A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend's sex life has been declining. We used to have sex at night about 5 times a week. Now we are down to one, maybe two nights a week. He is usually too tired to do it at night, so we have been having morning sex. Well the recent trend is.. he has to pee in the morning... so we start getting into it.. and then we stop because he has to pee. It ruins the mood for him ... and we both haven't been able to finish together in a while!I've tried to initiate it at night or even in the middle of the night ... but he will push me away. I'm just so frustrated! I've tried talking to him about it, and he apologizes. He is not depressed and I even have more of a strenuous job than he does. I don't know what gives ....Does this problem happen to guys often? Can they really not have sex in the morning if they 'have to pee'? Or do you think that is just an excuse?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2010): He's probably sleeping more deeply than he used to and not getting up to pee in the middle of the night. I had the same problem. I stopped drinking so much coffee and soda and I quit drinking anything for two hours before I went to bed just because I hope and prayed for midnight sex which is great because there is nothing better in the world than waking up inside my wife. I love it when she does that. Also we have had our own issues with morning sex. Morning breath. We do oral to each other and don't kiss or missionary. Hope this helped.
A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (21 April 2010):
 Yeah, the peeing thing is an issue for guys. The problem is this:
Guys may need to pee, but not really bad so they don't get up to go. Next thing you know you're both getting turned on and in the heat of the moment... you start having sex and it just gets really uncomfortable. You have to wait till your erection goes down before your body will allow you to urinate, and by then it's really hard to get back into that moment.
All guys go through the same thing, you just really have to have the "want" or the desire. Obviously the peeing thing didn't stop him back when you were doing it 5 days a week. Part of it is in his mind. He might not be depressed, or even love you less... it's just that point of the relationship where he's getting used to you and the true lust like in the early part of the relationship might be wearing off a bit. But again, it doesn't mean he doesn't love you as much or is less attracted to you... you just have to trying changing it up a bit. Maybe try doing it in the shower in the morning AFTER he pees. Or after he's ready in the morning be bent over the couch or kitchen table with your pants down all ready for him.... just sexy, unexpected things to spice your sex life up a bit...
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A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (21 April 2010):
 I know I can't have sex if I have to pee the pressure in my belly just won't allow me to get excited, I'm not sure I'm not a guy but I think there body must feel the same pressure if they have to pee. Send him to the rest room before you initiate sex and if he keeps denying you sex talk to him. If no positive outcome comes from this than get your vibrator ready pleasure yourself, and when he feels like joining deny him, than he is going to know how it feels to be turn down.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (21 April 2010):
 Tell him to go pee and then come back to bed. There's really not an issue, he just needs to PREPARE. Me and my boyfriend don't just stop because we forgot tissues, we take a little break, he runs for the paper, I get my vibrator and we come back to bed for more fun.
Morning sex is great, just tell him to go pee first. And you know sex in the evening really isn't the best time. You are both tired, no more energy. What about a quickie during the day? Or after breakfast? You wear a skirt and he zipps upp and the entire thing should be easy, great, and over in 5-7 minutes.
The man can't pee if he is erect, but he can still feel the pressure and need to. I've had to call it off during sex because Ive had to pee as well, just from all the pressure on my belly.
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A
male
reader, pipsta  +, writes (21 April 2010):
Hi there,
Needing to pee during sex is a huge inconvenience for a guy, and usually it is impossible o continue, and when you go to pee, you have to be 'soft' in order to do so.
This does ruin the guys mood because it can sometimes be difficult to get an erection after you hve just gotten rid of one!
as for the declining sex life, I suggest not pushing for it, and eventually he will see that it isn't something that isn't just offered to him, and he will no longer take it for granted, and will probably result in him wanting sex more often. also try talking to him to see if there is a problem. Being open about sex and intimacy in a relationship does wonders!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (21 April 2010):
 Really they can't have sex if they have to pee or it's very difficult. Have him pee before sex and then jump him. However, it does sound like you have more problems than just that his bladder is full. It seems like even though yes, guys do get too tired for sex, if he can't make time for it at least most days if you're willing there's a problem. Make sure there aren't underlying problems with the relationship, like he feels emotionally disconnected or something. If it seems like everything else in the relationship is fine, there could be other things ranging from the mild like he's just been masturbating too much to the extreme like there's another woman. Even though a decline in sex drive is normal in a long term relationship, this seems sudden/extreme. Good luck.
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