I do not wish to attend my mother in law's funeral if husband's "Friend" will be there
Q. Very long and involved post so thank you very much in advance for reading. I have been married for a year but for various reasons my husband and I do not live together. This is mainly because I have a house from my previous marriage that my...
A. 12 February 2011: i'm glad the day went well for you then but it doesn't solve the problem long term does it. i think there is still some work to be done by you and your husband to resolve this issue
x... (read in full...)
Help with gf's violent ex partner
Q. Please help, my “GF” has come out of a very violent relationship of 8 years after a particularly bad beating from her ex-partner (the bruises were awful) she decided to leave him me and her have been getting on well for a long time as friends she ...
A. 4 February 2011: this girl has unintentionally hurt you, but i hope you can find it in yourself to just be there if she needs safety again. i also hope that she will one day wake up and leave him one day, but sadly the longer this goes on, maybe the less chance of ... (read in full...)
Help with gf's violent ex partner
Q. Please help, my “GF” has come out of a very violent relationship of 8 years after a particularly bad beating from her ex-partner (the bruises were awful) she decided to leave him me and her have been getting on well for a long time as friends she ...
A. 1 February 2011: oh gawd! i am sorry and i'm sorry for her! it just defies belief doesn't it? that some people will allow their self to be treated that way. very complex, wish she would accept help to make her realise she doesn't have to be with someone like that. ... (read in full...)
Is he cheating? And what should I do about our relationship?
Q. What should I do? Is he cheating? I love him so much:( I told my boyfriend to take a break from our relationship because I feel that he doesn't like the fact that we are always on the phone or texting. So yes I told him to take a break and he said...
A. 31 January 2011: hi
no, if you love him and you want things to work out you shouldn't ignore him! you really need to be talking to him about this. from the way you worded your post, it looks to be full of warnings that he wants out BUT we have only got your acco... (read in full...)
He comments that I smell great. Does he want to date me?
Q. There is this guy at my gym who will on occasion tease me about my workouts. He will make comments about the machines I am on and the weight I am lifting. Then one day I am getting a protein shake and he walks up to me and say's god you smell ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
yep he's interested! even if you didn't smell great, i think he would find something to say or a compliment for you
xx... (read in full...)
How can I get out of this dark place???
Q. For just over 4 years I was single. 100% single, no flings, no one night pulls, nothing. But in my 2nd year of uni I met someone from out of uni, and we started seing eachother, but i never wanted to make it official because of a previous ...
A. 30 January 2011: its lovely to hear back from you again and hear that you feel much more positive. it would be great if you can come on here and help others, especially those that are in a similar situation to what you were. coming out of the other end of a bad ... (read in full...)
I want my boyfriend to hit me.. Is this normal?
Q. For some reason, I have a strong desire to be in an abusive relationship with a guy. I want to be hit, thrown to the ground, or pushed into a wall. I'm not sure if this is normal or not though. My boyfriend seems like the kind of guy who may do ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
you know this is not a normal thing to want don't you? as you first noticed the wish for this in your childhood when you witnessed your mum suffering it i think you could use the help of a psychologist to get to the root of WHY you would want... (read in full...)
Time of the month she turns into someone else.
Q. Hey everybody, Really need your help so here goes. Thanks in advance. I've been dating this girl for a couple of months now and everything was going well up until a week ago. It's the time of the month and I don't want to sound like just a ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
yes i believe in PMT or PMS if you prefer, also the more severe PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder)
research these, the internet has plenty of information. does she have these angry outbursts just with you or does she treat everyone and... (read in full...)
Why did she say I was the first but then tell the doctor differently?
Q. hey , well I am in a great relationship with my girlfriend had ups and downs but we talk about our problems which I thin maes us strong. I am the kind of guy who believes in plain speain and no lies as I hate liars. Anyways my girlfriend and I have ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
she lied. so she had a reason for lying (embarrassment for stupid mistake in the past) but the fact is - she lied.
she should've NOT made a point of telling you that you were the first unprotected, she didn't have to go into detail unless o... (read in full...)
How important is the ring?
Q. She said "If I got an engagement ring I didn't like,or was to small I would return it and buy something I really liked." Part of me laughs at this the other part is scared out of my mind. Who would say something like that, I thought engagment was ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
i think in the old days it was acceptable for a man to pick the ring and present it to his girlfriend when he proposed (and this still happens to this day) but now when there is so much more choice (and consumerism!), it is good if you both pick... (read in full...)
Are men really ok with small perfect breasts?
Q. my boyfriend is a boob guy.. i know that he loves boobs,..big boobs especially. Im about 34b. i lost a lot of weight and lost most of my breasts( i was 180lbs now im 125). they are perky, he tells me he loves my boobs but always comment's on boobs ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
different men like different sizes. you need to be with a man who likes YOUR size. some men HATE implants though, coz they although nice to look at but they don't feel like breasts (coz they are not breast tissue!) and the thought of a fore... (read in full...)
If you knew a guy and you knew he was cheating on his girlfriend, would you tell her?
Q. If you knew a guy and you knew he was cheating on his girlfriend, would you tell her? I have a friend, well someone i know, and for the past 6 months or so he has been cheating on his girlfriend. He has approached me on a number of occ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
either tell her or tell her anonymously. she may not believe you but it will at least alert her to keep more of an eye on him, and if she does this she will probably catch him out herself
xx... (read in full...)
When I try to leave he tells me I'm being selfish and to think of the kids!
Q. i have been in a relationship with this guy who is 19 yrs older than me for three years now and we have two small children together and we live together. he doesn't want to take me anywhere. he always have an excuse on why he don't take me anywhere ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
no. he is being the selfish one not you! he is using the kids as a 'tool' to make you feel guilty coz he knows you love them so much. he sounds an a**s*.
your kids can be happy with you and him living separate as long as you are both hap... (read in full...)
He won't like it that I went out to the club -- should I tell him?
Q. So my frineds and I go Out To eat And after That they want To go To the club of course I'm the driver for tonight I'm engaged and I know if I tell him that we when to the club he is going to flip but I'm not drinking nor am i dancing with any guys ...
A. 30 January 2011: hi
yeah definitely tell him.
if you are seen by someone and they tell him but you haven't told him he might think you are hiding something. you are doing nothing wrong. he is your boyfriend, not your owner, so if he cannot handle the truth ab... (read in full...)
I had no feelings for him, so why do I feel like my world's come crashing down?
Q. I dumped my boyfriend because i didnt like him but only thought of him as a friend but why do i feel like my worlds come crashing down on me when i had no feelings for him?...
A. 29 January 2011: maybe your life feels a bit empty without him. arrange nice things with your other friends that you can look forward to doing. its not nice to lose people from your life and that's the same whether its a friend or boyfriend. its natural to be ... (read in full...)
I do not wish to attend my mother in law's funeral if husband's "Friend" will be there
Q. Very long and involved post so thank you very much in advance for reading. I have been married for a year but for various reasons my husband and I do not live together. This is mainly because I have a house from my previous marriage that my...
A. 29 January 2011: i'm sorry but i think you should shelve your own feelings about the friend just for the day. its not about you and if you persist with this protest you are gonna alienate yourself from everyone coz they will see this as you being disrespectful to ... (read in full...)
Married 5 years, still virgins, help!
Q. This year I will celebrate my 5 year wedding anniversary. Unfortunately, my wife and I are still virgins. I love her with all of my heart. People that know us think we have the most wonderful, romantic relationship. Love letters every morning before ...
A. 29 January 2011: hi
if a couple BOTH don't want a sexual relationship with each other that is fine BUT as you and maybe she doesn't THIS IS A HUGE PROBLEM.
she is a homemaker but leaves 95% of the housework for you to do??? what on earth is she doing all da... (read in full...)
I messed around with two women...now I want the second one who loved me but I ended up hurting...
Q. Before anyone starts throwing rocks at me pls hold off and hear me out. I fell in love with 2 different women (woman A and woman B). I fell in love with woman A first and boy did I fall hard. The complication was she wanted an open relations...
A. 29 January 2011: hi
not gonna throw rocks at you! ;)
woman A wanted someone else, hurt you, and then ended up wanting you back (did she ever tell you why she had this change of heart? is it because she found out about woman B?)
in turn you did exactly the came... (read in full...)
"You can tell how people will have sex by the way they dance", and my husband said I am a terrible dancer.
Q. Recently my husband and I have been having issues. He completely ignores me and only has mean things to say to me when he speaks unless we are doing ok. He does not talk things out to work them out with me. I let him throw his fit for a few days, me ...
A. 29 January 2011: hi
the difficulty with these posts is that we only have your side of the story, but from what you say he sounds nasty, immature, doesn't want to make the effort any more, is irritated by you and makes you feel like you are having to placate him ... (read in full...)
I hit my girlfriend, is it my fault or hers?
Q. im 15 ma girlfriends 14 were in the same year but im not proud of what i did but i need some advice me and my girlfriend were arguing after something that happened at school i kinda said she was flirting with my bestmate because she was hugging him ...
A. 29 January 2011: hi
definitely your fault and you need to learn how to WALK AWAY when someone is winding you up. do not let hitting women become a habit. i do not believe it was a split second thing; you were angry coz you were jealous and then you both cont... (read in full...)
Help with gf's violent ex partner
Q. Please help, my “GF” has come out of a very violent relationship of 8 years after a particularly bad beating from her ex-partner (the bruises were awful) she decided to leave him me and her have been getting on well for a long time as friends she ...
A. 29 January 2011: oh dear! that's a predicament isn't it? are you being honest when you say she left her bag open or was you having a bit of a snoop?
is she leading you into thinking that you and her are going to have a happy ever after, you're the one etc etc ... (read in full...)
Just need advice on how to lose the weight and tone up and also how to get rid of stretch marks.
Q. I'm 17 and about 5ft. I've wrote on here about my weight and everything but I need some advice of diets and losing weight. When I was 14 I weighed just over 7 stone and then put a bit of weight on when I was 16 so I was nearly 8 stone. I didn't p...
A. 29 January 2011: hi
the stretch marks will fade to a pale colour when your body and skin shrink back down to size. you are young so your skin should respond well (it has elasticity)
to lose weight - cut out all the obviously naughty foods (cake, cookies, cri... (read in full...)
My best friend hads lung cancer at 27 and she is pregnant
Q. ok. i am fourteen and my best friend is twentyseven. i meet her because i babysit her two year old daughter. she is like my sister.ive known her for two years. she just found out she is pregnant.she also just found out she has lung cancer.i am so ...
A. 28 January 2011: hi
what a terrible story :( my best friend has cancer too, treatment seems to be going well but with cancer you just never know, it is a disease that fights the sufferer as hard as they are fighting the cancer.
a pregnancy will complicate m... (read in full...)
I cheated and my boyfriend ended things
Q. Hello, right now i feel like shit,i have been a bit bad and cheated the odd time. Its lead to break up after break up,he wont let it drop. I have never admitted it as he will end it,i know he wont come back if i do. He turned off his phone last ...
A. 28 January 2011: hi
yeah he could be lying about being with someone, just to hurt you but you can't blame him really can you? you cheated and it hurt him. doesn't seem like he will ever trust you again. i hope this nasty tasting medicine will cure you from trea... (read in full...)
If my boyfriend had intentions to cheat with an old hookup, would he tell me whenever she contacted him?
Q. I just have a quick question. I've been with my boyfriend for 6 months and we love each other very much. Recently, a girl he has hooked up with in the past has been trying to get back with him. He tells her no, but I guess she's just desperate. M...
A. 28 January 2011: hi
he doesn't have to tell you that she contacts him, he could be faithful but still have not say anything about it. he maybe looking for 'brownie points'- like my ex wants me back, but aren't i a good boy not going with her?? see i'm really into... (read in full...)
Will I be unable to satisfy women
Q. My Business is 6" long exactly and around 5 and a quarter around. I understand that this is safely within the average, but don't know how acceptable this is for women. A cursory Google search of penile size preference revealed a poll, http://w...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
in my opinion (for what its worth!)this is not a small dick. i think your self confidence could do with being a bit bigger though! you are worrying about something that may NEVER happen. what would you say to your girlfriend if she said to y... (read in full...)
My 19 year old boyfriend wet the bed! Why?
Q. PLEASE TELL ME WHATS WRONG! Me and my boyfriend are sort of living together for like 2 months. And he has an early shift so he gets up 06:00AM. (we sleep together). He woke me up and told me that he peed the bed! AND HE IS 19! HE seemed really f...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
had he been drinking alcohol to excess that night? maybe he just was in a very deep sleep that night and couldn't wake up when he needed a wee. if it starts to happen regularly ask him to see a doctor just to get some tests done, to check ther... (read in full...)
One month into this LDR and he wants to move in together, marriage, babies....the lot! Should I run away as fast as I can?
Q. Hi. I am in a LDR with someone I've only known for a month. Never met and ended up talking over the internet on my web page. I have been trying to avoid relationships at any cost because I was engaged back in October but I broke it off with my ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
no absolutely don't get involved any further with this man, he sounds like a tool. he is either wanting to get married to you coz he is looking for sex/money/somewhere to live or because he is some kind of idiot who thinks marriage and babi... (read in full...)
My friend doesn't want to know me anymore despite everything I did for him!
Q. my good friend has suddenly decided he doesnt want to know me. i helped him with everything last year with his homelife and work exams. now hes joined a new team hes gone distant and boast how great it is and how much work he gets-a lot different to ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
he sounds like he is a bit wrapped up in his new stuff, probably not even noticing his behaviour is upsetting you. maybe you should just keep your distance from him a bit and when he gets down out of his own a*s* he can catch up with how YOU'... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I can marry her now I know about her past!
Q. I have been with this woman for 10 months now, i recently even got engaged with this women, at first she did tell me that she was seeing women when her mental health was not fine, recently i proposed marriage to her and moved in with her, since ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
you seem to have got engaged to this woman without knowing her well enough, you are now finding out things about her past and it looks like she has got very different sexual preferences than you have. i can't see a marriage working when your... (read in full...)
Was it a good idea to let him go as a friend?
Q. My best mate treats me like crap..ive tried so hard for my mate and my boyfriend to be friends so i can have both the people i love around me and i want to spend time with him and my boyfriend at the same time ..but hes just being so stubborn..he ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
this guy might have been your friend once, but now unfortunately he has developed feelings for you and is jealous that you have a boyfriend, he is doing all he can to make you feel awkward being stuck in the middle of your BF and him. he is m... (read in full...)
Should I forgive my girl friend for being ungrateful?
Q. I want a break from my Girlfriend because she returned a gift I bought for her. I love her and have been with her for 4 years, This is the first terrible thing she ever done to me! Must I forgive her? She returned a cellphone and wanted a blackbe...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
i think you should tell her that you are upset, hopefully she will say sorry and explain her reasons for wanting to swap the phone and then you can hopefully forgive her. if she has been good to you up until now it would be silly to break up o... (read in full...)
I need advice to cope with my sexting obsessed boyfriend. How have others coped with this problem?
Q. I need help. My boyfriend is obsessed with sexting other girls. I have caught him twice doing it with the same girl. He swears that nothing is going on between them, but I find it hard to believe. When I confront him about it he just keeps sayi...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
it doesn't matter if you are having lots of sex, this is something entirely separate for him. if he truly believes he has got a problem, then HE will have to go and get help for it. by all means, help him to arrange the help. maybe he is just... (read in full...)
He's abusive, but I don't know how to live without him. What should I do?
Q. Im in 2 relationship for the past 4 years. My boyfriend beats me up. I've lost all my friends for him.now I have no one to tell me what to do. Every1, including his friends have told me to move on and I also tried. I tried getting into another ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
he has got you weak so he has got you convinced you need him. you don't need him. you have got caring friends, you are not alone.
when you say you can't live without him - can you tell us the reasons for this? if he is so abusive and violent,... (read in full...)
Help with gf's violent ex partner
Q. Please help, my “GF” has come out of a very violent relationship of 8 years after a particularly bad beating from her ex-partner (the bruises were awful) she decided to leave him me and her have been getting on well for a long time as friends she ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
this man has not only battered her physically he has battered her emotions too, its not surprising that contact from him makes her retreat into a shell again. just give her what she needs in order to feel better at these times, even if that... (read in full...)
His kids are always sick!
Q. I am currently pregnant and expecting my first child with a man who has 3 children from a previous relationship. His children come over and visit every 2nd weekend. One of his kids is ALWAYS sick though... Ever since I first met her she either has a ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
regarding the girl who is always ill with colds: how old is she? i mean has she been getting colds since starting nursery or school? often when a child starts school they seem to pick up lots of coughs and colds coz they are amongst new kids... (read in full...)
Sex hungry boyfriend has got me wondering if I want to marry him!
Q. Hi, i been seeing a guy in the military for a few months an by saying a few i mean 7 so its still new.. at first we where close.. like couldn't go a day with out talking to him ... well he just got orders to germany about 2 months ago.. an i was ...
A. 27 January 2011: i think it is a good idea to wait too, give it WAY more time before you even think about marriage, there doesn't have to be any rush does there? so use this next year to get to know him. have you told him that you are not happy with so much sex and ... (read in full...)
Can I get my girlfriend to "sext" me?
Q. Hello. So I joked with my girlfriend while texting the other day about sending me some pics, and she told me that's something she was just not comfortable with. I dropped the subject. I understand her concern for it, and will not press her into i...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
you love her now and won't show the pictures but she has no guarantee that you will always feel this way, so she doesn't want to send you pics. that is fair enough. accept it.
and what if your phone gets lost or stolen??
in the future you... (read in full...)
Boyfriend claims he love me. So why does he sleep around?
Q. If my boyfriend says he loves me, then why does he engage in casual sex with others? ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
its coz he SAYS he loves you. its just a word. a great word when its true, but unfortunately that ain't always the case.
judge him by what he does rather than what he says.
do you therefore BELIEVE he loves you?
maybe he does love yo... (read in full...)
How to make my ex jealous?
Q. i want to make my ex as jealous as possible. he really broke my heart. we ended it "mutually" but it was more him wanting to end it than me. i want to make him regret breaking up with me. we dated for a year, and we're both 15. he was the first guy ...
A. 27 January 2011: hi
bad idea. its not fair on the guys that you will use just to make him jealous and if it looks obvious to people that you are just putting on a show to get him jealous you will look childish and get a reputation as being a b!tch and other guys... (read in full...)
How do you move on from past relationships?
Q. This might be a stupid question, but: how do you stop feeling bothered about stuff from the past? When I think of my relationship with my ex-boyfriend [who broke up with me months ago], I still feel bothered by things.. I won't bore everyone with ...
A. 26 January 2011: hi
the past does matter, coz you can learn from it. any thought/feeling we have can not just be forgotten, especially the very good ones or the very bad.
in time, the hurtful things will hurt less, but they are a lesson. you might find you hol... (read in full...)
Sex hungry boyfriend has got me wondering if I want to marry him!
Q. Hi, i been seeing a guy in the military for a few months an by saying a few i mean 7 so its still new.. at first we where close.. like couldn't go a day with out talking to him ... well he just got orders to germany about 2 months ago.. an i was ...
A. 26 January 2011: hi
your boyfriend sounds like an adolescent (wanting sex all the time and not having the maturity to keep stuff you tell him to himself) BUT he must have been like this since you met him? he hasn't suddenly just changed surely?
have you ... (read in full...)
Why is he ignoring me?
Q. Why is he ignoring me?? We have been together for nine months and we get on very well and I love him lots and Im sure he loves me lots too!! well he says he does!! The last few weeks he has been dropping me for his friends and not really been ...
A. 26 January 2011: hi
i'm sorry to say, yes it does sound as if he wants to break up. if he wanted this relationship to continue he wouldn't chance treating you like this, in case it made you break up with him! love is just a word, its the best one in the world when... (read in full...)
Why did you even ask?
Q. What brought you to Dear Cupid? Most likely it's because of some problem in your life or relationship. That's how most of us stumbled upon this place. You came here hoping that these anon people on the internet could offer you some insight into ...
A. 26 January 2011: hi dirtball
i'm getting a bit disheartened with this site at the moment, so for the past few days i have just been catching up with follow ups, not getting involved with new questions.
"sometimes, the best medicine is the one that doesn't tast... (read in full...)
How can I get out of this dark place???
Q. For just over 4 years I was single. 100% single, no flings, no one night pulls, nothing. But in my 2nd year of uni I met someone from out of uni, and we started seing eachother, but i never wanted to make it official because of a previous ...
A. 23 January 2011: hi
you have unfortunately met a player and him being the next man you put any trust in after your nasty ex, i understand how you feel. all you can do is keep telling yourself that the way these men treated you was NOT your fault. you were nice... (read in full...)
I do not wish to attend my mother in law's funeral if husband's "Friend" will be there
Q. Very long and involved post so thank you very much in advance for reading. I have been married for a year but for various reasons my husband and I do not live together. This is mainly because I have a house from my previous marriage that my...
A. 22 January 2011: if her husband and kids go too is even better, she wouldn't 'throw herself' at your husband if hers is there surely?
i think you you at least offer to go to the funeral, for your husbands sake, don't just wait for him to ask you. if you make no ... (read in full...)
I do not wish to attend my mother in law's funeral if husband's "Friend" will be there
Q. Very long and involved post so thank you very much in advance for reading. I have been married for a year but for various reasons my husband and I do not live together. This is mainly because I have a house from my previous marriage that my...
A. 21 January 2011: hi
firstly, he is either still interested in her or he is too WEAK to tell her to sling her hook. he should NOT accepting drunken calls off her while she talks about the sex life they used to have!
now, regarding the funeral. you won't be abl... (read in full...)
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