Why should I have to choose between my girlfriend and my mum?
Q. Please help. My girlfriend and i have a young baby, my girlfriend thinks my mum hasn't made enough effort in coming to see us and the baby (which maybe she hasn't but my gf hasn't made her feel welcome lately). Also my mum is depressed at the ...
A. 23 March 2010: By protocol , the DIL should 'kowtow' (bow) before the MIL (The Dowager). This works in most culture.
She should do it out of respect for you and your mother.
Your wife is too strong willed , dominant and controlling .She is the younger one ... (read in full...)
Why should I have to choose between my girlfriend and my mum?
Q. Please help. My girlfriend and i have a young baby, my girlfriend thinks my mum hasn't made enough effort in coming to see us and the baby (which maybe she hasn't but my gf hasn't made her feel welcome lately). Also my mum is depressed at the ...
A. 22 March 2010: Just leave them alone and allow nature to take it's course. You should not precipitate a head on because it might worsen the situation beyond repair.
Pray to God daily for a miracle .Be more patient .... (read in full...)
Should I terminate my pregnancy for my boyfriend?
Q. im just 3 weeks pregnant and its the one thing i want most in the world. im 33 and was beginning to fear it would be too late for me. my partner wants me to terminate, weve discussed children and ive always been under the impression it would happen, ...
A. 13 March 2010: You may disagree but to insult and belittle others is beyond reproach.
Don't judge others, lest you will be judged with the same high standards you judged others.
... (read in full...)
Can a girl's physical imperfections drive guys away?
Q. This is something that bothers me a lot and makes me self-conscious. The thing is, I have an uneven nose. It's different on both sides (one side being better than the other), and from the front you can see that it's asymmetrical; one side of the ...
A. 12 March 2010: If people want to judge you, then your whole body maybe under the microscope ,not only your nose.
I am sure there are many parts of your body which are imperfect.Even the way you dressed or the way you walked cannot escape their eyes.
You can... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong here or is this due to his insecurities?
Q. My boyfriend is very insecure.. we are fighting at the moment because i went to my brothers place for dinner and he said to me "you were probably out with some guy having a quicky" i thought this was disrespectful and said to him i dont want to a...
A. 12 March 2010: You cannot change a man. He is what he is , take it or leave it.
You can try your best and give your best, but all your best will never be enough.
If you like it, you take it home, if you don't like it , you don't buy it.
You are like a ... (read in full...)
Will adding him as a friend on facebook make me seem desperate?
Q. well i have a crush on dis guy and he is there on facebook so you think should i add him?i hope this wont make him feel that i am desperate to talk to him?...
A. 12 March 2010: Do you know him? Just send him a message and another request again.Or you can send an email to him in FB.
If he still does not accept you ,you can forget him because he is the kind that does not accept anyone as friends in FB.
There are som... (read in full...)
Should I terminate my pregnancy for my boyfriend?
Q. im just 3 weeks pregnant and its the one thing i want most in the world. im 33 and was beginning to fear it would be too late for me. my partner wants me to terminate, weve discussed children and ive always been under the impression it would happen, ...
A. 11 March 2010: Glad to hear your wise decision. When the baby comes out, he will change his opinion.
Que! Sera! Sera! What ever will be ,will be !
Children are a blessings from God.... (read in full...)
He wont forgive me after our fight, how can I get over this?
Q. I had 2 arguments with my boyfriend in a row and on a very simple reason. It was his fault that he couldnt return my phone calls since he was with his friends and I scolded him the following day. He kept silent saying nothing and that means he is ...
A. 11 March 2010: Call him out and tell him it is important and talk over dinner, kiss and make up.Everything will be back on track.
... (read in full...)
Why should I have to choose between my girlfriend and my mum?
Q. Please help. My girlfriend and i have a young baby, my girlfriend thinks my mum hasn't made enough effort in coming to see us and the baby (which maybe she hasn't but my gf hasn't made her feel welcome lately). Also my mum is depressed at the ...
A. 11 March 2010: Be cool and don't get angry with your wife and don't do anything stupid or against your wife's will.
Your wife is piqued because your mom did not visit her while she can visit your niece. She felt resentment and her pride wounded.
Give her more... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong here or is this due to his insecurities?
Q. My boyfriend is very insecure.. we are fighting at the moment because i went to my brothers place for dinner and he said to me "you were probably out with some guy having a quicky" i thought this was disrespectful and said to him i dont want to a...
A. 11 March 2010: He is a sauerkraut. WOW! You must be his guardian angel! You are right. He is very insecure, irrational and immature.
He is a challenge to you ,a rough diamond and you want to mould and polish him into a fine and sparkling diamond.
Good lu... (read in full...)
Should I terminate my pregnancy for my boyfriend?
Q. im just 3 weeks pregnant and its the one thing i want most in the world. im 33 and was beginning to fear it would be too late for me. my partner wants me to terminate, weve discussed children and ive always been under the impression it would happen, ...
A. 11 March 2010: Children are the center of your universe. Without them life has got no purpose and meaning.
If without children ,my life would be nothing .
How can a woman find fulfillment and contentment when she was created to bear children and this right i... (read in full...)
He chose another girl over me and I cant seem to let it go
Q. He doesnt want me anymore. I know I've been stupid but I went back begging him to come back. He keeps saying it's impossible and he doesnt want me anymore. I've been depressed, had medical leaves and ive been excused from lectures. It's not like I ...
A. 11 March 2010: "Don't Ever Give up If You Still Want to try,
Don't Ever Wipe Your Tears If You Still Want to cry.
Don't Ever Settle for an Answer If You Still Want to know.
Don't Ever Say You Don't Love Him If You Can't Let Him Go."
Don't go a beggi... (read in full...)
How do I prevent him from wanting to end it?
Q. im 13 me and my bf have been going out for almost 2 months now.i realized dat hes a little horny all the time but is a little shy about feelings. we kiss a lot but i dont think he likes doing it. i feel like he is starting to loose interestt of me. ...
A. 11 March 2010: He did not tell you that he wanted to end it . He could be distant or cold for now or it is winter at his home.
Your perceptions could be wrong. You should not act clingy because it could be a turn off.
Don't chase after him and wait to see ... (read in full...)
Should I talk to him and let him know I'm not mad anymore or just let it go?
Q. I stop talking to this guy that I really like and because I found he was a lier and a player. But still had feelings for him , we used to be really close but I avoid him all the time. Hes leaving high school in a couple of weeks ( i will probably ...
A. 11 March 2010: Let sleeping dogs lie. It would not be good to disturb them.
Since you said you don't care anymore, it does not matter anymore.
If you were to meet again , be civil and carry on as nothing had happened.
If you have forgiven him , you w... (read in full...)
Constant emotional turmoil... how do I control myself?
Q. what happens in a relationship when a man and a woman get upset with each other practically every week? that is happening in my relationship and sometimes it scares me. because i want our special love to be forever. he has been saying to me that he ...
A. 11 March 2010: You may have Multiple Personality Disorder or a newer term ,Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)
A person suffering from Multiple Personality Disorder undergoes change in personality in just a few seconds
I think you should visit a therapis... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to get advice about my marriage from a man I am attracted to?
Q. My husband and I haven't been seeing eye to eye on things recently,which causes us to fuss heatedly. I recently met a man who I can talk to and vent with. We are attracted to each other. Is it wrong to Get his advice?...
A. 11 March 2010: You already have more problems than you can handle and
he is going to add more to your problems .
By going to him , you have created a negative perceptions of yourself.People may not see the way you do about him.It would add more fuel to the ... (read in full...)
Was it wrong to expect to spend quality time together on his first day off in weeks?
Q. Hello. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 months now and we just hit our first rough patch and I was hoping for some advice. For some background information, he's a police officer who works a very hectic schedule and works 4nights a week, including ...
A. 11 March 2010: He is your priority but you are only one of his options.
Don't expect much when you are ranked so low in his priority list.
His heart is too crowded and there isn't much room for you to maneuver.
Maybe , he thought that he got you and he do... (read in full...)
What in the world does his comment mean?
Q. Have been involved with a man now for a little over 5 yrs and care for this man very much. I recently asked him if he was happy with what we have and he said that he was. I then went on to say if you're happy, comfortable, and getting your ne...
A. 11 March 2010: He was stupid in a sense but he is a smart Alex.
Why would he go up another level when he has got everything he wants.
He pretends not to know what you want .If you lead a buffalo to graze on your land , he is smart not to let you put a yoke o... (read in full...)
My relationship just ended but I don't care..?
Q. My relationship of 2 months just ended about an hour ago. For some reason I am not at all upset. I don't know what to make of this. I was trying to make it work up until he decided it just wouldn't, but it was more because I was scared of being ...
A. 11 March 2010: Your perception of him was like that of a pesky rat and you felt relieved and happy that you got rid of this itch.
Since you just started recently with him and there was not much emotional attachments to him, you could not feel anything about it... (read in full...)
Can a girl's physical imperfections drive guys away?
Q. This is something that bothers me a lot and makes me self-conscious. The thing is, I have an uneven nose. It's different on both sides (one side being better than the other), and from the front you can see that it's asymmetrical; one side of the ...
A. 11 March 2010: Most guys eyes will be on your chest and they would seldom notice your nose imperfection, unless it is very pronounced. You yourself even did not notice it until recently .
Those who cares about you ,would not matter and those who matter ,you don... (read in full...)
What should I do about my girlfriend hitting me?
Q. My girlfriend has started hitting me lately when we argue. Any feedback on what I should do is much appreciated. We have been dating for over a year. We rarely fought during the first year. However, recently we have started fighting more. W...
A. 11 March 2010: She has a dominant personality while you are the passive kind. This could be what attracted you to each other as opposites attracts.
It looks like you are just incompatible with each other. Either she has to tone down her erratic behaviou... (read in full...)
I exercise and do sports constantly but can't seem to lose weight!
Q. Hi, Aunties! I'm in a great relationship with one of the best guys in the world. I'm beyond lucky to have him, and I love him very much. At only 16, I know that I'm going to be told I know nothing of love... And that's probably true, but I'm very...
A. 11 March 2010: You need to watch what you put inside your mouth . Perhaps , you may have to cut down those portions and eat less so that your body will burn up those fats. Drink more water instead.
It will take time and you will need to be more patient. Losing 2... (read in full...)
Should I try to make it work with my husband or should I finally leave and start a new life?
Q. I've been married for 4 years, and I have a 3 yr old son with my husband. He is a great, amazing, cute, hardworking man. About a year and half ago i started seeing this other guy, started off as a little adventure, but became very serious, and now ...
A. 11 March 2010: You should work it out with your husband to mend your marriage. Give all your best and if you are still unhappy, you may have to go for the other alternative.
Give him more time and space to deal with the after effects.
You will need to refocus b... (read in full...)
Do you have to take birth control at the same time everyday for it to work?
Q. If you been on Birth control pills and you never skip a day but take it sometime on different times of the days. Does it still works? ...
A. 11 March 2010: Follow the instructions as given and best to take it everyday at the same time.
If you take it at different times, it will still work but what I fear is that you may tend to forget to take it.
Better to develop a regular habit and you will not... (read in full...)
Will adding him as a friend on facebook make me seem desperate?
Q. well i have a crush on dis guy and he is there on facebook so you think should i add him?i hope this wont make him feel that i am desperate to talk to him?...
A. 11 March 2010: Does he knows that you have a crush on him ?
Even if he does, it does not matter. Adding him in your FB is just a normal occurrence. It does not mean that you are desperate. Go on and add him .... (read in full...)
Is this just a crush or have I really fallen in love with a married man?
Q. i like a man who is 10 years my senior. he told me that he always quarrel with his wife . both of us are married with children. when he look at me i try to escape his eyes for fear that i might give myself away. he doesnt know that i like him. so ...
A. 10 March 2010: If you're unfortunate enough to fall in love with a married man, turn and run the other way, just a fast as your legs can carry you.
Use your willpower and your common sense and walk in the opposite direction as quickly as you can.
A marri... (read in full...)
How effective is the pill "microgynon 30" ?
Q. hi guys, just a question about the pill im on.. im on microgynon 30 and i was just wondering how effective it is? when my doctor put me on it, i asked her if my partner and i still need to use condoms, and she said that as long as im taking the pill ...
A. 10 March 2010: The pill is 99.9% safe but like anything it does not come with a guarantee.
To cover the 0.01% , use the condom as a backup and you can also prevent STI's and STD's.
A regular partner could be clean but there is no knowing that he could pick up... (read in full...)
Should I tell my girlfriend that I went to my mum for advice about the sexual abuse in her past?
Q. Hey I met this girl and we became real close, anyway she was sexually abused when she was young by her father, I needed advice about all this and I asked my mum about it, I told her about the sexual abuse. Now I feel real guilty, shoud I tell my ...
A. 10 March 2010: She shared it for your ears only .Now that you have told your mom and if you tell her about it , she will be aghast.
She will start to think that you cannot keep secrets and will not trust you anymore.
If she asked you where you got those ad... (read in full...)
There have been a few small signs of agression towards me, do I walk away or give him one final chance?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been getting on exceptionally well and he is positive about our future together. He has made me so happy and is a loving caring person, i couldnt have asked for more. I cant stress how good this relationship was. HOWEVER, ...
A. 10 March 2010: Stay away from him when he drinks. Avoid him if you can. Some day you may not even get to issue him a final warning. It will be very sad because you did not take precautions.... (read in full...)
He invites his ex round to OUR house to visit and I don't know how to handle it any more...
Q. I have met a wonderful man online in a chat room in October of 2009. We met face to face and hit it of so well we have moved in together and not been apart since. Sounds like a happily ever after story well not quite. His ex girlfriend left him...
A. 10 March 2010: Your ex presence in her house is like a thorn under her feet. If it is not removed, it will gives her pain every time she walks .
She will be reminded of it every time she see's her and you can imagine the emotional pain and mental torture ... (read in full...)
He's great in lots of ways, but he's dull and argumentative too
Q. I have a fiancé whose main points are he doesn't snore, do porn, watch cricket or sports fanatically, tries hard to be attentive, doesn’t womanise or socialise with the boys as he prefers to be with me, doesn’t gamble or waste money, drinks ...
A. 10 March 2010: Familiarity may breed contempt's.
Take a break ! Have a Kit Kat and enjoy life. Look at him from another girl's perspective . Maybe you may see something which you have missed about him.
List his good and bad points and then ponder hard.
... (read in full...)
Why does my husband still want sex from me if we have been separated for 3 years?
Q. why does my husband want sex from me if we have been separated 3 years now and says he wants a divorce? we have 4 beautiful children together and he says he wants a divorce because i cheated on him. i take full responsability for what i've done. we ...
A. 10 March 2010: Sex and love are two different things to a man. He can have sex without love . Sex satisfies hie premedieval urges, his base instincts or his animal urges. He may not love you but he will not decline sex from you if you still appeal to him in a ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my mother and risk my whole family finding out what happened?
Q. Hi there Aunts and Uncles. This is is something that has been playing on my mind for a long time. I'm remaining anonymous due to the topic. I was molested by my cousin as a child. The earliest incident I remember was when I was 4. My cousin was 25...
A. 10 March 2010: I think since you have already forgiven him and got over his abuse, it would not do you any good to relive all those horrid moments of your life.
Those defense lawyers would gruel you mercilessly and cast aspersions on your character.
You wou... (read in full...)
I cant sleep! Does anyone have any advice?
Q. Basically i cant sleep at all. The doctor reckons its aniexty and ive been put on calming pills, which dont work. I could take louds of sleeping pills and still lie awake. Some nights i do sleep. its totally random. But i feel tired but my mind will ...
A. 10 March 2010: You can Google for those tips online and listen to those musical You Tube video's which can make you fall asleep with those monotonous sounds.... (read in full...)
Is it selfish for me to want him in my life?
Q. I have been so troubled lately. My bf and I broke up just over a month ago. We were together for five years, and I am having trouble moving on. I initiated the break because I had not been happy for quite some time. My feelings for him ...
A. 10 March 2010: No one can predict the future . If you don't lose hope, one day in the not too distant future, the possibility of coming back together may be bright.
If you share the same destiny, you will meet again in another place and another time.
Good fr... (read in full...)
Why do people who go through a break up need space from the other person?
Q. My question is why do people who go through a break up need space from the other person? My bf over 1 year broke up w me to "focus on himself" last week. He says he loves and cares for alot but is not ready for a relationship. He says its too soon ...
A. 10 March 2010: When you are in a relationship ,you tend to let others sit in your driver's seat. They feel that they do not have control over their own life or the directions where they would like to go.
There comes a time when he realizes that the course h... (read in full...)
We met while clubbing, but he won't let me club anymore!
Q. My boyfriend has told me that he doesn't want a girlfriend who wants to go clubbing and drink. We have been together for 2 years, we met at a club and for the first 6 months always went clubbing together and we went to every music festival ...
A. 10 March 2010: Try to strike a common ground and if this is impossible ,I don't know how you can get along with each other.
You have too contrasting styles and the chasm is too wide to bridge.
Your different perspective will put a great strain on your ... (read in full...)
He's a control freak, a fault finder and has anger issues... Should I stay in the marriage for the sake of my son?
Q. I've been married for almost 5 years now. We rushed into things and got married right away. I've regretted it almost every day since. He's a control freak, a fault finder, and has some anger issues (but he doesn't hit me). He's never happy. Ever. I ...
A. 10 March 2010:
It is a very difficult decision for those couples who find themselves in this dilemma.Which is better for your kids, to stay together or to divorce?
Put it in another way. Would you be able to raise your kids who would fare better in life if y... (read in full...)
How do I get him to see that we still have a strong relationship, it's just broken???
Q. Hey everyone I need help :( My husband and I have been married for 2 years but have only actually been with each other 5 months out of that due to the army and him being deployed. Our relationship before the army was very strong and healthy but whil...
A. 10 March 2010: The only thing you can do for him is to remain true to him and not start another new relationship ever.
If you honestly and truly love him , you will have to remain single for him until he comes back for you .He may not come back and that is the r... (read in full...)
We met while clubbing, but he won't let me club anymore!
Q. My boyfriend has told me that he doesn't want a girlfriend who wants to go clubbing and drink. We have been together for 2 years, we met at a club and for the first 6 months always went clubbing together and we went to every music festival ...
A. 10 March 2010: It looks like you both have incompatible needs.It is either you choose his way or you go your way or maybe you can find a middle course (compromise) .
When you are single , your friends are very important but when you are in a relation... (read in full...)
What are some precautions I should take when starting a friendship with an older man?
Q. OK,So I was on the bus and I heard two guys speak about America,one was like 30ish and the other was an old man,around 70.They didn't know each other,they were just conversating.Since I have a passion for America,I kindly interrupted them and asked ...
A. 10 March 2010: Appearances can be deceptive. Most rape cases are perpetuated by friends or friendly people or relatives.
There is no way we can read what's inside their mind. The only way is not to be too trusting of any man ,even old men or very young boys.
... (read in full...)
He talks to random girls and lies about porn use. I don't want to be a single mom at 21!
Q. So he has never physically cheated on me that I know of.. But I've caught him talkin to numerous random girls even his ex. We are now engaged and expecting a child.. I've also caught him looking at porn. His arguement is it will never happen again ...
A. 10 March 2010: Before you met him ,he was watching porn and talking or flirting with random girls.
Most men do watch porn in their lifetime .If any man says he has not watched porn in his life, I think either he has never grown up or he lives in the most pri... (read in full...)
He invites his ex round to OUR house to visit and I don't know how to handle it any more...
Q. I have met a wonderful man online in a chat room in October of 2009. We met face to face and hit it of so well we have moved in together and not been apart since. Sounds like a happily ever after story well not quite. His ex girlfriend left him...
A. 10 March 2010: Your home is a sanctity for you and your b/f only . His ex presence would violate the sanctity of your house.
Either he breaks off with his ex or he goes somewhere to meet his ex. Allowing the ex to come to your house is trampling on your rights. ... (read in full...)
Was my cousin trying to have sex with me?
Q. Was my cousin trying to have sex with me? About 4 months ago me and her and the family went to France and stayed in a hostel one night our parents left and there was a friend sleeping on the sofa and my cousin was taking a shower and came out nake...
A. 10 March 2010: She was only teasing you and getting your attentions. She was being playful and nothing more.
Sometimes, the girls have those 'come hither look', but they are not aware of their body signals and how it come across to the opposite sex.
If she ... (read in full...)
She wants time out alone... yet says I'm a fantastic boyfriend! What gives???
Q. hi, I've been with my girlfriend for nearly 2 years now, we only see each other about once a week but she has asked for some time to her self to think! We're very much in love but she has said that she sometimes doesnt find she misses me! I know ...
A. 10 March 2010: Life is too boring and predictable . Complacency could have crept into your relationship . You need to surprise her some and zing up your love life.
The fire is not burning brightly and you need to add more fuel and keep it burning brightly... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant from this?
Q. Last night my boyfriend and I were fooling around and he was rubbing his penis on my vagina. I was on top of him and he continued rubbing until he came. Could I become pregnant from this? Should I take a pregnancy test?? Thankyou...
A. 9 March 2010: Normally when you miss your periods .Sometimes , your period is delayed because of stress.
It depends on the type of test you buy. Most tests recommend testing on the day your period is due,
although you can buy some that can detect the pregn... (read in full...)
Why do I love him so?
Q. My boyfriend and i dated for about a year and i loved him unconditionally infact i still do. In the second month of our relationship i found out that his ex girlfriend was pregnant with his child. He assured me that this happend before we go ...
A. 9 March 2010: He did not love you at all and he has totally lost interest .If he loves you , he would not do those things to you.
He is a cheater and he thinks you cheated too.Cheaters always think that way.
He is not the deserving man for you . Give him u... (read in full...)
What are some precautions I should take when starting a friendship with an older man?
Q. OK,So I was on the bus and I heard two guys speak about America,one was like 30ish and the other was an old man,around 70.They didn't know each other,they were just conversating.Since I have a passion for America,I kindly interrupted them and asked ...
A. 9 March 2010: Never trust strangers or any men and don't give your telephone numbers to people whom you just met.You don't want to get calls from some weirdo's or perverts.
A person may look old and educated but you never know what goes on in their minds.Be... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant from this?
Q. Last night my boyfriend and I were fooling around and he was rubbing his penis on my vagina. I was on top of him and he continued rubbing until he came. Could I become pregnant from this? Should I take a pregnancy test?? Thankyou...
A. 8 March 2010: If you have ejaculated prior to you "pre-ejaculating" then it can pick up sperm that did not leave the urethra, and cause a possible pregnancy, but is not probable.
Now, here's the good news: If the guy pees BEFORE he pre-ejaculates, the acid in ... (read in full...)
He's a control freak, a fault finder and has anger issues... Should I stay in the marriage for the sake of my son?
Q. I've been married for almost 5 years now. We rushed into things and got married right away. I've regretted it almost every day since. He's a control freak, a fault finder, and has some anger issues (but he doesn't hit me). He's never happy. Ever. I ...
A. 8 March 2010: I believe that you should not stay in a marriage when there is no love. Do not stay in an unhappy and loveless marriage because of your children.
It will only harm them more and stunt and warp their childhood developments
You have been mental... (read in full...)
What are some precautions I should take when starting a friendship with an older man?
Q. OK,So I was on the bus and I heard two guys speak about America,one was like 30ish and the other was an old man,around 70.They didn't know each other,they were just conversating.Since I have a passion for America,I kindly interrupted them and asked ...
A. 6 March 2010: Keep your distance and you don't have to go out with him. Give excuses. Talk only when you accidentally meet otherwise don't go out with him. You might give him the wrong signals.... (read in full...)
Why do I love him so?
Q. My boyfriend and i dated for about a year and i loved him unconditionally infact i still do. In the second month of our relationship i found out that his ex girlfriend was pregnant with his child. He assured me that this happend before we go ...
A. 5 March 2010: You have been used and exploited by him and after he found that your usefulness was over, he dumped you .
He was not really in love with you but was only treating you as his meal ticket.
To get over him , try to demonize him and think of all... (read in full...)
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