| Latest articles: About Facebook and relationships
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...
Is Pornography cheating?
This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...
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My period cravings make me feel terrible!
Q. Everytime I'm on my period, I have immense cravings for salt and chocolate. I know that its a usual craving, but its all i can think about! My favorite foods can be served and I'll still only want chocolate and potato chips. Its all I can think ...
A. 4 February 2012: As you get older they'll become less and less. The extreme end would be to get on birth control and control the hormones a bit. The less extreme end would be to take your mind off it. I find it helps to chew gum.... (read in full...)
I am struggling to cope with my demanding new job and my boyfriend keeps suspecting me of having an affair. Help!
Q. I started a job in an open plan office and we get performance assessments based on productivity. My previous job I had my own office and managed my own time. I didn't discuss it with my boyfriend beforehand, I only told him once I had been ...
A. 4 February 2012: Consequences? What kind of consequences? Your guy is being a control freak. You're WORKING and you have every right to be putting your all into your new job. Yes you probably should discuss new jobs with your partner, but if it happens really fast ... (read in full...)
My partner slept with her ex-boyfriend and now I feel bad when I'm near her.
Q. I would be grateful of your thoughts. My partner walked out last April without saying a word. In July she took the lease on a rented flat and said that she had realised she still wanted to be with me. In the same month she had sex with her ...
A. 4 February 2012: So even if she's trying to get around the idea of cheating, do you want a partner who breaks up with you regularly to go have sex with other men? You should leave her, find someone else, and NOT come back.... (read in full...)
Does it sound as though he likes me as more than a friend? Should I make it clear I don't?
Q. I have a potential problem on my hands... I hope someone on here can help! I have been friends with a guy for about two years. We get on really great and to be honest, I don't know what I would do without him. I am not, however, sexually attracted ...
A. 4 February 2012: Sounds like maybe he likes you but is unaware that it's showing through. Unless his behavior is irritating or creepy, don't comment on it. He doesn't seem to be behaving inappropriately and he has a girlfriend, so unless he asks you out or ... (read in full...)
Should I find a way to text this friend?
Q. okay, first things first. i'm engaged to my wonderful fiance, who i love with all my heart, and i would never cheat on him, just to make that clear. he lives in another country, but that is somewhat irrelevant. anyways, i met this other guy through ...
A. 4 February 2012: You're playing with fire here. If you don't intend to hook up with him, you're leading him on. If you do, you're cheating on our fiancé. Either way, it's not good... You're engaged, you can't be going out flirting with every guy who's interested in ... (read in full...)
Ideas for a first date?
Q. My friend has set me up with one of her friends from college and were going to meet up in a few weeks to go on like a double date, but we cant decide on any good ideas for a first date. Any ideas?...
A. 4 February 2012: Dinner and ice skating, a movie, a trip to a museum, sledding if it's snowy, mini golf, find some kind of greenhouse/indoor plant anything and walk around, be creative!... (read in full...)
How do I make myself look older? People tell me I look about 17!
Q. Hi everyone this is not a relationship question didn't know where else to ask I'm 25 but everyone tells me I look about 17 I'm almost 26 I'm going out tomorrow night on a date and I have nothing to prove my age do you women know any tips to make ...
A. 3 February 2012: Bring ID? Nothing you can do to prove your age. Why not just tell him?... (read in full...)
Should I just ask for her number next time and contact her? She has my number but never got in touch....
Q. Ladies, If you have a good convo with a guy you just met and he leaves you his number do you contact him? Just wondering cause I met a girl at uni last semester and we talked a while and she put my number in her phone (never contacted) and I saw her ...
A. 3 February 2012: I think if she wanted to get in touch she would have. Sounds like she's trying to nicely hint that she's not interested. Sorry.... (read in full...)
Too shy to ask my boyfriend to kiss me! Help!
Q. Hi I'm 13 and i am shy around my bf and i really want him to kiss me any advice???...
A. 3 February 2012: Why not just lean in really close like you're about to kiss him?... (read in full...)
In real life I've never wanted him to kiss me. So is my dream telling me otherwise?
Q. I just turned 18 and im having some confusing feelings. I see one of my mates twice a week (all-day) with a few of our other friends, but I was recently really annoyed by him and vice a versa. We sorted it out last week and that night I had a drea...
A. 3 February 2012: Dreams are just a reflection of the very last thing you were thinking about as you dozed off. You were probably thinking about the fight. People have dreams about kissing other people and having sex with other people ALL the time, doesn't mean they ... (read in full...)
I found my boyfriend's logged in on multiple sex sites but he swears it wasnt him, just a hacker using his details. Is that even possible?
Q. ok so here it goes, last year i found something on my bf laptop by accident he was sitting next to me and i asked wat it was,i logged into it coz his face was strange and it brought me to a profile with all his details on a fuck buddie site, logged ...
A. 3 February 2012: I'm sorry this is happening, but there is no way this was a hacker. He is lying through his teeth. I'm so sorry. There is NO possible way a hacker did this. His brother is covering for him because they are family. You need to get away from this ... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 3 February 2012: That's horniness, nothing whatsoever to do with sperm production though. Women get irritable and horny and have sex dreams when they don't orgasm for awhile too. It's not a male thing.... (read in full...)
Would it be safe to have oral sex after my boyfriend's cold sore is gone?
Q. My boyfriend has a cold sore on his lip and it just made me wonder if we have oral sex long after it's gone (we've not had it yet and aren't planning it yet either) and we have no STI's, would it still be safe to have oral sex without forms of ...
A. 2 February 2012: It's possible, though not very likely. Almost everyone is already a carrier of that virus anyways. You should check with a doctor to find out how to be safer.... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 2 February 2012: You're not a "selfish bitch." This situation is exactly the same as back when men used to regularly visit prostitutes. They made the same arguments and the same "biology" excuses and women were forced to put up with it no matter how they felt, and ... (read in full...)
Urinary incontinence during sex. Help!
Q. I have a rather embarrassing question... During an intimate lovemaking session with my fiancee, I was blindfolded, and had earmuffs on so I couldn't hear anything..this allowed me to focus only on what I was feeling...and I was lost in the sensatio...
A. 1 February 2012: You certain it was urine and not ejaculate? The first time I "squirted" I was certain I'd wet my bed. There was a LOT and just felt like I'd peed a massive amount. It was really embarrassing until I realized it was definitely ejaculating and not ... (read in full...)
Is phone sex cheating?
Q. I cant stop thinking of cheating on my boyfriend .I had phone sex with another man and it turned me on ,totally!! . Is something wrong with me ? Is phone sex cheating ?I wanted to be in a open relationship and he said he will think about it ....Am I...
A. 31 January 2012: Generally in a monogamous relationship yes, unless you have some special agreement otherwise. Just because it really turns you on doesn't mean it's OK. Either you have to trust him not to cheat or leave, not cheat to get even.... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 31 January 2012: I like this series a lot. Was the first thing I read when I started to decide something was not right about what was going on, particularly what I saw from arguments here. I was a user of it at the time. http://rageaga... (read in full...)
We are friends, but now..he wants to have sex! What should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, So my friend and I have known each other for about 2 years now and we hang out a lot. Our relationship kinda swerves from being platonic to romantic(in a silly way)frequently but I never really thought much of it. Until last week whe...
A. 31 January 2012: You shouldn't have sex with him because you're afraid you'll lose a friend. If he can't gracefully accept that you don't want to have sex, he's not a friend anymore at all. ... (read in full...)
My bf gets mad and stresses me out! Should I break up with him?
Q. My boyfriend and I always quarrel,he just gets angry at me. he wants to see me everyday day but he sometimes kicks me out. I always cry, he stresses me. should I carry on with him or what? ...
A. 31 January 2012: Why would you want to stay in a relationship that makes you stressed and unhappy? When you're unhappy more often than you're happy, it's time to go.... (read in full...)
How do women do it all? Work, cook, clean.... I'm exhausted!
Q. How do you women do it all? I have highly stressful job. When I get home I am exhausted. I have no energy to do anything else but lay down on the coach and watch TV. My fiance lives with me and he is constantly pushing me to do more. He wants me ...
A. 31 January 2012: Have you thought about trying to divide housework? It's not the 50's anymore. If you both work, you should both do equal housework. Here's a good article on it.
http://www.uic.edu/orgs/cwluherstory/CWLUArchive/polhousework.html... (read in full...)
It seems like sex is a chore for her, how can we improve things?
Q. I've been in a relationship with my gf for 10 months now. We've lived with each other for 6. The problem for me is the almost non existent passion/sex intimacy.now the problem isn't so much the lack of regular sex as that doesnt worry me so much, ...
A. 31 January 2012: Just from your description, it sounds like she's not enjoying sex, but could be mistaken. Does she have an EASY (that part is important) orgasm every time or almost every time you have sex?
I agree a sex life is important.... (read in full...)
My wife had a termination 6 months into our relationship, and now 7 and a half years later the sex is still terrible!
Q. Hi, me and my first love have just got married 5months ago, we have been together for 8 years nearly and have never slept or even been out with anyone else! We are only in our early and mid 20's. For the first year the sex was great and very ...
A. 31 January 2012: Can you go see a counselor or get her to go see one? How about talking about better methods of birth control, if she's scared she'll get pregnant again?... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 31 January 2012: "just read that porn is a contributing factor in almost 50% of divorces..."
Actually it's slightly OVER 50%.
"If that's the case then why is your anti-porn opinion more important than his? If it works both ways then why are you not addressing t... (read in full...)
Performance anxiety is preventing us from having sex, help?
Q. Hello all. I posted once on here already describing some awkward sexual issues with my girlfriend, and now that things have played out a bit since then, I wanted to re-address things. My girlfriend and I are both virgins, in a committed, lovin...
A. 31 January 2012: 1) You don't need a backup as long as she takes the pill consistently. She should consider getting an IUD if you're very nervous it's not enough on its own, they are a little more effective and you can't forget to take it.
2) Not as easy or sexy ... (read in full...)
More porn = less sex. What's not to get?
Q. Just wanted to put an opinion out there... I have posted questions and answers about porn, spoken to girlfriends and read endless articles about men and womens views on porn. One thing seems glaringly obvious yet so often overlooked by me...
A. 31 January 2012: Cognitive dissonance? A lot of men started using porn long before they were in relationships and literally have no baseline or sense of "normal" to go off of. If they've been using it their entire adolescent lives, what other option can they compare ... (read in full...)
He's ok to do things when I"m on my period, I'm not!
Q. So me and my boyfriend were fooling around, having a good time, clothes on, and he went to put his hands in my pants, but I said no because I'm on my period, which I think is gross, and I thought he'd be grossed out when I told him, but he told me ...
A. 30 January 2012: They offer free samples of them if you go email them on the website if you were wanting to try them out. I've never actually paid for them but have a small stack from all the samples.... (read in full...)
Any suggestions on how to whiten badly discoloured teeth?
Q. I hate my smile. I dont naturally smile with my teeth anyway, but if I laugh you can see them. My face looks horrible when I smile/laugh but looks fine when I haven't got any expression. My teeth are horrible, they are yellow and discoloured, my ...
A. 30 January 2012: Unfortunately if your enamel is damaged crowns/veneers are the only thing that will work. They do need to be replaced, but it's not uncommon for people to get 20+ years out of them. Lumineers are a bit cheaper. There are also things call Snap on ... (read in full...)
Which plans should I cancel; those with my mum or my date?
Q. What should i do? It's my mum's birthday tomorrow, and we are supposed to be going shopping in the afternoon, and the cinema at night, but this guy i am dating said he wants to meet tomorrow too. Should i go to the cinema with my mum in the afte...
A. 30 January 2012: If you knew it was your mom's birthday, why did you agree to meet him in the first place? Just because it's the first time he suggested, doesn't mean you have to agree to it! Do not cancel on your mom, that would be terrible.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is angry with me for wanting to go on a diet
Q. ive been thinking about going on celebrity slim diet, my friend went on it and she lost loads of weight, so i asked her about it, and she mentioned it to my boyfriend at work and he went mad at me.. Its nice to know he likes me how i am, but this is ...
A. 30 January 2012: He has no right to be angry at you for wanting to lose weight. HOWEVER, those diets are not a good way to lose weight. You may drop the weight quickly, but you'll gain it back even faster. The only way to both lose weight and keep it off is to ... (read in full...)
Is there really a 'generic' cheaper Viagra or like name brand men can buy?
Q. Is there really a generic Viagra or like name brand men can buy? Does anyone in the U.S. know of a tried and true ID pill that really works...not the fake stuff that claims to grow your penis. We have been dealing with ID for over a year now, ...
A. 30 January 2012: Unfortunately Viagra's patent doesn't run out until 2019. If you want more, you should switch to another brand that does have a generic or that insurance covers. Talk to your doctor about it.... (read in full...)
Circumcized or uncircumsized? Which do females prefer?
Q. Hi, I want to know if girls like penis uncircumcised or cirmcumcised? I'm french and in my country we are all uncut. It's about religion and culture, what is it in your country (well about muslim and jew I know) but for others country pls let ...
A. 30 January 2012: In America I think circumcision is pretty common, not only for religious reasons but also hygiene/aesthetics. There is no medical reason to circumcise and no evidence uncircumcised men have higher instances of infections or health problems. It's not ... (read in full...)
He's ok to do things when I"m on my period, I'm not!
Q. So me and my boyfriend were fooling around, having a good time, clothes on, and he went to put his hands in my pants, but I said no because I'm on my period, which I think is gross, and I thought he'd be grossed out when I told him, but he told me ...
A. 30 January 2012: It's a flexible silicone ring with a little baggie on it basically. You fold it a special way and slide it in so it sits just below your cervix. You can't feel them at all if it's in properly, though it takes a few tries to get it right at first. ... (read in full...)
He's ok to do things when I"m on my period, I'm not!
Q. So me and my boyfriend were fooling around, having a good time, clothes on, and he went to put his hands in my pants, but I said no because I'm on my period, which I think is gross, and I thought he'd be grossed out when I told him, but he told me ...
A. 30 January 2012: Have you thought about Instead softcups? You can wear them 12 hours and have sex with them. Very convenient and no mess whatsoever!... (read in full...)
He's ok to do things when I"m on my period, I'm not!
Q. So me and my boyfriend were fooling around, having a good time, clothes on, and he went to put his hands in my pants, but I said no because I'm on my period, which I think is gross, and I thought he'd be grossed out when I told him, but he told me ...
A. 30 January 2012: Why not just give it a shot? What have you got to lose? New experiences are the single best bonding experience for a couple. Though I wouldn't start with oral.... (read in full...)
Black specks in underware mean?
Q. Black specks in my husband briefs after washing; what does that mean if anything?...
A. 29 January 2012: Probably bits of darker colored clothing or lint.... (read in full...)
Guys I talk to think I'm flirting, but I don't even know how to flirt!
Q. One of my friends keep telling me not to talk to boys the way I do, and he says that I "don't know what I do to other guys." I've tried asking him what he meant, but he shrugged it off. I'm almost certain that he's talking about flirting, but I ...
A. 29 January 2012: A lot of guys will read flirting or being interested into absolutely any friendly gesture from a pretty girl, they could be doing that.... (read in full...)
I just get turned off by his double checking the condom
Q. Hi everyone, I didnt know who else to bring this up with so thought i'd see what other people on here think... Basically my partner and I are in a very loving relationship. We both want children and plan to start trying in ...
A. 29 January 2012: Unless he has an STD, his pre-cum isn't dangerous and is highly unlikely to get you pregnant. Pre-cum cannot contain sperm on its own, it can only contain sperm that was already in the urethra. As long as he hadn't ejaculated recently and had ... (read in full...)
Is it tacky to ask about STDs?
Q. I myself am currently a virgin and my girlfriend is not. She told me she has had some unprotected sex. She really really wants to have sex with me, we just started dating, however, we have known each other for quite some time and actually dated 4 ...
A. 29 January 2012: No you're not a jerk, you're being smart. There's nothing wrong with asking if she's been tested and/or asking her to be tested beforehand. It's not very difficult to be tested, no worse than a pap smear. HIV can be tested with a cheek swab now too. ... (read in full...)
He's ok to do things when I"m on my period, I'm not!
Q. So me and my boyfriend were fooling around, having a good time, clothes on, and he went to put his hands in my pants, but I said no because I'm on my period, which I think is gross, and I thought he'd be grossed out when I told him, but he told me ...
A. 29 January 2012: No more gross than other bodily fluids and no more "dangerous" than vaginal secretions or semen.
Period sex can be a lot of fun. There's bonus "lube," there's increased bloodflow down there so you get aroused faster. Just put down some towels a... (read in full...)
Bleeding while not on my period, am I pregnant?
Q. Recently my boyfriend was fingering me and I started bleeding but I'm not on my period. This has never happened to me before and I never bleed when I'm not on my period. Two days later I went to the bathroom and discovered blood on the toilet paper. ...
A. 29 January 2012: It's nearly impossible for pre-ejaculate to get you pregnant. The substance itself does NOT contain sperm, it is just a primer to protect sperm that may come out later. It can, in rare cases, pick up sperm from the urethra that was already there. As ... (read in full...)
My B/f says he's desensitized from all the sex and needs a three day break! Is that even possible? And he watched porn the very next night!
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been having sex pretty much every night for the past week to the point where he can't cum. He says he's desensitized from all the sex and needs a three day break, which we both agreed to under certain conditions: he not ...
A. 28 January 2012: If someone demands their partner stop masturbating with them and then has so little self-control they cannot go a full 3 days without porn, there's a problem. That's one of the very first criteria for an addiction, can you stop whenever you want. He ... (read in full...)
My B/f says he's desensitized from all the sex and needs a three day break! Is that even possible? And he watched porn the very next night!
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been having sex pretty much every night for the past week to the point where he can't cum. He says he's desensitized from all the sex and needs a three day break, which we both agreed to under certain conditions: he not ...
A. 28 January 2012: Any guy who requests a break from sex to look at porn almost definitely has at least the beginnings of a porn problem/compulsion. Does he often give up sex in order to use porn?... (read in full...)
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