 27 April 2011: Why can't a married father laugh and joke? Did he vow to always look unhappy and serious?
Unfortunately that statement suggests why he's comfortable in his sister's company and has to hide his feelings when your around
You say she's breaking u... (read in full...)
I think he made upa girlfriend because he's afraid of what is happening between us
Q. How do you help ease the anxiety of a man who's afraid? For the background story see here: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/should-i-move-back-to-be-with-my.html So a month and a half ago, I told this guy Steve that I had feelings for him. St...
A. 27 April 2011: "I know the ball's in his court now, but I'm wondering if there's anything concrete I can do to make him feel safer around me and more able to move forward at whatever pace he needs to?"
I read your original post http://w... (read in full...)
How can I determine if my two cousins have the same feelings as I have for them?
Q. ok I have these two cousins who I'm attracted to and I think they might think the same. But I am not sure. One is 29 and the other one is 21.I'm 28. I am really close to both of them. I mean we can talk about anything. Relationship problems...
A. 27 April 2011: If you like both of them, then neither of them is right, and since they are your cousins, I don't think kissing them both is suitable. They are your family, I don't think you should use them for a casual affair.
I'm not even sure that it's leg... (read in full...)
He doesn't want a relationship but I've fallen for him!
Q. Hi, ok, so I'll try keep this very brief. I'm 30, met a guy in a bar last month, his 27. Gorgeous, funny and yum. We get on great. However he doesn't do relationships and made it pretty clear... But we started seeing each other. Were both pretty ...
A. 27 April 2011: "I feel it's because I'm not good enough for him, his young, got great job, good looking, got amazing flat, money, funny. I'm old, single, never had long term relationship just been made redundant from shity job, bout to move into my grandmothers ... (read in full...)
I think my Dad's having an affair
Q. i think my dads having an affair. My parents have been married for 15 years,they argue reguarly and iv been thinking for the last 2 years that they were going to split up but they havent.The other day my dad was out and he'd left his phone charging...
A. 27 April 2011: No matter what it is, it's really none of your business. You really don't know what's going on. Marriages are complicated things, for all you know, your mother knows everything and is happy with the things that are happening. You really don't ... (read in full...)
Birth control pill supply runs out when I'm aboard, how do I get more pills?
Q. I've started the pill, and from my calendar that I am using to find out when I run out of my first three month supply, I am going to run out on the second day of my holiday abroad. How do I get more pills? Do I have to have a check up to get more ...
A. 26 April 2011: Clarification... age of consent is 16 in the UK but 18 in the USA and other parts of the world.... this may have caused some confusion in the responses given. ... (read in full...)
In my opinion, fathers need to draw a line between being a parent or a club buddy-what do you guys think?
Q. Why is it that some men are unable to accept getting older and to be parents instead of best pals to their children.Don't you believe there is nothing stranger than seeing fathers in their 30's to 50's out clubbing with their sons? I am not saying ...
A. 26 April 2011: Sigh.. all us oldies better stay at home then... The young have declared we must sit in front of the TV until their ready for us to die so they can have all our money. I've a question for you? Why don't you want us old people to have fun. What ... (read in full...)
He says he finds me boring during sex! Help!
Q. hello... when i have sex with my partner it lasts a good amount of time(anything between 10 mins to an hour.. which i think is OK) i think he gets pleasure from it and so do i but 9 times out of 10 after sex he always makes sarcastic remarks like ...
A. 26 April 2011: This is not a good relationship. Guys who love you don't talk like this. Guys like this don't try to make you feel like shit.
I don't want to give you sex tips because no matter what you do this guy will still insult you. He doesn't treat yo... (read in full...)
B/f says he loves me and then runs back to his spouse!
Q. I am in a gay relationship and love the guy I am dating. The problem is he tells me that he loves me and cares for me and wants to spend the rest of his life with he, then he runs back to his cheating ,thefting husband. I love him with all my heart ...
A. 26 April 2011: Guys married, your the bit on the side.. What don't you understand. The other guy gets used, and the guy at home get the cuddles, sex, money and commitment.
Find someone single, it hurts to wait around on a man who is busy screwing someone ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my cousin!!!
Q. I have a real problem here , I think I love my cousin, he is totally fit and everything , I think about him all the tome and I don't stop , I remember even actually having a sexual dream about us two having sex and it keeps getting worse and worse ...
A. 26 April 2011: UK law... it is legal to marry your cousin, so it is legal to date them or have sex with them. In some cultures within the UK (South Asia) marriage amongst cousins are preferred to marriage outside of the family. Even the royals have been known ... (read in full...)
I check on partner's ex and he broke up with her 10 years ago!
Q. I am obsessed with my partners ex. I just constantly check her facebook page and look at pictures of her and her husband. My partner and her broke up almost 10 years ago! I think I am going mad, can someone please give me some tips to stop!...
A. 26 April 2011: Sounds like obsession to me, your thoughts are taking over and you not thinking properly. Check the Dear Cupid site for "retrograde jealousy", it's a terrible condition, similar in nature to Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) You need to bl... (read in full...)
How do you prove your serious in a relationship?
Q. How do you prove your serious in a relationship?...
A. 26 April 2011: If she is young like you, a piece of jewelry will do it, make sure it costs a little bit, so she will know she's special. Then tell her you love her and she's the only woman for you. Tell your folks and friends that she's officially your ... (read in full...)
My teacher kissed me! I don't know what to do or how to handle this!
Q. I KNOW ITS KIND OF LONG BUT PLEASE I NEED ANSWERS. Ok well i get along great with my maths teacher. hes funny, easygoing and a great teacher! We always have a laugh in class as well as getting the work done, but one day some of my friends started ...
A. 26 April 2011: Go and tell the headmaster. This guy is a pervert and shouldn't be teaching young girls. What would your parents say? Proper teachers don't act like this. This man is a sick creep, he gets excited by groping young girls who don't have enough ... (read in full...)
After being sexually active for twelve years, I STILL can't climax during sex. I've tried so many things, please help!
Q. I have been sexually active for twelve years, and I still cannot orgasm during sex. I can make myself climax six or seven times a day if I wanted. Occasionally, I can climax with oral stimulation. But never have I climaxed during sex. I have read ...
A. 26 April 2011: Hard question. Firstly, there are many women who cannot orgasm at all and many more who cannot orgasm through penetrative orgasm. This could be the case with you, and that may have to be something you accept. Because you find it difficult ... (read in full...)
If we're both fifteen...what happens if we want to have a baby?
Q. What iF You're 15 And You And Your Boyfriend Want To Have A Baby?!?...
A. 26 April 2011: You become a burden to everyone around you. Not only will they have to feed and clothe you, but they'll have to look after your kid too, since your too young to work and don't even have enough money to buy yourself toilet paper.
You'll bring up... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's grandmother wants him to date/marry a lighter woman and I feel hurt by this when I cared so much for her health. Now, I don't know what to think...Please help me
Q. So i have been in this great relationship with this guy for almost a year. We get along great. My family likes him and I think his family loves me. he is a great guy and we both love each other very dearly. I can actually imagine a future alongside ...
A. 26 April 2011: She's a racist, so what? You're black, I'm black, the sky is blue and the sun is hot. That's how some things go. You can't make all people nice, you can't walk on water and you don't have wings to fly. You have to learn to accept the things you ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to ask a married man out for coffee?
Q. Hi everybody. First time here. Could use your advice. I am friendly with a married man. Our sons go to karate together. We talk a lot when we see each other twice a week. He always finds me to talk and seems to enjoy my company. I enjoy his compan...
A. 26 April 2011: Oh, I see the follow up... So your not interested in coffee and friendship. Nope, don't think that's a good idea. Having sex with someone who you know is already sleeping with his wife. It'll probably embarrass your son as well if anyone ever ... (read in full...)
His daughter is ruining our relationship!
Q. I been in a relationship for 4 years he's 59 and I'm 41. I have no kids, he has 2 boys and one of his girls is 35 years old and the other 32. The one girl is a pain; she's married to an army guy and has a daughter. Her boyfriend pays her electric ...
A. 25 April 2011: You don't have any kids, so therefore you see the daughter as intrusive. Unfortunately for many parents their kids are important and they want to make them happy. Because you don't see her visit, you assume they are not close, but your parents ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to ask a married man out for coffee?
Q. Hi everybody. First time here. Could use your advice. I am friendly with a married man. Our sons go to karate together. We talk a lot when we see each other twice a week. He always finds me to talk and seems to enjoy my company. I enjoy his compan...
A. 25 April 2011: "Ask out", why, what for? He has coffee at home if he's thirsty and a wife if he needs a friend. If you want to buy him coffee, fine, do that when you meet up normally. It's strange that you are asking. I got male friends who are married, and... (read in full...)
Should I continue to connect with my estranged daughter, or stop trying?
Q. Dear Cupid I have a daughter who does not want to know me. She was just the most rebellious daughter you could ever imagine from 12 onwards. I tried counseling. But it never worked, she would not attend. I was a very young parent and she is my on...
A. 23 April 2011: Certain things you say rub me up raw, and i can see why you have a problem with your daughter. Most kids get funny when they are 12, it's the hormones, they really can't help it. You must have had similar experiences of rebellion because you talk... (read in full...)
Do you think girls who go with guys to a strip club are trashy?
Q. Guys, do you think it's trashy for a girl to accompany a group of guys to the strip club? I think it's a certain type of girl who is willing to go along on this "adventure," and I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the ...
A. 20 April 2011: Sigh, your right, and your more polite than me.
Try to do what you want to do, and not consider what men think. Men like all kinds of things, because all men are different. As you can see from the answers here, people have all different types of... (read in full...)
Do you think girls who go with guys to a strip club are trashy?
Q. Guys, do you think it's trashy for a girl to accompany a group of guys to the strip club? I think it's a certain type of girl who is willing to go along on this "adventure," and I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the ...
A. 19 April 2011: "I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the mom of your own children one day"
I think you are very judgmental.... trying to be a stuck up prude who is more holy than holy isn't anyone's idea of a fun wife...
Men lik... (read in full...)
Ladies can you tell me why you hate porn or why you think other women hate it?
Q. Why do women hate porn so much? I agree that when it becomes an addiction, their is a problem. However why, when a guy watches porn only occasionally, and has sex at least once every 2 days? I mean, it's not an addiction but only to spend time. ...
A. 19 April 2011: "She gave me excuses like, "You think the porn actress is better than me", "I'm not enough, that you need to watch for other women naked", etcetera."
Babes, these are not excuses, this is how she really feels and what goes on in her mind. If you ... (read in full...)
Want him to think I'm a virgin
Q. {Moderator note: two questions combined} Okay i just wanna know , i lost my virginity about two year ago since then i havent had sex ,it was against my religion and culture to do that .Im due to get marrid in 2 months will i be tight i know i wont b...
A. 17 April 2011: Your in the UK... tell him your not a virgin, he can call of the wedding if he wants to, but there is nothing else he can do.
You had sex, it was your choice, you knew what your religion and culture expected, but that didn't stop you. Because ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my partner he needs to dedicate more time with me and our child because I'm starting to feel left out?
Q. So my partner/father of my child has currently enrolled in school so he's obviously been busy. I'm glad he's doing something good for him but he seems to be busy or tired most of the time. I feel like he's slowly getting distant ..and just focusing...
A. 15 April 2011: Focusing on himself. So he goes to school because it's entertaining and is a bundle of laughs. He's having so much fun that he's tired to death... You on the other hand never focus on yourself, and your not here demanding that your husband stay at ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid being monogamous will make me feel sexually repressed
Q. I am in a relationship with the best possible guy i could be matched for. We are now also doing bible study and im connecting to myself spiritually. But im noticing my fear of my need of wanting to be intimately involved with other men. I used to be ...
A. 15 April 2011: Funny that Abby, I know what you mean about erotic massage. I did that to guys when I was in my teens, it stopped them asking for sex and allowed me to keep my clothes on. Yep, it's very addictive to give pleasure to someone. You need to creat... (read in full...)
Found Dad's history of porn on computer. Should I confront him or tell my mum?
Q. my mum and dad have been married for about 18 years and recently things have been a bit awkward. they have been arguing quite a bit and my mum even told me a few weeks ago that she was getting fed up of my dad because i was upset and said that i was ...
A. 14 April 2011: Best to leave it alone... you know nothing about your parents marriage. What would you do if you found you mum's vibrator, whip and chains, run and tell daddy or pretend your deaf, dumb and blind. You have no idea what goes on inside the bedro... (read in full...)
My girlfriend liked sex with her ex better because he was "larger". How do a I deal with this?
Q. I know a lot of people on this board are tired of the never-ending penis size questions, but please bear with me. The answers to most questions are "it's how you use it" and "women don't care about size", etc. But, what if you're in a situation ...
A. 14 April 2011: How do you deal with a situation in which you know your gf actually does like a larger penis better? Sigh.. it's how you move it.. we are not lying about that. Sure, for some women big penis that slams in, that's good. But you can't do t... (read in full...)
I'm afraid being monogamous will make me feel sexually repressed
Q. I am in a relationship with the best possible guy i could be matched for. We are now also doing bible study and im connecting to myself spiritually. But im noticing my fear of my need of wanting to be intimately involved with other men. I used to be ...
A. 14 April 2011: I think you need to speak to either the priest or better still a counselor. You have mixed up sex, love, affection and doing good. Many women do this. I'm not religious, but you don't help men through sex, only prostitutes are in the position to ... (read in full...)
Do girls like crossdressers?
Q. This question is for the girls. How do you feel about a guy who likes to crossdress. Would you date a crossdresser? Would you be involved helping him achieve a feminine lifestyle and look?...
A. 14 April 2011: Mishmash, crossdressers are straight, they like women. Sigh.. just thought about it some more. Crossdressers are often very "strong men". In the UK we have a very famous topless model, Jordan. Her last husband was a crossdresser and... (read in full...)
Husband's emotional affair may turn physical. What do I do?
Q. My husband of 15 years has been masturbating to a picture of someone he met out of state. I found the text message of her in a bikini and discovered that he has been writing to her for over a year. He told her that he imagines that it is her he has ...
A. 14 April 2011: I wouldn't divorce my husband because he's talking to some woman. He already choose you when he said he would never leave. Yes it hurts... so what will you do? Divorce him, she will love that and I'm sure she'll welcome him with open arms.
... (read in full...)
Despite his words, boyfriend leaves me feeling sad and neglected
Q. I've been in this relationship for almost 4 months now. During the first 3 months everything was great, he was very attentive to my needs, never really misses my calls, gives me sweet messages all the time during the day, etc, you know the drill. ...
A. 14 April 2011: He's on anti-depressant medication... I think your priorities wrong. The man is ill and your worried about yourself and your needs. Why don't you spend a little time thinking about what he may need. Why don't you spend a little time on finding ... (read in full...)
Does he have to dump me because he's depressed?
Q. So Ive been in a LDR for almost 3 years now. He dumped me last night...he's been experiencing some rather harsh depression lately and lost all feeling and emotion, not a care in the world. Hes seeing a doctor on monday but last night he came to...
A. 14 April 2011: Get rid of the word "fault".... if your thinking like that then no you can't stay with him. It's not his fault he is sick, he is not doing this to punish you. You are doing nothing wrong even though sometimes he makes you feel worthless.
All o... (read in full...)
I don't see my boyfriend as much and I'm horny all the time!
Q. i dont know whats wrong with me, i dont know if it beacuse i dont do much or work much but im horny all the time. i masturbate about 5 or 6 times a day but straight after feel horny again. i use to see my bf most day and use to have sex about 4-6 ...
A. 14 April 2011: "what i can do to stop feeling horny and wanting to masturbate all the time?
Get a job.
Your bored, and you have nothing to do. Sex and masturbation is often used at times like this to distract you from the fact that life is passing you by a... (read in full...)
My b/f cannot orgasm during sex
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for a few months and we're blissfully happy together; we're in love. There's just one problem. My wonderful guy cannot orgasm when we have sex. It's something he has never done even with previous girlfriends, so I am ...
A. 14 April 2011: mmm... there is a condition, (Pironism, pyronism... sorry just can't remember how to spell the name) that causes delayed ejection in men. It is therefore important that he sees a doctor who can properly diagnosis this. You are not a doctor and ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants a lover without the headaches
Q. suspect partner is cheating he says hes not put all the signs are there i am older than him and we have lived together for 12 yrs. then he moved to his own place and i have my own place but we were still seeing each other as a couple til last year ...
A. 14 April 2011: What signs have you noticed? You haven't given a lot of detail for us to answer this question properly. How much younger is he? How old are you?
You lived together for 12years and then he moved out. Why? You were a couple last year, but now ... (read in full...)
Is he going to cheat? or has he already? and what do I do?
Q. I am lost. What makes a man claim to be happily married when his internet browsing history says otherwise? Our laptop was on his profile tonight as it sometimes is and I get on facebook and other various sites from his profile from time to time. I ...
A. 14 April 2011: What does a mellow mild tempered person do when confronted with the evidence that her husband is thinking about doing another woman?
Good place to start would be to just ask him. Show him the browsing history and ask him calmly for an explanat... (read in full...)
Want to move on, date someone new but am afraid to ask someone out
Q. i'm 24 years old with a 3 week old baby in a shitty apartment writting on an peace of crap labtop. with no job and zero friends due to the fact i lost them all because i was so wrapped up with my ex. who by the way i still love but f*** off when i ...
A. 14 April 2011: Your ex is with someone new, so your feelings don't matter, he's unavailable.
You like this new guy. Hell girl, your not talking about marrying him, your talking about going on a date. It's not that big a deal, just invite him over and get roma... (read in full...)
Do girls like crossdressers?
Q. This question is for the girls. How do you feel about a guy who likes to crossdress. Would you date a crossdresser? Would you be involved helping him achieve a feminine lifestyle and look?...
A. 14 April 2011: mmmm.. Not too keen on it myself, I like strong men.. However, if I love a guy and that's what he needs, it's a small thing to keep him happy.
Relationships should be based on love and compromise. A happy man will make a woman smile, and if he's ... (read in full...)
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