A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I’ve been in a relationship for almost 4 years and I love my boyfriend to death. My main problem is mostly with myself. A lot of the time I’m creating scenarios in my head that I know aren’t true (and I have no reason to suspect that they are) about my boyfriend and I make myself feel like crap. Sometimes I will look for signs or things he does (like look at someone walking by for a split second, not even a stare) to confirm what I’m feeling and make me feel worse. Sometimes I confront him and make him feel bad for no reason, or start to cry because of crazy thoughts and emotions I’m feeling. I feel even worse after when I think about how crazy I am. Sometimes I’m just so tired and down (for no reason) that I just want to crawl into a hole and dye. I don’t have a problem with the way I look (for the most part), I have a good job, and there is really nothing in my life I can complain about. I have come along way from a bad background and should be proud of myself but so much of the time I’m just tired and overwhelmed by all this emotion I can’t control. How can I stop feeling down and causing myself anxiety over nothing? I feel like if I continue this emotional roller coaster eventually my boyfriend will have had enough and find someone who isn’t as crazy. How can I control my emotions? How can I change my mood and stop thinking these crazy things? I don’t want to be a jealous gf that relies on my boyfriend emotionally for everything. I’ve tried to think of other things when these thoughts start but most of the time they overwhelm me. If you’ve been in the same situation or can offer some advice please help.
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (31 July 2007):
 You need to get some self confidence. What you said about driving him away is potentially true. It sounds as if you have some issues from the past to deal with I suggest talking to a therapist. You can not out run your brain, you have to determine what the issues are and why you have them.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2007): Hay chickDont worry, i used to be the same, and guess what? it was the contraceptive pill i was taking, messing my emotions up. If you are on the pill, please go visit your doctor:-)you sound exactly the same as what i used to be
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A
female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (30 July 2007):
 Feel like you're going crazy dont you. But you're not!It does sound like you are needing reassurance from your guy, thats why you're putting the pressure on him to make you feel more secure.Its weird isnt it, why its started. Although i wonder if its something in your distant past? Myabe some counselling might get to the root of it.I have had moments of insecurity and even subconsciously tried finishing relationship to get reassurance and it drives you insane!See if you can talk to someone about the feelings.Good luckC xxxx
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