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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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I know my fiance loves me but it feels like there is an underlying issue and I don't know what it is?
Q. Hello Agony aunts, I've been dating my fiance now for a year and we've known each other for 5 years. after about 4 months I started to get separation anxiety because the honeymoon phase was slowly ending so the more she got comfortable and ...
A. 8 October 2013: Maybe she is not what you want in a girl. Now that you live with her you see her true colors. Some people just want to have that living together experience, without really being sensitive to your needs. Has it been a month since you last had sex? ... (read in full...)
I have lost attraction to my wife since she gained a lot of weight.
Q. Hi i have a problem,my wife is fat she has put on weight,I requested, advised her to decrease her weight, but she not taking any step to do it,due to this i am annoyed how shall i tell her that i am not able to manage my sexual intercourse, i don't ...
A. 7 October 2013: I decide to look at your posting history spanning from 2009. Please don't be embarrassed. There is something wrong with your wife. Turns out this is a bigger problem than just a woman getting fat. ... (read in full...)
Are trust issues the problem? He says if I want to talk about it I have his number
Q. The other day when I was talking to my boyfriend, he was texting someone else at the same time. He made a mistake and sent it to me and was telling me that he was texting his nephews son who by the way only in the 4th grade that has his own cell...
A. 7 October 2013: Although I feel it's rude to be texting and talking at the same time, I don't see how it's suspicious to be texting a young relative early in the morning. Maybe he's gone to a before school program and had time to text.
I am naturally trusting pers... (read in full...)
Met online. Should I be feeling uncertain because he doesn't necessarily show that he's interested?
Q. This may be a little long, so please stick with me. I recently joined a dating site. I've never done online dating, but I'm really shy with guys in person, so my sister suggested I try it. Among all the creeps, I actually met a semi dece...
A. 7 October 2013: I didn't start online dating until I was 28. I would say that for college students their intentions can't be that serious because a lot of them don't even know where they would live for the next few years. My experience with dating is that it goes ... (read in full...)
How do I come to terms with celibacy and life as a single person?
Q. How do I come to terms with celibacy and life as a single person, continuous search just makes me unhappy, and distracts me from leading a fuller life in other ways. I've spent the past twenty years bringing up two girls on my own, they've rec...
A. 7 October 2013: Single dads don't get dates? Really? I am divorced and single. As a single mom I would only date single dads so those young, never married guys won't leave me for a younger woman to share that "first time parent" experience with.
Maybe in your case... (read in full...)
Older guy for younger women?!?!
Q. Hi I'm a 41 year old, good looking single guy who only really gets on with girls aged between 18 - mid 20's. I just find them more fun and I seem to have so much more in common with them than women my own age. Do you think this is normal??...
A. 6 October 2013: Don't worry about being normal. If you are happy that way, who are people to judge?
I have an experience with a guy older than me. He used the exact same words describing himself, that age is just a number blah blah. What I found out is that he i... (read in full...)
Just broke up and feeling like travelling by myself. Any ideas?
Q. My ex broke up with me 6 months ago. I found it so difficult to move on. I dont talk to my friends a lot about how i feel because i dont want them to hear me whine all the time. I dont want to tell my family about it either. Im always an independant ...
A. 6 October 2013: You don't mention where you live but I guess you are from the UK. I would like to experience the real sauna in Finland or try a Swedish massage. Hot springs are my favourite too. In Scandinavian countries people are well behaved and they leave you ... (read in full...)
Do Couples Have to sleep in the same bed?
Q. My boyfriend always complains about the dogs waking him up in the bed (to late to untrain them now) and I always complain about my boyfriend snoring. The real question is there any true importance to a couple sleeping in the same bed or even in t...
A. 6 October 2013: You are certainly not the only one asking that. I just came across a new term called sleep divorce. There is benefit to sleeping in separate rooms. It's nothing new in history. When you get enough hours of sleep you are healthier, less cranky and ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for me to think that I can't be with a cross dresser?
Q. I have known my husband for 34 years, we have been together for 13 years, 8 of them married. He recently told me he was interested in wearing women's clothing. At first I didn't know what to say, I was very confused. Then I cried a lot and tried to ...
A. 6 October 2013: You are probably questioning, as much as you feel repulsed and don't understand what he is doing, at the same time you know that there are women who are accepting it. I myself can not accept a husband doing it. I can make friends who have fetishes. ... (read in full...)
Breast fantasy gone wrong.
Q. Hello friends, i and my boyfriend had good relationship, he used to fulfill my needs and i also fulfill his needs, our sexual relation was also fine, now i started have milk in my breast, he used to fondle with my breast l**k, s**k, etc. befo...
A. 6 October 2013: Your health should come first. I think if someone can disregard your pain in favor of a lifestyle that person has a mental illness. Breastfeeding is fun when it's done rarely. Induced lactation is done in history when a surrogate mother wants to ... (read in full...)
Does my landlord torment me because I'm a lesbian? She's driving me insane!!!!!
Q. hi. i hope someone can help me. i'm a lesbian and my landlord is a divorcee for approximately 18 years. to my knowledge she's straight although i've never seen her with a man, she has 4 grown kids and she's kind of dominant acting. she is very ...
A. 6 October 2013: This behavior is common among bosses. She wants to be the big Rottweiler scaring off a little pug. It has nothing to do with your sexual orientation. She is picking on you because you react to her. That fuels her enthusiasm. To piss her off the ... (read in full...)
I worry he'll fall for some-one else like he fell for me when with his ex
Q. I met my boyfriend a yr ago when he was still with his ex girlfriend. We were friends through his work - and nothing happened between us until after he broke up with his ex. He had said their relationship wasn't going well at the time and they were ...
A. 6 October 2013: He broke up with her because the relationship got boring. Most relationships get boring. Hopefully few years later he is ready to settle down with one person. Not that family and kids are able to stop a man from leaving when it gets boring. You have ... (read in full...)
An incredible night and now I can't get him out of my head
Q. Dear Cupid , A few nights ago I met this guy J . A really funny, laid-back, attractive guy [that was staying with a friend of mine ( J's best friend ) for a while]with whom I shared hours of hilar...
A. 6 October 2013: I think the love you are talking about is not referring to dating, planning for marriage and kids. It's the kindred spirit, long lost friend that you are able to share and talk with. I agree it is rare to find someone like this. I hate to use the ... (read in full...)
Why so bitter, when he cheated on me?
Q. Hello guys. Could use your guidance please. Me and my ex split up about 3 months ago (he cheated on me). I still love him, but know the split was the right thing to do. I am upset about the split, but I do not hate him for it, nor am I angry a...
A. 5 October 2013: My curiosity for human behavior/psychology has got me into trouble and made me stay longer in relationships I shouldn't have. I believe the word you are looking for is narcissism. For narcissists, normal interaction and rules do not apply for them ... (read in full...)
I have lost attraction to my wife since she gained a lot of weight.
Q. Hi i have a problem,my wife is fat she has put on weight,I requested, advised her to decrease her weight, but she not taking any step to do it,due to this i am annoyed how shall i tell her that i am not able to manage my sexual intercourse, i don't ...
A. 5 October 2013: Your wife is the same person you married when she was still slim. She did not gain 30 pounds overnight. Weight gain is gradual and most women get fatter after having kids. You know you are not impotent if you get turned on by other women. 3 days is ... (read in full...)
Have a boyfriend of 4 years but have a crush on someone else...
Q. Sorry for the long read, I don't know what to do and don't really have anyone to tell this all to. I love my boyfriend, we've been together for 4 years. We're both 23 years old and each other's second serious relationship. But for some reason I just ...
A. 5 October 2013: When you are in relationships you still find other people hot. I know you have tried to avoid him but your mind is still obsessing. You know you will never get with him but somehow your relationship is missing something perhaps outside excitement?
D... (read in full...)
Is it bad to change my looks to get guys to notice me?
Q. Is it bad to change my looks to get guys to notice me? I'm 19 and a sophomore in college, yet I have never had a boyfriend. I know I'm not the most attractive person out there, but I'm always extremely kind thinking my personality will outdo my lo...
A. 5 October 2013: I don't think it is bad. It's just that for some girls, make up comes natural to them like brushing their teeth every morning. For some, it's a burden and it's not good for people with skin sensitivities. I do understand the importance of looking ... (read in full...)
I know my fiance loves me but it feels like there is an underlying issue and I don't know what it is?
Q. Hello Agony aunts, I've been dating my fiance now for a year and we've known each other for 5 years. after about 4 months I started to get separation anxiety because the honeymoon phase was slowly ending so the more she got comfortable and ...
A. 5 October 2013: I am not an emotional girl either and what you call pulling away could be just chilling out and regrouping. It could also be that when you have separation anxiety she feels like pulling away because it stresses her out. It's important that you both ... (read in full...)
I have unfounded fears that my boyfriend would get back together with his ex if she wanted
Q. I have unfounded fears that my boyfriend would get back together with his ex if she wanted. They only talk via facebook message every few months, conversation seems innocent. Hi how are you kind of stuff. He does look at her page on facebook ...
A. 5 October 2013: I think I believe him. He is serious about you. People never forget bad break ups. Though his chances of getting back with her are slim, the percentage is not zero. This is what you have a problem with. The best way to deal with this is actually to ... (read in full...)
Is this cheating on me? He says he's just making her feel good about herself.
Q. I was allowed to see communication between boyfriend and an old colleague. It was sent after we became exclusive. He talked of how hot he still found her and how she still tuirns him on and when they would meet to see where this would lead them. He ...
A. 5 October 2013: He's blatantly telling you he will be seeing you two at the same time. I would not call that cheating because I would not agree this is an exclusive relationship. He's telling you this because she is just a "friend" to emotionally support so he ... (read in full...)
An incredible night and now I can't get him out of my head
Q. Dear Cupid , A few nights ago I met this guy J . A really funny, laid-back, attractive guy [that was staying with a friend of mine ( J's best friend ) for a while]with whom I shared hours of hilar...
A. 5 October 2013: Thank you for sharing your story. I don't want to look at you as something to fix, because falling in love and the pain is all too natural. There is not much people can say rather than find a local guy, do activities you enjoy, watch great movies, ... (read in full...)
My gf wants to mantain friendship with her ex and her former sex buddy
Q. I have what it's called Retrograde Jealousy (form of OCD) My gf (which I love a lot) has a strange past with a relationship (sex buddy) with a best friend (man) and after that a long relationship with a girl (which was the only one that she had - sh...
A. 3 October 2013: No you are not wrong. She should respect your wishes, otherwise you are not important in your life. You can't control what she does and what friends she chooses to hang around with but you can't choose to exit the relationship because she doesn't ... (read in full...)
Roman Catholic marrying an Atheist
Q. My girlfriend believes in god; I do not. We’ve always been very respectful of our respective beliefs. We were both baptised as Roman Catholics and raised in Roman Catholic families. As a Roman Catholic woman, you have a responsibility t...
A. 3 October 2013: I was baptized as Catholic but not practicing now. My son is not following any religion. In your case I would let your wife raise the child Catholic but let him choose what he wants to do in the future. The child could follow his mom's footsteps or ... (read in full...)
How late is too late to start dating in the modern world?
Q. How late is too late for guys to enter the dating game and start looking for a relationship. 25? 30? 35? I mean, to really just START! Never been on a date before, never had sex, maybe never even kissed a girl. This could all be due to many combi...
A. 1 October 2013: I don't see shyness as a weakness. You may want to go for a woman who likes to be in charge and make initiations. Having no experience can be a good thing too. You have the humbleness to learn and everything is a first time. How refreshing is that? ... (read in full...)
Me and my boyfriend are terrible at communicating, can this be fixed?
Q. Me and my boyfriend are terrible at communicating, can this be fixed? We have been together for over 3 years but I still find it very difficult to talk to him about the future or anything like that. I know we can't go on like this, but I feel...
A. 1 October 2013: Your boyfriend needs to know what he can do to make you feel better. It's true that "I feel" sentences is a step better than "you did this and made me feel," but it doesn't give him an idea of what you need.
From your post I am not clear what you ... (read in full...)
How do I help my friend who has been drinking again and has started making unwanted sexual advances?
Q. Hello. I would appreciate advice on how to help my friend. I am a 26 year old female, and my friend is quite a bit older than me. He lives across the road from me, and I know he has struggled with alcohol issues in the past. He used to drink a ...
A. 1 October 2013: You tell him you are disappointed that he took up drinking again, and that you challenge him to quit like he did before, or he is losing the only friend and support he has. You are not interested in anything beyond friendship. If he has no desire to ... (read in full...)
I'm confused after this kiss with another girl!
Q. Wer do I start I have this mate who I went to college with ! Every now and then we meet up to keep in touch! Through her I met her friend from the first time I saw her I thought she was pretty and felt unnerved by her! Maybe a year later I seen her ...
A. 1 October 2013: There is nothing confusing. We are all supposed to be straight, until one of us dares to act out our desires to the same sex. It's just that most people won't go through with it because life is much simpler being heterosexual and without having to ... (read in full...)
Am I giving him the wrong idea when we kiss and things? How do I tell him I want a serious commitment before I give him my v-card? How do I know he's the right one?
Q. I want to lose my virginity, but I'm afraid. I love this guy but we're not together, ive known him for some years and we recently decided to start talking a few months ago. I knew from years ago that he was the one I wanted to lose it too, but I wa...
A. 30 September 2013: I think you are giving him the wrong idea since you are not together. You have to define serious commitment. Is it just being exclusive together and calling you girlfriend? Somehow I don't think you mean waiting before marriage.
I think a stro... (read in full...)
I hacked her facebook from her phone and found she's talking to a guy!
Q. Hello am I 27 year old male who has been with my girlfriend for the past 5 months. We've been having some problems lately. I looked on her phone which I know I shouldn't have done but I went to her Facebook account and looked at her messages and ...
A. 30 September 2013: Friends of opposite sex don't say they miss each other. It's either a hook up or she's two timing you and the other guy, who could be her ex. When they are in the apartment they are not playing chess with each other. There is no good way to confront ... (read in full...)
I am afraid that our "relationship" is more physical than emotional for him.
Q. I've been dating this man for about 2 months now and am concerned where our "relationship" is going. When we first started talking I told him I was not interested in any type of relationship or fling or anything in between. Despite that we began ...
A. 29 September 2013: I would wait for one more month after the divorce is over, then he would have less excuse to be hesitant. Two months is not an awfully long time to be taking things slow. To be taking you out to a cabin he does see you dearly. For right now you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is flipping out because my family is here helping with our new baby!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 7 years and just had a baby a month ago he goes to school and works and I stay home on leave, my family and him dont get along and lately my family has been up to help me out with the baby because ...
A. 29 September 2013: Your family is very nice to help you out but you need to let them know that them being there creates more stress for you. Your boyfriend needs to manage his anger better so he's at least polite and civil with them. If he is allergic to nail paint ... (read in full...)
Sex buddies forever or could there be more? I've fallen for him!
Q. Okay... So here goes, I am current having sex ( we have done it once) with a guy.... We decided we were going to meet with each other around 14 months ago and thats how it was going to be... Since then we have texted like crazy (flirty messages and ...
A. 29 September 2013: For him a future means that a person won't appreciate what he has (wife and kids) and will want what he can't have (affair, another sex buddy). You are saying that if a person makes him feel that way then that person is not right for him but he ... (read in full...)
Should I stay in contact with him after such a rocky start?
Q. Okay I just recently joined another dating site. It is a little different from the ones I have been on. It is a site for people who are spiritual and are into healing. I tried it out for free for about a week and then I get a message from a guy who ...
A. 29 September 2013: He's 10 years older than your desired age bracket. When he heard you would date a 30 he immediately thought you were a cougar, and older guys don't like cougars. The stereotype of these women are that they are men eaters so it's hard to think of ... (read in full...)
My Uncle's solution has upset me. What can I do? He wants to disappear as payback for his wife's adultery.
Q. Dear Aunts i now find myself asking you for your advice on this family issue. My uncle and aunt have played a critical role in my up bringing for the first fifteen years of my life. My uncle confided in me that his wife my aunt confessed to him t...
A. 29 September 2013: If it's a one time affair lasting a month, then maybe you could say why throw away a 25 year marriage. This is a woman who chose to cheat for 4/5 of their marriage. They lived a lie and he has no desire to fix it. She only confessed probably because ... (read in full...)
How can I not be tight after having sex just once?
Q. Hi guys! I wanna ask some advice from u. I have a first boyfriend now at my 28yrs of age. He's been my bf for a week. Then he was assigned to my area and s0mething happened to us. It is my first time to have sex in my entire life. I wanna ask why is ...
A. 28 September 2013: Vaginal tightness, elasticity and lubrication has to do with estrogen and hormonal balance. Tell him that you've had surgery before. It's ignorance to think that having previous penises change the size of a vagina. Kegel exercises help. There are ... (read in full...)
My new boyfriend's ex is pregnant. How do I handle this?
Q. I am a 22 year old girl who has a 27 year old boyfriend of one month. It basically took us 3 months to actually become an item, we are so alike yet different, I guess that's why we connect, love each other dearly. Our worst fear is losing each ...
A. 28 September 2013: He was still messing with his ex when dating you. A young girl like you should not have to deal with a man with ex baggage. You are still in love with him, it is hard to break up with him just like that but always know that when you can't handle it ... (read in full...)
I think we're on a break. What do I do from here?
Q. My boyfriend and I have apparently went on a forced break by him, not me. We've been together for 3 years. He's 35 and I'm 31. We don't live together and would see each other once or twice a week and then spend the weekends together. We started ...
A. 28 September 2013: I don't do breaks so I would do nothing. You don't live together, just spending weekends. Maybe he wants to relax during weekends and you want to be entertained? You don't want to go back to him, give him sex, then have him withdraw again. I agree ... (read in full...)
What's the difference between "real sex" and soft, vanilla-porn?
Q. I have yet to be in a relationship or, as pathetic as it is to admit, have sex (mostly because - and it's not a low self-esteem thing - I'm unattractive; women aren't interested in me, never have and it seems like never will; I get it, and I'm okay ...
A. 28 September 2013: For me, not much difference. The most realistic videos out there are homemade amateur videos. Real means pubic hair, flabby skin, no make up and spontaneous positions.
The women who are upset on this site are so because their husbands look at youn... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is letting me go, while keeping her blood results secret. What should I do?
Q. So, I'm 30 and my girlfriend is 23, we live in different far countries, we've had plans of her coming over to stay with me on December, and getting married around next February, we've even managed her a job over here, and everything was working out ...
A. 27 September 2013: She's not trying to end the relationship if she's still communicating with you. Reread everything and see if this comes across strange. She had known your friend since she was 11. This is only possible if your friend is also American but had moved ... (read in full...)
One minute he wants marriage, the next he gives me up?
Q. His feelings are so wishy washy One minute he says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me then the next he says Im his bestfriend. Then he'll say that he wants to be committed and then get married and then next he says, I should be with s...
A. 27 September 2013: That's even more absurd. I think he has a great fear of being taken advantage of so he thought that by distancing himself you would constantly prove yourself to him. That's the only way he feels safe in a relationship. Stay with him if you want take ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is letting me go, while keeping her blood results secret. What should I do?
Q. So, I'm 30 and my girlfriend is 23, we live in different far countries, we've had plans of her coming over to stay with me on December, and getting married around next February, we've even managed her a job over here, and everything was working out ...
A. 27 September 2013: I know it is a hard thing to accept, and you might wonder what if this is really true and she's not cooking up some story to let you down gently? Then you would be a jerk to just leave her alone suffering, and she wonders how can someone be so ... (read in full...)
One minute he wants marriage, the next he gives me up?
Q. His feelings are so wishy washy One minute he says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me then the next he says Im his bestfriend. Then he'll say that he wants to be committed and then get married and then next he says, I should be with s...
A. 27 September 2013: This is simple. The talking about the future past makes you stay. The backing out part absolves him from responsibility. He says you are not together. So don't talk to him anymore. It really doesn't have to be analyzed in depth. You are either ... (read in full...)
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