A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi Girls,I am with my girlfriend for the last few weeks and we have known each other for the last 6months. I am doing evry thing I can to woo her even at this point by giving her expensive gifts, flowers every week, expensive dinners etc..The problem is that she doesnt like to kiss me or even let me come close to her at all at any times..Sex is also a big no and we have not slept together ever since we are together..she says she doesnt like it before marriage and gives reasons like she is conservative??this is frustrating as my needs are not met..sometimes I think shes just using me for the money, gifts and things I do for her.Can someone help with me the reasons that she might be avoiding sex??
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flowers, her ex, money Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello everyone I am back here stronger today after finishing with this women a long time ago.. I did exactly what was told
but still I cant stop thinking about her.. I dont know if this is love or just obsession..
dont know what should I do to just forget her totally..
btw she has moved on in another country so I dont have any contact with her..but still shes on my mind always..
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (20 August 2010):
 So she is not exclusive with you. If you want her to be exclusive, DUMP her and find someone who can appreciate you.
Seems to me she was just playing you to get something.
Move on, man.
Delete her number ( and block it) same with her e-mail, facebook and where ever else you have been in contact with her after you call and and dump her. It really should be too hard to move on, since you know know that she does in fact NOT love you. She loves what you can DO for her.. All the while she is seeing other guys...
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A
female
reader, Chippy2 +, writes (20 August 2010):
I DID tell you what to do - RUN RUN from this woman! There is nothing to fix - it doesnt matter what your sexual tastes were in the past - she is pulling some nasty stuff on you -
And Rough sex can be from day one or whenever - its what the two of you decide - there is no time period of when it should occur if at all -
The only way to get away and stop thinking of her is to READ READ what you can about women like that - google sociopaths or psychopaths or women who tease. Whatever you can think of to educate yourself about her - then apply it everytime you think of her -
It took me a year and a half to realize my bf of 4yrs is a narcissist and a drug dealer - and THAT is with - 75 people I knew telling me he was treating me bad. I thought if I was so into him he would change.
This woman you are acquainted with seems MANIPULATIVE. She knows how exactly to play you so that you are giving out and feeling guilty. 2 help you - make a list of all the uncomfortable things she has done - like playing with her boobs but not letting you touch her, etc. Then refer to it after you have done your reading research.
Ha! Good Luck - send me a private mail if you would like
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi guys and girls,
Thank you for your feedback and help.
things are getting worse now and I feel that shes dating someone else too...but keeps fucking my mind and telling me how much she loves me..I dont know why some girls are like this..Please guys ifyou have been in this situation please help me what to do..
now the last thing I want is revenge, as this is turning into anger and resentment. I want to get her on the bed the last time and finish this once for all. Please tell me if I could do something else..to forget this girl,
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 August 2010):
I'd say tell her she is in control. You follow "orders" and no I'm not meaning in a Dom/Sub relationship, but you need to take it a bit more gentle.
A rough quickie is FINE every now and then, but LOVEMAKING is preferable in the beginning of a relationship.
So slow down Cowboy, let her get her saddle of before you try to make her buckle!
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou are right q1605 I did press her for sex by pushing her on the wall and dragging her to bed, but she willingly did it too..I did manhandle her maybe and there were rashes on her pussy after I did that..I dont want this girl only for sex but I dont want to be used..I cant imagine a girl to go without sex for 2 months(its been 2 months that we have done it) I have been waiting for 2 months for something to happen from her side but she doesnt take the lead..guys should I keep pursuing her,I really love her but dont want to be used and made a fool of..please help me how I can get over her...thanx for everything,it really helped a lot
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Chippy2
Thank you for your answer. I think you are right, shes abusing me by doing these things but I dont know how to back off, really I think I am soo into this girl, i have never been like this be4, can you suggest how I could avoid her or get out of this without being hurt myself. My day starts and ends with her thoughts, we always talk to each other every morning when we wake up and when we sleep, sometimes shes soo sweet and says she loves me and all, really dont know what to do as my life seems so difficult without her being around...
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Chippy2
Thank you for your answer. I think you are right, shes abusing me by doing these things but I dont know how to back off, really I think I am soo into this girl, i have never been like this be4, can you suggest how I could avoid her or get out of this without being hurt myself. My day starts and ends with her thoughts, we always talk to each other every morning when we wake up and when we sleep, sometimes shes soo sweet and says she loves me and all, really dont know what to do as my life seems so difficult without her being around...
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A
female
reader, Chippy2 +, writes (15 August 2010):
Wait! I just read your follow-up and you said you have had sex with her and now she is playing with her boobs and teasing you?
Wtf? Run Run from this woman - Its bad enough to take you for your gifts if she is not interested - but she HAS had sex with you so it aint about her values and now she wont kiss you but she will touch herself in front of you?
You are being made a fool of - she is heartless or has some condition that I would say is mentally abusive to you.
Please please step back from this. If your woman is close to your age 30-35 she is playing you for sure and if she is much younger she is still messing with your mind - either way you lose!
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi Girls,
Thank you for your comments. I forgot to add that we have sex a few times before we started dating officially. It just happened that we were alone together and she said she did that bcoz I was aggressive. She says she avoids sex bcoz I am aggressive when we do it..anyways thanks for your comments and I will try to follow what most of you said, just keep on dating her, no gifts and see where it goes..thank you soo much everyone..and will keep you informed how its going.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2010): She ain't worth it man. Trust me.
There is plenty other tail out there that will give as well as take.
Flynn 24
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi everyone
thank you for your time, I just met her now and she was teasing me again by playing with her boobs and all..but didnt let me touch her as always, I dont know what to do as I really love this girl and dont want to loose her just for sex.
I will just carry on this way and stop giving the gifts and all and see how she reacts.
thank you girls, it really helped a lot..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2010): I don't think you two match up, she doesn't even like you to kiss her. Most women don't put out based on how much money you spend on them, so I would stop with the gifts.
Do you want to back off and just do regular dates, no presents or expensive dinners. and see where it leads you both? It's only been a couple of weeks maybe she feels like you are rushing her.
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A
female
reader, Chippy2 +, writes (14 August 2010):
Are you sure she is your GIRLFRIEND? A girlfriend would want to kiss you and sit next to you gift or not. I dont think this gal cares about you at all other than the gifts she is getting - and even at that - she is not a very nice person to only take your gifts.
I would stop all gifts and even contact and tell her its just not working out.
Yeh, it is not about wooing her with gifts for anything. A gift is just that - a gift. But I think she is taking advantage of you.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (14 August 2010):
 I think the two things, gifts and sex, are not connected here. It sounds like you're trying to buy your way into her pants, and it's just not going to work. She's your girlfriend, not a vending machine. She's told you she doesn't want to have sex because of her beliefs, and you need to either respect that or move on. You say she's given you her reasons. They're not crazy or farfetched. She doesn't want to have sex before marriage. Second off, you've only been together for a few weeks! Some women like to move slowly. If you think she's using you (it sounds like she probably is just conservative) try laying off the gifts a little and see if anything changes.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 August 2010):
Stop with the gift giving and see how it goes. I think it's ridiculous that you think you have to BUY her and that she has to REPAY you with sex.
People have different standards, morals & values, maybe you two need to talk about those and either get on the same page or move on.
How old is she? Is she a virgin or is this holding out something new to her? Maybe she has dated before and gotten taken advantage of sexually, so she is trying something different with you.
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A
female
reader, GettingHelp  +, writes (14 August 2010):
Try not spending so much money on her, and show her that you care about her by spending time and love on her. Show her you care by doing little things.
Are you spending money on her to get sex? Because prostitutes are cheaper.
Think about the message you are sending to her if you are buying expensive gifts to get sex.
However if she is using you, you need to think about how badly you want to be with her.
Some ladies just take longer to get comfy with a guy. She may be self conscious.
But respect her beliefs about sex before marriage. If you don't you'll get shown the door.
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