A
female
age
26-29,
*olly14
writes:I'm 14 and pregnant and i'm not getting rid of it, but if I don't what will happen to the father of my child?, and would social services take it off me? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (25 February 2011):
 I understand the pill doesn't agree with you, it's not for everyone, but you should be on a reliable form of birth control especially since it's illegal to be having sex at your age. As well, if he is older than 16 he could be in a ton of trouble. I gather you don't want an abortion, but have you thought about giving it up for adoption? Is raising this child at 14 really in the best interest for the child? Raising a kid is extremely time consuming and expensive. You should be finishing school, not staying up all night with a crying baby. You should look up the number for a women's clinic and make an appointment to talk to them about all your options.
A
female
reader, SweetSmoochy +, writes (25 February 2011):
 Oh hunny. You should have used protection. Hopefully you will in the future.
You can put the baby up for adoption, if that's what you mean by social services "taking it off you". You say the boy is 14 yrs old, so both of you are under the legal age of consent. I'm not sure what the implications of that are.
Best of luck
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A
female
reader, wornoutmommy +, writes (25 February 2011):
 I'm not sure how britan is different from the us, but I had a baby when I was 17 (underage here). Social services played a role through all of my doc visits to make sure everything was going to be ok for me and baby. I had parental and b/f support, so I wasn't in need of their help much- but it is there.
I would call a hospital to set up doc visits immediately. Start taking some folic acid and prenatal vitamins as well- these help with development of the child. Its hard enough to have a baby when you're young- it would be even harder if the child has developmental issues. If you smoke/drink or do any drugs- stop immediately! I know it is a stigma that young moms face, and some simply have sex but don't use all those things. Put on a brave face- you are carrying life inside of you and in most countries, you are the exact age women start doing that.
When you go in for your doc visit, explain that you need social services help- they can either refer you or may even have some one visit with you right away. This will get you set up with medical insurance as well- something you'll definitely need! If you are not able to stay with your b/f, ask grandparents/aunts/uncles etc... If that is not an option, locate a women's shelter in your area. These shelters would also help get you the social services and medical care that you need right now- and provide a place to stay/eat and help you go to school as well.
One thing you need to admit (as did I) is that this was very irresponsible. But because you made an irresponsible choice doesn't mean you need to keep making them; this is your time to 'grow up' and be mature. Make sure you do so, for your child's sake.
Msg me if you have any other ?s, I've been down this road- and she just turned 9 today :)
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (25 February 2011):
 i think you will be allrite find a support group to get information on what to do you have to tell your parents hopefully they will support you aswell
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A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb +, writes (25 February 2011):
 You are FOURTEEN years old?? Ok, just making sure I read that correctly.....
Is the father of your child supportive of you or is he long gone? If he is still with you and is supportive, and since you have been kicked out of your home, might I suggest maybe living with the father of your child and his parents?
Nothing else I can think of to add, sorry. You are underage, so this makes this situation quite messy.
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A
female
reader, kind_hearted_stranger +, writes (25 February 2011):
if you live in a safe, stable home and have support from a parent or guardian then your baby will be able to stay with you. You will however require a significant amount of support. Have you told your parent or guardian? This is not something you can go through alone.
As you should know, the legal age of consent in the uk is 16 so you have been incredibly irresponsible and have broken the law by having sex at your age. How old is the father of your baby?
I do hope you will think more carefully about the consequences of your actions in the future and will remember that not only should you use condoms to protect you against pregnancy, they should be used to protect from sexually transmitted infections.
Kind_hearted_stranger
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A
male
reader, vospie +, writes (25 February 2011):
 If the father is over 16, he will be in a lot of trouble. Especially if he is over 18, he'll end up going to prison. Social services won't take your baby away cos you're 14 but they will if they think you will be an unsafe mother. I don't know that they have any reason to suspect that you are unsafe. You will need your parents support. Have you told them? Do yoiu get on with them? Is the father being supportive, also?
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A
female
reader, Holly14 +, writes (25 February 2011):
Holly14 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe don't like it and the rod or pill doesnt agree with me and he's14 so what would happen? And I have no parental support I have been kicked out
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A
female
reader, Holly14 +, writes (25 February 2011):
Holly14 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe don't like it and the rod or pill doesnt agree with me and he's14 so what would happen?
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (25 February 2011):
That depends on how old he is. If he winds up on the birth certificate it's considered an admission of guilt. You are not legally considered able to consent to sex of any kind. Can I ask why you didn't use protection?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2011): What do you mean "what will happen to the father"? Is he older than you? If he is and you're a minor he could get in a lot of trouble.
Social services would only take the baby away if they thought it was in danger or not being looked after properly.
Do you have your parents support?
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A
female
reader, maddiee-maii +, writes (25 February 2011):
You need to tell you gardians first of all..
secondly your answer - if the farther of your child is over the age of 16, then he can get done by the police depending on what cercumstances you are in at the moment, and your baby should not get took off u so long as you are in a stable enviroment, safe enviroment and your parents suport you ect...
so long as the baby is safe, well looked after and loved then you should still be able to keep it
but i dont know your cercumstances
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