A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My question is why do people who go through a break up need space from the other person? My bf over 1 year broke up w me to "focus on himself" last week. He says he loves and cares for alot but is not ready for a relationship. He says its too soon after the relationship to see each other, even though he says he wants to hang out and have fun w me still. I really want to see him, but It seems he doesn't want or isn't ready to see me. What do you think??
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (10 March 2010):
 When you are in a relationship ,you tend to let others sit in your driver's seat. They feel that they do not have control over their own life or the directions where they would like to go.
There comes a time when he realizes that the course he is traveling is not to his liking and would like to take back control of his own life.
That is why he needs a break or time up to sort out his own life and decides what he wants to do with it.He wants to experience those carefree days when he was single .
It is like you are into his system over loading and choking him. He needs to purge you off and breathe more easily.
He needs more space and time. He is like a bird ,which has escaped from it's cage and wants to savour those freedom to fly anywhere and to do as it pleases.
In time, the bird may get tired of living in the wild and may prefer to renter his old cage .
If you are fated, then your path will cross again.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 March 2010):
The words 'I love you and care for you but need space' are usually a gentle let down. He cares for you, but he's not the one. And as such he now needs time to himself to focus on himself. In staying away, he's actually doing you a big favour. It's time to move on from him. You don't want to end up hanging on to something that won't ever happen.
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