A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So me and my boyfriend were fooling around, having a good time, clothes on, and he went to put his hands in my pants, but I said no because I'm on my period, which I think is gross, and I thought he'd be grossed out when I told him, but he told me that not only did he still want to stick his hands down my pants, but he wouldn't mind doing oral if I wanted.I think thats gross, and I'm kind of confused why he wouldn't think so.I mean, I'm not grossed out by my body, but I think its gross to do any sort of sexual activities that involves someones fingers or mouth getting blood on it. Do not understand....
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (31 January 2012):
 If it grosses you out then you don't do anything and he has to learn to respect it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the advice you guys, btw.
I just definitely think it's gross, and I'm probably not gonna change that, because it grosses me out, and I was really just confused by why he would want to do that, because its gross to me.
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A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (30 January 2012):
 Many, many women have no problem with having sex when their on their period.I am not one of them.. In my culture it's forbidden and very taboo.It's ok for you not to feel comfortable having sex at this time. Many women think like you. In some cultures women even sleep in separate rooms and are not allowed to cook or do housework during menstruation. Other cultures such as Jews, use this time for women to give extra attention to themselves and allow themselves to be sex free.Yes it is normal, yes many women and men enjoy it... but many don't. I just don't want to you feel that you should do something your not comfortable about.You have been giving good advice about how to try if your interested. But you shouldn't feel forced to have sex when you don't want it, not by your boyfriend or anybody else. You should have the right to say, "No, I'm on my period and I don't want to have penetrative sex".Think about the advice you've been given, it may be that you might like it if you try.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (30 January 2012):
 They offer free samples of them if you go email them on the website if you were wanting to try them out. I've never actually paid for them but have a small stack from all the samples.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 January 2012):
if you need it for a few days a month how expensive is that?
figure you aren't up to anything on day one anyway and by day 5 or 6 you should be light enough that it's not an issue
you're looking at day 2, day 3, day 4 and maybe day 5
maybe you will have sex every day? maybe not.... but if you need two a month that's $2.00 per month... BFD IMO
BUT what I sense from you is that blocking the flow is not what you are after... what you are after is a way to tell him NO...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThat is pretty expensive, if you do the math...
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (30 January 2012):
It's a flexible silicone ring with a little baggie on it basically. You fold it a special way and slide it in so it sits just below your cervix. You can't feel them at all if it's in properly, though it takes a few tries to get it right at first. You can wear it for about 12 hours at a time, less if your period is heavy, maybe longer if it's light. They say they are disposable, but honestly I've had one last three days just rinsing it off (though I don't want to advise you to do something that could give you an infection). The only downside is the price (about $1 per ring most places).
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh, I've actually never heard of that...What exactly is it?
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (30 January 2012):
Have you thought about Instead softcups? You can wear them 12 hours and have sex with them. Very convenient and no mess whatsoever!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt's just gross to think of my blood on him, be it his fingers, or his nether region. Yuck...Not sexy at all!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (30 January 2012):
Why not just give it a shot? What have you got to lose? New experiences are the single best bonding experience for a couple. Though I wouldn't start with oral.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah, I'm not sure how far he's gone with any of his exes, he really doesn't talk about them much, but from the things he's said, I dont think he's been very active before me.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (29 January 2012):
 I see nothing wrong in not wating oral or any other things sexually done while on your period. I mean you can give HIM oral, which I'm sure he won't mind? :)
If you don't want to do it, then no, means no. Nothing wrong in that.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm not nessicarily grossed out by the blood or anything, that's natural, but I just dont want him doing anything when I'm on my period because I'd like what is essentially the walls of my insides decomposing into blood, to stay inside, for the most part, until the time comes to do all that changing and stuff, obviusly, but I dont want it getting on him or me.... Plus its messy and well, when I'm a little crankier than normal, the blood is a little grosser than normal.
And to the anon answer about feminists, yeah, I can tell he really loves and respects me :)
to unknown2u, that's... Um, eew... but to each his own, of course....
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A
male
reader, Honest Answer +, writes (29 January 2012):
 Don't worry, he is perfectly normal (and so are you). As they say, "different strokes, for different folks." Some men don't mind and other do. But with that said, it's your body. If your not comfortable with sex during your period, let him know.Good Luck!Jeff
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2012): Most women probably find this disgusting because they are worried that their partners find it disgusting. I always avoided sexual contact during my period but a while ago I was having sex with my boyfriend when I got my period without noticing. He noticed but carried on and even went down on me, then told me afterwards that I had my period. I was mortified at first but he was the one who chose to carry on. He obviously didn't have a problem with it, it was all in my head as a result of people going on about how disgusting periods are. This was the same guy who made me realise that not all guys want their partners to be clean shaven, and that some guys actually like women to be natural.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2012): Many, many, many feminists would be upholding your boyfriend as a rare example of a man who truly respects and loves women for what they are beyond the illusion or construction that they socially perform.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2012): Yeah that's pretty yuck. But I guess atleast you know now that you dont have to be self-conscious of that sort of stuff around your bf.
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A
male
reader, unknown2u +, writes (29 January 2012):
There's an expression, 'getting your red wings', which refers to oral during her period. I'd be willing to do it, but my wife isn't inclined to have it happen. Bottom line -- some guys aren't that worried or put off by that time of the month. If you're not comfortable with it, fine, and tell him that you feel that way. But know that at least some guys aren't bothered by it.
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (29 January 2012):
 It's not gross, hon, it's just blood. Totally harmless. Plus, orgasm can relieve cramps.
Just wear a tampon during oral sex and you'll be fine. Since he should be focusing on your clitoris during oral sex, he shouldn't get any blood anywhere on himself at all!
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (29 January 2012):
No more gross than other bodily fluids and no more "dangerous" than vaginal secretions or semen.
Period sex can be a lot of fun. There's bonus "lube," there's increased bloodflow down there so you get aroused faster. Just put down some towels and be able to shower/bathe after.
I agree oral on your period is pretty nasty, but mostly because blood has an awful metallic taste not because it's more dangerous than anything else you might be ingesting. Nothing wrong with fingers, just so long as there's a towel to wipe it on.
Your period is just a normal thing. No need to be grossed out by it and if you're boyfriend is down for messing around on your period, it's worth a try.
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