Is he subtly trying to tell me he's not interested?
Q. A friend of mine often brings up "why are people gossiping, there's nothing going on between us". We do spend a lot of time together chatting, several hours at a time. We've cut back on that cos it has engendered a lot of gossip and it's detrime...
A. 15 January 2011: the 18 year gap makes no difference, most men prefer a younger woman, and anyway, you are thirty something yourself so as we get older age gaps are less of an issue.
sounds like he is really interested, but now (from reading your latest post) yo... (read in full...)
The dating scene seems to have changed since I was last in it
Q. I'm trying to understand something since it looks like it may cause me a lot of pain in the future. I am now separated from my wife. It was a long term marriage (over 25 years) but with a lot of trials. In my state you have to be separated for...
A. 6 January 2011: aw you've made me feel bad now justquestions! ;) i just can imagine that the lady that is into you might really fall for you and be hurt coz she's not really what you want or that the lady that you are really into could run into problems with her ... (read in full...)
I told my FWB I love him and now he is ignoring me.
Q. I have been friends with benefits with the same guy for over a year with the exception of one month when I tried being in a relationship. I have had feeling with the guy for a long time now and he has known about them. Last night I brought up the ...
A. 6 January 2011: what a swine! i can understand why you're upset! i suppose it just maybe boils down the fact that we can't love everyone we meet, no matter how hard they wish for us to, in the future you will probably meet someone that feels more for you than you ... (read in full...)
The dating scene seems to have changed since I was last in it
Q. I'm trying to understand something since it looks like it may cause me a lot of pain in the future. I am now separated from my wife. It was a long term marriage (over 25 years) but with a lot of trials. In my state you have to be separated for...
A. 5 January 2011: so: woman likes you - you like another woman - she likes another man. :) it can never just be simple can it?! does the woman that likes you know that you would rather be with someone else? does the woman that you are trying to get with know that ... (read in full...)
I told my FWB I love him and now he is ignoring me.
Q. I have been friends with benefits with the same guy for over a year with the exception of one month when I tried being in a relationship. I have had feeling with the guy for a long time now and he has known about them. Last night I brought up the ...
A. 5 January 2011: gosh, erm, he's a mystery isn't he? the only reason i can think of is that after his last relationship hurting him he is scared to get involved too much again (but he is already very involved with you!) six months is not a mega-long time after the ... (read in full...)
My live-in boyfriend refuses to do nice things for me asks me to pay him each favour he does for me!
Q. ok me and my boyfriend been together since 1998,we broke up for 2 years 2004 to 2007 he did he left. long story and i want answers for lots of things but my question today is why dont he want to do anything nice for me?? he got nothing for me this ...
A. 5 January 2011: good for you for still caring about the kitty :) hey if he cant/won't even provide for his cat i hope you never decide to have a baby with him, and as for his mother, look; she probably knows that your great and that just makes her hate you more. ... (read in full...)
This is so confusing, what should I do?
Q. Dear Cupid, So there's this guy, let's call him Joe. Joe and I met online, this summer, I found out he was in my school, so we chatted from time to time. We didn't become THAT close, but our relationship was OK one way or another. So wel...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
what's stopping you from talking at school? you don't have to be as flirty as you are on MSN but just be nice. YOU are the only one stopping you from doing it, so er.. stop stopping yourself! sounds like he likes you :)
xx... (read in full...)
How can I tell her she needs to make her mind up without risking our chances of getting back together?
Q. Well me and my ex-girlfriend broke up may of last year 2010.We was together 8yrs got 2 kids and was wanting to marry each other.Not going to get into the reasons we split to keep it kinda short.I have done the no contact with her i have went out and ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
you don't go into the details of why you two split up and that is fine coz i don't need to know but whatever it was it is giving your girlfriend big doubts about whether she wants to come back to you properly. you both need to address thos... (read in full...)
Is there a way I can get him back in my life?
Q. i am student of engineering,19 in age.when i took admission in the college i had a friend A whom i liked very much. he also liked me very much as a friend ,being a gay i had crush on me. but after some time a got some other guy B who liked me very ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
do you think he feels like you dumped him when you got a boyfriend? you have told him that you want him back as a friend so now that he knows that you are just gonna have to be patient i think and if he wants to come back one day he will. you ... (read in full...)
Does my FWB want more with me?
Q. For the past 4 months I have had this fwb..it was never defined as such. I met him online and we started hanging out and we see each other and have sex and hang out between 1-5 times a month. He texts me everyday lately i don't know if he likes me ...
A. 4 January 2011: good for you, stay strong and stick to your guns coz i'm guessing he'll be back! if he wants you, make him bloody well work for it, not let him have more of the same. i hope now your free though you will one day meet someone who doesn't have these ... (read in full...)
My live-in boyfriend refuses to do nice things for me asks me to pay him each favour he does for me!
Q. ok me and my boyfriend been together since 1998,we broke up for 2 years 2004 to 2007 he did he left. long story and i want answers for lots of things but my question today is why dont he want to do anything nice for me?? he got nothing for me this ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
he's what we call a 'mean sod'. what a shame this is coz its really nice to treat someone you love to nice things isn't it? but unfortunately i don't think he deserves stuff and i think you should stop. i love cats, but let it go hungry, its ... (read in full...)
When guys ask women about their sexual pasts, do they really want an honest answer?
Q. This question seems like a no-brainer at first... who's going to say they DON'T want honesty? But then I read all the posts on here from people (mainly guys, it seems) who are insecure about what their partners have done before them, and with whom, ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
it really depends on the man doesn't it? if he's slept with a lot or few, and maybe how confident he is about his own sexual ability. personally whenever a boyfriend asks me i just say "7". its not a lie, I HAVE slept with 7 (and some extr... (read in full...)
My boyfriend sent emails professing his love to another woman but won't admit it to me! What should I tell him?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years and just recently noticed that he has become quite distant. I now have discovered that my boyfriend has been communicating with another woman, has sent her a Xmas Present, went to see her for a weekend and ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
i'm so sorry to hear this. how spineless is he??! not only has he done whatever he has been doing but he ain't even got the balls to admit it. tell him what you know, add a few expletives of your choice and tell him to go. do not give him ... (read in full...)
She wont stop being friends with him
Q. So theres this guy I was in love with for like 3 years we were never together but now we kind of went our seperate ways and i have a bf now. The problem is is im still not exactly over him and i still thinkg about him a lotttt. well, my best friend ...
A. 4 January 2011: great, so you've lost a friend, she's lost a friend, the object of your desire still isn't with you and after you falling out with your friend coz you couldn't accept their relationship, now never will be with you. i hope you have a convincing ... (read in full...)
She jokingly said she might dump me, does this mean she doesn't love me?
Q. I'm in a good relationship with my GF for the past 5 yrs, i love her so much to the extent that i can do anything to make her happy. Now she said i'm too harsh to her, because i do talk to her whenever she is doing something wrong especially if guys ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
you said its a good relationship and that you will do anything to make her happy. does she do anything she can to make you happy? you said that she joked about dumping you, apart from this is she good to you and does she talk about having a fu... (read in full...)
I want a baby but my boyfriend is not ready...
Q. This is my situation. I feel i am ready to have a baby now, my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years feels he is not. he wants to wait until he is 30. when he will 30, i'll be 33. i already have a 4 year old with an ex. i know i'm still young, but my biological ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
well one of you is not gonna be happy with the outcome are you? maybe after long discussion and careful consideration you could compromise and ask him to cut that waiting time down by half? He is young to have a baby now and i am glad he know... (read in full...)
Is he subtly trying to tell me he's not interested?
Q. A friend of mine often brings up "why are people gossiping, there's nothing going on between us". We do spend a lot of time together chatting, several hours at a time. We've cut back on that cos it has engendered a lot of gossip and it's detrime...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
it depends on how he says it, but maybe he is saying it coz he wants to bring up the subject that nothing is going on because he would like there to be?? just a thought. if he is spending a lot of time with you and you are getting on well and ... (read in full...)
Is this all he can offer or should I push him for more?
Q. Sorry if this long or not a specific question but I just need some advice on what to do and how to handle the situation I'm in.... Met a guy 8 mths ago and fell head over heels and it got intense very quickly. He admitted he had commitment issues a...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
maybe if he had met you further down the line when he was well and truly over her then he might make good boyfriend material, but as he is now, he really doesn't. he is picking you up and dropping you depending on how he feels and if he feel... (read in full...)
The dating scene seems to have changed since I was last in it
Q. I'm trying to understand something since it looks like it may cause me a lot of pain in the future. I am now separated from my wife. It was a long term marriage (over 25 years) but with a lot of trials. In my state you have to be separated for...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
what you seem to be after is more of an open relationship situation yes? yes they do still exist but most women i think would prefer all or nothing. would you agree there is more sex before marriage nowadays? maybe this is why we want comm... (read in full...)
Leo guy has Libra female confused
Q. Recently got chatting to a british soldier deployed overseas. Seem to really click and have been chatting nearly every day for over a month. Have agreed to meet up when he is back from duty, which will be in a couple of months. Sometimes he is qu...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
forget the leo libra thing for now. you can't base a potential relationship on astrology i think, what you can base it on is the fact that he has already asked you for a sexy photo of yourself (i'm guessing he has not seen you before, is this... (read in full...)
My best friend has no time for me!
Q. I have this friend who I thought was my best friend but lately, she has been "busy" ive asked to hang out with her 7 times in the past 4 months. She even promised me we would hang out over vaction and we didnt! She still texts me and stuff but im ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
i think you should talk to her and ask her. could be something to do with work or studies not leaving her with as much time or has she made new friends somewhere that she is spending her time with? it may be that she has something on her mind... (read in full...)
How to comfort a friend when you don't have the words?
Q. A good friend of mine is going through a hard time and I want to comfort him and make him feel better, however when ever someone tells me their problem I never know what to say to them. I sort of blank out, and stay silent because I have no idea ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
be honest and tell him you are definitely there for him but don't know what to say to make him feel better, that will let him know WHY you are not very talkative about his problem. he is probably just glad to have someone to listen to him thou... (read in full...)
I kissed my friend's uncle! Was it the alcohol or a crush?
Q. It was new years eve and my best friends hot uncle was flirting with me and we exchanged numbers and a kiss. hes 8 years older than me but im not sure if its the drink that made us act the way we do or we do actually like each other, help!...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
(providing of course you are both single) ask your mate what her opinion of her uncle is, as she knows him, she should be able to tell you whether he is a decent guy or not. then as you have swapped numbers, text and see if you both want to meet... (read in full...)
I think I have fallen for my best friend
Q. It's a familiar teenage girl tale, my best friend and I are incredibly close; we've only known each other a few years but it feels like forever! There's no one else in the world I feel as close to; I can tell her anything and she's the same with ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
well she knows you're bi so unless she is in love with you too she needs to take more care about what she is saying and doing or else this means she is giving you mixed signals and confusing you. maybe she does love you as more than a frie... (read in full...)
She wont stop being friends with him
Q. So theres this guy I was in love with for like 3 years we were never together but now we kind of went our seperate ways and i have a bf now. The problem is is im still not exactly over him and i still thinkg about him a lotttt. well, my best friend ...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
yeah it sounds like you are being selfish. you and this guy never even got together, did you try to get with him back then? maybe this is why its been hard to get over him because its that 'if' that never happened. there may be something goin... (read in full...)
I told my FWB I love him and now he is ignoring me.
Q. I have been friends with benefits with the same guy for over a year with the exception of one month when I tried being in a relationship. I have had feeling with the guy for a long time now and he has known about them. Last night I brought up the ...
A. 4 January 2011: hey sorry, hope i've not offended you with what i said, its just that in most cases it seems like its the mans idea to be FWB and the woman will just go along with it, and then realises she is emotionally hooked and wants more. i'm a bit confused ... (read in full...)
Does my FWB want more with me?
Q. For the past 4 months I have had this fwb..it was never defined as such. I met him online and we started hanging out and we see each other and have sex and hang out between 1-5 times a month. He texts me everyday lately i don't know if he likes me ...
A. 4 January 2011: i think that FWB relationships can have varying outcomes, it depends entirely on 2 individuals so i'm not gonna say no, this definitely won't turn into more, BUT the fact is is that you've asked him about this and he wouldn't give you a straight ... (read in full...)
Is he only using me for sex?
Q. okk this is kinda a hard topic for me to talk about and iv asked al my friends and they have all said to just leave him.. but i realy like this guy but the problem is, is that im only just turned 17 and hes nearly 20 and asian so his family d...
A. 4 January 2011: hi
please try not to get carried away with these 'falling in love' feelings. take a step back, slow down and have a GOOD look at the situation and believe me, i KNOW that's hard to do! get some self esteem and tell yourself that only someone real... (read in full...)
He talks about sex all day but just goes to sleep when the lights are out.
Q. My bf talks about having sex with me all day but when it's lights out he just falls asleep. Why?...
A. 4 January 2011: it should be a two way street, not him expecting you to start it every time. he sounds like he's got a low sex drive, how old is is? do you think he could be stressed or depressed even? it could even have an underlying medical cause so he should ... (read in full...)
We've been talking about moving in together, I'm confused now!
Q. Im very confused hear and is actually driving me mad (And have read on hear before with some girl having trouble with a guy of of pof) Ive been speaking to this guy on pof for about 4 months now we speak on the phone mainly every day if not sp...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
loves an easy word to say and i think you know this guy is using it far to easily! he says he loves you and wants to marry you but yet he can't even make an arrangement to see you without 'something coming up' every time. if you only live 1.5 ... (read in full...)
How can I trust she is not cheating on me with her soon-to-be-ex-husband?
Q. i'm in a long relation ship with a girl and we fell in love with each other. she is married and has a kid but getting divorced now that we're in love (her marrige was not working and her husband cheated on her many times). knowing that her husband ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
just because he goes to the house to see his child does not mean they are cheating. he is going to be in his childs life for the rest of his your lives probably so you need to learn to handle it if you are going to stay with her. the fact that... (read in full...)
Does my FWB want more with me?
Q. For the past 4 months I have had this fwb..it was never defined as such. I met him online and we started hanging out and we see each other and have sex and hang out between 1-5 times a month. He texts me everyday lately i don't know if he likes me ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
does this fwb get the B everytime you meet up? the amount of times you see each other does not sound too seldom to me really considering he works night times, but will he make time in the day for you? do you feel as if he could see you more... (read in full...)
What should I think about his many, many pet names for me?
Q. My boyfriend rarely calls me by name...he has many, many nicknames for me. One day, he saw me with hair beyond poofy and he grins, and calls me a little llama :p Stuff like that...he only says my real name when in public...still rare. Why? I also ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
i think pet names are a sign of affection, but he still has the respect for you to use your proper name in public. he sounds like he is definitely attached to you coz he is looking after you by giving you lifts and helping you and the twic... (read in full...)
What do you think of this as a Valentine's Day gift idea?
Q. Valentines Idea Basically I really want to do something special for my crush. I know its elaborate but I wanted to do something different. I wondered what you girls (And guys) thought of it and how it'd make you feel. I was thinking of the ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
well you know this girl better than any of us strangers do so its your call. maybe you could ask her grandparents what they think if you are friendly with them already. for a girlfriend i would say this is a lovely idea for a gift! howe... (read in full...)
I have fear of dancing in public! Help!
Q. Hm, where to begin? Not quite sure if this falls under relationships, possibly more for dating, and it's not completely a question either, but anyway... The problem I have has been with me since my first days at nursery school (I'm now in my late ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
my ex boyfriend had the exact same problem and he felt like he really wanted to dance but felt far too self concious. i guarantee everyone is not gonna be looking at you, in fact you probably draw more attention to yourself by sitting alon... (read in full...)
Does it matter who texts first?
Q. Who texts who first, the girl to guy or guy to girl? Is it always the guy to text the girl first? What if a girl texts you first? does that mean she thinks about you? and If you text her back first and she takes at least 10-15 minutes and after sh...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
i think its fair if one day you text first and the next day she does. sometimes we cannot always text some one straight back if we are busy or with people (if seems rude to people if they are with you or trying to talk to you and you are play... (read in full...)
want my girlfriend to care about me more?
Q. I've talked to my friends about my girlfriend and tell them it seems like she doesn't care about me but she still wants to be with me and she tells me she does care about me but I'm just thinking she's saying that.. its been 2 months with her and ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
be patient if you want to stay with her. i don't know what she is doing that makes you think she is not caring enough, maybe your right or maybe she just wants to take things a bit slower than you do, like you want too much too soon? 2 mont... (read in full...)
If she means nothing to him then why all the secrets?
Q. Help! Im in a relationship with a man who has been engaged and he has a child. The engagement ended about a year ago (which is a short amount of time to start dating again) but when we met it was perfect.He opened up to me and i've never let him ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
how long have you been with him? how long has he been split from his ex? he cant be keeping you that much of a secret if his daughter and his mum have met you. are you sure that he is as serious about your relationship as you are? if he says... (read in full...)
Is he only using me for sex?
Q. okk this is kinda a hard topic for me to talk about and iv asked al my friends and they have all said to just leave him.. but i realy like this guy but the problem is, is that im only just turned 17 and hes nearly 20 and asian so his family d...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
if he has told you that he wants a sex buddy that is what he wants. now you should tell him what you want. if he doesn't want to commit to anything more, he is free to leave, at least you have told him what you expect. it is likely thou... (read in full...)
She called it quits but is stalking n playing mind games on me since.
Q. Looking for advice about how to work with my exgirl. She called it quits against my wishes but I've survived and am out.but she's been up to no good since we went separate ways. She been playing nonstop mind games and stalking me. She has no idea I ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
ignore ignore ignore! looks like she maybe realised she made a mistake leaving you, or she jealous your with someone new, or maybe she just enjoys getting to you this way coz she can't hurt you from within a relationship anymore. do all you ... (read in full...)
How can I rip him out of my heart and my mind?
Q. I'm in love with this guy who has showed me he doesn't love me back or at least the same way I do. He is self centered, bad tempered, some what paranoid, liar, drinks and smokes cigars that I don't like. After all this I should say to myself, w...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
first of all figure out if you want him in your life or not, coz its sounding like you do, even though you seem to know he is not right for you. make a list of all his good and bad qualities. i have been confused in the past about men coz alth... (read in full...)
I date a guy and then 3-4 years later I don't love them anymore
Q. I'm almost 28...divorced...2 baby daddy's...what's my problem? I date a guy and "think" I'm in love...then wake up 3-4 yrs later and don't love them anymore? Why can't I commit? Why can't I love someone for the rest of my life? I've always been like ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi i think you hit the nail on the head when you say you 'think' you love them at the beginning. looks like maybe you don't, but your maybe not seeing or ignoring their bad points or things about them that are not agreeable to you. no wonder t... (read in full...)
He says I'm being unreasonable because I want to see him
Q. It's New Years Day. My mother is in hospital after suffering a massive stroke three weeks ago. I have had little/no support from my partner since this happened to my mother. I phone him, I talk, repeating the details of my day, he listens ...
A. 3 January 2011: hi
you are doing all the chasing in this relationship aren't you. and he knows that you will. he is putting nothing in. a partner who neglects you especially over the Christmas and new year period is not really into you, sorry. i think he know... (read in full...)
Women who have a Facebook account turn me off. Am I alone on this?
Q. Am I the only guy in the world that won't give a girl who has a facebook acct my time of day no matter what? I can't stomach the site. It's foolish, ridiculous, petty and childish sorta like immature teenage mentality. I can understand teenagers ...
A. 31 December 2010: hi
if a person is wants to be petty ridiculous and silly they are gonna be so, with or without Facebook. Face book is here to stay so come to peace with it. you might one day pass up the opportunity to be with a great girl if you apply this prej... (read in full...)
Help! My girlfriend is too insecure!
Q. hey. my girlfriend is so insecure because of what i have done in the past or so she tells me. i Am going to be compeltely honest and i need you people to tell me if its me or if its her issues. We have been dating for 11 months and we both do l...
A. 30 December 2010: hi
well from what you have said, she does sound hellishly insecure and if she continues like this she is gonna have a really miserable life, with or without you. have you told her how bad she makes you feel and that she is damaging the rela... (read in full...)
Women: Actions Speak Louder Than Words
Q. Warning:(The following contains broad generalizations to illustrate a point, there are no rules nor concrete all encompassing truths in what I write, there are always exceptions. This applies to men too) I've been on this site for a while now and ...
A. 30 December 2010: nice one Cerberus :) you're absolutely right, words are just words but what is it about us that forgets this when our silly love hormones kick in? I've noticed this seems to be a more common problem for women, or maybe men just don't talk about ... (read in full...)
He talks about sex all day but just goes to sleep when the lights are out.
Q. My bf talks about having sex with me all day but when it's lights out he just falls asleep. Why?...
A. 30 December 2010: hi
do it with the lights on then ;) seriously though have you asked him why he behaves like this? it definitely doesn't sound right. does he drink alcohol or take any drugs that would make him sleepy in the evening? is he on any prescription medi... (read in full...)
I told my FWB I love him and now he is ignoring me.
Q. I have been friends with benefits with the same guy for over a year with the exception of one month when I tried being in a relationship. I have had feeling with the guy for a long time now and he has known about them. Last night I brought up the ...
A. 29 December 2010: hi
yes i am with dirtball on this. did you go into this in the hope that he would change his mind and grow to want you as a real girlfriend? your just gonna have to accept that this is still not want he wants. are you his only FWB or does he h... (read in full...)
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