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... Send *ddie a private message | | | *ddie's profile:Hi there. I go by Eddie. I'm from Canada. I have a great wife and two great kids, both teenagers. I've been with my wife for 21 years and we dated for two years before that.
I enjoy travel and learning new things. Different cultures interest me and what makes them tick. I think there is always a reason for the way certain cultures do things and many times we are too quick to judge things that we find odd.
The more places I go and the more people I meet, the more I see that we are so similar. Everybody is trying to enjoy life but we are all influenced along the way by the stuff that "happens". The trick is to learn from the lessons and carry on. I have a short fuse for infedility and take marriage very seriously. It's not from personal experiences either. I just don't understand why people don't seem to fix the problems in their marriages before they create more. I see lots of questions on this site pertaining to this topic, that's why I added this part. |
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| Latest articles: Why do people think the unattached person in a love triangle is a victim?
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 September 2007: Why is it that people get involved in love triangles and feel rejected when they don't work out? Why do so many agony aunts treat the third member of the triangle as a victim? I'm tired of hearing people reccommend.... "distance yourself from hi...
Fidelity and marriage
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 May 2007: Many times, we see questions asking for advice about marriage, monotony and fidelity. I tend to be cut and dry on this topic and often without compassion for the person struggling in this area. What bothers me most, is the ability of people to ...
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Feeling odd after boyfriend told me about three some three years ago. Please help!
Q. Hi - My boyfriend who I've known for 18 months told me about something he did about 7 years ago which has left me feeling really odd towards him. He said he'd been out drinking with two female friends and a male friend. Three of them went back to ...
A. 12 August 2007: Ok, he went back to the woman's house with his friend. He got some "pretty serious action in a threesome", although he didn't have sex with the woman.....So am I to understand he had sex with the guy? Who did he have action with?
Also, why are ... (read in full...)
I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that?
Q. I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that? What is so wrong about it? What is everyone's opinion on me? ...
A. 11 August 2007: There are many types of dead end forms of employment. People work for years doing jobs that pay minimum wage and have no benefits. Many people find themselves in the position of sink or swim. Many people have many hurdles to overcome. Some ... (read in full...)
I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that?
Q. I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that? What is so wrong about it? What is everyone's opinion on me? ...
A. 11 August 2007: I disagree Yos. I think porn has changed. I don't think it's a great job but I'd bet most people who do it now, choose to do it. There are many terrible jobs out there. Porn is one of them. There are terrible instances of people who have had ... (read in full...)
I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that?
Q. I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that? What is so wrong about it? What is everyone's opinion on me? ...
A. 11 August 2007: I disagree Yos. I think porn has changed. I don't think it's a great job but I'd bet most people who do it now, choose to do it. There are many terrible jobs out there. Porn is one of them. There are terrible instances of people who have had ... (read in full...)
I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that?
Q. I'm an 18 year old and a porn model. Most people look down on me. Why is that? What is so wrong about it? What is everyone's opinion on me? ...
A. 10 August 2007: I agree with martini. I also think the anonymous female aunt is once again grinding her axe and lumping all men into a big dirty pile. It's a shame she lives life with blinders on. There is no man good enough for her. In the end women control ... (read in full...)
I just want my husband back!
Q. I have been married for 18 years. I have two kids and raised my step daughter since age 2. Over the years, I had a great marriage. We always had an exciting sex life and looked forward to those intimate times. My Husband had full custody of his ...
A. 10 August 2007: I don't believe you can solve this by prayer. Prayer may help you to be strong but you're also going to need some outside intervention. What was your husbands past like, before you met him? What Basschick said is probably true. There was a part ... (read in full...)
She has got looser, is she cheating?
Q. i suspect that my wife is cheating on me.her vagina has become looser suddenly.it was tighter for more than one year after the birth of our one and only child.is my suspicion right?...
A. 9 August 2007: That is a real stretch, jumping to the conclusion your wife is cheating because her vagina feels looser. Maybe your penis has become smaller......... (read in full...)
My boyfriend constantly gives me a hard time for my past, and it makes me miserable!
Q. Dear Cupid, I am writing with tears on my eyes 'cause devastated. I will try to make my story short. I met my bf while in college and while in college I acted a little crazy and mess around with a couple of guys. My bf and I were not together...
A. 8 August 2007: What did you do in college that was so bad? I agree with the others. The next time he rubs your face in something you did when he was not in a relationship with you, leave. It's an old subject between the two of you and the is NOTHING you can do ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and I fight so much, and there are other guys out there that like me!
Q. Everyone I need your help!Please if anyone can give me answers i need em. Ive been dating my bf for a little more than half a year. Its been amazing none the less but we are getting in to more and more fights!Its unbareable! And to make matters ...
A. 8 August 2007: The fact other guys like you is a given. IF you're interested in your current relationship you have to get that out of your head. It means nothing. If you're looking for a change, then you could use the same information to help you to decide that ... (read in full...)
He doesnt turn me on anymore and I wonder if I am still in love with him. I have feelings for another man.
Q. I am having doubts about my relationship. We have been together for 6 years nearly and living together for 1 year. My boyfriend is the best anyone could ever wish for, he is kind and would do anything for me and I know he loves me so much but lately ...
A. 7 August 2007: It's not necessarily that you don't love him, the relationship has just become mundane. Just like the next one will should you end this one. You have to work at keeping things alive. There is no magic or hocus pocus. We're all people and we get ... (read in full...)
He has trouble staying hard during sex... but not oral.. why?
Q. when i am having sex, i can give my guy oral sex and he gets erect, but when he penetrates me after a minute he goes soft, my question is why does this happen?...
A. 7 August 2007: I think it's quite common for a guy to last longer during oral. Do yo mean during intercourse he cums and then goes soft or he goes soft before he cums?... (read in full...)
He's gone and played the "open relationship" card!
Q. My boyfriend just talked me that it is ok to have sex outside of the relationship as long as you are not sharing any feeling with this other person. In other words, sex and love does not go together and having casual sex is ok. I replied by saying ...
A. 7 August 2007: I should have added that I don't think open relationships are a good idea for the vast majority of the population. ... (read in full...)
He's gone and played the "open relationship" card!
Q. My boyfriend just talked me that it is ok to have sex outside of the relationship as long as you are not sharing any feeling with this other person. In other words, sex and love does not go together and having casual sex is ok. I replied by saying ...
A. 7 August 2007: Why don't you go out one evening with friends or at least pretend to do that. Come home around 4 AM. When he asks you where you were or how your evening was, tell him you hooked up with a couple twin brothers and had sex with them. Tell him it ... (read in full...)
He says that marriage would be a waste of time...
Q. hi, i've been with my partner for 8 years and we have 2 beautifull children, our relationship is great, the only issue we have is marriage, i despretley want to marry him as i feel it's about time we properly commit to eachother, this is a big issue ...
A. 7 August 2007: I'm not quite on the same page as the other aunt. I won't go and call your partner self centered. After all, you have been living in this arrangement for a long time. You were also comfortable with the set up. Now you'd like to change. He ... (read in full...)
He said he was testing himself to see if these women appealed to him, and said they didn't. He said if anything he loves me more and realises what he has. Is he lying?
Q. Hi I looked in my boyfriends email account and although there were no emails (all deleted, even the trash) on the contact list was several email addresses of girls and an email from [a website]. I logged on and had a look and it's a sex chat ...
A. 6 August 2007: Dr. Pete is correct. The internet is at our finger tips and it's very deceiving. It seems so easy to log on and pretend like you're not really doing anything wrong. After all, you're just talking and these people are far away. They can't really ... (read in full...)
My wife slept with my roomate 6 years ago!! How can I get her to tell me about it?
Q. I just found out that My wife slept with my roomate while we were just dating. It happened 2X after I graduated and they were still at school. It is 6 years later and she doesnt know that I know. How can I get her to tell me about it without ...
A. 6 August 2007: How did you find out? Are you sure? 100% ? How long have you known? What stage was your relationship in when she slept with him? If she denies it, can you actually prove she's lying?
That is a rotten piece of information to have to carry ar... (read in full...)
Without asking, how do i know?
Q. how do know if she wants to have sex without having to ask her?...
A. 5 August 2007: What kind of question is this? If you're not married yet and she's naked in your bed, the odds are in your favor. If you're married and you have to chase her around the bedroom for two hours just to hold her hand, she's not interested. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend goes out on the weekend and leaves me alone with our baby
Q. Me an my boyfriend live together. We have an eight month old. He workd a 9-5 and i am almost done w/ college so i stay home w/ the baby accept for tue and thurs when i go to school. My boyfriend goes out every weekend fri, sat. Sometimes he ...
A. 5 August 2007: Where does he go? What time does he come home? He has the right to go out but perhaps he's overdoing it. It sounds like under these circumstances he's neglecting your relationship. I don't know the dynamics of the relationship so it's hard to ... (read in full...)
I wanted to still be friends with my ex, but now he won't respond to me
Q. I broke up with my bf 3 weeks ago and we mutually expressed the desire to always remain friends. After breaking up, I expressed the need for some space and no contact so my feelings and thoughts could settle down. Now I have tried to call he ...
A. 5 August 2007: People say and do strange things when they break up. They make sappy promises and such, to let the people involved down easy. In other words, the break up was sugar coated so it didn't seem so bad......I don't really want to be in this ... (read in full...)
My husband-to-be has just told me that he may have another child with another woman on the way!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months and we are suppose to get married next year. His ex-wife called me and told me that he has another child with someone else. I asked him about it and he said he's not sure if its his and that he's ...
A. 5 August 2007: "I'm not sure if I can trust him" What part are you unsure about? I think the answer is quite obvious. If I'm reading this correctly...you were betrayed. If he got her pregnant right away, in the beginning of when you started to date, it might ... (read in full...)
Do girls enjoy giving oral sex?
Q. Do girls actually like giving oral sex to guys or what? So many girls seem to have a real issue with it, like feeling subservient or degraded or something. But they don’t have any problem getting it!? What is all this double standards? I...
A. 2 August 2007: I agree on some of your points. As I always say, most men love an enthusiastic partner. It's always better to receive something sexually without having to ask, if only to give us a sense of validity in the bedroom. It makes us feel desirable and ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is going on holiday with her ex; am I right to be unhappy about it?
Q. Hi, my fiance wants to go on holiday with her ex and I just aren't happy with the idea - surely it's not a normal thing to do? Thanks, Confused...
A. 2 August 2007: I think your question is a little light on detail.....On the surface, it sounds like a terrible idea. It's difficult to answer though , based on the information you provided.... (read in full...)
How can I bag myself a military hunk?
Q. How can I flirt with single military guys? I'm currently visiting a military base and I have found some pretty interesting cute guys, but because of my job I can't get too much contact with them. What type of things can I do in order to get attentio...
A. 1 August 2007: Dress up like the enemy and walk around waving a white flag. When they approach, speak in a foreign language. Make sure you're wearing nothing under your flak jacket. That should so it.
Actually, just go to the spots where they go. What's t... (read in full...)
She is supposed to be my girlfriend, but she keeps meeting people she likes.
Q. Hello! I have been together with my girlfriend for almost a year now. I love her very much and everything would be fine if not for one little problem. Everywhere she goes without me she meets a guy that she likes. The last time that happens she told ...
A. 1 August 2007: Wll....she shouldn't be getting that close to another guy. Sometimes people mention what they did just to make it appear like they had nothing to hide. It helps a guilty conscious. Not that she's guilty of cheating physically but she knows she ... (read in full...)
Should i just go on strike?
Q. Taken for granted: I do 100% of the maintenance work, 90% of the cooking, my fair share of the cleaning and laundry, and more than half of the finances. Our point of contention is that she doesn't seem to notice what I do and gets her panties ...
A. 1 August 2007: I would suggest that you casually NOT do something she is really expecting from you. Don't make a big deal about it, just "forget" to do it. Then, do it again. Do not lose your temper. When she finally sees the light, it's time to sit and ... (read in full...)
My husband took another woman out on our boat while I was away
Q. My husband took a female friend/coworker out on our boat while I was away at a sporting event last weekend. He picked her up in her town (by water), met her at the dock of a hotel at the waters edge, took her for a ride approx 30 km north up the ...
A. 1 August 2007: Female/male buddy type relationships are not very realistic...usually. He may have a perfectly innocent friendship with her as they work and have traveled together. IT sounds like this bothers you, not based on evidence of cheating but on another ... (read in full...)
Is my fiance a liar?
Q. Is my fiance a liar? He went away for four days last week to look at a trailer in a different state that he was about to buy for his work. I asked why he had to go so long and he said it was because he wasn't sure what day he would see the trailer. ...
A. 1 August 2007: Anonymous....we don't have to give reports of our every move, if we're not doing anything wrong. He was gone for four days, he did some things while away, so what. He went to an amusement park...what does that indicate? It sounds like the poster ... (read in full...)
He gets uncontrollable urges to sleep with other women... our sex life is great, is this normal?
Q. Hi, I am so confused. I have been with my boyfriend for over 2 years, he is 34, me 35. We moved to China a year ago to work and during this time our relationship has gone downhill. Partly due to the lifestyle, not having enough space from each ...
A. 31 July 2007: I think he's trying to break it to you gently. We get attractions that are based on sex. I think men take it to the next mental level though. I mean, you could see a handsome guy and notice. You might stop there though. A guy might see a pretty ... (read in full...)
I'm a 64 year old male, and I have had a difficult time in getting the girl I dated in college out of my mind for the last 40+ years.
Q. I'm a 64 year old male, and I have had a difficult time in getting the girl I dated in college out of my mind for the last 40+ years. I'm completely happy and satisfied with my wife and love her dearly, however, as hard as I have tried I can't seem ...
A. 31 July 2007: Do not give her anything, at any time. It would be the ultimate insult to your wife, especially after your death, for her to find out you've been pining for some old flame. Honestly, it sounds like a scene soap opera or movie. Get your feet back ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is now divorced and has said to me he will never marry again!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for the past 2 years. We are both very serious about each other (we’re both in our mid 20s). It really bothers me that he sounds like he will never get married again. He was married when he was 19 and has a kid ...
A. 31 July 2007: Let him know how you feel. Let him know you're not that other woman who cheated. Let him know you want kids and a marriage. Then you have to set a time line. If he decides he's not able to do that, move on. If he convinces you to stay,under his ... (read in full...)
I don't know what to do - I have fallen for a guy who is married.
Q. I don't know what to do - I have fallen for a guy who is married. I think he also has a kid but I'm not sure, although I've seen him around with the kid a couple of times now. The thing is that we both really like each other but nothing physical has ...
A. 31 July 2007: Danielpew has the right answer.......back off. In this case, what you want, is not important. If you wanted your neighbors car, would you steal it? I hope not. Don't steal someone else's husband and father. It's wrong and you've already said ... (read in full...)
How can I change my mood and stop thinking these crazy things?
Q. I’ve been in a relationship for almost 4 years and I love my boyfriend to death. My main problem is mostly with myself. A lot of the time I’m creating scenarios in my head that I know aren’t true (and I have no reason to suspect that they are) about ...
A. 31 July 2007: You need to get some self confidence. What you said about driving him away is potentially true. It sounds as if you have some issues from the past to deal with I suggest talking to a therapist. You can not out run your brain, you have to ... (read in full...)
My wife talks to him on her cell phone every night till 3am!!!
Q. My wife and I have been married for nine years and I've just found out she's been cheating, the thing is he calls her every night on her cell phone and they talk till 3am every night, I confronted her and she says she won't stop talking to him, ...
A. 31 July 2007: There is not wiggle room here. She is cheating...PERIOD. Even if it hasn't become physical, it's still cheating. At this point, it sounds like she has no respect for you. Nobody who respects a partner would act this way. Except for a miracle, ... (read in full...)
We always make "a fresh start" but he ends up cheating. Should I dump him for good?
Q. I won't go into details, but I have been with my husband for 6 years and we have children together. Recently he started to mix with a bad crowd. He has cheated on me various times throughout our time together, but we always said it would be a fr...
A. 31 July 2007: Read your question, then ask yourself what you love about him. HE CHEATS !! That means he goes out, puts his private part in another person and comes home to you. He doesn't even care. Remind me again what it is you love. If he has cheated on ... (read in full...)
Should I put up with him going on 2 month long vacations without me?
Q. Am I overreacting? I live with my fiance and he said that he thinks we spend too much time together like any other couple that lives together and that we are starting to take each other for granted. So, therefore, he thinks the vacations that he has ...
A. 31 July 2007: Two months is a long time. Most people would not choose to be away fron their aprtner for two months. You can't control him, I wouldn't like it though. Is this related to work or just pleasure?... (read in full...)
Is my fiance a liar?
Q. Is my fiance a liar? He went away for four days last week to look at a trailer in a different state that he was about to buy for his work. I asked why he had to go so long and he said it was because he wasn't sure what day he would see the trailer. ...
A. 31 July 2007: He didn't lie. He didn't mention it. He sounds like he has reason to think that way too. IF he had gone to a movie one night and didn't tell you, would that be a lie? If he went out for a beer one evening, would that be a lie? You gave little ... (read in full...)
Is there any way for us to get marriage help without me taking a 32 week domestic violence course?
Q. hi my wifes feeling have change for me . we keep on falling out not all the time. there has been another person involved not sexually but some one who my wife would talk to . i got jealous and over reacted. i have tried to reassure her that now i ...
A. 29 July 2007: You say you over reacted. What did you do? Did you hit someone? ... (read in full...)
Been thinking of sleeping with this guy... but know it will wreck my marriage!
Q. Hi, I've been with my husband for 7 years and we are married for almost 5 years now. We have a 6 year old son. I recently met this guy who is married for 2 years now at my work. Lately, we have been spending time together during lunch. This guy ...
A. 29 July 2007: You already know the answer to this. And, the reason you told your husband about this was to let yourself off the hook. I'd bet you didn't tell him "ALL" the details either. I'm sure you sugar coated the lunches and the topics. That way you feel ... (read in full...)
my wife wanted to know my past, now she cant handle it. help!
Q. my wife and I are married 2 years. since the begining she has asked about my sexual past. not really feeling comfortable with this I reluctantly started to discuss my past. I am one that believes in not discussing this. my wife wants to know how ...
A. 29 July 2007: Explain to her that you love the person you met...her. You assume she is a product of her past experiences. You are happy with her and are not interested in the other guys she's been with.
I'm not sure what part bothers her. Is it the sex?... (read in full...)
Picture of my rival in his wallet. Shouldn't it be me?
Q. Perhaps this is an indication of desperation, so maybe someone can talk me out of it. I've been haunted by a sexy photo I saw in my boyfriend's wallet of my rival. Would it be awful of me to put in there a sexy photo of myself? Maybe it's a case...
A. 29 July 2007: Why does he have a rival and what do you mean he diverted to her sexually? Is that code language for cheating?... (read in full...)
How can I get him to trust me again?
Q. my boyfriend is leaving me because he cant trust me anymore. he saw a comment i left for an ex on myspace although we are just friends and have been friends for years. we dated about 6 years ago. my current boyfriend didnt want me to keep in touch ...
A. 29 July 2007: I think you already posted this question. One thing you didn't mention was the message you left your ex. What was it?... (read in full...)
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