A
female
age
30-35,
*if3sucks
writes:hey there i have quite the problem and i have no clue what to do about it...my bf well hes a jack ass but he can be so sweet too... two weekends ago i found out the three times during our relationship he texted a girl he had sex with before dating me talking to her all sexual saying he wished he was in the shower with her and stuff like that so i sat down and talked to him and gave him a second chance and he is kinda mean to me not physically but the things he says isnt that nice and i asked him about it and he says hes just joking around and stuff and i just dont know what to do i dont want to end the relationship i just want him to be more caring and less mean. so if you could help me untangle this mess of mine that would be great. thanks much!
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female
reader, lif3sucks +, writes (9 June 2010):
lif3sucks is verified as being by the original poster of the question thanks everyone but i really dont want to end the relationship everything is going fine now we just decided that i shouldnt be staying the night all the time and to give each other space...i dont like it but if thats what he wants then its worth a try i suppose havent seen him in two days and hardly talk to him dont like it i feel lonely and not really loved but i dont guess its wroth a try?
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (8 June 2010):
 I agree, this guy sounds like a jerk and a player. Just because he can be nice to you sometimes doesn't mean he's actually a nice person. He talks dirty with other girls, which is cheating in some people's books, and he's only nice to you when he has something to gain. Joking around? I don't think so. You sound like a nice girl, this guy is obviously a loser. There are tons of nice guys out there who will treat you better, but you'll never do so if you're with this jerk.
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A
female
reader, Empressjai  +, writes (8 June 2010):
 Leave....before its too late. Come off planet infatuation and return to earth before you really get hurt
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A
female
reader, BunnyTee +, writes (8 June 2010):
 So, he's "kinda mean to you and just isn't nice to you anymore" AFTER you sat him down and talked this over with him?? CLUE #1, sweetheart: he's NEVER going to be nice to you. The evidence is staring you in the face.
Were he genuinely sorry and demonstrating contrition for having hurt you, he would be the exact opposite of mean and not nice.
He's mean and not nice, because you busted him and called him on it.
The odds are stellar that he's still texting and "joking" even worse now, if he's not already in that shower!
There are other ways to "joke" and tease all in good fun. And it's NOT like he's telling you. These are lies told by guys to get you off their case so they can continue doing what you object to without further static from you about it.
Dump the ZERO, Sweetie, *YOU* set the standards for how you're treated. A good man, worth having, DOES NOT treat you this way. Learn that now while you're still young.
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A
female
reader, ruby buttons +, writes (8 June 2010):
 hello lif3sucks,
speaking from alot of experiences with dicks i would say dump him so what if he is nice sometimes, you want someone to treat you like the princess you are all the time not just when he feels like it.
and to text his ex sexual things that is pure wrong i mean would you do that to him NO because its not what people do in relationships you need trust and this has prob knocked yours
you are young and there are plenty more frogs to kiss dont pin your life on this lad I know he is prob the love of your life now but unless he can prove that he can be a nice lad who wants you i say get rid of him and find yourself someone who cares for you.
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