| Latest articles: About Facebook and relationships
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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Why is my girlfriend lying to me?
Q. Okay, so I have a situation where I can hardly ever trust my girlfriend. We've been together for almost 2 years and I still findit hard to believe her. Sometimes she'll tell me she's busy at work, but then if I call her up 5 minutes later, I...
A. 31 December 2009: She clearly has no respect for you. Move on before she lies to you about something more major, like cheating.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps souvenirs of his ex
Q. Months ago, i found in my boyfriends room, cards and photos from his previous relationship. I asked him why did he keep them and he said "to remember the good memories". This hurt a lot but he eventually threw them away. He reasoning later was that ...
A. 31 December 2009: I understand why you'd feel upset that he has postcards and such, but are you really so upset over souvenirs that he kept of them or are you simply jealous that he had other girlfriends? This isn't a "get over it" situation. It's actually very ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting about my boyfriend's eagerness for a threesome?
Q. Am I overreacting when my boyfriend is overly enthused about a threesome? I mean, I brought it up, but I just wanted to see what he would say. Now its all he can talk about, and he wants it with my best friend who is prettier than me and has bigger ...
A. 31 December 2009: I'm going to ask a difficult question first. Why did you bring it up in the first place? You say to see what his reaction would be, but why? Did you want to see if he'd go for the idea of sleeping with someone else? For some couples a threesome ... (read in full...)
No period but I know I'm not pregnant
Q. sooo i been feel throwin up for 3 days now , and i didn't have my period for a month . But i know i ain't pregnant because i didn't have sex ! but like 3 days before i was drunk . I don't know what's wrong with me ! and like 3 weeks ago i was ...
A. 29 December 2009: Agreed. Alcohol or coffee and an ulcer is bad news. That will definitely make you throw up. Go to a doctor.... (read in full...)
Does it always hurt to be fingered?
Q. Im 15 and my boyfriend is 16. he has been fingering me on and off for the past two years. I could say I am normally relaxed I think :S. I also tell my boyfriend what to do and if its hurting,it even hurts when he uses one finger so we stick to th...
A. 29 December 2009: I agree with the below poster that teen boys generally are pretty terrible at sex and foreplay. Most guys think that fingering is to pretend their finger is a penis and just stick it in there. And then pull it out and stick it in again. And then ... (read in full...)
I am interested in swinging but I worry the other men are too 'big' for me.
Q. My husband and I are very interested in swinging. I have been wanting to try this for years and now that we have discussed it for some time now we both are anxious to get into the game! I have a little fear though. I am small, height, weight and ...
A. 29 December 2009: Your vagina can expand to be freaking enormous. When aroused it expands significantly. With enough lube and if you're turned on enough, you can fit a fist in. That's why it feels "ridged" inside. It's like an accordion. A penis should be fine (yes ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend doesn't trust me and I'm sick of it!
Q. I just saw the search history on my boyfriends computer. We've been together for almost two years, and I have never once been unfaithful or lied. I reassure him constantly that he is the one I want to be with. He tells me that he trusts me and...
A. 29 December 2009: No not all, but I have to say I occasionally go a little google crazy when I'm feeling insecure and the stuff that comes up in the search history would sound pretty mad. Does it mean I don't trust my boyfriend? I think when you find things in ... (read in full...)
I really want to know why he would rather masturbate than sleep with me?
Q. Hi I am 38 and have been married for 4 years (hubby is same age). It is both of ours' second marriage. There is 2 children. One 7y from my previous marriage and one of 2y that we had together. Our sexlife has never been massively passionate. Mo...
A. 29 December 2009: Why not try being more enthusiastic before you jump to the conclusion he doesn't want you? I know you feel like you've tried, but it isn't at the point of no return yet. If he's already masturbated by evening and you want him, jump him when he wakes ... (read in full...)
Should I ask him to wear a condom even though we are not having intercourse?
Q. New Year`s coming soon and my boyfriend and I will be together on one of the party in my friends house. We`re dating about 2 months and now we want to be a little more intimate. I`m not going to sleep with him cause I`m not ready for that yet but we ...
A. 29 December 2009: The only reason for him to wear a condom is if you're worried about STDs. It's safer in that sense for him to wear a condom. So if you're worried about STDs, then he should wear a condom ONLY for the blowjob. Though it is difficult to catch an STD ... (read in full...)
What are some of the early signs of pregnancy?
Q. my question is about before a missed period and pregnancy ... what were some mild symptoms before finding out ur preggo... not the throwing up stuff but more like ain in ovaries and stuff like that?...
A. 29 December 2009: You won't notice the signs except for in hindsight. If you start looking for soreness, you're going to find it. You'll just need to wait and take a test to know. I'd take a few, just in case. Why are you worried before showing any signs?... (read in full...)
How do I accept my bf looking at naked pictures?
Q. Hi there, need some help! I have low self esteem and I have just found out my boyfriend has been looking at half naked girls on the internet through his phone. I am totally annoyed at this n feel abit angry. Is this wrong? I don't want to say anyt...
A. 29 December 2009: No one can tell you how you feel. I promise you're going to get some responses from guys telling you it's normal and all men look at porn and to get over it.
Guess what. Not all men look at porn (though I'd assume nearly all have at some point) and ... (read in full...)
How can I make my breasts bigger, apart from surgery?
Q. I have an extremly small breast and it makes me feel so shy when i see ma friends with big ones. Im 21, if there is any means of making it bigger apart from going for surgery. I'll really appreciate ur help....
A. 27 December 2009: The pill SOMETIMES makes your breasts bigger, but the risks that come from taking the pill aren't really worth it, plus it goes away even if you remain on the pill. The pills out there that promise an increase in breast size are not only baloney, ... (read in full...)
I'm ready until the condom goes on
Q. when my girlfriend and i make out and stuff i get an erection almost to easly, but when it comes to actuly having sex i feel nervise and i cant have one, when i finely do get one i put a condom on and then it goes away. it is so embarising, my ...
A. 26 December 2009: Why not have her put the condom on in a sexy way, while you guys are making it? Instead of stopping all the action to do it, practice just kind of smoothly doing it while you guys are still making it out. Have her put it on as part of a handjob. ... (read in full...)
How do I forgive the person who raped me when I was a child?
Q. For years a family member molested me from the age of 4 till I was 12. When I was 9 he started to rape me, I use to be very sore for days and I bled alot and I got infections and couldn't walk properly. I never told anyone as he always threatened ...
A. 26 December 2009: Forgiving a kid who scratched your car with their bike is one thing. Forgiving this kind of abuse is another. He doesn't deserve your forgiveness. I could never forgive the man who raped me, he doesn't deserve it. I am a firm believer that talking ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my boyfriend I lied about my past?
Q. I have lied to my boyfriend about my sexual past. I did so early in our relationship out of fear of rejection and judgment, but ever since I have felt absolutely terrible. I told him I had only slept with 2 people, but the truth is that I have slept ...
A. 26 December 2009: Agreed, this is a very sticky situation. I might just not tell him at all now that you've lied. It's really not worth getting dumped over this in my opinion.... (read in full...)
Do some girls just not like oral sex?
Q. Hello, well i'm with my GF for 6 months, and we love and trust each other, maybe in 2-3 months she will move to my place.We're having sex really often each 2-3 days, but as i noticed she likes blowjobs but dislike when i'm performing it to her(oral ...
A. 26 December 2009: Just because she likes giving you blowjobs doesn't mean she likes oral sex in general. Giving a blowjob is VERY different than a woman receiving oral sex. They are completely different acts. You need to make her comfortable. Plus, your "skills" may ... (read in full...)
Home remedy for a yeast infection?
Q. Hi, So I had gone over my guy's house and was on my period, but we still had intercourse. When I'm on my period usually we don't use a condom, except this time i got kind of dry during intercourse. When i had gotten home i had noticed I was itchy "d...
A. 26 December 2009: I doubt you have a yeast infection, you're probably just chafed. Chafed can be EXTREMELY painful or uncomfortable, but nothing like a yeast infection. If it's a yeast infection you will smell "bready" down there and have strange discharge and trust ... (read in full...)
Should you be honest about fantasies?
Q. What is the right thing to say to your boyfriend when they ask you what else other than them you think about during masturbation?...
A. 26 December 2009: Well generally things you think about are fine and good to talk about, but don't talk about PEOPLE you fantasize about unless those people are your boyfriend. Even if he asks you who and you think about other people, lie. Normally I don't advise ... (read in full...)
Can sperm on clothes make you pregnant?
Q. Here`s the thing... I`m virgin and last night I had a wonderful time with my boyfriend, but I`m wondering; can girl be pregnant if guy ejaculate in his pants and she sits close on him? Can the sperme go trough clothes and so on? I know this is a p...
A. 25 December 2009: No, it definitely can't. I mean if he ejaculated on your underwear and you sat in it maybe, but on his own pants and then sat near you? It's like a contagious virus. There is pretty much zero probability.... (read in full...)
Do some girls just not like oral sex?
Q. Hello, well i'm with my GF for 6 months, and we love and trust each other, maybe in 2-3 months she will move to my place.We're having sex really often each 2-3 days, but as i noticed she likes blowjobs but dislike when i'm performing it to her(oral ...
A. 25 December 2009: I've always been too self conscious to relax and enjoy it, after a drunk guy doing it told me he hated the way girls smell down there, always. It's taken me a full, I dunno, maybe 8 months to relax enough to even vaguely like it. I'm getting there ... (read in full...)
Going out with best friends brother? A do? A don't? How do I tell her?
Q. my problem is about boys! i'll begin from a year before.oh by da way i'm 15 So last year during December i was going through some problems and i was in a real state, so i went to my best friends house, and she wasn't there, her brother (Jack) a...
A. 25 December 2009: I didn't read the whole thing, sorry, it was REALLY long. But I did read your last paragraph. Sometimes going out with a brother is OK, sometimes not. You'll need to just ask your friend if it's OK first or else you might lose her as a friend.... (read in full...)
We almost had sex and now b/f is very quiet
Q. me nd my boyfriend have been together for bout 6 months :) anyway, im underage and hes older and we are both virgins so we waitin for my 16th to first "do it" but a couple of days ago..we almost did.. and ever since then hes been really quiet......
A. 25 December 2009: I agree, he's just trying to make sure there aren't any "close calls." He wants to be law-abiding. He'll relax with time, just don't try to jump him anytime soon!... (read in full...)
What is consider to be a pedophile? Do these situations fall under that?
Q. hi guys another question that keeps popping up in my head if your a teenager and your thinking of/having sex with someone else around your age is it considered as paedophilia and another question if your under 14 and your thinking of/ having ...
A. 25 December 2009: The first one is legal and fine so long as you're both 16 or older (18 in some states). The second is statutory rape, consensual or not. Totally illegal. Not a pedophile, but definitely creepy.... (read in full...)
Tell him or lock it in my head?
Q. I feel confused and wrong. I'm 17 and i'm crushing on my 29 year old teacher. i have it bad, i can't stop thinking about him and being around him makes me excited and happy as well as nervous and scared. i need help i dont know why im feeling this ...
A. 24 December 2009: All that would happen is he would nicely explain to you that he can't and the rest of your time at school would be awkward. First off, I know you think you like him for him, but you like him because he's your teacher. He's a completely different ... (read in full...)
He gives a damn while my boyfriend doesnt! Which one do I chose?
Q. I had previously been going out with my boyfriend last year but broke it off when i had feelings for someone else. Ever since then I regretted it so when the opportunity came to get back together i jumped at it. We've been going out for 4 months ...
A. 24 December 2009: I agree. Go out with the one who cares! I agree you should never be second best. You should always come first.... (read in full...)
Should I resume contact with my first love who broke my heart?
Q. On June the 25th 2007 I got my first taste of heartache. My long distance girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me. I felt the worst pain of my entire life on that day, and I never felt that I would recover. It was the worst time of my entire life. ...
A. 24 December 2009: Don't mess things up with your current girl by doing this. You might break her heart and then get yours broken in the process. Also, I know you feel happy now, but what happens when you hear from her and all those crazed emotions come rushing back ... (read in full...)
Can't orgasm without vibrator!
Q. Heya, I'm a 20 year old woman. When I was about 15- 16 years old, I realised I could not achieve orgasm via touching. At that time, I spent loads of time trying to use my fingers, but nothing would ever happen. So I started using vibrators. They ...
A. 24 December 2009: This is surprisingly normal. Media will have you think that you're broken if you can't orgasm from sex alone. Well guess what. Only 30% of the sexually active population can orgasm from sex alone! And a much higher number than you would think NEED a ... (read in full...)
He hasn't said it but I think he needs space?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost five months. We love each other a lot and lately have been doing..more things. It started as the kissing/ making out thing, then we started the hickey thing. Then it was the getting on each other thing, ...
A. 24 December 2009: Next time you're feeling anxious and want to talk to him, go pop in your favorite happy movie and watch it instead of talking to him. Call a friend and hang out. Do anything but call him. If he cares, he will notice your distance and come to you. He ... (read in full...)
Am I depressed? Unlucky? Both?
Q. I have quite a happy life, but I'm always in a bad mood. I rarely go outside, and i can't stand sunlight. This is caused by me being secluded within my own thoughts. people have tried to make me happy, but it never work. Every time i get happy, ...
A. 24 December 2009: Yes you could be depressed, like the kind that makes you sad even though things are going OK and makes seconds go by like minutes and minutes like hours when things go wrong. Therapists are very good with this, I would talk to one. Your school can ... (read in full...)
Futanaria..anyone give me any info about this web site?
Q. I have a question... This really weirded me out when I found pictures of girls with dicks on his computer. Futanaria iswhat it's called and I think it's kind of messed up. Can anyone give me anything about this??I m kind of freaking out. He...
A. 24 December 2009: Shemale porn is actually really common, and straight men and women enjoy it more frequently than you might think. If you don't have a problem with him looking at porn then I wouldn't worry about it being perverted. Child or animal porn would be ... (read in full...)
Confusion about masturbation
Q. Well, im a 16 male and i masturbate quite a lot maybe evan 3 - 5 times a day and its kind of like a habbit to me, for some reason im getting really horny really easily but then sometimes when im horny i wont get an erection but i will masturbate ...
A. 24 December 2009: You might want to consider cutting back slowly as that's a really high number. Like another person said, if you get too used to your hand you won't be responsive to a vagina as it's softer. 5 times a day is a LOT. I'm not saying masturbation is bad, ... (read in full...)
I'm insecure and he finds other women attractive, how do I deal with this?
Q. I really love my boyfriend, but he did something that reallyhurt me and makes me angry, as insignificant as it may sound and I can't let go! So, he was angry with me on Tuesday. That day I called him and he told me that he had seen so many really ...
A. 24 December 2009: I hate that answer "all guys notice other women, they can't help it." They can help it. My boyfriend tells me I'm the most beautiful girl in the world to him and all other women have completely lost their appeal, that he doesn't even notice anymore. ... (read in full...)
I did nothing while we were on a break, but now he says it's over because he thinks I cheated!
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up on Saturday over a heated argument, he went out that night and mingled with other females and enjoyed hiself according to my friends. He also reactivated his facebook account, which is something that we got rid of because ...
A. 24 December 2009: What an @$$!!!! The only reason he's accusing you of cheating (it wasn't if you were on a break) is because he probably did the same. Classic cheating behavior. This guy is clearly a jerk. You should move on to someone more deserving.... (read in full...)
2 week holiday fling was so special I want to emigrate to be with her, what do you guys think?
Q. I have just come back from a wonderful 3 week holiday in New zealand, where i had an amazing fling of 2 weeks with an amazing girl( a friend of a friend) I am now back in UK but she is talking about me moving out to NZ, getting a job, be together...
A. 24 December 2009: New Zealand is a beautiful and wonderful place. I'm pretty sure most everyone wants to live there anyways. Why not take another holiday and see what happens?... (read in full...)
Is it normal to fantasize about people other than your partner during sex/masturbation?
Q. How often do you masturbate to thoughts of people that are not your girlfriend/boyfriend and when does this become abnormal? Is it normal to fantasize about other people when you are having sex with your bf?...
A. 24 December 2009: It's not abnormal and I'm sure we've all done this occasionally but I think it's a little disrespectful to think of someone else while having sex (if you're in a relationship). I mean how would you feel if you knew he was thinking about someone else ... (read in full...)
Haven't had my period yet, but now I'm getting a strange discharge, any ideas what this could be?
Q. I'll just dive right in. I am 14 years old and have never had a period before. But about 2 days ago I found a huge brown/bloody splotch on my underwear. I changed them and put on a pad just because. Then later that night nothing else had happened, ...
A. 24 December 2009: My first period was like this too. Don't worry about it. "Enjoy" being a woman. :)... (read in full...)
I found porn on his computer, why does he need it??
Q. hi should i be worried , i stayed round my boyfriend house and was on his computer when i noticed a porn website that he vists should i say something to him , or keep quiet about it and why does he look at this when he has me as his girlfrie...
A. 22 December 2009: If it doesn't bother you that it's there, I wouldn't say anything. If it does though, don't tell him you were snooping you could just talk to him about how he feels about porn. If he doesn't want to stop watching it, you could ask if he'd want to ... (read in full...)
She wants me to do things in bed that I disagree with
Q. Ok I have a major problem. I have been dating this new girl for 3 months now. I have always been known as the sweet guy and I am very repsectful towards women. The thing is my girlfreidn is kinda kiny when it coems to sex. Which I think is fun but ...
A. 22 December 2009: If you're uncomfortable with it, just say no. If she's asking for it it's not disrespectful, but if it's something you're uncomfortable with, just say no. It's that easy.... (read in full...)
Is it likely I am pregnant?
Q. My menstrual cycle is generally pretty regular, usually from around 29-34 days in length, averaging at about 33 days in the past 9 months. My last cycle was 34 days, and i had sex the night before it started, where my boyfriend came inside me. The ...
A. 22 December 2009: Unlikely. If you miss your period though take a test. I wouldn't worry too much about it, just use a condom next time.... (read in full...)
How to have sex life with porn star boyfriend?
Q. There is a man I have been seeing for the past 5 months we are now boyfriend and girlfriend. I found out he was a porn actor on our third date. He has mention introduced everybody even people he has worked with and caught him in the act on the job ...
A. 22 December 2009: Porn stars don't generally view what they do as sex. It's just a job, and it's totally separate from their actual sex lives.... (read in full...)
My partner has problems keeping it up once as soon as he enters....
Q. my partner, gets a ecrection fine... its stays up fine.. but as soon as he places its in...it wont last even two mintues...he releases too quick. he has tried masturbating before make love.. till nothing seems to work. as soon as his inside me... he ...
A. 22 December 2009: Actually two minutes is the average time a man can last after penetration. Some things you can do: You be on top so he can't go jackrabbit fast and you go slow, do whatever to please yourself. Don't worry so much about him, he'll be fine with ... (read in full...)
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