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This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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Morning sex. optional? or required?
Q. I've been casually seeing a guy for about 6 weeks now. While I am not terribly experienced in sex and dating, I have been using this opportunity to gain a bit of insight into boys. The few nights I went back to his place I ended up leaving at 3 or 4 ...
A. 19 August 2010: No, waking up together just feels nice. After sharing a night of passion it's lovely to roll over and see the person you care about in the morning light and just feel like that person was there with you, all night, in your bed. You can cuddle right ... (read in full...)
Could birth control be affecting my libido?
Q. i have been with my boyfriend for 3 yrs and is like our sexuality has gone down for me mostly, before the sex with me and him was on fire and now i hardly get turned on by him anymore, i mean i still love him deeply but the sex is worrying me ,i ...
A. 19 August 2010: Yes, lowered libido is one of the most reported side-effects of being on the pill. If you were on for so long, it may take awhile for things to get back to normal. If in a month or two your libido doesn't return, you'll need to examine psychological ... (read in full...)
Why does sex hurt? And why can't I forgive him? Why do I love AND hate him?
Q. why havent i been able to forgive my husband of 7yrs for cheating on me and why do i love him so much but hate him as well? why is it that when my husband and i have sex it is painful rather than pleasurable?...
A. 19 August 2010: I'd guess it hurts because you can't forgive him. And why should be expected to forgive him? He violated your trust and hurt you intentionally. You have to decide if it's something you can or can't get over. No one would think you were a bad person ... (read in full...)
How can I make my girl feel comfortable with sex?
Q. my girlfriend and i have had sex like 5 times but we havent in a while cus shes afraid its ganna hurt...we both lost our verginiy to eachother so we are both new to sex but i cant get her to relax...what do i do?...
A. 19 August 2010: If 5 times in it's still hurting enough that she's tense and afraid to do it again, she's not getting enough foreplay. You need to get her turned on enough that she's really wet and things have expanded. Even then you need to go in slow. You can't ... (read in full...)
I'm completely in love with my BF... but I can't stop hooking up with other men!!
Q. Sorry for the long comment- I've been dating my boyfriend for two years now and i'm completely inlove with him- i think. when i think about him it's wonderful, and i love kissing him and he has the sweetest eyes. The problem is that i often ...
A. 18 August 2010: If he's your everything then you'll stop. You need to stop. It's completely heartless what you're doing, not to mention disrespectful. It's very easy not to cheat. See, you don't put yourself in situations where it would be easy for you to cheat. ... (read in full...)
No sex means no periods?
Q. Hi, i was readin some of the questions here and wanted some advice...sometimes when i havent had sex for a while i miss periods, its realy strange. Its been over a year since i last had sex, but a couple months after i split with my ex i missed a ...
A. 18 August 2010: I would speak to a doctor. This does not sound completely typical and could be a hormone imbalance.... (read in full...)
Any I normal?
Q. Hi guys! My penis is a little bit curved to the right hand side. Is that normal? It doesnt look straight! Do u guys get what i mean? For instant, a straight penis is 90 degree angle, right? Mine is about 75 to 80 degree (from the right to left). I...
A. 18 August 2010: It's normal. Almost all penises have some curvature in some direction. As long as it's functioning properly, you have nothing to worry about.... (read in full...)
My husband is into BESTIALITY PORN!!
Q. Help!! I have just discovered that my husband of 30 years is into bestiality-porn!! I dont have a problem with him watching porn, which he has not lied to be about, but I have recently noticed that he has been downloading tons of disgusting images ...
A. 18 August 2010: Yes, it sounds like an addiction. He's looking at porn rather than working. And your sex life is suffering. If you can't get him to see there's a problem and get him some help, this can't go anywhere good. You need to get him some help, he can't ... (read in full...)
My husband is into BESTIALITY PORN!!
Q. Help!! I have just discovered that my husband of 30 years is into bestiality-porn!! I dont have a problem with him watching porn, which he has not lied to be about, but I have recently noticed that he has been downloading tons of disgusting images ...
A. 17 August 2010: Bestiality porn is illegal due to the fact that the animal cannot consent. Generally if people start migrating towards this kind of illegal messed up porn like bestiality and child porn (migrating rather than having an innate desire right off the ... (read in full...)
Can only orgasm from missionary. Is something wrong?
Q. Husband and i have been married for 4 years, sex is great everytime but we are still stuck with the missionary position.I can only climax with him on top of me.We have tried different positions but never reached orgasm with any.I have heard great ...
A. 17 August 2010: Well just so long as you're both satisfied, there's no real problem. I would give girl on top a go though, since it's so much fun to take control like that! If you're nervous or have trouble moving properly, here's a way to do it that's super easy ... (read in full...)
I'm at a high risk of being hurt of these rumours are true...
Q. I'm seventeen. I work at Krystal and recently, a beautiful girl started working there and she's my age. We're the only ones still in school that work there. I've liked her for awhile and finally after work I just told her. And she replied by saying ...
A. 17 August 2010: When you say a whore, do you mean she sleeps with people for money, or she's just slept around a lot? If it's the former, I could see how that could be a pretty serious problem. If it's the latter though, are you worried she'll cheat, or is because ... (read in full...)
Masturbation is a chore!!!
Q. hii, i have a big problem, All i think about is sex, this isnt an exuse but its like im addicted. Im hooked. i have a girlfriend who ive been with for 17 months now i love her more than anything we have sex once or twice a week! but twice a week ...
A. 17 August 2010: Yes, it sounds like you've become habituated to doing it. Rather than masturbating out of horniness, I'm assuming you feel like you have to masturbate. It's more like filling a craving for something (you're basically getting high when you orgasm). ... (read in full...)
Is it a one night stand or rape?
Q. I've been wondering for a long time whether what I experienced was just a one night stand or rape. A while ago I went to visit a friend of mine at school. We went out, and I drank way too much. I remember I was flirting with this friend of hers most ...
A. 17 August 2010: He took advantage of your drunken state, a legal definition of rape. If you were in such a state that you can barely remember the night and have flashes of what happened, you were in no state to consent to sex, even if you had said yes you wanted to ... (read in full...)
My gay friend... or IS he gay???
Q. Please help, so confused! Okay so my absolute best friend in the whole world is gay, and i should make it clear that i love him to pieces so this is serious for me. We share everything together, always go out together and we're so close, everyone ...
A. 16 August 2010: Difficult to say while he was drunk. My two straight guy friend made out with a gay guy while they were both drunk, though he's definitely still straight. I also once heard a gay guy say he LOVED boobs and missed them (he asked to play with mine), ... (read in full...)
A question about precum?
Q. This is probably a rhetorical question but is there any way to control precum? I seem to be getting it even just when kissing with my girlfriend, it can get to a point where it can be a bit embarrassing....
A. 16 August 2010: You can't control it, same way a girl can't control when she gets wet. Why be embarrassed by it? I find it very flattering when there's a lot.... (read in full...)
Does having sex while on my period pose a health risk?
Q. Dear folks. Is sex during periods(w/out a condom)a health risk?...
A. 16 August 2010: Nope. Not in the slightest. Just a little messy. But it can feel great! Go for it (put some towels down).... (read in full...)
He thinks I'm too young, should I give up?
Q. I play baseball on a co-head team and I'v started getting close with one of the guys on the team. Needless to say we've had sex a few times now. Wouldn't be so bad if I wouldn't start having feelings for him. Biggest problem here is that i'm 17 and ...
A. 16 August 2010: When you get older, age isn't such a big factor. But the difference between in high school and out of high school is ENORMOUS even if it's only a month. Age really does matter and he'll be really harshly judged for being seen with you. Not to ... (read in full...)
Would these be signs that I am pregnant??
Q. im 15 i think i might be pregnant but not shore i had a normal period buy i have cramps my lover right back hurts i feel bloated my breast feel a lil sore wen i stand up i feel dizzy im always hot i get annoyed easily i sleep more then usual and my ...
A. 16 August 2010: If you had a normal period, then you're probably fine. The other things are not indications of pregnancy. They sound more like symptoms of hypochondria to me. If you skip your next period take a test. But since you had your normal period, I wouldn't ... (read in full...)
I love my b/f, but wonder if I might be a lesbian?
Q. Right, I don’t really know what to say but, I'm 17 years old. I have my first proper boyfriend and I really love him, he’s the only person who has ever made me cum. But the thing is, I get slightly turned on by the thought of doing things with ...
A. 16 August 2010: Nah you're totally normal. You'd be hard pressed to find a woman who hadn't been turned on by the same thing at least once or twice. Sexuality is way more plastic than people make it out to be. Almost no one falls exclusively into totally gay, ... (read in full...)
We want to have anal sex, advice?
Q. Hey Peoples ! , Me and my boyfriend are both virgins and we've decided to have anal sex so there wont be a risk of me getting pregnant , will he still have to wear a condom though? and is anal sex good? Thanks , :) ...
A. 16 August 2010: If you've never had sex, I wouldn't go for anal for the first time. If you wear a condom and use it correctly, you won't have to worry about getting pregnant either. They're very effective when used correctly! If you're nervous you could also get on ... (read in full...)
She can't be pregnant, right?
Q. alright ppl, here is a story: had unprotected sex, but i am sure that i didnt cum inside, and went to the shower after. Long time ago the chick was pregnant but without her own will. what are the per cent to get her pregnant? if the girl g...
A. 16 August 2010: Yes. That definitely changes things. There's a possibility, decreased significantly if you urinated. But if she had her period, that possibility pretty much gets rid of any possibility of pregnancy. Remember she's only fertile for 5-6 days out of ... (read in full...)
Trimming or shaving down there? What is the best thing for a man to do?
Q. Hi everyone, do u guys shave or trim ur penis hair? If u guys do, then which way do u guys prefer to do? Do girl like a clean or hairy penis? Is that ok for men to buy the hair remove products? Is that too gay if men use them?...
A. 15 August 2010: I hate shaved, it's too stubbly. But I insist everything be trimmed with a pair of scissors.... (read in full...)
5 months pregnant and still having sex daily??
Q. Hi. I had my last mc on 4th march 2010. I'm pregnant by more than 5 months. My husband and me were enjoying sex daily. When I became pregnant, I asked him not to have sex daily. But he wont stop. Till now we are having sex daily. But I am nervous. ...
A. 15 August 2010: You can't hurt the baby by having sex. When you have sex the penis never goes up into the cervix/uterus. You can have sex in any position you want any time up until you give birth and the baby will be fine.
I'm far more concerned by you saying you ... (read in full...)
What makes a woman come across as insane?
Q. I recently heard from a friend that my ex used to call me insane to his friends when we were together. I am a little odd in the way i do things but i wouldnt say i'm insane? And i used to argue with him over things that didnt matter to him but matt...
A. 15 August 2010: When she breaks his heart. Usually men who call exes insane do so as a way to not seem "pathetic" for being dumped (it's not really pathetic). I was talking to several guys who were like, yeah my ex was totally insane. She was always trying to ... (read in full...)
Girls, how often do you think about sex?
Q. I was talking to a male friend the other day. We were talking about sex and he mentioned to me how men think about sex practically all day. He asked me whether women think about sex and I said yes. He asked me how often. I told him I didn't know, ...
A. 15 August 2010: Often. About the same as with guys I'd say. All my sexually active female friends are the same. It's a misconception that men are more sexual than women.... (read in full...)
Should I tell b/f I looked at his messages?
Q. I looked at my bfs texts when he was out of the room and I found one that upset me a bit. Nothing drastic, just a not so nice comment about me. But shall I just get over it or shall I tell him I did it? ...
A. 15 August 2010: Depends how not nice it was. I wouldn't tell him you were snooping, as that's generally a worse offense than a not super nice comment. If you can find some way for him to kind of "allow" you to look (like joking around oh hey I'm looking through ... (read in full...)
Will I look too eager if I text him?
Q. i met this guy on a night out and we really hit it off. we exchanged numbers and we were texting for a while and he was asking to meet up, but we were both going on holiday. Ive been home 2 weeks and we havent spoke.. he knows im home etc. Does i...
A. 15 August 2010: No, just text him. It's been 2 weeks. No way will that seem too eager. Text him!... (read in full...)
Child pornography on boyfriend's computer
Q. ok my boyfriend and I have been together for 2 yrs. he likes to watch porn hes nearly 25 and a couple of months ago i confronted him on how much porn he was looking at only to find disgusting child pornogrphy on our laptop. he swore it wasnt his and ...
A. 15 August 2010: You're absolutely not overreacting. Some people who become addicted actually move to child porn due to desensitization (rather than being pedophiles). But he's most definitely lying about looking. If there was like one site, maybe a pop-up or an ... (read in full...)
He's a great supportive guy...but he has a pot smoking problem...
Q. My current boyfriend right now is 46. He smokes weed at most 2 days out of the week. It really bothers me, but he doesnt become a bad violent person or anything like that. I think weed is a bad example for our kids, we live together, but he doesnt ...
A. 15 August 2010: If it really, really bothered you/hurt you deep down he should stop. I'm pretty sure given the choice pot or family, he'd choose his family. Let me ask you this though. Other than you're worried about the example it sets for the kids, does his pot ... (read in full...)
She can't be pregnant, right?
Q. alright ppl, here is a story: had unprotected sex, but i am sure that i didnt cum inside, and went to the shower after. Long time ago the chick was pregnant but without her own will. what are the per cent to get her pregnant? if the girl g...
A. 15 August 2010: Actually the only way precum can get her pregnant is if you've cum since last urinating. Otherwise it has no sperm in it. The only sperm that can exist in precum are ones that are still alive in the urethra. And generally, yes if she got her period ... (read in full...)
If he cums in my mouth I feel sick the next day.
Q. me and boyfriend sometimes have oral sex. when he cums in my mouth the next day my body always hurts or my stomache hurts. why is that? ...
A. 15 August 2010: My guess is psychological. There is such a thing as a semen allergy but it's unbelievably rare (how would something like that survive natural selection?). My guess is something about it either creeps you out/grosses you out or bothers you about the ... (read in full...)
What can I do with this desperate longing to have a baby?
Q. ever since i was about 15 i have felt ready for a baby, then i just thought that its hormones, well im 19 now, and my need is even stronger, it hurts sometimes when i think about it, i want a child so so so much, and then when i think about it more ...
A. 14 August 2010: It's hormones. Some women have this switch that just flips and they feel like they need a baby. Like you just wake up it's there. Have you tried talking to a doctor about going on the pill? That can help. You're smart to know you should wait to ... (read in full...)
Shouldn't morning sickness have finished by now?
Q. Im just going to get straight to the point. 5 months ago i had unprotected sex and you guessed it got pregnant, i know it was stupid but me and the guy were and still are in love i dont regret my decision just wish i could of changed the timing. ...
A. 14 August 2010: Ginger works great. You can take it capsules. They even give it to cancer patients it's so effective at treating nausea. The gym, as long as you're not going crazy, you can go running or something. You're not going to jog the baby out.... (read in full...)
Is she avoiding sex just to get gifts?
Q. Hi Girls, I am with my girlfriend for the last few weeks and we have known each other for the last 6months. I am doing evry thing I can to woo her even at this point by giving her expensive gifts, flowers every week, expensive dinners etc.. T...
A. 14 August 2010: I think the two things, gifts and sex, are not connected here. It sounds like you're trying to buy your way into her pants, and it's just not going to work. She's your girlfriend, not a vending machine. She's told you she doesn't want to have sex ... (read in full...)
Why don't men notice when we go to the trouble of looking good for them?
Q. The other day I spent alot of time doing my hair for my boyfriend to look good for him and he didnt even notice! what is with that? I only had to point out the fact that I had spent ages on making an effort to look good for him and only after that ...
A. 14 August 2010: They notice, they definitely notice. They just don't know what it is they're noticing usually. Plus they've never done their hair really, so they have no idea it takes hours to make it look like that. As for make-up, most guys don't want to see it. ... (read in full...)
I love him but I'm on the verge of dumping him!
Q. So my boyfriend and I just got back from vacation, and we usually see each other on Saturdays, but like 2 days before he tells me he's helping his parents move furniture. The problem with this is, that I don't believe what he said and he hasn...
A. 14 August 2010: Why would you think he's lying? Maybe he really is helping his parents move. I wouldn't jump to conclusions that he's lying.... (read in full...)
Pandora's Box
Q. Im not sure wether this is fair to my loved girlfriend or not; Yet we recently discussed her sexual past for she brought it up. In the process she explained that she has had a number of sexual partners she didn't want to give me the number but she ...
A. 14 August 2010: "Women like sex too."
Thank you! Yes it's true. Me and all my friends quite like sex. Actually my sex drive is higher than my boyfriend's. Two my friends are the same.
In fact recently people have started to realize that once social stigma is taken... (read in full...)
We broke up, but I'm stuck with her dogs
Q. My girlfriend and I have been on and off for the last 2 and a half years. She had two dogs when we meet.Shortly after our meeting she had to sell her house. (which I helped get ready to sell with her)After this she had no room for the dogs which I...
A. 14 August 2010: I've seen people put animals up on Craig's list, fairly successfully. That way you can meet the person and decide if you trust them and you don't have to risk that they'll die in an animal shelter.... (read in full...)
FWB, but tired of putting myself out there and always getting hurt.
Q. I have been talking to this boy for over a year. He has asked me out in the past but now he is with someone else. He says he loves me and cares about me and I love him. I wanna be with him but I dnt think he feels the same. We're friends with ...
A. 14 August 2010: I have to agree with q. The only time I've ever had a successful friends with benefits situation was when I truly 100% had no emotional investment whatsoever. I genuinely felt no different if he slept with someone else (so long as he used a condom). ... (read in full...)
He's with his ex and sneaky. How can I get him to stop dating her?
Q. bad news!!! my best guy friend who i have a major crush on just got back together with his ex. i dont know if he is tricking me or if he is telling the truth. it is the middle of the summer, he goes to his friend's house and my house, so how did he ...
A. 14 August 2010: You can't change anything about him, but you can change who you hang out with. This guy sounds like a real scumbag to me. The kind who manipulates girls so he can get a cheap thrill out of feeling powerful. I really would try to find ways to ignore ... (read in full...)
He's with his ex and sneaky. How can I get him to stop dating her?
Q. bad news!!! my best guy friend who i have a major crush on just got back together with his ex. i dont know if he is tricking me or if he is telling the truth. it is the middle of the summer, he goes to his friend's house and my house, so how did he ...
A. 14 August 2010: He's not trying to trick you, he's dating her and no you can't break them up. Why would you want to be with a "sneaky guy [who] lies a lot?" And as for telling the truth, he's telling the truth. Guys are more straightforward in this regard usually. ... (read in full...)
FWB, but tired of putting myself out there and always getting hurt.
Q. I have been talking to this boy for over a year. He has asked me out in the past but now he is with someone else. He says he loves me and cares about me and I love him. I wanna be with him but I dnt think he feels the same. We're friends with ...
A. 14 August 2010: If you're friends with benefits, but he's dating the other girl, that right there is reason enough to stop. One, he's cheating on her with you. What does that say about his character? If he was with you, he'd probably cheat on you too. Two, if he ... (read in full...)
Pandora's Box
Q. Im not sure wether this is fair to my loved girlfriend or not; Yet we recently discussed her sexual past for she brought it up. In the process she explained that she has had a number of sexual partners she didn't want to give me the number but she ...
A. 14 August 2010: How many sex partners have you had? Women should be just as free to express their sexuality without judgement as men. Unfortunately that rarely happens. Here is a post on this subject of retrograde jealousy, the poster Yos has some great insight.
h... (read in full...)
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