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female
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*ll give you everything
writes: hey i just wanna know what the guys think. ok i have a bf for almost 10 months and things do seem to be pretty ok but one thing is his jealousy. i have a guy friend ive known for almost 4 years now and we were startin to think we should do a buisness. my bf got mad at the idea saying its not right and all this stuff. my friend came over earlier today and subsaquently my bf called and he asked who was over he i told him my friend was. he got sooooo mad. and to top it off i accidently called my bf my guy friends name! i really didnt mean to and i covered it up pretty well. why do guys get so jealous???
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male
reader, Lostandalone  +, writes (5 June 2006):
 Its just insecurity. I mean take it like this he can support you or leave you. Those aren't things that you should have to deal with. Whether he knows it he is making you get closer to your friend because he isn't giving you all that you need in the relationship. Besides, I always believe that a person who can't trust is that way because they are not trustworthy. Keep that in mind and Good Luck.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (5 June 2006):
 Your boyfriend suffers from low self-esteem most probably. If you give him no reason to feel threatened by your relationship with your friend and if you give him plenty of attention and reassurance he will feel better about himself and the jealousy will diminish over time. It may take awhile but it can be done. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (5 June 2006):
 Tough love IS what's needed. You have to stick to it too. People who are jealous will try to manipulate things to get you to think it's for the good of the relationship. If your relationship is sound and your boyfriend has no basis for his jealousy, you'll do neither him or yourself any good by giving in to his demands.
By giving in you'll be, in his mind, prooving him to be correct. He's not. He's insecure. What will it be next? If you give in to him this time, he'll expect it the next time too. He's insecure, based on the countless possibilities of what COULD happen between a man and woman. He has to understand that anything could happen any time. There are no guarantees in life. He has to trust you though.
DON'T GIVE IN
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A
male
reader, Wild Thaing +, writes (5 June 2006):
 Honey, please don't generalize jealousy as the sole domain of men. Plenty of women get crazy jealous - I refer you to the movie Fatal Attraction as a facetious example, but you need only scan some posts here to find women who can feel jealousy.
Your boyfriend has trust issues, and only time will make them go away. You cannot make him trust you; he will have to come around to that state on his own. In the meantime don't let his lack of trust control your life. If you think going into business with your guy friend is a sound decision then pursue it, and then give your boyfriend a choice. Tell him he can either support your business decision or find a new girlfriend. Regardless of the choice HE makes, you'll be better off.
For the sake of your career it's time to give your boyfriend some tough love. Good luck and take care.
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