| Latest articles: About Facebook and relationships
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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Why do most men like big boobs so much?
Q. Why do most men (especially guys my age...) like big boobs so much? As I see it, it's just extra fat! And last time I checked, for men, too much fat is bad. I have small breasts and feel so inadequate. Breasts are so "out there" (unlike a penis ...
A. 13 June 2010: "Guys don't dig that. That's like an Ancient Greek ideal of beauty."
If you're the ancient greek ideal of beauty, then why are you upset? My guy tells me I look like the Venus de Milo and do you think that was upsetting? Heck no. That statue h... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says if we have a baby he will settle down with me and stop hanging out on the streets, what should I do?
Q. hi i'm 17 and my boyfriend is 18 and wants to have a baby but he is alway out in the streets he say's if we have a baby he will settle down with me. What should i do?...
A. 8 June 2010: 1. When men try to "exchange" something for the woman having a baby, he is trying to control her. In this case, he's trying to promise he'll stop hanging out on the streets if you have a baby. What do those things have to do with each other at all? ... (read in full...)
I don't want to end the relationship but I want him to stop being mean and texting other girls!
Q. hey there i have quite the problem and i have no clue what to do about it...my bf well hes a jack ass but he can be so sweet too... two weekends ago i found out the three times during our relationship he texted a girl he had sex with before dating ...
A. 8 June 2010: I agree, this guy sounds like a jerk and a player. Just because he can be nice to you sometimes doesn't mean he's actually a nice person. He talks dirty with other girls, which is cheating in some people's books, and he's only nice to you when he ... (read in full...)
I met mr. right at the wrong time! Are we holding each other back?
Q. Has anyone here felt like they met the right person at the wrong time? I have been with my boyfriend since highschool and he was my first everything. We are now in our 20's and i feel as though he would be perfect to spend the rest of my life with ...
A. 8 June 2010: I think that if things are going great with you guys you'll regret it more if you break up. It's a grass is greener situation. Yeah dating can have it's ups, like a giddyness sort of thing, it's exciting, but it can also have its downs. Bad dates, ... (read in full...)
He went MIA while overseas, and I thought he could be dead! Why does he joke about it?
Q. I'm in a long distance relationship with this guy I've yet to meet but we're both in love with each other. He's in the military and is overseas right now and I havent been able to talk to him as much as i used to before he left. This morning I got a ...
A. 8 June 2010: Maybe he is feeling terrified/traumatized and joking around is his way of coping? Don't get angry at him for it, he's in a scary situation and just trying to deal with it.... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is making me feel inadequate.
Q. dear agony aunt my girlfriend keeps perving on other men especially rugby players. i'm no rugby player as i'm currently holding on to a few extra pounds from christmas. i now feel completely inadequate and even fatter, my only way to deal with thi...
A. 8 June 2010: Why not try working out instead of eating more? And when you say perving, what specifically do you mean? Flirting, or admiring, or what? You should talk to her about it and let her know it makes you feel bad.... (read in full...)
Is it ok to cheat if he isn't satisfying me sexually.
Q. Is it ok to cheat if he isn't satisfying me sexually. I love him but we don't have sparks. but I am settling because we have a baby together and I'm 19 he is 25 and he knows I am settling but he is so in love with me he is ok with it. I want to have ...
A. 8 June 2010: No. It's not OK at all. Why would you think it's OK? It's not fair for either of you to "settle" just because a baby is involved. Why not try to fix your love life instead of taking the easy way out? Try adding in sex toys and playing out fantasies. ... (read in full...)
Am I experincing a female orgasm? Females only please!
Q. I have/had never had a vaginal orgasm before with my last boyfriend. However, I have this new boyfriend and every time we have sex and im on top my vagina starts making a weird noise thats not queefing (I know what that feels and sounds like), this ...
A. 8 June 2010: Vaginal versus clitoral orgasms are actually the same thing. There is no difference. Many of the women who have vaginal orgasms are either getting their G-spot hit and their clitoris rubbed during sex and that is why they have orgasms. It sounds ... (read in full...)
What does this phrase "get with" mean?
Q. hello just a quick questions. What you you define "get with" to mean? As in "it doesnt mean i cant get with girls" Does it mean sex.... or just messing round and hanging out kissing etc. I always thought it didnt mean sex but i wanna be ce...
A. 8 June 2010: It generally means sex, but some people (especially younger ones) can mean making out with.... (read in full...)
My man wants me to be okay with him cheating on me.
Q. My boyfriend and i have been in a long distnce relationship for almost 2 years now. We hardly get to see each other. And we both get up set at each other for that. Recently he told me he has another girlfriend just to occupy until we move in ...
A. 8 June 2010: I'm sorry but this isn't about you fighting for what's yours. He's chosen another girl over you. Regardless of whether they've had sex, he is cheating. Furthermore, he thinks it's fine! You should get out if you don't want to be a third wheel to his ... (read in full...)
Should I write to my ex to find closure?
Q. I'm so confused and hurt... A long time ago, about 4 years ago, I met an amazing man. I was 16 and he was 18. He was my first and really true love. I would have died for him a thousand times over. He went into the military, and we began havin...
A. 8 June 2010: That is just horrible that he would break up with you because you got raped. I don't think you'll get him back, and if you're aiming to write that letter to get him back, it's not going to work. Furthermore, you don't want to be with someone who ... (read in full...)
He's away on holiday and I feel he doesn't care for me any more... help!
Q. I posted previously about my bf going away on his lads holiday and that I wasn't sure if I could trust him. Its all getting on top of me now. He kissed a girl on holiday a few years ago while we were together which always springs to mind whenever...
A. 8 June 2010: I don't think you sound crazy. I know you came here for reassurance, but I think you do have right to be concerned. He has shown no reason that he would behave differently on this trip, has he? He's misbehaved twice while on holiday before, and once ... (read in full...)
I dreamt he gave me a ring... what does this dream signify?
Q. I know a guy who I have a crush on. I can tell he has feelings for me. I dreamt that he gave me a ring. It did not feel like a wedding ring. Can someone tell me what this dream means as it is really frustrating me. thanks...
A. 8 June 2010: It means at some point right before falling asleep you thought of a ring and at some other point you thought of him. Dreams mean nothing more than you briefly, as you were drifting off to sleep, thought of the thing or something relating to it.... (read in full...)
Forgot my pill, what should I do?
Q. This is just an enquiry - basically I'm on the pill and have been for a few years now - I forgot to take the pill after a night out and it slipped my mind as I was on my period shortly after. Now when I finished me and my boyfriend had an accident ...
A. 7 June 2010: You absolutely cannot take the morning after pill while on birth control pills, you will make yourself sick and overload your system with hormones. There's nothing more you can do other than wait it out and keep taking the pills as normal. I would ... (read in full...)
How do I win my girlfiend back after drunken kiss with another woman?
Q. I need to know how to get my girlfriend back after I drunkenly kissed another girl at a bar. I didn't call this girl, didn't text this girl, didn't even know this girl. I got extremely drunk and acted like a total idiot and lost my girlfriend's ...
A. 7 June 2010: I agree that her consciously going out and sleeping with someone to spite you is very very different from you getting drunk and kissing a stranger and would only serve to destroy any hope you had of getting back together. You're doing the right ... (read in full...)
Did he join a dating site, or is it just spam?
Q. If your man checks out an online dating website, can they get your email address or addresses without joining this site as a member? My guys says he is just getting spam from this website. But he is getting 5-6 emails a day from this site. I ...
A. 7 June 2010: It's possible that it's just spam, as those websites do love to advertise. However, 5-6 a day seems excessive. You should snoop around a bit more to find out the nature of these emails. It should be pretty easy to tell if they are spam "come join ... (read in full...)
How can I talk some sense into my friend? She is having sex but not using protection!
Q. Right well this question concerns my friend, not myself (And I'm not just saying that.) My friend is the same age of me (15) and has recently started having sex with her boyfriend (Whose the same age) but she says she's too embarresed to buy cond...
A. 7 June 2010: The withdrawal method works well with people with great self-control. Last I checked, 15 year old boys do not have great self-control, especially when it comes to sex. Why not buy her some condoms and stuff them in her bag or something? Or leave her ... (read in full...)
He slept with his ex and now she is pregnant, I am so hurt and confused!
Q. my boyfriend slept with his ex who he cant stand while i was pregnant with his baby and now she is pregnant. he said its not his and i got to get over it but i cant. he said he was confused as we were having problems but i cant get past it. i told ...
A. 7 June 2010: I'm sorry you're going through this. Any guy who sleeps with an ex and tells you to get over it isn't taking the situation very seriously. I'm not sure what you can do at this point, but you'll have to decide whether you can live with this or not. ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to get pregnant after 14 days of my period?
Q. it's possible for me to get pregnant after 14 days of my period?...
A. 7 June 2010: If you mean you've had your period for 14 days, you should go to a doctor. If you mean 14 days after your period started or ended, than there's a good chance.... (read in full...)
How long after your first Depo Provera injection did you wait to begin intercourse?
Q. Ladies: Just had my first injection of birth control Depo Provera a few days ago. I'm still a virgin, but I'm curious as to how long it usually takes the shot to "kick in" so to speak. For those of you with experience with Depo Provera, how lon...
A. 7 June 2010: With pill forms of the hormone it takes 7 days to be effective, but if you take it the first day of your period it's effective immediately. According to webmd, the shot is effective immediately if given within 5 days of starting your period, meaning ... (read in full...)
Are there any men in their early 20's who know for a fact they would not cheat on their partners?
Q. Are there any men in their early 20's here that know for a fact you would never cheat on your signifiacant other? How do you know you would never? Do you try to stay out of situations where you may be tempted? (Like going to bars stc without your ...
A. 7 June 2010: I'm not a man in my early twenties, but I can say that being a man in your early twenties does not make you a cheater just because the temptation is there. There are the nice guys out there who have stronger willpower than that, I'd say probably the ... (read in full...)
We both dreamt we cheated! Does it mean anything?
Q. this is the third time ive had a dream about my boyfriend cheating on me and i told him about it and he said that last night he also had a dream and it was that him and his cousins were at hotel and he called me to come and one of his cousins was a ...
A. 7 June 2010: Generally dreams are loosely connected to things you think about right as you're falling asleep, whether or not you remember thinking them. About 6 months back I was having persistent dreams about cheating on my boyfriend. We're still together and ... (read in full...)
Is it strange for someone my age to have no experience and not be on the pill?
Q. I feel like there is something wrong with me, I am really embarrassed by sex and get shy talking about it so much so that I have always ignored the fact. I have been tryng to face my shyness and have started fooling around with guy eg kissing,...
A. 7 June 2010: You should use a condom at first to avoid STD's. You don't have to ask for them and I'm sure the guy you're seeing would be happy to go pick them up. The pill should only be used in a long-term committed relationship, like chigirl said. Most single ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with him or go have fun?
Q. Ok so, I've had boyfriend for a year and 3 months now and we never have any problems just a couple small arguments, you know normal stuff... but the problem is lately I have been feeling just kind of like I wish I was single. My friends have been ...
A. 7 June 2010: Why don't you bring your boyfriend along with you when you go out with friends? Or devote some more time to your friends? You aren't required to spend every minute of free time with your boyfriend. You're still very young. Have fun. If you don't, ... (read in full...)
NO BC pills..should I just use condom and take morning after pill too?
Q. Hi, I need some advice my boyfriend is going to Afghanistan at the end of this month, we have been going out for while but haven't had sex yet, we have decided to have sex before he leaves. The advice I need is that I am currently not on...
A. 6 June 2010: You don't need both forms of protection, a condom, so long as it is used properly, is fine. It's not strange to not be on the pill at any age. A lot of women don't like the pill. Condoms are a lot more effective than people make them out to be. You ... (read in full...)
Husband cheating says he gets sucked in by the internet
Q. We have been married 33 years-happily I thought. Last week I discoverded my husband had been chatting online and on a webcam to women. Mostly ordinary stuff but also talk of kissing and brushing hair, etc but not sex. He said it was for friendship. ...
A. 6 June 2010: Internet addiction is becoming a growing problem among marriages these days. People truly become so sucked in to the internet that they have trouble interacting with real people both sexually and emotionally. Because he admitted he has a problem and ... (read in full...)
Why do most men like big boobs so much?
Q. Why do most men (especially guys my age...) like big boobs so much? As I see it, it's just extra fat! And last time I checked, for men, too much fat is bad. I have small breasts and feel so inadequate. Breasts are so "out there" (unlike a penis ...
A. 5 June 2010: It seems like an American thing for men to prefer larger breasts. We are trained on what we should find attractive from a young age, this has always happened. It's not a societal problem, it's just how we are. Long ago men looked for signs of ... (read in full...)
He says nothing's going on but won't let me read his emails!
Q. should I be concerned if my boyfriend of 12 years will not let me see his emails? I just recently found out he was telephoning and emailing a female coworker and as he admitted became "too close to her". He insist nothing is going on, but when I ask ...
A. 5 June 2010: I agree, it does sound suspicious. It doesn't necessarily mean something is going though, he could just be a very private person. Has he ever let you read his emails or look through his private life before? If yes, then there's something going on. ... (read in full...)
Will my boyfriend cheat on me or am I just paranoid?
Q. Okay so I'm going to be a senior in high school while my boyfriend is heading off to college. We've been dating for a little over a year and everything has been great overall. I know people may say we're young, but it truly does seem as if we're ...
A. 4 June 2010: I'll be honest with you, most of the time when one person goes to college and the other stays behind the relationship doesn't work. However, it does sometimes work and you have the benefit of being able to see each other frequently (since he's only ... (read in full...)
How can you get over the feeling of being lied to from your boyfriend about his porn watching habits?
Q. How can you get over the feeling of being lied to from your boyfriend about his porn watching habits? I've been obsessing over this for the past few days. I almost left him for me being suspicious of him lying after finding sketchy files on his c...
A. 4 June 2010: No all guys aren't going to be like that. It's really horrible for him to lie to you, regardless of what it's about. PM had some really good advice, that you need to sit down and try to make him understand how it makes you feel when he lies and that ... (read in full...)
What if my boyfriend wants a vasectomy?
Q. My boyfriend doesn't want marriage or kids. I don't know what I want. I think I more want a fairy-tale relationship / marriage, not the realistic kind. Since he doesn't want either. because condoms bother him and are very desensitizing (yes eve...
A. 4 June 2010: If it's just as a form of birth control then it's a bad idea. It's permanent. Even supposedly reversible kinds can be non-reversible. You should never get a vasectomy with the intention of reversing it. Why not try the pill or an IUD if you want him ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to have an orgasm just from being tickled?
Q. Am I strange? My new boyfriend has a fetish for feet. A few weeks ago I indulged him for the first time and allowed him to tie me to my bed. He proceeded to tickle the bottoms of my feet for a long time. I’m a very ticklish person and I laugh...
A. 4 June 2010: Wow. Lucky girl. Some contortionists can stand on their heads, so I guess stranger things have happened. You found something you apparently really like, so explore it more and just enjoy it!... (read in full...)
Friends with benfits? Yes or no?
Q. Hey everybody, i was wondering what your opioion on friends with benfits is. I have a male friend to who i am sexually attracted to, he shares these feeling as well. We want to start a friend with benfits type of relationship that includes ...
A. 4 June 2010: A friend with benefits situation can only work when both people have no romantic feelings for each other. If you both want nothing but making out/sex with each other then it can work. But emotional feelings can make the fwb thing miserable. Often ... (read in full...)
Suspect boyfriend lying about porn/photos/etc...
Q. Real quick to begin in the past I was with a guy who was in my opinion addicted. He even was watching it while I was lying next to him asleep and would go to bathroom to relieve himself. Ever since then I've found it to be disgusting in a ...
A. 4 June 2010: I'm sorry, but unless someone else is using his computer he's lying. Especially with him saying "all guys do it" (the only ones who believe this are the recreational users) as well as writing off your problems as insecurity. If he really wasn't ... (read in full...)
I am worried that my boobs don't look normal!
Q. Hey everyone! :) Ok I'm a 17 year old girl and I'm very self conscious especially sonce I'm over weight! My boobs are kinda bigger compared to my friends and I know it's cuz I'm fat! But my nipples are really wierd! I don't know what its call...
A. 2 June 2010: Hi there. Your nipples are normal. Don't try to compare yourself to women in porn, they are photoshopped and edited. Some women's areolas (the dark area around their nipple) take up nearly the entire front of their boob. You're totally normal. Take ... (read in full...)
Is it relatively normal to be doing this in a relationship?
Q. I have a girlfriend that I love a lot and would never heat on her. I've never even thought about it or anything like that. I feel guilty now if I watch porn, or masturbate thinking of someone else. Should I be feeling guilty or is it still ...
A. 2 June 2010: It depends on whether she knows. If she knows and she's OK with it, then it's fine. If you hide it from her, then it's not. It's especially not OK if you lie about it. Lots of guys look at porn while in a relationship. But if you're feeling guilty ... (read in full...)
Is he commenting on other women to get a reaction out of me?
Q. tonight me and my boyfriend were watching a tv show and tara reid the actress was on it, he started commenting about how hot she used to be before her breast implants etc..then later during the show he mumbled, "tara reid is hot" and i said huh? ...
A. 30 May 2010: Lol Prion! True true, she's kind of fugly. I don't think you should read too much into it at all. It probably means he's just comfortable enough with you that he doesn't feel weird making those comments. It doesn't mean anything at all. For ... (read in full...)
Birth control question!
Q. Okay so I have been on birth control for about 4 months and after the first two months I've been having unprotected sex with my boyfriend a bunch. A condom is not used AT ALL. Do you think I should have less sex, sex with a condom all the time, or ...
A. 29 May 2010: It's not unprotected if you're using a method of birth control! Using a condom and the pill is a little much, just remember to take your pill at the same time every day. Set a phone alarm or something. It's like sunscreen SPF. Using a sunscreen with ... (read in full...)
I hate my breasts!
Q. Okay so I don't have the "model boobs" that you see in Playboy mags, Porn, Movies/Tv and everyday life! I don't have big boobs, I don't have those cute small nipples, and I don't have perfect round ones. I have 34b boobs with big nipples and that ...
A. 29 May 2010: It's this kind of question that makes me so sad about the expectations for women in America. Porn stars aren't real. They are airbrushed and digitally altered and put in creative lighting and have TONS of plastic surgery. They aren't real. They are ... (read in full...)
My wife is noticing that I'm constantly on the internet
Q. Well ive bin married for five years now and i recently got a computer to keep contact with my friends and fam. But i have found my self in a situation im falling for a girl i met online that lives milles away from were i live. MY question is could ...
A. 29 May 2010: I agree with celiaaletta. How did this turn from staying in touch with people to having an emotional affair? Cause that's what you're doing. I wouldn't leave your wife for an online lover. Interactions that take place online never are like the ... (read in full...)
Can I still be pregnant even if the pregnancy test was negative?
Q. Hello, My period is late. My cycle is often (but not always!) 30 days, I'm now on day 34. I took a pregnancy test yesterday morning but it was negative. The last week I've felt nausea, backpains, pain in my stomach, headaches, been very very h...
A. 29 May 2010: Yes, you can, but it's unlikely. At this early of a point if you were pregnant, the symptoms you describe sound more like the psychological symptoms of thinking you're pregnant rather than actually being pregnant. You can always go get a blood test ... (read in full...)
My wife won't give me a blowjob!!!!
Q. I'd like to start by confirming I m 32 not 21. So this is my problem... My wife don't want to give me a blowjob anymore because she says she doesn't like it. I'm going down on her all the time because that's the only way that she can have multiple...
A. 29 May 2010: Some women think it's demeaning or smelly. A lot of the time it's because they don't like the smell and taste of cum. I think you should talk to her about it and find out why she stopped. Tell her how amazing it feels and how much you love it when ... (read in full...)
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