| Latest articles: About Facebook and relationships
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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What do you do with your hands whilst kissing?
Q. where do guys like a girls hands to be while they're kissing ? ...
A. 2 May 2010: A lot love when you run your fingers through their hair. It tingles sometimes. You can start by just holding onto their shoulders and pulling them close, rubbing their back a bit. Don't just leave them at your sides though! Good luck.... (read in full...)
Movies without being porn that will turn a couple on?
Q. What are some movies for you and your boyfriend to watch that will turn you both on? Something that will give him ideas and make him want to do with you. But not any porn movies. Thanx...
A. 1 May 2010: Why not just get softcore porn? It's not all kinky and male themed if that's what you're worried about. I couldn't say about mainstream movies.... (read in full...)
How can I stop my boyfriend from being so scared of sex toys?
Q. Hi, My bf is scared of sex toys... He says he feels intimidated by them, and that he has had a couple of women tell him hes dumped they bought a dildo and showed him the door, one of these girls (i used to know her and she wasnt terribly freindl...
A. 1 May 2010: Well first off, if he's scared of being replaced by a sex toy, waving around/using an enormous dildo is going to make it worse. I think any girl using a dildo on herself while a guy is around is being slightly insensitive. I feel there's a strong ... (read in full...)
Why did he have to make himself cum? Am I doing something wrong?
Q. hello i have a important question well it is 2 me lol Ive been kindof seeing this guy on and off for about 6 months we are not in a relationship but oftern sleep together so kinda guess if fuck buddies really Anyway hears my problam, after...
A. 1 May 2010: A lot of times this just means the guy masturbates so much that a vagina or mouth is no match for his hand's grip. I would say talk to him about it, but since you're only friends with benefits, it probably means you have no grounds to ask him to ... (read in full...)
I just can't measure up to the vibrator.
Q. My MASSIVE problem, someone please....help me. Part 1 : In the beginning.... I have been with this woman for over a year and a half and during this time we have had sex many times. At first everything was great although I was never sure if I e...
A. 1 May 2010: I think this is a side-effect of living in the porn-era. Men see women getting penetrated and squirting and screaming and having mind blowing orgasms, when in reality only 25% of women can orgasm through intercourse alone and it's just because they ... (read in full...)
I am uncomfortable with my boyfriend watching porn. How can I get past it?
Q. i am uncomfortable with my boyfriend watching porn. i have self image problems and am not comfortable with him looking at women who seem perfect. i would like to get past my discomfort what can I do?...
A. 30 April 2010: You should be able to simply talk to him about it. Don't get angry though, whatever you do, because then he may feel tempted to start lying about it. It's not abnormal to feel threatened or cheated on by your boyfriend watching porn. I'd say many ... (read in full...)
Am I still a virgin? Could I be pregnant?
Q. I'm 15 years old, female, and I think still a virgin. My boyfriend and I we're fooling around today like we normally do, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd base all covered. We we're getting really into it and he got on top of me, I was wearing a skirt. He fingered ...
A. 30 April 2010: You would DEFINITELY feel it if he got his penis in you. Also, unless he ejaculated, you're not pregnant. Pre-cum very rarely contains any sperm. The only time it does is if the guy has cum since last urinating. And even when it does contain sperm, ... (read in full...)
I hate that I need "kinky" thoughts to achieve an orgasm!
Q. porn is so visual and kinky, the fact that its not you in the act makes it so much more kinky and orgasmic, its weird, the kinkier the better to orgasm to....i find it easier to masturbate to porn (watching men strip, women strip, gay porn.) I ...
A. 30 April 2010: Honestly, that's not that "kinky." It sounds like pretty soft porn to me. Also, are you sure you were addicted? Like was it interfering with your daily life and you found yourself making excuses about it? What you are describing doesn't sound like a ... (read in full...)
How soon after unprotected sex can you get tested for STD's?
Q. how long after having unprotected sex with someone you dont know too well should you get tested for std's...i know some std's come 3 months later like hiv but im so worried i want to get tested sooner than that! ...
A. 30 April 2010: Actually for HIV you're supposed to be tested 3, then 6, then one year. As for other common STDs, I believe gonorrhea, chlamydia, and others like it show up very quickly. Herpes and HPV are hard to test for until symptoms show up. You need to make ... (read in full...)
If I have not had sex for a long time, will doing it again feel like the first time?
Q. I haven't had sex for a long time now.When I do it again,is it going to feel like the first time?...
A. 30 April 2010: It might be a little tighter than the last time if it's been longer than 6 months, but probably not so long as you are turned on. The biggest thing that comes up is that after a long time without sex, even just a month or so, is that generally it's ... (read in full...)
What have peoples' experiences been with the implant?
Q. Hello everyone. I've had the implant done a month ago and I know the doctor has told me the advantages and disadvantages, but i'd like t know from someone else's point of view what it acctually does t you. Thanks...
A. 30 April 2010: The side effects of the implant are the same as with any other hormonal contraceptive. Some people tolerate them very well, while others do not. I would experiment first with something a little less long-term like the pill or nuvaring to see how you ... (read in full...)
Will she tell me she wants anal?
Q. Will women just come out and say what they want? My wife originally was anti-anal, wouldn't even let me get close. As time has gone on, things have progressed and it was first playing around the outside of her anus, then pinky penetration, then ...
A. 30 April 2010: A lot of women might find anal sex shameful or disgusting to ask for and just won't ask for it even if they wanted it. It still shocks me how people can be vulnerable enough to have sex with someone, lots of sex, and not be comfortable talking about ... (read in full...)
Why does my fiance have the desire to look at porn when we have a healthy sex life?
Q. I need a man's perspective on an issue. Me and my fiance have a healthy sex life. I, unlike some women, have a sex drive (I'm not a slut, I am very faithful to him). I try to keep things interesting in the bedroom and I never refuse him when ...
A. 30 April 2010: I think it's really healthy and good that he's telling you this. Porn truly can be addictive and the fact that he's owning up to the fact that he was addicted and is still tempted and such is a REALLY good sign for both of you. You should encourage ... (read in full...)
Why is he only showing interest after I gave up and settled for friendship?
Q. 6 months ago I gave up all hope of nabbing Mr.Married to his job/too busy for a relationship but recently it seems he has taken up more of a personal interest in my life. Who am I seeing? Any one catching my interest? Stating that I shouldn't date ...
A. 30 April 2010: This is why some women play hard to get, because men (and women) love the thrill of the chase. No guy wants a desperate girl. It's because suddenly you seem independent and unclingy, which is attractive to anyone.... (read in full...)
I swear she has had anal sex before.
Q. This is gonna sound like I'm some jealous macho American asshole, so sorry in advance. I am wondering there is any way to think if my girl has had anal sex before. I realize that I should trust her when she says no, and that love is built on trus...
A. 30 April 2010: It's not like breaking a hymen in that after you do it for the first time, she's going to automatically be loose. Everyone's "tightness" is different and for some women anal sex isn't even an issue while some women say it hurts so much they can't ... (read in full...)
Why won't he tell me about his female friend?
Q. This guy has confused me. We started off as friends. We get along really well together. He is the most caring man I ever met. Gradually, I felt I could see a possibility of a future with him. We are together almost like 24x7, except that we don't ...
A. 30 April 2010: Well two things are going on here. One, he calls you a friend. That means he doesn't see you as a girlfriend, and thus, dating another woman is not off limits. Two, it's extremely concerning that he would keep his female friends secret from you. It ... (read in full...)
Can an excess of water affect the pregnancy test?
Q. havent started my period this month. did a pregnancy test, came back negative. but, i had drank 2 bottles of water right before the test, because i was anxious to find out of the posibility of being pregnant. would it have any effect on the test? ...
A. 30 April 2010: Yes actually. Very diluted urine can actually cause a false negative or a positive so faint it's impossible to read. I know it makes you anxious to wait, but the absolute best time and really the only time you should take a pregnancy test is with ... (read in full...)
Lusting is wrong... or is it?
Q. Yeah, im a 16 year old kid and having some issues with myself, mostly to do with lust. I know that lust is wrong. When i used to lust it made me want to masturbate. When i did, it felt normal. When i fell in love for the first time i stopped because ...
A. 29 April 2010: There's nothing wrong with feeling lustful. It's a very normal thing. Everyone feels it, very often. Especially at your age, you will be feeling it a lot. Masturbation is also very normal, most people (men and women) do it and there's absolutely ... (read in full...)
We texed one another for over 5 hours! Does this mean he likes me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I like this guy and I told him but he said that he already talks to someone. I told him that I liked him over a text message and since then we've been texting. Does that mean that he likes me? We've once texed for over five hours, I n...
A. 25 April 2010: Yes, I think it does. If you told him you liked him and he kept texting instead of cutting himself off from you, I'm pretty sure that means he likes you. Just because he talks to someone doesn't mean he likes them or likes them more than you.... (read in full...)
I'm getting more and more anxious about sex
Q. Hey, I have been having sex with my boyfriend for about 10 months. We both haven't had any other sexual partners. When we try to have sex it still is very hard for him to get in, even if I am aroused and lubricated I still am tight, and there is one ...
A. 25 April 2010: I would advise going to see your gyno. He/she can tell you if something is wrong physically. It's probably also not helping that you go into it with a negative/anxious attitude. You think it will hurt, so you stay tense. Try buying lube rather than ... (read in full...)
Am I pregnant or did the pill mess up my cycle?
Q. My menstrual cycle for the past six months has been 28, 37, 32, 24, 25, 26, 26 days. This month, I had sex with my boyfriend on the 25th day and the condom slipped. He noticed it on time and pulled out of me and came all over himself. The condom was ...
A. 25 April 2010: Those morning after pills are most effective when taken as soon as possible. That said, they can really mess up your cycle for a month or so. I very highly doubt you're pregnant, but a pregnancy test isn't that expensive, so if you're nervous you ... (read in full...)
Male advice needed! Will my stretch marks put guys off?
Q. i am 16 and i have stretch marks on my upper legs and on my sides because i lost a lot of weight really fast when i was ill , now i am afraid that guys wont want to be with me because if this am i just over reacting ? (can i have male advise to ...
A. 25 April 2010: All women have some stretch marks! It's totally normal and no it won't put most guys off unless they are scumbags who have unrealistic expectations of women. Guys know that real women have stretch marks and cellulite and that those things are ... (read in full...)
He keeps receiving pictures of semi-naked girls and texting them but claims it is only "like porn"! Should I forgive him or will it happen again?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years now. After 3 months of going out i found pictures of other girls on his phone with no top on they had sent him. I also found very forward texting to one girl in particular who he was speaking to on msn , Sh...
A. 25 April 2010: Something is called a second chance because it is just that. A second chance. Not a third, fourth, or fifth chance. I know it hurts, but he will just continue to hurt you. This is not "like porn," this is like cheating. He's having sexual ... (read in full...)
I don't think about sex when I masturbate?
Q. First of all, sorry for the explicit nature of this question. I'm just wondering if anybody else feels the same way. I'm a virgin (female) and when I masturbate, I can't think about having sex or doing sexual things with another person. Well, I ...
A. 25 April 2010: Some people find masturbation to be more like a meditation than a sexual act. Like a wonderful amazing self-massage that relieves stress, cures headaches and cramps, and just makes you happier. You mention that thinking about guys you know feels ... (read in full...)
Could the bleeding be from a broken hymen?
Q. Okay Im a virgin I used a dildo today for the first time,. Afterwards I was bleedin and still kinda am , did i break the hymen ? please help thanks. x...
A. 25 April 2010: Yes, you probably broke your hymen. Dildos are made from molds of real penises. If a real penis can break a hymen, so can a dildo. Many girls break their hymen before they have sex for the first time. For next time, try using a little lube first so ... (read in full...)
Is love at first sight real or a myth?
Q. Is it possible to fall in love with someone literally as soon as you see them? I use Facebook as my main way of communication with my friends. My cousin changed his status and a friend of his commented on it. The comments between my cousin and the ...
A. 25 April 2010: This is called a crush. I don't know why people ever use the phrase "silly little crush" and then try to justify it away as love, not a crush. Anyone who has ever had a crush knows it's an IMMENSELY powerful feeling! Sometimes it's actually easier ... (read in full...)
Is it rude for two people to have sex while you're in the room?
Q. Does anybody else think it rude for two friends to have sex whilst your in the room! It made me uncomfortable, but, I perhaps I'm taking life too seriously or something. How would other people react? Btw it was a group if us sleeping at a mate...
A. 25 April 2010: Not only is it rude, it's disgusting and shows a pretty severe lack of boundaries on their part.... (read in full...)
Guys, how would you feel if your girlfriend dumped you?
Q. Guys this question is for you, how would you feel if your girlfriend dumped you, if you really loved her?...
A. 22 April 2010: I can't imagine it would be much different from if a guy dumped a girl who really loved him. I'd imagine from both sides it would be broken-hearted and utterly crushed.... (read in full...)
Two pregnancy tests say "negative" but I still wonder ....
Q. heya .. am an 18 year old who has been on the implant since middle of december, and i havnt been on my period since. a week ago i had a bit of brown stuff in my knickers just like you get when your just finishing a period and when i wipe my s...
A. 21 April 2010: Two negative tests probably mean you're not pregnant. Your mind is capable of doing some amazing things if you think you're sick or pregnant or something. The doctor will tell you for sure though. My gut feeling is that you're not pregnant, ... (read in full...)
Can they really not have sex in the morning if they 'have to pee'?
Q. Me and my boyfriend's sex life has been declining. We used to have sex at night about 5 times a week. Now we are down to one, maybe two nights a week. He is usually too tired to do it at night, so we have been having morning sex. Well the recent ...
A. 21 April 2010: Really they can't have sex if they have to pee or it's very difficult. Have him pee before sex and then jump him. However, it does sound like you have more problems than just that his bladder is full. It seems like even though yes, guys do get too ... (read in full...)
Two questions about cheating.
Q. Hey there y'all. I was wondering today, as you do, about relationships. I have two questions really: 1. Why do people cheat on the people whom they claim , and possibly do, love with their whole heart. 2. Is it possible to have a rela...
A. 16 April 2010: 1. There are so many possibilities ranging from, habit to needs not being met to being insecure and needing an ego boost etc... 2. The porn issue is up to the individual. Porn is pretty common in relationships, though many women and some men hav... (read in full...)
I woke up to see my boyfriend feeling up my sister!
Q. One nite me my boyfriend of six months and my step sister drank, I could feel something wrong, later that nite we went back to our house watched a movie n I fell asleep, then I woke up to find my my boyfriend feeling up my sister right over me, I ...
A. 16 April 2010: I'd say if you still love him and think you can get past it, give him a second chance. People do make mistakes. And he was drunk. If this is his first infidelity then it could honestly have just been he was very drunk and truly is sorry and really ... (read in full...)
Is this a normal period?
Q. Okay, im only 13 and ive had my period for almost a year but its not regular. Every day i have dischage in my underwear. Its either clear white o yellow.. is that bad? should i go see a doctor? it really bothers me and i change a lot because of it. ...
A. 15 April 2010: No that's perfectly normal. If there's a lot of it you can wear thin pantyliners to keep from feeling gross. It's only abnormal if it smells very bad, the area feels itchy and/or burns, or the discharge is a strange color or texture (cottage cheesy, ... (read in full...)
Can't climax during sex. Could it be the porn and masturbation?
Q. Does too much masturbation effect your performance when having sex? I can't seem to climax during sex- I think it's because I masturbate too much to porn....
A. 15 April 2010: Yes masturbation and porn can actually impede your ability to orgasm from sex. Your hand can provide a lot more friction and pressure than a vagina or mouth can and if you get really used to it something soft just won't do it for you. As for the ... (read in full...)
Dreaming of a grade school crush
Q. Hey I'm 21 and I keep having dreams about my sixth grade crush. I have a bf we've ben dating for over a year and I love him yet I can't stop thinking about my grade school crush. To top it all off I bumped into him a couple months ago and well I had ...
A. 19 March 2010: I think just about everyone has lusted after a previous crush or ex or something at some point in their relationship, especially if the relationship has gotten very comfortable. Just because you're having dreams about him doesn't mean you even want ... (read in full...)
I worry my penis wont measure up
Q. i just wanted 2 ask any girls out there that have had a guy or more in the past that had a gigantic dick, what happens in the future when u find someone u fall in love with that just has a 6 or 7 incher? does it mean that since u already had ...
A. 7 March 2010: Anything more than about 6 or 7 inches and we enter the extremely uncomfortable painful "cervix boxing" realm. Guys with huge dicks usually wind up acting like huge dicks too, at least in bed. Like what Emilyanswers said, they think because they ... (read in full...)
Can I get pregnant if I've never had a period?
Q. ok i am 24yrs old and i never in my life had a period. yea i know weird, but recently my bf and i had sex and for this whole week i have been feeling nasuaded. Now my question is can i still get preganat without having a monthly cycle?...
A. 5 March 2010: I'd be more concerned that you haven't had a period yet than that you're pregnant. There could be a hormonal imbalance and you should definitely go have this checked out. Yes, it could be a sign of infertility as well. It's unlikely you're pregnant, ... (read in full...)
We have sex about once every 2 months! What do I do?
Q. Where did my wife go? You could say my life is very typical, to an extreme! Before we got married, my wife did everything, unprovoked. I NEVER pushed sex on her at all. She went down on me in the back of a cab once, I never even asked or fl...
A. 2 March 2010: Making time for sex after a baby is born is a very common problem for women. Although it seems like she's being selfish, it's just a natural instinct of reorganizing priorities happening. That said, it's not a good thing. It can be hard, I know, to ... (read in full...)
Shaving bumps becoming bothersome.
Q. Okay this is pretty personal but I just wanna know. I shave down there and after eveytime I get those red bumps and they bother me. I just wanted to know if I'm the only one getting them or if there is any way I can prevent them or how I can treat ...
A. 2 March 2010: These are pretty common. Some things you can do, exfoliate thoroughly before shaving. Make sure to use a very sharp razor with at least 3 blades. Move the razor very slowly. I find it works best to shave diagonally or perpendicular to hair growth ... (read in full...)
Do guys feel it when a girl orgasms?
Q. Do guys feel it when a girl orgasms? Do they feel the contractions, or anything else? Since I'm not a guy, I've wanted to know the answer to this for a long time. ...
A. 2 March 2010: It varies from girl to girl and guy to guy and it depends on whether or not he's wearing a condom. If he's not he's more likely to feel it. Also, some girls orgasm through very strong vaginal contractions while others barely contract at all. I know ... (read in full...)
The guy I like was upset when he saw his friend feeling me up! What should I do now?
Q. Okay so last night I went to the local bar in the area of the city that i live in. Afterwards my friend and I went back to the guy I like's (he likes me in return)house with his friends as well. Needless to say i was quite drunk and flirty with the ...
A. 31 January 2010: Hmm well you could just tell the guy you like him, and explain what happened. That's really creepy that the guy was feeling you up without your permission, that's borderline sexual assault. I think that could legally actually BE sexual assault.... (read in full...)
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