A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I are very interested in swinging. I have been wanting to try this for years and now that we have discussed it for some time now we both are anxious to get into the game! I have a little fear though. I am small, height, weight and "otherwise". My husband is average and even them vigorous or "rough" sex can be sometimes too much for me. A group we are thinking of joinging has six couples. You rotate among the couples. A good friend of mine is in the club and has told me two off the guys are quite large. I would be expected to have sex with these gentlemen, and I want to try, but I do have the reservations. Any body else confronted this scenario?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2010): Tonight is our first swingers meeting in the group we joined, I am excited and nervous at the same time, mostly excited.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2009): Thanks to all whom have posted, and I WANT TO HEAR FROM
OTHERS. I was sexually active before I got married, quite active, but I never came across a really large penis in length. Almost all were in a close range of length, with some differences in width, and yes, even though I got sore I enjoyed the fat ones :) I said in my original post I am a little concerned about a big (long) one, but it is fun to think about. If you read my first reply post you will see that I am sure I will have my chance.
All posts have been appreciated, especially the anon reader who is a tightie too! I have never had anyone complain about it either! Thanks again.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): I know what you mean-- I'm a tightie too! Appreciated by all my guys, past and present, but can get oweee after some rough play or an extended session. If I've gone through a dry spell, getting back into intercourse I feel like being a virgin all over again. A tight one is a mixed blessing! :P
I'm curious though-- have you ever been diagnosed with vaginismus? Was comfortable inserting a diaphragm? Own a vibrator? Have been usually comfortable with pelvic exams and pap tests? If so, maybe all you need is the lube.
Do you own a vibrator? Playing with one or two (of various sizes) can be fun, and you can do that with your husband. Maybe would decide it's more fun than swinging, eh? :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): Even the guy with experience in swinging is telling you this is a bad idea. That probably means something.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2009): I hope I didn't come across as "chicken". I am probably letting my size fears interfear with my wants. This is actually a pretty good group. Everyone is checked for their health every year and pledges they do not have sex outside the group. These are professonal folks. I called my friend who is a memeber of the group and shared your kind responses and who said (and already knew) this is not a group gangbang, just one on one. She agreed with the post about the lube, that it is absolutely necessary (the more I sit here and think about that the more horny I get!!!!!). My husband is as excited as I am. We get our blood work done Monday and sign our paper work and the next "meeting" is the following weekend. Wonder who I will get first?!?!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (29 December 2009):
 Your vagina can expand to be freaking enormous. When aroused it expands significantly. With enough lube and if you're turned on enough, you can fit a fist in. That's why it feels "ridged" inside. It's like an accordion. A penis should be fine (yes even a big one), just bring some lube. If vigorous sex causes problems, it's likely not a size thing, it's probably a lubrication thing. It's a common misconception that if you're enjoying yourself you'll stay lubed for the entire sex act, but it's just not true. So remember, lube, and foreplay.
Also make sure you really want to do this.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (29 December 2009):
 I am an advice columnist for swinger magazines, and have experience with the lifestyle myself. I have also done a number of interviews with people in the swinger lifestyle.
You can listen to them all for free at:
http://www.franktalks.com/radio
Entering a swinger circle as you say where you are "expected" to eventually swap with all of the six other couples is not for the novice or beginner couple.
It is best reserved for more experienced swingers that have gotten over beginner jitters. Such a circle requires major levels of trust (that they have not earned from you, and vice versa) and might have imposed restrictions on who else you and your husband want to learn and experiment with outside the circle. Often swinger circles tend to get out of hand when they start with initiations (like having to be penetrated by all the members of the circle during your first time).
In swinger circles, the set up is such that everyone MUST have sex with everyone, and as beginners you and your husband might encounter couples of individuals that you would not want to have sex with, but would feel pressure to conform. This is NOT the place for beginners in this lifestyle. Your "friend" sounds like a recruiter for fresh meat.
Be careful.
-Frank Kermit
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A
female
reader, Carrot2000 +, writes (29 December 2009):
 Being that the vagina can expand to accommodate a baby, a penis shouldn't be too much of a problem! :-)
Seriously, bring some extra lube and try different positions (doggy-style works). If you're really turned on, you'll have less of a problem, so foreplay is a must.
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