| Latest articles: About Facebook and relationships
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 7 March 2011: Here's some food for thought:
Since most people consider cybersex (even with someone you will never meet) cheating but porn is absolutely not cheating, is that an allusion to the idea that women in porn seem less than human? I've heard people t... (read in full...)
Getting him to take care of himself!
Q. Do any of you have any success in getting your husbands to take care of their own "needs" more often than not?...
A. 21 October 2010: I don't know if that's really fair to say he just wants to get off. I just listened the other day to a guy in a magazine waxing poetic about how his favorite way to show his love is to have sex with his wife and how it's the most loving act he can ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 18 October 2010: "I'm saying that, just as one spouse may have to go without sometimes, it's only fair for the other to put out for a quickie now and again."
I agree with this completely and get a lot of flack for saying it on other posts. If me or my partner (who... (read in full...)
Getting him to take care of himself!
Q. Do any of you have any success in getting your husbands to take care of their own "needs" more often than not?...
A. 13 October 2010: We're not saying there should be no secret solo activity. Well maybe minus the secret part. I don't think you'd find many couples where neither person ever masturbates. We're not saying you shouldn't encourage him to occasionally masturbate if you ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 12 October 2010: Yeah I read the article when it came out. When women aren't making $0.80 to every dollar men make, which is actually more like $.40 to the dollar when you factor in how much more of childcare and healthcare women usually have to pay, when women hold ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 12 October 2010: Just because a female virgin is desired, doesn't make it any less sexist. It's not desired for any natural reason, it is simply because men, being in a more sexually privileged group, feel they are more entitled to feel angry and jealous than women ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 11 October 2010: First to address the rape statistic, sorry I haven't looked at the statistics since high school, but according to Rainn.org (the largest American group working to end rape) the number is actually 1 in 6 now. Sorry for misrepresenting. Other than an ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 10 October 2010: Yes I read that article in NY Mag. I wasn't particularly interested in the article but I did read through every single last comment. I couldn't help it. I got interested from seeing the anger around the issue on this website, and then the comments ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 8 October 2010: Randomly from a cool blog (http://www.antipornmen.org/), apparently awhile ago some guy who worked as a porn reviewer for Hustler magazine opened up about his job, and had some pretty interesting things to say:
h... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 7 October 2010: Yes it is a lot faster and easier. I know, I've actually had a significant amount of experience with this too. What I'm saying is that it's just sad that it's so deeply embedded in people's sexuality that some people literally cannot tell the ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 7 October 2010: "For many men porn is equated with masturbation in their mind." I honestly don't mean offense when I say this, but I hear this a lot and it's very sad to me. People have been masturbating since the beginning of our existence, and it's only recently... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 6 October 2010: I've been reading around on this site for a long time, and the amount of entitlement many of these men feel about their porn use is astounding. It's been so solidly drilled into most of them that they assume that any woman who has a problem with it ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 5 October 2010: Not that anyone is reading this anymore, but I just stumbled onto a really interesting study from 1999, and I'm just going to copy and paste the abstract here. If I was doing the study I'd personally have picked a larger sample size, but from what ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 4 October 2010: I agree about faking it, I never understood why it became so OK to fake it. It's so deceitful! I can't even imagine how much that would hurt, to be a guy and find out you don't rock her world as much as you thought you did. Plus all it does is ... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 3 October 2010: "It common knowledge that for every one lie a man tells, the women tells ten."
Um, excuse me? That's an incredibly sexist assumption, just like that response in the marriage post saying white women are selfish and you won't date them anymore. I assu... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 1 October 2010: He could respect her wishes and stop. I know that some of the lying is about protecting her from hurt feelings, but a lot of the lying is also so he doesn't have to face up to the reality that he's hurting her and to avoid dealing with her getting ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 30 September 2010: "Why should the guys happiness over rule the womans? If she's already insecure and that makes it worse, why wouldn't he want to make her feel better?"
I've been asking myself this question for a long time. Obviously it's very hard to put your... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 25 September 2010: "In the US, the whopping 85% reduction in rape in the last 25 years tracks almost exactly with a corresponding increase in availability of porn"
I've seen the study you're referring to and it has some flaws. First off, the significant reduction in r... (read in full...)
Does it matter what girls look like when sucking?
Q. Question for guys (though ladies can offer their answers too!) I desperately want to give the guy I'm seeing really great head. But I'm incredibly insecure at times - not just as most girls are, it's a little deeper than that apparently- and ...
A. 22 September 2010: Everyone looks a little silly when they're giving a blowjob. I'm sure it looks hot as hell no matter what it is you're doing.... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 22 September 2010: "most men don't want to understand because then we wouldn't be able to justify ourselves being able to watch it,"
Right on the money. Because you can't justify a need for porn beyond a need to get off to other women. There is no other way to just... (read in full...)
Hes pretty much got a whole porno store should I just move on?
Q. My situation is this....I am 46 and my boyfriend of almost 2 years (whom lives with me in my house) he is almost 41. Little age difference there but not a LOT. Well, the first week after he moved in, I caught him in the office at his computer with a ...
A. 21 September 2010: Sounds like he has an addiction, since he can't even orgasm from sex anymore and seems completely beyond obsessed with porn. If he won't admit he has a problem or agree to counseling, you may have to move on. As well the fact that he lies about ... (read in full...)
Is online flirting and porn entertainment... a sort of infidelity?
Q. My wife is really upset that I log into dating chatroom websites, sex webcam sites, and porn sites and view the contents and talk to online flirts, such as myself. I see this as a bit of harmless flirting and a diverting form of entertainment. Why ...
A. 21 September 2010: You're interacting sexually with another human being. You are most definitely cheating unless you are in an open relationship. It's exactly the same as if you went to a bar, flirted with women and went back and masturbated together. Just because ... (read in full...)
Why do men in relationships watch porn?
Q. why do men in relationships have to look at porn sites of women and women as well as men and women and watch sites with other men jerking off?...
A. 21 September 2010: I agree. They don't HAVE to look at porn, it's not a need. It's a choice. Not all men watch porn, no matter what any guy tells you. If you don't want to put up with it, don't. I highly recommend reading this post:
h... (read in full...)
Why is LYING about porn and HIDING it even worse than the porn itself?
Q. So from all the porn questions and answers on here, it seems many women think a guy's lying about his porn use and hiding it are actually WORSE than the porn itself. They cannot understand why anyone would lie about something like that and go behind ...
A. 21 September 2010: Because it's lying and hiding. Why is it so difficult to understand why lying and hiding something that hurts her, is hurtful? You say it's to spare her feelings. Yes, I get that, we all get that. But it's exactly the same reason people lie about ... (read in full...)
If he lied about cheating, couldn't he be lying about other things as well?
Q. i have been with my boyfriend for 6 years an have a 2 yr old daughter.i just found out that he cheated on me.when i asked him about it he lied over an over an after i got all the clues he told me yes but he did not have sex with her.plus i have been ...
A. 20 September 2010: I wouldn't believe him for a second, especially that he didn't sleep with her. What does he mean cheating if there wasn't any sex? He continued to lie, even when confronted. He doesn't even feel remorseful, instead he just piles on more lies. He ... (read in full...)
I Don't Feel Pretty Enough To Be With Him
Q. So..I'm dating this guy, and he's really sweet and nice, and I think he's really hott. But I just don't feel pretty enough to be with him. I asked him if he could change anything about me, what would it be, and he said he'd make me have bigger ...
A. 20 September 2010: That was a ridiculously jerky obnoxious thing to say. However, if he says he thinks you're pretty, he thinks you're pretty. He's not going to wake up one morning all of a sudden and change his mind. He already knows what you look like and if he ... (read in full...)
Am I just overreacting to a man with a high sex drive?
Q. okay so ive been with my boyfriend for nearly two months now, we've been together before about a little over a year ago, and its safe to say that i fell for him and the feelings just never went. However lately ive been thinking, especially with ...
A. 20 September 2010: I don't think this is a sex drive issue so much as a drifting apart thing. A sex drive shouldn't affect how he feels about you as a person. If you feel like he just likes sex and wants sex a lot, it's probably nothing. But if you feel like he's ... (read in full...)
When wearing revealing clothes, do women want men to look?
Q. When women wear revealing clothes - like skin tight exercise stuff, or a busty plunging neck line, as two examples - do they want men to notice? Does it make women happy to catch you staring, if you do so discretely? I am a bit confused about ...
A. 20 September 2010: Yeah, it's quite a confidence booster to walk into a room and have every man turn and stare. The girls who wear real attention grabbers (the things that leave NOTHING to the imagination and are an inch away from stripper attire) generally do it out ... (read in full...)
How to get my girl to put her nipples out on display?
Q. I love it whe women dress so you can see their nipples. Thin tight material, etc. It seems that women love to show their cleavage. It's on display constantly. Why won't more women they their nipples be visible or just prominent under tight clothes ? ...
A. 20 September 2010: Because seeing nipples is very intimate. We wear clothes because we don't want to be walking sex objects. It's very uncomfortable to be stared at like that, and when our nipples are at "full attention" it's very difficult to get men to look at your ... (read in full...)
How can I convince my wife that an occasional non emotional sex night is not cheating or a threat to her?
Q. I am happily married. I love my wife very much, and would never contemplate having an affair. No interest. However, I really miss seeing and touching other womens naked bodies. The newness the excitement. It's just more exciting than the same old ...
A. 20 September 2010: It doesn't matter if it's emotionally attached or not, it's cheating. It has no biological grounds whatsoever to say it's a man's right. If you didn't want to give up the "newness" of sleeping around, you shouldn't have gotten married, end of story. ... (read in full...)
Do I have the baby or not?
Q. I am pregnant, of the guy who i have been having sex with, we have only been going out for awhile, bt we rarely used condom, nn he knows, ii didnt use proteccion of any sort. Now the problem is, doo I have the baby or not? Bec the guy who I truly ...
A. 20 September 2010: Only you can decide whether or not to have the baby. Talk to your parents, talk to a women's clinic. And for the future, do not have sex without protection. A baby will change your entire life, and having sex for any reason isn't worth that risk. ... (read in full...)
Will I always have to tolerate porn?
Q. I hate porn, will I always have to tolerate it being in a relationship? I mean, I only had one boyfriend, and we had sex, a lot. Of course, it bothered me he looked at other women naked. I didn't look at other men naked, because I knew it made him ...
A. 20 September 2010: "EVERY GUY WATCHES PORN! Show me a man who doesn't, and I'll show you someone in denial."
An institute completely dedicated to social science issues is perfectly capable of completing surveys on a touchy subject in a way that makes people less like... (read in full...)
Will I always have to tolerate porn?
Q. I hate porn, will I always have to tolerate it being in a relationship? I mean, I only had one boyfriend, and we had sex, a lot. Of course, it bothered me he looked at other women naked. I didn't look at other men naked, because I knew it made him ...
A. 20 September 2010: @ male anon:
Congrats! I read in a survey of some 500 women once that on average their attraction to men dropped by 20% when they knew he watched porn. So you just automatically made yourself way more attractive, as well as opened the dating pool... (read in full...)
Will I always have to tolerate porn?
Q. I hate porn, will I always have to tolerate it being in a relationship? I mean, I only had one boyfriend, and we had sex, a lot. Of course, it bothered me he looked at other women naked. I didn't look at other men naked, because I knew it made him ...
A. 20 September 2010: "30% of men don't watch porn? Haha yeah that's what they would answer if they knew their girlfriends were standing behind them. Honestly, maybe 3% of men don't watch porn regularly so I'm afraid the chances are rather slim."
Yeah.. It's your word... (read in full...)
Will her vagina always be blown out?
Q. My wife was married to a man who stuck dildos in her for many years. I'm not small, but I don't compare to some of the objects that are out there. So, I'm wondering if all those years of having large objects inserted in her has made her vagina too ...
A. 19 September 2010: Dildos won't make her vagina stretch out. The only thing that will is having a baby vaginally. Either she's just born that way, or you require more tightness than a vagina can give. She can work at it a little by tightening her PC muscles, which ... (read in full...)
Will I always have to tolerate porn?
Q. I hate porn, will I always have to tolerate it being in a relationship? I mean, I only had one boyfriend, and we had sex, a lot. Of course, it bothered me he looked at other women naked. I didn't look at other men naked, because I knew it made him ...
A. 19 September 2010: First I will tell you not all guys watch porn (around 30% don't) so you won't HAVE to tolerate it. The second thing I will do is link you to this post where pretty much all those issues are covered from both sides.
h... (read in full...)
Wouldn't you know if you've had an orgasm?
Q. When people say there not sure if they've had an orgasm does that usually mean they haven't had one? I'm just starting to question myself if I've actually had one. The way you hear people talk about it...its mind blowing, but what i think was an o...
A. 18 September 2010: It's not always mind-blowing, some women feel a throbbing sensation, some feel just some muscle contractions. It feels like something DIFFERENT though from just the arousal/excitement. There is a distinct release feeling, like after you sneeze or ... (read in full...)
Too much masturbation leads to less sperm later on?
Q. Don't know how to start but I keep on watching porn and masturbate frequently, like once a day. I am worried that the more I masturbate the less sperm I will be able to produce later in the years And for some reason I am not as aroused as i used to ...
A. 18 September 2010: Your sperm count in the long run isn't affected by how much you ejaculate. Your body produces it at a constant rate (you should refresh around every 48-72 hours). Obviously if you deplete your supply you'll have a lower sperm count for a few days. ... (read in full...)
My husband is into porn and ignores me, what should I do?
Q. I have a big problem... my husband is no longer intimate with and me but yet he finds time to watch all the porn he can. I dont understand it. Am i boring him? Am i not attractive to him any more? Its making it real hard for me especially since ive ...
A. 18 September 2010: Sounds like he's on a path to addiction. Porn becomes the biggest problem when either the partner lies about it or it gets in the way of a real live relationship, frequently both happen. This is not normal. As a solution if he won't admit he has a ... (read in full...)
My husband promised not to watch porn, but ...
Q. Hi Everyone.Im glad i found this site.Im really depressed and angry that my husband watches porn every chance he gets behind my back.we have been maried for 6 years.we used to atch porn together but suddenly he told me he does not feel comfortable ...
A. 18 September 2010: "he wants to see things he knows you don't want, assfucking, titfucking, gangbanging, anal, ass-to-mouth, or more than anything, a guys wants to shoot his cum all over agirls FACE. do you like that? probaby not. if you will do all these things for ... (read in full...)
12 year old boy caught "in the act"
Q. hi, im a single father and i have a question is it ok is my 12 year old son jacks off. I caught him in"the act" yesterday.i need help please help me....
A. 16 September 2010: It's perfectly normal. You should have a talk with him about healthy masturbation habits and "the birds and the bees" so he's knows what's going on down there. Even if you try to forbid it, he's going to do it. Even monkey's masturbate, and it's ... (read in full...)
Why does my husband want me to "whore" myself out?
Q. My husband is always after me to reveal my private bits to other people. For example, if we are going out for the evening with another couple, he loves it if I wear a sheer bra and a blouse that gapes open. We went biking on the path and he got me ...
A. 15 September 2010: He clearly has a voyeurism fetish. It's common and unless he forces you to do something that makes you uncomfortable or tries to pressure you, I wouldn't worry.... (read in full...)
Returning the favor
Q. Hi, Just a quick Q. If your partner performs oral on you does it mean that you have to return the favour to her ..and does it have to be during the same love making session? ..or can it wait till the morning?...lol...
A. 15 September 2010: No, you don't have to return the favor. But if you ever want to hear from her again and don't want to be a selfish jerk, then yes you have to return the favor. And you should probably try to do it during the same session, though if she is tired too ... (read in full...)
Aids & Bj's?
Q. what is the chance of aids from a blow job...
A. 15 September 2010: It would be near impossible to get AIDS if you received a blowjob unless he happened to be bleeding in his mouth and you had cuts on your penis. But if you gave a bj and he came in your mouth, then there's a chance. If you had a cut in your mouth ... (read in full...)
Advice on buying my girlfriend a vibrator
Q. So my girlfriend is a bit kinky, and wants to get a vibrator. I thought I'd get her one for fun, but I dont know what to get. I'd ask her, but that would spoil the surprise. They all seem to be pretty small with all kinds of "appendages", or very, ...
A. 15 September 2010: The tiny ones are bullets and non-insertable. Also, most women don't want a HUGE one. Pain in the butt, er, vagina to deal with. 6 inches is more than enough, especially seeing as we barely have nerve endings in there. Think about which things you ... (read in full...)
My good huband hired a prositute while away at Police training.
Q. MY husband went to Police trainging for a week in another state, the 1st night there he hung out with the other single cops from his job who spoke of prostitutes, he claimed he got him thinking and by night he had a prostitute come to his hotel room ...
A. 15 September 2010: Normally with cheating him telling you right away is a great sign in that he truly does feel bad and knows it was wrong. However, this is a little different. It does not show someone who cares a lot for people (especially women) if he buys a woman ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 15 September 2010: "Question- those antiporn, are you also completely against strip clubs etc?"
I'm not completely against porn or strip clubs. If porn existed in a vacuum where there were no similarities between what happened in porn and what happened in the real... (read in full...)
How accurate is the first response home pregnancy test?
Q. My girlfriend and I were afraid that she could be pregnant so she took a first response pregnancy test. She took it 4 days after she was supposed to have her period and it turned out negative. She is now 6 days late and recently moved to another ...
A. 15 September 2010: It's pretty accurate. Since she's still late she should go to the doctor and get a pregnancy test from them. They will be able to tell more accurately. She can also wait a little longer and take another. Stress is well-known for throwing off her ... (read in full...)
Why do I feel so bad after a bar hookup?
Q. Why do i feel so bad after a bar hook up? And why does seeing the one guy i really liked from a bar hook up a year ago, hurt so much? ...
A. 15 September 2010: It sounds like you want a relationship to start out of these one night stands, and in having sex you get connected to these men. It's hard for anyone male or female to have completely detached sex. When you have sex/orgasm you release bonding ... (read in full...)
I cheated and now boyfriend is still so jealous! Is this normal?
Q. iN THE past i cheated on my bf various times, n he forgave me, but now, he is extremly jealous, iff i dont call him every day, he gets upset, n if i delete a post on facebook, he thinks im hiding something. What do I do, is this normal?? Enough time ...
A. 15 September 2010: Yes, you completely destroyed his trust for you. If he ever forgives you it will take a long time. It is not up to you to decide if enough time has passed, it is up to him. You hurt him badly, I'm surprised he's still bothering to date you seeing as ... (read in full...)
Stopping your period once it has started?
Q. Is there anyway to stop your period from stopping once its started? I got my period today but i need it to be gone by Friday! Has anyone tried anything and it worked for them? Please anyone with any advice! I know it sounds gross but i really need ...
A. 15 September 2010: If you start taking birth control it should stop the flow in a day or two. Why mess with your natural cycle though? Tampons or a menstrual cup can make it seem like you're not on your period at all (you can leave a menstrual cup in for 12 hours). ... (read in full...)
Why does he wanna do that?? does it mean anything?
Q. i met this guy a few months ago.. he seems really different. (nice guy) hes really sweet but is too early to tell so am just hoping.. we are just getting to know each other at the moment. he wants to add my brother on the xbox so he play...
A. 15 September 2010: Nah, it just means he wants to get to know your family. Don't worry, it's a good thing.... (read in full...)
Why won't my boyfriend put on facebook that he is in a relationship
Q. My bf friend, put on facebook that he has a relationship with a girl, sooo then why the hell doesnt my bf dooo that. He wont put where in a relationship. And we have been dating for awhile, and we have had sex. Whats wrong with him??...
A. 15 September 2010: If you've asked him outright to do it and he refuses, that is not a good sign. It may mean he wants people online to think he is single. If he leaves it blank it's not as bad, but if he continues to leave his status as single, you should definitely ... (read in full...)
Hubby has his ex on facebook and I don't like it!
Q. Ive always had issues w my hubby and computers. If i am overeacting on any of this please tell me. Last month, he got a facebook and didnt tell me. The only way i found out about it was he was suggested to be one of my friends. No big deal. until ...
A. 15 September 2010: Having exes on Facebook is OK. Hiding his facebook from you, friending all his exes, and then telling you you're overreacting (to something totally sketchy) is not OK. If he wasn't active on facebook, I'd understand. But using fb as a way to ... (read in full...)
Frustrating sex life with husband. Thinking of trying anal or becoming bi
Q. i am maried,for 7 yrs and my sex life is not good.my husband dooesnt like sex like me.never had a sex toy cant allow me to have one and same goes for masterbation.lately i have been thinking about anal sex but he refuses saying its wrong is it ...
A. 15 September 2010: If he refuses to please you or have sex with you or try anything, he has no right to tell you not to masturbate. Sexual compatibility is a huge factor in whether a relationship can work, I highly recommend you re-evaluate being in a relationship ... (read in full...)
Could he be the one cheating and trying to blame shift?
Q. Hi I've been with my bf over 18 months. Its been turbulent. His highs and lows have taken a toll on me. He constantly accuses me of cheating (I never have) thinks I talk to men online (never have) calls me sneaky all the time. Looks at my cell. Qu...
A. 15 September 2010: Yes, that sounds very suspicious. That's a really common thing when one person is cheating, to constantly irrationally accuse the other person of cheating. And that bobby pin makes it 100x more likely. I think a little snooping might be justified ... (read in full...)
How do you tighten the vagina?
Q. Hi, Is there any means to get vagina tight after having sex 6-8 times in a month? it seems lill bit loose in vagina shape?...
A. 15 September 2010: Well Kegel muscles are best, but I'd imagine this looseness is imagined, which can't be fixed with Kegel exercises. Having sex, even if you have sex constantly will not and cannot loosen your vaginal muscles. The only thing that will significantly ... (read in full...)
She lied and I broke up with her, now I don't know what to do!
Q. When my girlfriend and I first hooked up, I didn't have feelings at all. She told me about the last guy she's been with and how she gave him head. I didn't care cause I was just hooking up with her. Months later and here I am 9 months later still ...
A. 15 September 2010: Maybe she didn't tell you because she thought you'd judge her (since women who have multiple partners sometimes get called sluts and dumped). I'm not excusing her lying, I'm just trying to explain her reason. There's a great article on retrograde ... (read in full...)
Getting him to take care of himself!
Q. Do any of you have any success in getting your husbands to take care of their own "needs" more often than not?...
A. 15 September 2010: I'm not saying it's not normal, but I am saying making time for sex is really important. I know once kids come along it's REALLY tiring, but sex is the way men bond with their partner. I'm not saying it's wrong, if your sex drive just tapered off, ... (read in full...)
Getting him to take care of himself!
Q. Do any of you have any success in getting your husbands to take care of their own "needs" more often than not?...
A. 15 September 2010: Once or twice a month is pretty infrequent (the definition for a sexless marriage is once a month or less)... Is there anything you need/want during sex that you're not getting? Sex is a very important part of a relationship. Do you get your needs ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 14 September 2010: I remember you also asking about women and porn and I read something interesting in the Washington Times saying women are MORE susceptible to porn addiction than men, basically because a woman using porn is far less stigmatized than a man using porn ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 14 September 2010: "Disagree with your statistics Person12345" I cited them below. They are from studies and surveys, the most prominent being from the Kinsey Institute, another from the Witherspoon Institute, several from other books, all/most from academic scholarl... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 14 September 2010: "Porn will always be around."
Yes. No matter what it is, whether it's bad or good, once it's been introduced it can't ever really just go away. But look, people said the same thing about cigarettes (they even had all the same "who are you to judg... (read in full...)
Getting him to take care of himself!
Q. Do any of you have any success in getting your husbands to take care of their own "needs" more often than not?...
A. 9 September 2010: Be careful what you wish for... Why not buy a bottle of lube, give him a quick handjob, then you're both happy?
And I love that male anon answer about using her bum and his hands! LOL though sounds like a pretty good idea... You could always pose... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 6 September 2010: “Problem with your statistics, that around this time, George W Bush targeted funds to promote abstinence and no sex in schools. The research I've seen said that this didn't encourage teens to have sex later, but it did mean those on abstinence ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 5 September 2010: As for teens, it isn't a good sign when you have 15 year olds quoted in the New York Times as saying things along the lines of why would anyone bother with dating when porn's so easy? As for boredom/anal, since 1995 (around when internet porn became ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 3 September 2010: Also when I talk about the objectification of women, I'm not talking about how women who do porn are treated. I'm talking about portrayal. If we want to get into the people who do porn, there is fairly little sex trafficking of men. There are far ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 3 September 2010: "Either men are being objectified and 'marketed' as much as women, or neither are at all. And frankly, if all you can see is said 'objectification' I think that says something about your insecurities." This is a joke, right? It's the old, well men... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 1 September 2010: And when I say all people, I just mean people in the US UK and parts of western Europe as that's really the only place reliable data are available.... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 1 September 2010: "it's 85% of people who use porn.."
Well actually it's approximately 70% of men and 30% of women who use porn, which means around half of all people.... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 1 September 2010: I said that you don't need any sort of "warning" traits like an addictive personality or family history or what have you to become addicted. Anyone can become addicted and no one is in any kind of a low-risk category. Some people may have a slight ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 28 August 2010: Well porn IS addictive and between 15-20% of users do get addicted. Sure not everyone gets addicted, but it is addictive. It's not like we gloss over how addictive cigarettes, drugs, and alcohol are because not everyone gets addicted.
"but sure... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 25 August 2010: Sorry for not responding. Today is my last day of packing.
Yes I agree with Gabrielle, in the past few years, maybe 5-10 since I was in high school, porn has changed. I remember being a teen looking at the stuff with friends a few times, and it seem... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 24 August 2010: Hey so I found a book you might be interested in. Well it's not a book, but it's a report by the Witherspoon Institute where they got 54 experts together to discuss the social implications pornography. I haven't finished reading it, but it's ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 23 August 2010: Mia I was saying it IS controlling. Definitely is. I was just saying asking people to do anything from not cheating, to taking out the garbage is also controlling. A relationship is just about deciding what kind of control you'll agree to. I'd find ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 23 August 2010: If men should give up porn to prove their love, should women also stop wearing make up and wear a head to foot black Burka (the black tent dress that some Muslim women wear) to stop other men from noticing them.
Actually my boyfriend hated th... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 22 August 2010: Yes I heard GGW has actually had a profoundly negative impact on many of the women who participated as well (shocking, I know *sarcasm*). Some have apparently been so humiliated by the experience that they drop out of school. Obviously some probably ... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 22 August 2010: Aunt in hiding? Well, I guess don't much like that. I am, well me, I just didn't want to be forever associated with being super anti-porn on this site since that's not the stance I intend to take when giving advice. But if you insist...... (read in full...)
Why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?
Q. ok, so my question is simply 'why is there no middle ground when it comes to porn?' It seems there are two sides, those for porn, and those totally against it. I have read many a question about porn on here, and there are the guys and some women who ...
A. 19 August 2010: Because frequently, people who are against it view it as cheating. So to them, compromising on this is like saying OK you can have sex with other women once in awhile, so long as I don't know about it. From the other side, they are unwilling to ... (read in full...)
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