I have been dumped after 10 years, during which he kept picking fault with me. Help!
Q. i have just been 'dumped' after 10 years. I am an extremely attractive and kind soul. I did not deserve this. I tried to change for him when he kept picking fault with me. he would never try, even counselling. i made the decision to let it go, ...
A. 9 June 2008: Thanks for your update.
You need to think of yourself first and not sell your soul down the river to some heartless and soulless creature.
... (read in full...)
I asked my husband for a break because he is always out but now he's found someone else... will he ever come back?
Q. I asked my husband for a break as he is always out. I want him home and he says I'm not coming home. I ask is he ever coming home and his reply is I don't know what the future holds. He wants me to move on but I can't until I hear the words I'm ...
A. 25 February 2008: I am sorry for what you are going through.
If he is the one for you , he will come back to your side. Men are creatures of habit.They would prefer to do things the usual and same way.They will missed all those familiar things.
Give him some... (read in full...)
I have been dumped after 10 years, during which he kept picking fault with me. Help!
Q. i have just been 'dumped' after 10 years. I am an extremely attractive and kind soul. I did not deserve this. I tried to change for him when he kept picking fault with me. he would never try, even counselling. i made the decision to let it go, ...
A. 25 February 2008: You are a whole woman even if you are without a man.
I am glad and happy that events have moved to your satisfaction and that you can chart your own life and begin a new life with him, a better and more understanding partner.
You have rest... (read in full...)
How to show my teacher that I'm available without settling our friendly relationship? How to tell if he has (supressed, due to regulations) sexual feelings towards me?
Q. I'm 17 (skipped 2 years of school, now a freshman in college), my teacher is 32. We're intellectual equals and he thinks i'm very smart and funny, and in class he singles me out and playfully banters with me in front of the others.. basically,i get ...
A. 25 February 2008: When you talk to him , you get into a very close contact with him and sparks would fly and you offer no resistance to his touch or move away from him.
I am not sure if you are breaking any school regulations or jeopardies his career on the line... (read in full...)
When I offer him oral he ejaculates very quickly, is this bad?
Q. this one guy when i give him blowjobs and stuff he ejaculates really quickly is that bad?...
A. 25 February 2008: He is too tensed and may have premature ejaculations.When he feels like coming , he should tell you to take a break or rest to get over that feeling or urge.... (read in full...)
He has bad migrains for which doctors could not provide efficient treatment - our relation has deteriorated due to his irascibility, please help.
Q. Dear Cupid, Please help! I'm 21 years old in my last year of uni and my 24 year old boyfriend of 8 months has recently started work in the city. Although we have a long distance relationship we see each other roughly every 6 weeks for a couple of ...
A. 25 February 2008: I feel for you and life have been unkind and unfair to you .I am very sorry you are going through a very bad patch in your life.
You are a kind and good natured person but that is not enough to make your life more happier.
It is a harsh reali... (read in full...)
I am due to have a MRI scan and feel very nervous about hospitals. What to do about this state of anxiety?
Q. Hello, this isn't a relationship question but I've seen some good answers regarding various things on here so I thought I'd post this question: I have to have an MRI scan done soon and I have worked myself up into such a state of anxiety about it ...
A. 25 February 2008: I am sorry to hear of your present state of affairs that is affecting your wellbeing.
Since you have no serious illness and this is just a routine test, you should lay your anxieties to rest.
Whatever happens will happen and if you worry , y... (read in full...)
Do I push for sex or respect my girlfriend's wishes?
Q. i want to have sex but my girlfriend doesnt want to until engagement. Should i try to push for sex or just respect her wishes and hope for the best??...
A. 25 February 2008: Saying is one thing and doing it is another .
You may have those ideals but when certain conditions are present ,unexpected things do happen.We can promise ourself but sometimes it is hard to keep them.
When everything is right, things wi... (read in full...)
Is it true that men want what they can't have?
Q. is it true that men want what they cant have? I've been told many times that the reason why the guy i used to like started talking to me again is because he found out that someone else is interested in me and im over him.Now he has been trying t...
A. 25 February 2008: If a woman gives in easily , the men would think she is cheap and would in the back of their mind think that she is easily available and hence not valued or appreciated.
He would rather prefer a woman after a hard chase and he would value and appr... (read in full...)
He left me stranded at 3am. Should I forgive him?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been dating a guy for ten months. Over the weekend we got into a fight. Frankly, I don't know what he was mad about. We had been drinking quite a bit. He started screaming in my face and left me at the sports bar without a ri...
A. 25 February 2008: Sometimes, anger can make you lose control of your senses. Some men can lose control of the situation. You should forgive him .He could not control himself . It is like the devil was unleashed .
Mostly when they have reached their toleranc... (read in full...)
Am I right to be wary of this new relationship or am I just being over cautious?
Q. I have been dating this guy for a couple of months. I just wanted to know if my thoughts on the relationship are normal... I am really, really into him. When I am with him, I can't get enough of him. But I am also wary. Sometimes the littlest...
A. 25 February 2008: Just live from day to day and learn from our mistakes.
Don't run away from problems. Tackle the problems head on and take one problem at a time.Take it as a challenge in life.... (read in full...)
Why do I find it hard to leave a relationship where there is no love??
Q. Why do I find it hard to leave a relationship where there is no love, intimacy and no respect? I believed I was more in this relationship than what he will admit to. I work with him and live with him, I dont have anything of my own. I believed ...
A. 25 February 2008: Leaving is not easy because there are so many unknown factors when you are alone.You are living in a cocoon and there is protection and safety .
To venture out of your comfort zone can be a big challenge. You need to prepare yourself mentally... (read in full...)
Why does my girlfriend never open up to me?
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for a little under 6 months and I have noticed she never seems to open up to me and I don't know what to do. Is this normal for girls?...
A. 25 February 2008: Be more patient, for behind her thick and heavy door may lie
some precious treasures or some dark secrets.LOL!
You need to gain her trust and make her feel loved before she can open like a blooming flower.... (read in full...)
I don't trust my boyfriend, its hard financially, but I want another baby, advice please?
Q. Ok so I have a question. Hopefully someone can help. I'm a 24 yr old with a beautiful 3 yr old daughter. Lately I've been eager to have another child eventhough I know I'm definitely not ready. I'm living with my parents due to financial reasons. ...
A. 25 February 2008: If it is not a financial constraint to have another child, then I think having another child would be in the best interest of your daughter.She will have someone to play and grow up with.... (read in full...)
Should I keep talking to her or not?
Q. Hello everyone. Have a question that I hope some of you can help me with. Should I continue to see and talk to my ex? Its not all the time, every now and then. Sometimes we will meet out for dinner, or spend the day together. Sometimes, I am ...
A. 25 February 2008: If you find it enjoyable and pleasurable , then by all means do so. But you should only treat her as a friend and do not have too high an expectations of her or you will be dejected and unhappy.
You should let go of the past and do not go back ... (read in full...)
Trapped in a relationship
Q. Hi I am 20 years old, I have a 7 month old baby and I live with my boyfriend who is also my baby's father. We live with his mother. The thing about it is, I am not in love with him anymore and I want to move on with my life. The only problem is I ...
A. 25 February 2008: You should communicate your wants and aspirations to your b/f because you are not single and you share the responsibility of a baby .
It would be fair to him to know what are your wants and whether he can agree with your wishes . You can seek a c... (read in full...)
Will this man marry me, or am I wasting my time?
Q. I have been dating a guy for over 3 yrs - He says he loves me - My b-day just came and went and he jokingly told others his gift to me was that I could be his friend for another year - I am so sad - this is the same man who says he loves me - I ...
A. 25 February 2008: Everyone of us is not perfect and we have flaws.We may see things differently over many issues.
Do you see more positives in him than negatives?
Sometimes a man is obtuse and does not know what is important to a woman.
I would agree with rhy... (read in full...)
Is my husband having an affair?
Q. My husband has been working with his female assistant for about 8 months now. Up until the last month, I had not had reason to suspect anything that their relationship was anything other than professional. However, last month, one week he called her ...
A. 25 February 2008: It cannot be help that you will have those feelings when they work together. You need to handle those emotions in a matured and rational way.
You need to have concrete proof that they are on to something and not just based on some circumst... (read in full...)
New relationship, how long should I wait before having sex, I'm 28?
Q. how long should a nice girl wait before getting naked w/ a new boy? i'm 28 and dating again for the first time in years. my ex was the first guy i ever went 'all the way' with, and we'd been dating close to two years before we did (i was 25 when w...
A. 25 February 2008: You are an adult and there is no standards of sexual behaviors. Just follow your intuitions, for no one should judge you for what you do. That is your right.
You can have sex with anyone ,any time and anywhere you wish.Whatever you think is right... (read in full...)
He's big, but he cums too quickly, how can we deal with this?
Q. My boyfriend and I have only been together for alittle over a month and just recently started having sex. My boyfriend has quite a big penis. We have had sex about five times now and each time he ejaculates quite quickly which doesn't give me enough ...
A. 25 February 2008: You could engage in more foreplays and orals (manual and oral stimulations of your clitoris)to make you orgasm first before he is into you. That way you will be satisfied and it will not be a problem.
He has a condition known as premature ejaculat... (read in full...)
Ate rapidly, now I have stomachaches. Is there something wrong with me?
Q. i recently went to the doctors because i had symptons of a urine infection. i had some stomach pains and back pains i told the doctor and she felt my stomach and she told me to give a urine sample to be analysed and gave me a course of antibotics. ...
A. 25 February 2008: You ate something that is not compatible with your stomach .It is normal and you go see your GP and get the medicine and you will be OK.
It is those harmful bacteria that is causing those problems.... (read in full...)
If my friend reacts badly when I tell her I like her then our good friendship will probably be over. Please Help!
Q. hey everybody, I really like one of my best friends and she has an idea that I do. I want to tell her but If I tell her and she reacts badly then our good friendship will probably be over. Please Help!...
A. 25 February 2008: If you like her, she will know from your actions.Wait till she ask you that question.
If you know and she knows , then there is no need to tell it out .... (read in full...)
What is wrong with me that I can't get a boyfriend?
Q. About a year ago a met this guy and I kind of liked him! We knew each other for a while and I thought he liked me too. We were talking one night on bebo in mail and I had enough of it and decided to tell him so I did and I asked him what about you ...
A. 25 February 2008: There is nothing wrong with you . You are just having growing up pains.There will be the good , the bad and the ugly.
We experience it through our life all those good, bad and ugly things.They don't come in any order.
About that boy , you c... (read in full...)
I didn't turn him on
Q. Hello - I am not sure if i just need to sound off, or need some feedback...I think feedback to be honest. I recently met a man who is 43. I liked him alot and fancied him alot. I am mid 40, divorced and (about a year ago) out of a LTR. Th...
A. 24 February 2008: I am sorry about your predicaments. It is not your fault that life is unkind to you. Keep on looking and you will find the right guy. Maybe , it is third time lucky.
Do not be too harsh on yourself. Think positive always.... (read in full...)
Why am I feeling so low?
Q. at the moment i have been feeling so low. i have friends but i dont want to be near them and i feel really distant from everybody in general. i dont want to get close to anyone and the littlest things upset me. i am 14 years old and this has been...
A. 24 February 2008: I think you need to seek some professional help ,go and see your GP or a therapist for your conditions.... (read in full...)
Can you lose your virginity through masturbation?
Q. what are difference between virgin pussy and un virgin pussy? and can a girl lose her virginity while masturbating (fingering only)?...
A. 24 February 2008: You can read all about the hymen here;-
http://www.youngwomenshealth.org/hymen.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hymen... (read in full...)
What is this liquid?
Q. hi. i have had sex and in the process of my penis entering my partner with in 10 to 15 secounds of the begining of sex a gush of liquid had come out of her. im not sure if she had ejaculated because she seemed unawear of what was going on. the liqu...
A. 24 February 2008: It is probably vaginal secretions during sexual arousals ,excitements or during intercourse. Sometimes, it can be excessive and its consistency may vary .
... (read in full...)
My parents want me to emigrate and my boyfriend wants me to marry him. Which do I choose?
Q. I am 21 and have a bf who wants to marry me but my parents wants me to migrate far from him.Who will i choose my parents or marry him an dont go anywhere.We r so i love. ...
A. 24 February 2008: What do you want in your life?
Do you want to get married , settle down and have your own family or do you want to follow your family ?
You cannot follow your family forever. There comes a time when you must decide and be responsible for ... (read in full...)
I've got a problem being open about being gay. What do I do?
Q. Hi i have a problem. i'm a masculine guy and i have always known that i liked guys but would always aviod actually meeting any as i enjoyed the thought of being with a man but knew if it actually came to the real thing i would run for the hills, s...
A. 24 February 2008: If your conscience troubles you and give you no peace, stop being a closet gay and go back to being straight.
Your spiritual or cultural upbringing may have caused you to have conflicts inside of you.
You are not ready to live a gay life yet.... (read in full...)
He barely has time for me and found excuse to never visit me, what should I do?
Q. I've been with this same guy for a year now. And we've been through alot of arguments and brok up here and there. Now, it's like he barely has time for me. And he always wants to go out with his friends. We live so far apart, like about an hou...
A. 24 February 2008: You can try to change yourself to accept those living conditions as you cannot change him.
Or you can tell him your needs and if he cannot meet them, then you need to rethink about this relationship where it is only a one way street.
Maybe ,... (read in full...)
Could you give me advice on how to broach the subject to him without embarrassing him or making him feel worse?
Q. I started dating my 34-year old boyfriend (he's a friend of my brother's) when I was 15, and we've been seeing each other for about a year now. I've been really happy with him so far, and I feel like he's not only my boyfriend but a casual friend as ...
A. 24 February 2008:
I think it would be better not to talk about it as it can make matters worse. Just let it go . It happened and you just treat him in a nice and understanding way.In time , he will get over this incident.... (read in full...)
Torn between my nasty boyfriend and a sweet friend.
Q. i need some serious help here guys... so ive been with this guy for almost 2 yrs now but he's controlling and he's not that nice to me... but he treats me good too so i don't know. but then i was talking to this other kid and he makes me happy but ...
A. 24 February 2008: Go for the one that can give you happiness and not pain.
If someone gives you pain and heartaches and argue often , then he is not the one for you.
It is very simple, just walk away from pain and embrace happiness.... (read in full...)
Sexual activity not finalised in intercourse, could I be pregnant?
Q. The other day, me and my boyfriend did a bit of foreplay. He came and then for the first time he fingered me, his penis did not enter me, but it touched my vagina. Could i be pregnent? ...
A. 24 February 2008: If there is any sperm deposited on the outside of your vagina , those sperms have a very long way to swim up into your fallopian tubes. The chances of reaching there is very slim . They can live inside you from 5 to possible 7 days .
When ... (read in full...)
I am in relationship with an older girl and feel pressurised to have sex. I also need to increase my confidence, how?
Q. i am in a relationship with an older girl and i am a virgin but she isn't. i feel pressured but don't want to have sex out of embarrasment. because of lack of exsperience and how would i know if its big or small compared to others'?...
A. 24 February 2008: A good workman does not blame his tools!He knows how to use his tools efficiently and effectively.
Whatever you want to know about the technicals , you can find it all online. Just Google your question.... (read in full...)
It was only one little mistake!
Q. I'm only 15 turning 16 and two months and I have a big problem. I did something so stupid I'll never be able to forgive myself every again. I met this 20 year old guy on a website and we really hit it off. We started "dating" the day we met. We ...
A. 24 February 2008: Just sit tight and do not tell anyone about this affair until your period comes or you missed it.Get a hold of yourself. If your period arrives, then you are not pregnant.
You may not be pregnant and it is the fear that is causing you sleeples... (read in full...)
He feels hurt and I don't know what to do.
Q. Hey I was dating a guy all through out high school we broke up and he dated many other people. Now he is single and he found out I was in an intimate relationship with another guy. He became very upset and made me feel like i betrayed him. He began ...
A. 24 February 2008: He is trying to win you back by making you feel guilty. This is manipulations. He wants to make you feel that he really loves you .
You are not responsible for his actions. He asked for it anyway. When he had you , he did not know how to apprecia... (read in full...)
How do you know a married man is sincerely in love and not pursuing an affair?
Q. My question is how do you know if a married man has fallen for you and whether his love is honest and not just looking for an affair? with an age gap Good advice needed and alot of advice needed...
A. 24 February 2008: If he give you the 5C's, Cash,Car, Condo, Credit Card,and Country club membership.... (read in full...)
Does anyone out there agree with staying a virgin until they are married?
Q. heyx I was just curious, is there anyone out there that agrees with me when i say i want to stay a virgin til im married? Does anyone think thats good? Im 15, and believe that you shouldnt have sex untill you have had your wedding. do you think th...
A. 24 February 2008: That is a very virtuous thought. It would be excellent if you can do that.
It is rare to find someone like you today in the Western society.
You can read my take here :-
http://www.pinksu... (read in full...)
She's becoming more distant
Q. My better half has been separated for a couple of years and is now at the point where the divorce will finally be settled (within the next few weeks). This has been taking a bit of a toll on our relationship and although I have been doing ...
A. 24 February 2008: I think you should not be unduly concerned about her .She does not want you to disturb her peace of mind. She wants to be left alone. Think positive and just go on living your life.... (read in full...)
He cares more about what his friends think than what he believes......
Q. grrr!!!!! im like in love with this one guy.........weve went out like 3 times!!! he broke up with me toady cuz one of his friends was gonna kick his ass.............and he cares more about what his friends think than what he believes ...
A. 24 February 2008: You cannot do much and if you love him , you will have to wait for him to grow up. You can tell him to be more independent and hope he will learn life's lessons from you. He is not ready for a relationship.His buddies is more important than y... (read in full...)
Relay my side of the story or ignore both of them
Q. Hoping some of the amazing agony aunts can help me out here. I dated a guy I really liked about a year ago. He ended it abruptly because a mutual person we both know talked unkindly about me..he related a bit of this to me. We were just establishing ...
A. 24 February 2008: Since he ended it without asking or confirming what he heard from you , it is pointless to tell him when he did not solicit your opinions.
If he is a fair minded person , he would have told you what he heard and seek the truth from you.
... (read in full...)
Meeting as friends to see what happens
Q. Hi, I'd really appreciate any advice you guys could give me. I'm 24 and my first real relationship ended last year in november. We'd been together 3 years but he felt he couldnt really give it his all anymore and I was feeling that I wasnt rea...
A. 24 February 2008: That married man is not a good option. You should give your attentions to your ex and see how it develops. Try to work at it and give your best shot.Take things each day as it comes..... (read in full...)
I have been dumped after 10 years, during which he kept picking fault with me. Help!
Q. i have just been 'dumped' after 10 years. I am an extremely attractive and kind soul. I did not deserve this. I tried to change for him when he kept picking fault with me. he would never try, even counselling. i made the decision to let it go, ...
A. 18 February 2008: If you are an extremely attractive and kind soul, why do you worry with a dead wood ?
There will be plenty of fresh and virile men who can replace him.
Do not let him destroy your spirit.Let no man tell you what to do or chain your spirit.... (read in full...)
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