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... Send *ddie a private message | | | *ddie's profile:Hi there. I go by Eddie. I'm from Canada. I have a great wife and two great kids, both teenagers. I've been with my wife for 21 years and we dated for two years before that.
I enjoy travel and learning new things. Different cultures interest me and what makes them tick. I think there is always a reason for the way certain cultures do things and many times we are too quick to judge things that we find odd.
The more places I go and the more people I meet, the more I see that we are so similar. Everybody is trying to enjoy life but we are all influenced along the way by the stuff that "happens". The trick is to learn from the lessons and carry on. I have a short fuse for infedility and take marriage very seriously. It's not from personal experiences either. I just don't understand why people don't seem to fix the problems in their marriages before they create more. I see lots of questions on this site pertaining to this topic, that's why I added this part. |
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| Latest articles: Why do people think the unattached person in a love triangle is a victim?
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 September 2007: Why is it that people get involved in love triangles and feel rejected when they don't work out? Why do so many agony aunts treat the third member of the triangle as a victim? I'm tired of hearing people reccommend.... "distance yourself from hi...
Fidelity and marriage
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 May 2007: Many times, we see questions asking for advice about marriage, monotony and fidelity. I tend to be cut and dry on this topic and often without compassion for the person struggling in this area. What bothers me most, is the ability of people to ...
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He was a real brute in the bedroom and forced himself on me, and then couldnt understand why i chucked him out! Do men get kicks out hurting women during sex ?
Q. hiya everyone, this is my sister in laws account. she recomend i go on here with my problem as she didnt really to know my problem. well im not sure if this is going to get posted because its a little extreme but if it does, oh please some one help. ...
A. 9 June 2006: I'd like to apologize to those who think I'm uncaring. Or to those I've offended. I'm on the woman's side here. When I first replied, I didn't see the final sentence about sceaming and crying. Before any of you judge me though you have to think ... (read in full...)
He was a real brute in the bedroom and forced himself on me, and then couldnt understand why i chucked him out! Do men get kicks out hurting women during sex ?
Q. hiya everyone, this is my sister in laws account. she recomend i go on here with my problem as she didnt really to know my problem. well im not sure if this is going to get posted because its a little extreme but if it does, oh please some one help. ...
A. 9 June 2006: Dr.Pete, what shocks you? I said the guy is wrong,he's a brute and should be reported. That is the obvious part. These things get cloudy though. My point is, at what point does it become rape? Obvioulsy in the end when someone is having hair ... (read in full...)
He was a real brute in the bedroom and forced himself on me, and then couldnt understand why i chucked him out! Do men get kicks out hurting women during sex ?
Q. hiya everyone, this is my sister in laws account. she recomend i go on here with my problem as she didnt really to know my problem. well im not sure if this is going to get posted because its a little extreme but if it does, oh please some one help. ...
A. 9 June 2006: Carebear...I didn't say anal is normal for everybody. It is however normal for some people. If you think that some people are not into anal sex, you're misinformed. I'm not saying it's good or bad, I'll be the first to say I haven't done it but ... (read in full...)
He was a real brute in the bedroom and forced himself on me, and then couldnt understand why i chucked him out! Do men get kicks out hurting women during sex ?
Q. hiya everyone, this is my sister in laws account. she recomend i go on here with my problem as she didnt really to know my problem. well im not sure if this is going to get posted because its a little extreme but if it does, oh please some one help. ...
A. 9 June 2006: To the guy who says I'm a jacka$$, read my reply again. I'm assuming you can read. I said the guy is a jerk, brute etc. You're missing the point. If this woman is disgusted now but didn't resist when it was happening, it's not rape. In order ... (read in full...)
He was a real brute in the bedroom and forced himself on me, and then couldnt understand why i chucked him out! Do men get kicks out hurting women during sex ?
Q. hiya everyone, this is my sister in laws account. she recomend i go on here with my problem as she didnt really to know my problem. well im not sure if this is going to get posted because its a little extreme but if it does, oh please some one help. ...
A. 8 June 2006: First of all, this guy is a jerk, to say the least. How long did you know him and is this the first time youhad sex. Don't take tis the wong way but I have to ask you some questions. Did you willingly get into bed with him? You say you couldn't ... (read in full...)
Should I seek counselling for my problem?
Q. I really need some advice, I'm really down at the moment. I think I've suffered from depression on and off for about 5 years now. I've always been a thoughtful person, even when I was a child but I think it's turning into something more and I ...
A. 8 June 2006: Go to your doctor and get some help. You say you can't get certain jobs if you're on medication. The truth is you won't be able to get any job if you don't deal with the problem and you bottom out mentally. You've taken the first step by talking ... (read in full...)
I felt like she did trust me by what she told me....what's going on?
Q. Please can people help me because im kind of confused. I was talking to this girl online and she was telling me about how she got depressed and that she was once in love and told me about it and how it ended in heartbreak. The next week i asked her ...
A. 8 June 2006: She told you that stuff because she wanted to vent off some steam. Really, think about this for a minute. How can she trust you, she doesn't know anything about you. Don't get caught up in the fantasy world of on line rrelationships. Example, I ... (read in full...)
We have been together for 4 years, I want a baby he doesnt, he doesnt want to move in, am I wasting my time ?
Q. hi i am going out with my boyfriend 4 years i have a child from another relationship i would love a baby with my boyfriend but he doesnt want 1. i have my own house and he doesnt want to move in i am 31 and he is 33 am i waisting my time with him he ...
A. 7 June 2006: I think you probably are wasting your time. At that age, it's one or the other. If he doesn't want to marry or live with you, what's his ultimate goal?... (read in full...)
She lied and said she was older, but now I'm a married man in love with a 14-year-old!
Q. What action should I take? I am a married man in my late twenties, who has fallen for someone much younger. We met in a chatroom last year, when her profile stated she was older. After a while, we spoke on MSN when I noticed that she was actu...
A. 6 June 2006: You should be ashamed and probably arrested. Something is wrong if you expect me, at least, to listen to you pining for a child. What could you have in common? She's a kid. Are you out of your mind. You'd better get help before her father ... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about my girlfriend?
Q. Hi, Well my girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years. She had to go away for a training seminar (work) for a month or so and we didn't get to communicate much. About two days ago she came back from the seminar and I saw some pictures of...
A. 6 June 2006: You're not being dramatic but it's you that doesn't like itn ont her. It doesn't mean she cheated either. The problem is, if you were to step back and look at a recepe for cheating, it appears she might have got to the third or fourth ... (read in full...)
What turns a man on about a women?
Q. Im needing a mans opinion on this, women are welcome. What turns a man on about a woman. Im wanting to spark up my relationship with my husband and I want him to desire me the way he used to when we first started dating. I try to do the things that ...
A. 6 June 2006: Talk to your man and ask him if there is something bothering him. Men usually like to be desired by their women for their "manliness". How old are you? I think some amount of tapering off of sexual activity is to some degree, normal. It sounds ... (read in full...)
A question for the guys, why does he get so jeolous?
Q. hey i just wanna know what the guys think. ok i have a bf for almost 10 months and things do seem to be pretty ok but one thing is his jealousy. i have a guy friend ive known for almost 4 years now and we were startin to think we should do a ...
A. 5 June 2006: Tough love IS what's needed. You have to stick to it too. People who are jealous will try to manipulate things to get you to think it's for the good of the relationship. If your relationship is sound and your boyfriend has no basis for his ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: Don't tell him. He'll never believe you. It's not a believable story, even if it's true. He'll always question it. (( % of people don't get into bed with strangers to sleep or as you say, "just kiss". I'm sure you had other intentions too or ... (read in full...)
He says stop my friendship or he will end the relationship
Q. I have been with my partner for nearly 3 years. We live a little way apart from each other and only see each other twice a week, but we do love each other very much. Last year a man moved in next door to me. There is no attraction there at all but ...
A. 3 June 2006: Since he gave you a choice, choose to dump your boyfriend. This is the beginning of a slippery slope of control. What's next? It's hard to do, but give him the ultimatum and see how he likes it. As I always say, why should you pay the price for ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: They say "what you don't know can't hurt you".... but boy oh boy many people would be floored by what they don't know. OK, you should feel absolutely ASHAMED. Don't tell your boyfriend. I can imagine that conversation..........I spent the night ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: They say "what you don't know can't hurt you".... but boy oh boy many people would be floored by what they don't know. OK, you should feel absolutely ASHAMED. Don't tell your boyfriend. I can imagine that conversation..........I spent the night ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: They say "what you don't know can't hurt you".... but boy oh boy many people would be floored by what they don't know. OK, you should feel absolutely ASHAMED. Don't tell your boyfriend. I can imagine that conversation..........I spent the night ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: They say "what you don't know can't hurt you".... but boy oh boy many people would be floored by what they don't know. OK, you should feel absolutely ASHAMED. Don't tell your boyfriend. I can imagine that conversation..........I spent the night ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: They say "what you don't know can't hurt you".... but boy oh boy many people would be floored by what they don't know. OK, you should feel absolutely ASHAMED. Don't tell your boyfriend. I can imagine that conversation..........I spent the night ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but I slept in another guy's bed
Q. i love my boyfriend but recently things havnt been great, i ended up sleeping in another guys bed and kissing him.we like each other, but hes not single. should i tell my boyfriend? i know it may end things and i dont want that..all that happened ...
A. 3 June 2006: They say "what you don't know can't hurt you".... but boy oh boy many people would be floored by what they don't know. OK, you should feel absolutely ASHAMED. Don't tell your boyfriend. I can imagine that conversation..........I spent the night ... (read in full...)
Is my husbands friend asking about me for the wrong reasons!
Q. My husband has a good friend for about 10 years. His friend lives far away but it seems his friend has a lot of interest in knowing more about me. He has called several times to talk with me knowing my husband wasn't home, everytime he calls and I ...
A. 3 June 2006: If he is truly a friend, then it is normal to be interested in how you are. If he seems to call while your husband is away, that seems a little odd. My wife and I have friends that would call eachother and I would think nothing of it. It depends ... (read in full...)
My relationship is abusive, and I've been unfaithful - what can I do?
Q. what does someone do when there in an abusive relationship,have been unfaithfull,but cant live with the guilt.and cant be honest with there partner but cant leave the abusive relationship cuz there so screwed up?...
A. 3 June 2006: If the relationship is truly abusive, you must leave. If you cheated but don't love your husband it's still wrong. It might make it easier to get over though once you're apart. What type of abuse are we talking about? That word is thrown around ... (read in full...)
Married but exchanging erotic emails with another women
Q. My first cousin's wife and I have been exchanging erotic mails. We are both married and we discuss about sex lives and likes and dislikes. She has kids and I have none. There is a huge age difference between us but she seems comfortable about that. ...
A. 3 June 2006: STOP !... (read in full...)
Boyfriend was late home knowing I am jealous!
Q. I have been seeing a counsellor for my anger and jealousy problems. I used to get mad at my boyfriend a lot, but because of my counselling, I haven't really got mad at him in the last couple months. I've been real proud of myself. On Tuesday my ...
A. 2 June 2006: You really overreacted. First of all, you had him pinned to a 90 minute timeframe. He did the right thing by calling you to tell you he'd be later because his friend was late. That should have put your inquiring mind at ease. YOU thought he'd ... (read in full...)
I'm very jealous of what other women look like! I need help!!!
Q. hello... i have a jealousy problem that is pushing my boyfriend away... i am very jealous of what other girls look like and i don't have what they have... they're so gorgeous... so when a seductive naked girl comes on tv i kind of get upset... i ...
A. 1 June 2006: Hi there. I'm not sure how old you are but I'm assuming you're younger. Here's a life lesson. I've learned a bit along the way. Not everything but a little.
Your boyfriend is with you because he chooses to be with you, until you give him a re... (read in full...)
I cheated by mistake with my Ex, now my man cant forgive me, please help!
Q. Hello all, I ruined my life the other day by cheating on my boyfriend of 2 years. Ive never done anything like it before. Not that this is an excuse but I didnt consciously choose to cheat. I slept at my exes and woke up to him having sex with me....
A. 31 May 2006: OK, yo've been with your current boyfriend for two years. You said your ex had tried this with you a year ago too. What the @#%$ are you thinking? How old are you? I'm sorry for being so blunt but come on, what's going through your head. Number ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to hang out with my ex-husbands family when they come to town? My fiancee was furious! Please advice
Q. Is it wrong to hang out with my ex-husbands family when they come to town. I have 3 children by this man and i took them to stay at a hotel with their grandparents and aunts and cousins. I havent seen these people in 7 years. So i sat with them a ...
A. 30 May 2006: Irish49 is right on the money with this one. This guy is trying to control you and is acting like a child. What will happen when the ring is on your finger? What would he expect you to do, pretend the other side of the family doesn't exist? So, ... (read in full...)
An affair which makes her happy - but what about the fallout?
Q. A question for you all, I think I am far to close to the situation to see straight to be honest. A relation (genuinely! - that is why I have not posted this anon)has been married for 20 years. Their marriage hasd been going stale, but they have fou...
A. 29 May 2006: Hey girlie. I had to dig a little to find this question. If you are really close to this relation, I think you should level with her. There is no doubt what she's doing is wrong. Having said that, you don't know what got her to that point. It's ... (read in full...)
He's become friends with a girl from work! How do I get over my jealousy?
Q. how do i get over my jealousy problem? i have been w?this guy for 8 amazing yrs.sure we've had ups and downs but until about 6mo. ago i was never the jealous type,now i worry myself sick. there is a girl from his work moved in next door they ride ...
A. 28 May 2006: Don't be too possesive but keep your eyes open. Not that you don't trust him but be awre of who is friends are.... (read in full...)
Agony Aunts: Are we too soft with our problems?
Q. Have things become too complicated? Do we try too hard to namby-pamby, silk-glove every type of problem instead of just saying "bite the bullet" and getting on with life ? Being honest is such a panacea (sp?) for all ills. I am serious - I worry ...
A. 26 May 2006: I don't feel I'm too soft. I've been told the opposite actually. I'm pretty balck and white.... (read in full...)
Can I trust my fiancee not to cheat if we get married?
Q. Hi...I'm due to be married in August to a beautiful kind and hardworking lady. We have dated over the last 4.5 years and over that time the only problems we have ever had centre around me being able to trust her. She cheated on me with an ex and ...
A. 25 May 2006: I think if you go ahead with this marriage yo'll end up in big trouble. She's not ready for marriage.... (read in full...)
I think there was a LOT more cheating going on than my wife admits!
Q. I have just found out my wife has cheated on me, but I am not sure as to what extent. She arrived home at 4.30am Monday morning after being out with work colleagues. The next day she was acting strangely and I could tell she was lying about where ...
A. 25 May 2006: I think you're all taking this WAY to lightly. She lied and told her husband one thing and only admitted to JUST kissing another guy when she was caught. She really doesn't deserve the benefit of the doubt. She was making out with another guy. ... (read in full...)
Advice says I should stop before it gets out of hand...But I think it has already! Help
Q. I posted a question about an ex lover of 26 years ago getting in touch with me , I am happily married have been for 21 years, and get this e-mail from my ex . I have read the replys from crying eyes, cos you are telling me to stop before it gets ...
A. 24 May 2006: I went back and read the original post. If your husband already knows about this guy, you're treating him like a fool. Your husband is giving you his trust and thinking nothing of it. MAny men would be uncomfortable with this. On the other hand, ... (read in full...)
Advice says I should stop before it gets out of hand...But I think it has already! Help
Q. I posted a question about an ex lover of 26 years ago getting in touch with me , I am happily married have been for 21 years, and get this e-mail from my ex . I have read the replys from crying eyes, cos you are telling me to stop before it gets ...
A. 24 May 2006: If you're happily married, you'll do the right thing. That's leave this other guy alone. I really can't understand the amount of pain we are capable of putting on the people we're supposed to love. What about all the good times you've shared with ... (read in full...)
I suspect her of cheating, but don't want her to know I snooped to find out!
Q. Hi All I thought I trusted my girlfriend 100% untill today! Let me know what you all think of this please......... Firstly to start of my story I'll rewind a month back, my g/f is out on a work night out. Usually she'll text me a few times etc ...
A. 22 May 2006: Just ask her. But do it by surprise and you'll know by the look on he face. Just say, did you fool around on me with X ? You could also say, what's going on between you and X ? But do it when she least expects it.... (read in full...)
How do I know if he liked the bj I gave him... and does he shave his "shaft" ?
Q. hi, i gave my boyfriend a blow job recently and im not sure how he felt about it. It was my first time so id like ta know how it was for him but we havent really talked about it. We've been together awhile and can talk about almost anything but i ...
A. 22 May 2006: As a guy, I've got to laugh. Who the in the world has a hairy shaft? That would be hilarious.... (read in full...)
C'mon you blokes! How long should it take?
Q. How long does it take a guy to come? My guy takes ages and i was just wondering if it was normal, and if i should be taking it personally....
A. 22 May 2006: I think it depends on what has gone on before penetration. Hours is way off the map of what's normal. I get the impression most guys probably last between 3-10 minutes. It depends on speed etc.... (read in full...)
My married boss wants sex...I love my job and don't want to leave. What should I do?
Q. At the xmas party, i slept with boss, it has taken me a while to get over my own embarrassment and get on with my job and we both agreed to put this behind us. However we still exchange certain looks and yesterday he asked me if I fancied doing so...
A. 21 May 2006: You already no the answer to this. NO MORE SEX !! It's like you're the candy store and it's...... buy one get one free day !! He's married ! You'll see some day that attractions are what get us into a relationship but moral fibre and love are ... (read in full...)
Should I shave it, or not?
Q. I am about to start having oral/full sex with my boyfriend, we have both talked about it and started to experiment but I always stop him before it gets to far, because I always focus on 1 thing. Vaginal pubic hair, I know alot of girls shave it off, ...
A. 21 May 2006: This is all good advice. Martini cuts right to the point. It's true. Blunt, but true. You sound young. That's not bad but depending on your age you might reconsider this entire thing. If this is your first time, you probably don't really know ... (read in full...)
BF's so "protective" that he won't even let me go out with HIM!
Q. My current boyfriend is very protective and doesn't want me to go out with out him. The only time I ever do get to go out is if he's somewhere I can't be. If I ever ask to go out then he ends up getting stroppy and distant, whereas he can go out ...
A. 21 May 2006: These ladies who offered the other posts are 100 % correct. Why should you pay the price for a crime you've never committed? What have you done that should require you to be so submissive to his whims? It will only get worse. \
I'm a man and ... (read in full...)
My stepdad would rather have sex with me than with my mum!
Q. Dear cupid I'm an 18 yr old girl and my problem is that my stepdad raped me a week ago, so my mom kicked me out. I enjoyed having sex with him and he has come to me twice( I'm living in my friend's apartment) and we've had an amazing time but it's...
A. 21 May 2006: I really hope this is not an actual question. PLEASE, folks, when you have a question, give us some more details. Too many blamks lead to too scenarios and possabilities. It's difficult to offer appropriate advice like that.... (read in full...)
Should I worry that a married, flirting friend now wants to get at job at my company?
Q. Background Male acquaintance who is married, And attracted to. I've known him about 18 months. Started off flirting and teasing me. Didn't know he was married to begin with, but when I found out, stopped the flirting, just acted friendly. Couldn...
A. 21 May 2006: Well. I would never suggest looking for another job. He's the one who has to control his actions. Yo're the one who has to put him on that path. You like the attention too. That doesn't make you bad but sometimes flattery allows us to walk in ... (read in full...)
Insecure boyfriend
Q. My bf really has trust issues. He wont let me do anything. i cant even go to the tanning bed because a guy that i used to mess with lives close to there. how can i get him to trust me more?...
A. 20 May 2006: Well you've found out that the truth is the way to go. You're going to have to pay this price for a while BUT, not forever. He shouldn't have been so concerned about your past life. By telling him a lie though you gave him reason to wonder. ... (read in full...)
Trusting again
Q. When you give your significant other a 2nd chance after he's cheated, how do you know how to read the signs if he were to do it again without being paranoid. i mean, i want to forgive him and move on and give him the benefit of the doubt to start ...
A. 20 May 2006: He has to be open and available at all times. He has to answer your questions, all of them. He owes you this much and his debt will be payed when the day comes that you no longer feel the need to ask him things. Until then, this is his ... (read in full...)
Insecure boyfriend
Q. My bf really has trust issues. He wont let me do anything. i cant even go to the tanning bed because a guy that i used to mess with lives close to there. how can i get him to trust me more?...
A. 19 May 2006: Well, you left out the "I LIED" before part. That tells me something about you. So his insecurity is actually somewhat understandable because you gave him reason to have those feelings. Now he's stuck on it. What was the nature of the lie? How ... (read in full...)
Insecure boyfriend
Q. My bf really has trust issues. He wont let me do anything. i cant even go to the tanning bed because a guy that i used to mess with lives close to there. how can i get him to trust me more?...
A. 18 May 2006: You can't change him. Only he can do that. What he's showing you now are signs of a future disaster. Where were you? Who was with you? Who did you talk to? etc. If you put up with this, you'll be paying a price for crimes you never committed, ... (read in full...)
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