A
female
age
36-40,
*elshlass
writes:hi, i've been with my partner for 8 years and we have 2 beautifull children, our relationship is great, the only issue we have is marriage, i despretley want to marry him as i feel it's about time we properly commit to eachother, this is a big issue for me as i feel that marriage is very important, he says that we are fine as we are and that getting married would be just a waste of time, this is tearing me apart, i dont want this to ruin our relationship but i just cant get past this and move on, what should i do?
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female
reader, welshlass +, writes (7 August 2007):
welshlass is verified as being by the original poster of the questionit wasn't an all of a sudden thing, i have always found marriage to be very important, he has known this from the begining of our relationship, also he proposed to me 5 yrs into our relationship and i accepted, its only been since then that he is saying that is as far as it goes and theres no need to get married, thanks for your reply xx
A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (7 August 2007):
 I'm not quite on the same page as the other aunt. I won't go and call your partner self centered. After all, you have been living in this arrangement for a long time. You were also comfortable with the set up. Now you'd like to change. He doesn't. That doesn't make him wrong, you either.
The other aunt says you have nothing to lose if you take a walk form your partner. That is a little extreme. You already said you have eight years, two kids and a great relationship. Those are things that you could lose.
If it were me, I'd marry you. I really don't know why e won't. To some people it is not as important. Apparently now, it means something to you. Perhaps it didn't before. Sit down and talk with him. Let him know how bad you feel. Let him know you're considering leaving. See how he reacts. Take it from there. Ultimately you have to decide. If you walk away, you're giving up a solid relationship because you don't have the paper that says you're married. I'm not sure it's worth it. Only you know. What made you decide this was so important all of a sudden?
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A
female
reader, welshlass +, writes (7 August 2007):
welshlass is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your answer, dont know if i've got the guts to do that though xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2007): Sometimes a man or woman needs a wake-up call, because they don't know what they have untill they lose the relationship. So take a walk and see if that will bring him to his senses. You need to shake-up his comfort-zone, as he knows that you will be there for his self-centeredness.Even If what I'm telling you should Back-fire. What have you got going in your no commitment relationship? Not much, as I see it. There's a Mr. Right out there,even if you are now living with Mr. Wrong. So go for it. What have you really got to lose, Not too much.
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