| Latest articles: About Facebook and relationships
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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I'm 14 and pregnant - what will happen to my child, and the father?
Q. I'm 14 and pregnant and i'm not getting rid of it, but if I don't what will happen to the father of my child?, and would social services take it off me? ...
A. 25 February 2011: I understand the pill doesn't agree with you, it's not for everyone, but you should be on a reliable form of birth control especially since it's illegal to be having sex at your age. As well, if he is older than 16 he could be in a ton of trouble. I ... (read in full...)
Is flirting online a form of cheating?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost two years. Our arguments have always been about him flirting with women on Facebook or MySpace. Is that considered cheating if hes flirting online and he tells women he's single? ...
A. 25 February 2011: Cheating, probably not. Being extremely obnoxious and disrespectful, yes.... (read in full...)
What birth control do you use and why?
Q. Birth Control... I'm a virgin, have no desire to get BF yet and I am happy to finish living my childhood for the time being as I know when it's gone I'll miss just been young. But i see alot Qs about BC (birth control) and I'm just curious re...
A. 25 February 2011: I used to be on The Pill as well as NuvaRing once, but they really messed with my hormones. They made me incredibly depressed and I felt nauseous all the time. They also destroyed my sex drive and I lost my ability to orgasm. However, most of my ... (read in full...)
My small boobs are killing my relationships!
Q. Okay I have really big problems with my relationships.. I have very small boobs between size AA and A (not very sure). When I meet a guys who I like, Im scared to let them get close to me. Often guys asking me out and saying that im nice person.....
A. 25 February 2011: A lot of men find small breasts attractive. I don't know any men who aren't total pigs who will only date girls with large breasts. However, I do know many good men who won't date a woman with low self-confidence. Small breasts can be very beautiful ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and pregnant - what will happen to my child, and the father?
Q. I'm 14 and pregnant and i'm not getting rid of it, but if I don't what will happen to the father of my child?, and would social services take it off me? ...
A. 25 February 2011: That depends on how old he is. If he winds up on the birth certificate it's considered an admission of guilt. You are not legally considered able to consent to sex of any kind. Can I ask why you didn't use protection?... (read in full...)
I have a demanding job but he compares me to housewives who cook and clean
Q. Hi: I don't know what to do with my relationship. My bf and I have been fighting for months now. I am not sure what is going on but it seems to be a disagreement on both of us on house chores. We both have very demanding jobs; and it is hard for ...
A. 24 February 2011: He has no right to demand you do more chores than him on the grounds that you are female. Especially if he's not holding up his side of the bargain. It's incredibly sexist and old fashioned. This is 2011, not 1955, right?
To try to fix it, you ... (read in full...)
Will the pain lessen in time, when having sex with my boyfriend???
Q. A few days I slept with my boyfriend for the first time. We had sex five times throughout the evening and morning. I am not a virgin, but have not had sex in just over a year. (He was a virgin.) My first lover was rather small. But when I lost my ...
A. 24 February 2011: It should get easier. You need a lot more foreplay if he's bigger than normal, unfortunately. And you should definitely invest in lube. Good lube. Not the really gross sticky cheap kind. Wetness isn't everything though, you also need to get looser. ... (read in full...)
Will the pain lessen in time, when having sex with my boyfriend???
Q. A few days I slept with my boyfriend for the first time. We had sex five times throughout the evening and morning. I am not a virgin, but have not had sex in just over a year. (He was a virgin.) My first lover was rather small. But when I lost my ...
A. 24 February 2011: Sex should never hurt. It sounds like you're not turned on enough. You should be extremely turned on, especially with a well-endowed partner before you even attempt penetration. Make sure you're spending plenty of time on the foreplay (I heard ... (read in full...)
What matters?
Q. So I've been around with confusion, what matters to a girl? I've heard size. I've heard Technique. I've heard Stamina. Which one is the one that actually matters, I heard size doesn't matter too much as long as you're around 6 in, Technique I have ...
A. 24 February 2011: Most girls don't care as much about penetrative sex as oral sex and foreplay and such. Very few women orgasm from penetrative sex (around 20%), we really don't have that many nerve endings in there. Don't worry so much about size and lasting as ... (read in full...)
Is it okay that he's going swimming with other girls?
Q. Just a general question Is it okay for me to feel a bit insecure about my boyfriend going swimming with other girls? Say 5 girls, 3 boys. Im not too sure why im bothered about it seeing as i dont believe anything would happen at all. Just make...
A. 24 February 2011: To answer both parts of your question, it's fine. It's normal to feel a little jealous or insecure, but it's also fine for him to be going. Don't worry, just the sight of girls in bathing suits isn't going to make him cheat. It's normal to feel a ... (read in full...)
Getting headaches with my new healthy eating regime... is this normal?
Q. I've recently started to eat healthy and cut out all the rubbish that I used to eat. I decided this would be the best way for me to lose weight as I have gained quite alot in the past year. I cut out all the coke and fizzy drinks I used to drink as...
A. 24 February 2011: Yes, it sounds like you're suffering caffeine withdrawal (it's addicting stuff). The same thing happened to me when I stopped drinking soda. I started drinking caffeinated tea instead and the headaches disappeared.... (read in full...)
Pregant and scared of my dad's reaction...
Q. i am 10 weeks pregnant and it has just started to sink in after finding out a few weeks ago. My partner in over joyed and i told my mum the other day who is also pleased at becoming a grandmother. However she did say that my dad will be sad and ...
A. 23 February 2011: You are a full grown woman. You and your partner are happy, you sound like this is something you want. Grow some high balls and woman up! Send him a card telling him how excited you are. I bet he'll be thrilled to be a granddad. This should be a ... (read in full...)
Why did my wife get upset when I saw a topless sunbather on a beach?
Q. This may be a funny question to ask but my wife got so mad on a trip we took to Mexico when we saw a woman laying out topless. Why is that? I am not the guy who makes comments about other women or takes long stares at them; I have always been very ...
A. 22 February 2011: She's feeling insecure, everyone feels insecure sometimes. Don't mention it again unless she brings it up. Very kind of you to look the other way. She's projecting her insecurity onto you. It's easier for her to deal with I think, if she can blame ... (read in full...)
I'm am taking medication to gain weight, but I need support, as well! What should I do?
Q. I'm a 23 year old married female. I've always been thin just like my father. He has trouble gaining weight and I now am having the same issues. I'm 5'5 and weigh 97 pounds. My ideal weight is and was 120-125. I try to eat as much as I can, but ...
A. 22 February 2011: My friend had the same trouble as you. I noticed she ate a LOT of carbs, pasta and bread a lot. She ate five meals a day, and always had something to snack on. Make sure you have snacks around (they should still be healthy though, since extremely ... (read in full...)
What does it mean when a man gives you a drawer?
Q. I have a man I'm seeing long distance. We started this relationship in early November We are two hours apart... we email and talk on the phone a few times a week... I go to visit him since he cannot be around my dogs. I have been up to see h...
A. 22 February 2011: I think he was saying that jokingly, but at the same time offering closet space and a drawer means he's very serious about committing to you, but like CindyCares said, don't go buying a wedding dress, but it does mean he's interested in a more ... (read in full...)
Is it good to stop masterbating?
Q. i used to watch porn to make myself feel a bit better but now i have stopped because it always made me feel guilty, also i feel it ruins sex experience. is it good for me to stop masterbating? ...
A. 22 February 2011: Masturbation is completely different from porn. Unless you are masturbating to the point where it's interfering with your life, then masturbation is healthy. It definitely puts you in a better mood for one thing and it's the safest sex you can ... (read in full...)
Porn video sent to me, how will g/f react?
Q. ive been with my girlfriend for over 1 year and 6 months and she wanted me to give up p*rn after we first had intercourse which i understand but i failed about 4 times breaking her heart which made me relise what a twat ive been about it and for ...
A. 17 February 2011: Why does she need to know if it's just this one spam?
I find it pretty disturbing that he decided to stop watching porn because it bothered his girlfriend and rather than answer his question, people are encouraging him to start watching porn aga... (read in full...)
Do I tell my fiance that I had an affair and the baby may or may not be his?
Q. I have been with my fiancé for 4 years and we are to be married June. We have a great relationship but I recently made a mistake and had a brief sexual relationship with a co-worker. It was over the span of 2 weeks, and it actually brought me closer ...
A. 16 February 2011: Paternity tests can be done during pregnancy. Since it actually does seem like it's your fiancé's (you said the guy was infertile, and you used condoms, and you were using a very unreliable form of contraception with your fiancé), I really wouldn't ... (read in full...)
Lonely on valentines day
Q. i am 13-15 and ive been singled for a year and only had one boyfriend. im not the prettiest girl around but not that ugly either. valentines day is coming up and i need a boyfriend. how do i find the guy right for me. help. thanks...
A. 13 February 2011: If you try to desperately find yourself a guy just for valentine's day, I guarantee you will be more miserable than being alone. It's just one day, it's not important in the grand scheme of things or in the grand scheme of love. You're still very ... (read in full...)
I want to use my 2" thick dildo but I can't because it hurts
Q. Hey, I'm 17 and I've been exploring myself for a year or so now. I really like masturbating, but I can only fit 1 finger in, and I want more. When I try 2 fingers, I am actually able to get them both in, but it's really tight and kind of hurts when ...
A. 13 February 2011: Actually, losing your virginity won't stretch you out or anything of the sort. Though you may break your hymen, if it hasn't broken already, but tightness has nothing to do with being a virgin. The reason it feels like that is that you aren't turned ... (read in full...)
What are the advantages/disadvantages of the implant?
Q. Is it true with the implant you have like year period or something? what are the disadvantages?...
A. 13 February 2011: You can't know what your reaction will be, but no it will not cause you to bleed for a year. Most people report the opposite. You will most likely stop having regular periods and instead get irregular spotting. It is very effective, and allows you ... (read in full...)
Is pullling out with a condom safe?
Q. me and my boyfriend and i want to be the safest we lke can so if he pulls out whilst wearing a condom will that reduce chances even more?...
A. 13 February 2011: You don't need to pull out wearing a condom, I'd imagine in the heat of the moment that could actually pull the condom off occasionally making it ineffective. With proper use condoms are actually very effective, but the pill, depo shot, implant, or ... (read in full...)
Bisexual, in a relationship but want to experiment more...
Q. Ok so I'm bisexual and I've known since I was young, around 12/13. I watch lesbian porn but to me that does not determine my sexuality or anybody else's for that matter. but what I do want to do is experiment more with other girls but I'm already in ...
A. 12 February 2011: Everyone gets urges to be with other people sometimes. It doesn't make a difference what gender the other person is, you don't get one of each gender. You can either stay with your boyfriend, or you can break up with him to be with someone else. ... (read in full...)
There's always a reason not to have sex with my wife!
Q. So I am having trouble approaching the lack of sex that my wife and I have been experiencing. I am in the mood almost every night (except if I masturbated 1-2 days before, in those cases I could take it or leave it. Or if she is wearing her big ...
A. 12 February 2011: Well you can't exactly expect her to do all the worrying about kids/taking care of the kids, and then expect her to have the energy for sex. Among married couples the vast majority of housework falls onto women. The most recent numbers I saw were ... (read in full...)
How painful is bikini-waxing?
Q. dear cupid, soo, i'm pretty sure that this question has been asked on here before, because i know a lot of girls who are trying to figure out the exact same thing. i'm looking for hair-removal methods for the bikini area...BESIDES shaving. i curre...
A. 8 February 2011: Much much worse. I mean someone is pouring hot wax on very sensitive bits and ripping your hair out. It's not a massage! Much worse than eyebrows. I did it twice and can't see why anyone would ever do it, but it was the smoothest the area has ever ... (read in full...)
Female Orgasm Questions
Q. Ladies, this question is obviously for you. I just have some basic questions regarding the dynamic of female gasms. Please take the time to read and answer the whole question 1. Can all women experience G-Spot orgasms? If so, do som...
A. 8 February 2011: Usually women can't orgasm from only g-spot stimulation without the addition of clitoral stimulation. Different women react differently to different stimulation, so she may just not find it that earth shattering. Really an orgasm is an orgasm is an ... (read in full...)
HE'S doing things he would never accept from me!!!
Q. Dear cupids, advice please cos I'm hurting :( My boyfriends 33 I'm 23. I deleted my Facebook cos he was always jealous when old friends tried adding me etc. To cut a long story short he is very jealous and controlling. Anyways when I was on Faceb...
A. 7 February 2011: "Am I making a big deal over nothing here?"
No you are right to be upset. He's acting completely disrespectful and selfish. I'd dump him and move on if I were you. I'm sure you can do much much better.... (read in full...)
Severe lower back pain during sex???
Q. severe lower pack pain during sex .... it never happened before but last night me and my boyfriend got into a deep passionate sex session... it was amazing... till i got on top of him facing his feet, i felt sharp shooting pain to my lower back.. k...
A. 7 February 2011: You probably pulled a muscle, it will continue to hurt for a few weeks. You should take anti-inflammatory medication (aleve is good for this) according to bottle directions. You should also alternate cold and heat on it while it hurts to relieve ... (read in full...)
I feel like I am not pure enough for my husband?
Q. First of all can I say This is my friends account but I am really a female! Hello Eveyone I feel like I did my husband wrong. Im the only he has ever had sex with. I am the only person he has ever loved and same goes for me as he is the only per...
A. 6 February 2011: Your worth and value has nothing to do with the number of sexual partners you've had. There is no physical difference between a virgin and a non-virgin except that your hymen is broken, and even in a virgin it can break earlier. The concept of ... (read in full...)
I don't know whether I had my first kiss yesterday.
Q. Hi guys, this may be a really silly question but i dont know if i had my first kiss yesterday. Basically me and a guy were cuddling and touching noses and occasionally our lips touch but we didnt do anything like move them etc. So i was thinkin is...
A. 6 February 2011: Sounds like a kiss to me! You don't have to be making out to kiss.... (read in full...)
HE'S doing things he would never accept from me!!!
Q. Dear cupids, advice please cos I'm hurting :( My boyfriends 33 I'm 23. I deleted my Facebook cos he was always jealous when old friends tried adding me etc. To cut a long story short he is very jealous and controlling. Anyways when I was on Faceb...
A. 6 February 2011: Sounds like this guy is very over-the-top controlling. He's made it very clear that he's very hypocritical and that he's not going to change, so if this behavior hurts your feelings (and it would hurt most people's) you should leave and find someone ... (read in full...)
Is it a bad thing that we're always kissing???
Q. Is it bad that my girlfriend and I are constantly making out? We're always holding hands, and snuggling and kissing... Mah bro's say we do it a lot, and I never really noticed. My question is, is that bad? to always be kissing?...
A. 6 February 2011: You're probably in the "honeymoon phase" of your relationship, which entails not being able to keep your hands off each other. Is it bad? Yes and no. It's not bad to be crazy attracted to each other. It is bad to do so in public, to the point where ... (read in full...)
I had a termination 24 hours ago and already he's wanting sex!!!
Q. i just have a quick question, i just had an abortion 24 hours ago, and for anybody that dont know how an abortion feels is painful, cramping feeling, and constant bleeding, my stupid ass boyfriend is asking me to please him sexually regardless of ...
A. 6 February 2011: My goodness, that is one of the most selfish things I've ever heard. What a pig. I'm sorry, but there's no other way to say it. He is being a selfish jerk. It's beyond selfish, it's a horrible thing to do. Next time he has the flu pester him to ... (read in full...)
I want to explore having sex with a man but my girlfriend won't allow it
Q. Dear cupid. I am 24 year old and am currently in a relationship with a woman. we have a pretty healthy sex life and love each other like crazy. i've never had sex with men in my whole life, and im certain that i won't feel for men. i knew i'm gay ...
A. 4 February 2011: It doesn't matter if it's with a man, it's not like you get one of each gender! Cheating is cheating. A bit of natural curiosity is normal, but acting on it is cruel to your current partner. Justify it how you will, but you just want to cheat. If ... (read in full...)
Is watching porn while your in a relationship a form of cheating?
Q. Is watching porn while your in a relationship a form of cheating? I've found out my boyfriend has watched porn a few times and confronted him about it. I told him that I feel degraded when he looks at that stuff because he has ME, so why should he ...
A. 4 February 2011: Somewhere between 55-75% of women dislike porn in their relationship (the lowest percentage I've seen is about 55 and the highest is 90) and somewhere between 25 and 50% of women consider it flat out cheating.
This is clearly not somethin... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is obsessed with my ex!
Q. My girlfriend is obsessed with an ex of mine. Shes friends with her and they get along fine when they see each other but shes always comparing herself to her. Last night they ran into each other while out with friends and from 10pm to 3am, i'v...
A. 4 February 2011: In continuing to reassure her, you are enabling her bad behavior. In a way basically by trying to be nice, you're inviting more of this. You need to sit her down and tell her that you are with her, not your ex, and that is for a reason. And then you ... (read in full...)
She says the sex with another man is just for relief, nothing else
Q. i met a girl 4 months ago at a friends birthday,shes amazingly attractive and fun to be with,after a few dates we started having sex and is really good sex full of passion and shes very open minded,shes 27 im 29. she told me from the start about he...
A. 4 February 2011: She works as a high class prostitute. You knew this from the start, and if that's not something you can live with, leave. She was up front with this, so it's not something you can be angry with her for. It may help you to know most prostitutes hate ... (read in full...)
My man is very selfish in the bedroom
Q. Ok? Another question. My man is very selfish in the bedroom. He never touches me in any place. He doesnt do anything dirty. He doesnt do oral, only like once a week and i have to beg for that. He never touches my vagina in any way. LIke he thinks ...
A. 4 February 2011: He's refusing to change because his exes, who left him, didn't complain? Since when were relationships that didn't work out the golden standard for comparison? He's clearly being a selfish jerk (and delusional). He's not with his exes (maybe for ... (read in full...)
Horrific noises during sex are really embarrassing me!
Q. So, I'm in a new relationship and he's the biggest I've ever been with. He likes to eat me out, or go down on me or whatever, but whenever he does, my vagina makes this farting noise. It's completely embaressing for me, and completely takes me out ...
A. 4 February 2011: It's called queefing and it happens to almost everyone. It's just trapped air escaping and no, there's no way to hold it in or stop it. Most say it gets worse in positions where there is deep penetration, like doggy or girl on top. I'm sure he ... (read in full...)
Help!!! Is my boyfriend addicted to porn?
Q. My boyfriend of one year is addicted to porn. Well I think he is. I used to think it was ok but now I'm not so sure. WE used to watch porn together and have fun with it but lately it seems that he prefers to please himself to porn rather than being ...
A. 1 February 2011: Most in the field define compulsive user as over 10 hours per week. That's the arbitrary cut-off.
It's obviously interfering with every aspect of your relationship, it's hurting you emotionally, it's getting in the way of your sex life, it's dam... (read in full...)
What are "the jealous rules"?
Q. i always wondered what are the jealous rules when it comes to being in a relationship and having the opposite sex as friends?.. i mean is it ok to be with my bf and sometimes hang out with my guyfriends, is it okay to text them but only as friends ...
A. 31 January 2011: He sounds like he has some serious jealousy/insecurity issues. He flirts with (and nearly cheats with) an ex, but gets angry at you for having friends? He needs to work on his issues before this relationship can move forward. It's unfair of him to ... (read in full...)
My fiance has online profile looking for discreet casual sex!
Q. I have been with my Fiancee for 3 years. We are both in our 40's. A few months ago he was in a car accident and was house bound for three months. During that time, he got very upset with me for not giving him more time and attention while he ...
A. 31 January 2011: If the difficult times were that bad for him that he needed other women, he would have broken up with you. He was looking to cheat. What happens later in life when you hit a rough patch (not if, but when) and when your sex life hits a slow point ... (read in full...)
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