My girlfriend just told me she wanted to be friends out of the blue. What should I do?
Q. Dear cupid.Am kind of confuse about my relationship right now my girlfriend wokeup one morningand told me she don't want a boyfriend any more that we can just be friend and noting attached to it. I ask her the reasons but she never gave any ...
A. 13 September 2011: I don't believe this is an "either/or" situation.... That is..... You can stay away from her... (not be too close and available to her).... AND you can look for and consider taking time with another girl who strikes your fancy, and who might have ... (read in full...)
He's a player, and I don't want to be hurt
Q. Hello, I've met a guy in June this year, we have the same interest in some activites and we have many things in common. Since we've met, we took 4 trips together, all of them wonderful. From the beginning he said he is not a serious guy and...
A. 12 September 2011: Cripes!!! He SAYS that he is a "player".... AND he behaves like one... WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED to see that you have a clearcut decision to make?????; you can either continue to be one of this guy's tarts (and sell your soul to him, while you're at ... (read in full...)
Husband has been acting really shady lately
Q. I need some advice... My husband has been acting real shady lately... He'll be on his phone in another room, and then jumps when I walk in the door. He carries his phone into the bathroom with him, won't go anywhere, even in the house, without his ...
A. 12 September 2011: You can ignore all those red flags, if you choose.... but I expect that there are enough that the stack of them will become unbalanced and fall over upon you sometime in the future. You won't be able to ignore them, then........ (read in full...)
Can you be married and fall in love with another person?
Q. Is it possible to fall in love with someone else when you are married?...
A. 12 September 2011: The statistics "tell" us that that happens in 50% of all marriages........ (read in full...)
I feel used and lied to
Q. So I recently asked for advice on a question of mine. It was regarding my ex telling me she was pregnant with my child and then not talking to me for a week. I can now extend this problem of mine by saying that it's now been almost 4 weeks. She come...
A. 12 September 2011: Let's go right to your question..... "Why are women so screwed up in the head?"
The answer, of course, is because they hang around with us men, and keep trying to understand us.... and there is NO WAY that that can ever happen.....
I assum... (read in full...)
I worry the age difference might be too much.
Q. So a couple months ago I met this guy at the gym and we see eachother there a lot and just say hi and eventually he added me on facebook. About 3 weeks ago, we had a conversation and exchanged numbers. Since then we've talked almost everynight on ...
A. 11 September 2011: 15 minutes is too much of an age difference if two people don't have the necessary "chemistry" to get and keep them together .... Incidentally, 1000 years ISN'T too much of an age difference for two people who have good chemistry and are going ... (read in full...)
My husband is hiding packages from his ex and other women's phone numbers....is it just me?
Q. My husbands high school ex girlfriend, that he reconnected with through facebook, sent him a package in the mail with old love letters and old pictures. He did tell me that she was gonna send them but he had to because ive got the only mail key to ...
A. 11 September 2011: Sounds like your hubby is playing you... and you don't seem to know how to put the kybosh on things that he is doing. I suggest that you build up a spine, tell him you know what he's up to.... and tell him that he has a choice: either cease and ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is going on a trip with 3 girls, one is his ex!
Q. My boyfriend has just told me he is going to London for the weekend with 3 other girls, and possibly another. He will be the omly boy. One of these girls is his ex girlfriend- who he is.close to and she is.newly single. The girl who's birthday it is ...
A. 11 September 2011: I suggest you dump him... and tell him that if - after a full year apart (That means, sometime in Spetember of 2012!) he thinks he wants to spend time with you.... THEN, AND ONLY THEN, will you speak with him.....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Why does my partner keep toying with my feelings? Why can't he just let me go?
Q. My partner and I have been together 2 years we have a one year old daughter (he told me he could not have children) things have not been right for a long time and I don't know what I have done wrong, he tells me I need to change, criticises the way ...
A. 11 September 2011: He keeps "playing with your feelings"... because YOU allow it. IF you and he are finished, then BE FINISHED and get on with your life....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has been secretly talking to his ex?
Q. I'm concerned about my boyfriend's crazy ex emailing him on facebook. I've been with boyfriend 2.5 years. Before we got together he used to date this ex pretty casually for a few months at a time, break up and get together when drunk. He then e...
A. 10 September 2011: In your submittal... I see enough evidence for you to sit him down and say, "Enough, already. Make up your mind... and if you choose to stay with me then discontinue communications with her." IF he can't/won't do that, then steel yourself to cut ... (read in full...)
Even though I've had my tubes tied, could I be pregnant???
Q. I'm 44 and had my tubes tied but hadnt had period in 2 months. i also had some slight bleeding after sex, when i wiped it was light in color and only when i wiped it last thru the day and was gone the next day but happend again after the next 2 ...
A. 10 September 2011: Ask your gynacologist....... (read in full...)
My married lover puts me in awkward situations where I have to meet his wife. Why would he do this?
Q. Hi, I am having an affair with a married man and have been for over 6 yrs, we are both in our late 50's,we both care for each other very much and get on really well and enjoy seeing each other. we can't break it off so please no moral judgments. i...
A. 10 September 2011: It's amazing... the extent that some of us guys will go to assuage our guilt.... AND not even seem to care how uncomfortable we may be making others..... How does his wife feel about you and him having a fling? Do you have to worry that - on ... (read in full...)
Should I have done things differently? Did I deal with this girl the wrong way?
Q. Ok, so I met my now ex-girlfriend this past December, and to tell you the truth, she was not that bad at first. However, in January she developed a stomach ulcer due to stress in college academics, which I don't get because they were easy ...
A. 10 September 2011: WOW.... this is a very extended submittal.... all pointing to one, solid conclusion; You and this girl are not compatible,.... and you will probably be much happier (and better off) if and when you two go your separate ways....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Did I do wrong? He had broken up with her. Then we had sex. He went back to her. Now she is angry with me.
Q. So basically. I was seeing this guy, and we ended up sleeping together.. the problem is, he was an ex of an acquaintance, she wasn't a close friend or anything, but I did know her and we would be nice if we ever bumped into each other.. . I felt ...
A. 10 September 2011: You may qualify as an "easy" person... but certainly not as "horrible"....
Let this incident go.... get on with your life.... and let this guy suffer with this once/ then ex-/now current, again, girlfriend of his........ (read in full...)
How can I convince my Boyfriend to help me get pregnant even though he does not need to help me bring the baby up?
Q. i need help... hi i am asking your help to convinceing my bf to get me pregnant but its not working. he does not want to have children or get marryed but i would like to some day soon for children and marry later on... he is 27 and i am 19 i k...
A. 10 September 2011: I think your B/F is quite smart to avoid pregnancy with you. I'd guess that he is looking at this picture far more maturely than you are.... AND, if you persist, don't be surprised if he simply walks away from you.....
Having a baby is a bit more... (read in full...)
Now we are back together her libido has dropped. Do we need relationshi[ counselling ?
Q. I first started going out with my wife about 9 years ago, and she had a very strong sex drive at that time. The relationship was great when it came to sex, but we argued a lot and we broke up for several years. We got back together about 2 years ...
A. 10 September 2011: Always be very careful when you issue ultimatums.... and consider what will happen if the recipient of the ultimatum chooses NOT to respond as you would hope...
IF you find a marriage/sex counselor who can help with this matter.... I hope you and ... (read in full...)
Are short men allowed to be good looking or do women find them unattractive because of their height?
Q. I stand 5'4 barefoot, I weigh 180lbs and I still have the washboard abs approaching the 30 plateau. The problem is my face. Friends and strangers alike tell me I'm very handsome. Enough to consider modeling but a huge dose of reality hit me when ...
A. 10 September 2011: Everybody's heart is about 1/2-way between their knees and their forehead...... and having one (a heart) is all that really matters....
When the right girl comes along... and you and she are "made for each other"... and hit it off... your height -... (read in full...)
Do people still believe in horoscopes and can horoscopes help relationships in any way?
Q. Hi, everyone I was just wondering if any of you guys believe in Horoscopes, the perfect match, and that you know. I find it kinda weird when people start saying that this is not good for her and that is better, ask about his zodiac signal. B...
A. 10 September 2011: I think horoscopes are amusing bits of lore.... dating back to pre-scientific days when the greatest worry for people was to have adequate food and water from day-to-day......
If you remember that... and don't put much weight in them... then the... (read in full...)
Do you think he is into me and I have a chance, or is it just wishful thinking?
Q. I'm going to put this as simply as I can, and even if no one replies, I think I'm going to feel relieved that it is out there - I love this guy! He goes to my school and the dilemma is we are both at totally different social statuses, he is über ...
A. 10 September 2011: Anonymous nailed it!!!! Read her reply again and again... and you will see the wisdom in it.....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Is it better to distance yourself or to keep on trying after being rejected by a friend?
Q. SO i have this friend. I asked her out/told her I liked her and she said that she was not rejecting me but literally had no time to make it work, so it would be unfair to the both of us. She said that maybe in the future something may happen but not ...
A. 10 September 2011: From the "tone" of your submittal... it sounds as if you think that whatever transpires between you and this woman is an "either/or" matter (either you and she are CLOSE FRIENDS; OR you and she must be MORTAL ENEMIES).... AND, from your descri... (read in full...)
How? Is it possible to get my cat back as first priority? And get my ex boyfriend back too?
Q. Here is a brief paragraph of my situation. My ex and I broke up this month after a year relationship. We had a huge fight during a trip right before (this is our first huge fight, we were basically ignoring each other during the trip). When we ...
A. 10 September 2011: IF he asks you to come around and pick up your cat, I suggest that you do so.... BUT, make sure you have a friend accompany you when you go to his place.....
Then, once you're home with your feline friend.... have a glass of your favorite wine....... (read in full...)
Is my husband using me to be his nanny and housekeeper?
Q. I have been married to my husband for 6 years. we have two toddlers, one of whom is in preschool, the other one is too young still. I work part time in the evenings. My husband works days. I run the house, balance the checkbook, etc (I am in ...
A. 8 September 2011: Sounds to me like the two of you ought to be having a discussion - based on this submittal - in front of a marriage counselor....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
My Boyfriends Favourite Perfume is his ex's
Q. Hi, I just wanted to run something by you girls and guys, see what you think. When I started going out with my guy we were talking about perfumes and stuff and he said that his favourite perfume was Flowerbomb.(this is a perfume ive always reall...
A. 8 September 2011: You're giving 'way too much time and mental energy to a "non-issue"........ (read in full...)
She likes, would date me....BUT she still wants to have sex with other people!!!
Q. Ok, this is a WEIRD one. But maybe you guys can help. See, I know this girl who is sort of promiscuous. Yet she's hott. And sweet. And so we been out a bit. Never slept together or anything because believe it or not, I dont think people should do...
A. 8 September 2011: Let's see if the "answer" isn't right there in your submittal... if we just edit it a bit. OK?
You wrote: "...Its like a trade off: I get to spend time with her and have her be like a girlfriend to me...BUT she can still sleep with other gu... (read in full...)
My ex has forgotten when my birthday is. Do I have a right to be peeved or am I making a big deal of nothing?
Q. My ex and me were together for just under six months. It's been several months now since we broke up. We've tried to be friends since then but it has been difficult for me because she ended it and then got a new boyfriend soon after. Anyway, t...
A. 8 September 2011: You're making a big deal out of NOTHING.... and should FORGET the whole matter. You MUST have something better to do with your time and mental energy........ (read in full...)
To tell? Or not to tell? I cheated twice on him
Q. Hi everyone! I've asked two questions before about my relationship with my bf of 4 1/2 years. Well I have another question for everyone. I cheated on my boyfriend twice wit 2 different guys. SHould I tell him? I mean I know if I tell him everything ...
A. 8 September 2011: YouWish was pretty blunt... but was right on target. YOU don't deserve this faithful guy... so feel free to break up with him now........ (read in full...)
I've had a crush on her since 1981. Now that I've told her she has stopped contacting me
Q. Hi, I have a friend on Facebook. I have known since 1981. I have had a crush on all this time. The 20 years that I didn't talk to her, she was still on my mind. She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, or ever will. So I wrote to her ...
A. 8 September 2011: This whole incident sounds terribly one-sided. YOU wrote to her... and SHE hasn't uttered so much as a peep to you? I suggest you forget about her and get on with your life....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Is he trying to let me down gently or does he really want "friendship"?
Q. A guy contacted me on line. We corresponded for about 3 weeks and the conversation was good. I asked if we could meet up and things kept getting in the way; first it was my family commitments, then it was extreme weather, then it was his work. H...
A. 8 September 2011: WE guys always hold out hope that we can get a woman to put out if we can just keep her talking - hence, interested......
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Guys: Why would you give a woman your number if you have no intention of answering her calls?
Q. Men why give women your phone number if you know that you are not going to answer for her? thats crazy...
A. 7 September 2011: We (guys) do that ALL THE TIME. Get used to it.... it's S.O.P. (standard operating procedure) for guys....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
How do I stop being so dependent on him?
Q. We pretty much had been in a relationship for about a month before we both went off to college two weeks ago. There is a two hour travel distance between the two colleges, so technically we're long distance. My biggest worry with him is hell dump ...
A. 7 September 2011: You're young.... relax and have a good time where YOU are (at your college)..... and let him "do his thing" where he is..... and stay in-touch, if you wish.... but let things me 'way more casual....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
After 30 years together husband says he never felt intimate with me
Q. I have been with my husband since I was 16 been with him for 30 years and married for 23. He said that he has never felt intimate with me, is this possible? He first asked for a divorce and now a separation because he feels intimate with wo...
A. 6 September 2011: ali: Don't fall for that B/S... He's using the "I never felt intimate...." crap to misdirect HIS infidelity on to YOU.... AND it "sounds" like you're on the borderline of accepting his displaced guilt....
YOU, are OK... HE is unfaithf... (read in full...)
My girlfriend was raped before I met her and she can't get over it. Is it fair to leave her?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for 10 years. She was raped at some point before I met her. I found this out in the last year. Initially, we had a good sex life, but within two years it became nonexistent. She just cannot be intimate with...
A. 6 September 2011: Is your G/f under professional counselling to address her issue with the rape????? If not, then there is no future to consider.... She MUST face the past if she (and you) have any hope for a future........ (read in full...)
I',m upset that I caught my husband with a dirty magagzine
Q. Dear cupid i am married to my husband who i love so much and the other day i called into his work and caught him coming out of the bathroom at work with a dirty mag and i was upset and he was not bothered that i was upset but it made me feel ...
A. 6 September 2011: The magazine is only of little importance in your whole submittal.... and you should be prepared to drop your objection to it... IF you can open up, with him, the issue of why you are not getting adequate sex...... Work on that, first....... (read in full...)
Second chance? promises? what are the chances the relationship will last this time?
Q. If a couple who have been together only a yr. or so have a lot of issues throughout their relationship end up breaking up and then 2 mths. later decide to reunite without really working through these issues, can this relationship survive the second ...
A. 6 September 2011: Your answers, in order:
1. Probably not.
2. About 6 to 8 weeks....
3. The "honeymoon" phase will last until the morning after you put out for him the first (new) time. After that, it reverts back to where and how things were when you and... (read in full...)
During sex I "zone out" and think of anyone but him. Yet I love him. Did my past issues affect my ability to enjoy sex with him now?
Q. I think I have some intimacy issues. I love my boyfriend very much, I am extremely attracted to him and we have sex on a regular basis (1-2 times a day). The only thing is, when we have sex I am never able to think about him or what is happenin...
A. 6 September 2011: AS long as you don't yell out one of your ex's names... or the name of your favorite movie/music star... you're home free....
Once, I had a G/F who had trouble remembering my name, so I taped a piece of cardboard on the ceiling over my bed that... (read in full...)
Have I screwed everything up by sleeping with him early?
Q. I met a guy at a friend's gathering a few weeks ago. We really hit it off, and he drove me home at the end of the evening. Came in for a few hours - we have some drinks and laughs, swapped numbers, but nothing happened. I text him the following ...
A. 6 September 2011: DON'T fall in to that trap of blaming YOURSELF for HIS "problem".......
Your time-line was swift... but it is evident that this guy borders on "committment phobic".... and feels that your's and his getting so close, so soon signals that a "relatio... (read in full...)
He waited 23 years to express his disappointment. How many people out there did not have sex on their first wedding night?
Q. How many people did not have sex on their wedding night and waited until the honeymoon?? Husband was upset that we did not have sex on wedding night. We did have sex as soon as we arrived at the hotel on the honeymoon. when i tried to explain...
A. 6 September 2011: Riiiiiiiiggghhhhhtttt. THAT's a pretty good reason to ask for a divorce....
Ask your hubby if the girl HE IS NOW SEEING AND HAVING SEX WITH... puts out for him at his beck and call every time... AND, if he's going to use this same, flimsy e... (read in full...)
Why is my mom so upset about the way my husband and I treat each other?
Q. Hello, I am a 31 year old married woman. You have given me great advice in the past. Here is my problem: This is a little long with background. My father and my husband get along great. My dad usually calls him, son, when he talks to him; ...
A. 6 September 2011: Your Mom and Sis sound like jealous shrews.... and the best way to deal with them is to NOT deal with them.. .(i.e. IGNORE THEM!!!!).... Sounds like you've got a great husband and marriage.... don't let either person put a damper on either... (read in full...)
It ended, but I still miss him!
Q. Hello everyone, I just broke up with my boyfriend. The reason for this was the he was changing and he the nerve to tell me in the midst of us arguing that he got a girls number and they hung out. He is a tow truck driver and he said he met her ...
A. 6 September 2011: Relax.... and revisit this whole situation on or about January 5th, 2012...... (read in full...)
Boyfriends can't bring me to orgasm, I have to do it myself
Q. Hi.. i am 17 soon to be 18 years old and i have had, which i ould consider, 2 serious boyfriends. both in which complain about how i never orgasm during sex. it seems to be that i am the only person who can bring myself to orgasm, however this is ...
A. 6 September 2011: Don't lose any sleep over it. You're in the same predicament as many people - men and women. If and when you have a great experience during which you DO have orgasm.... then enjoy it, and seek out the same circumstances in the future.... If it ... (read in full...)
I like this guy, but he smells really badly. Do I tell him and ruin my potential for a relationship?
Q. Hey there. So my question is a little weird. For starters, I'm 17 and I'm dating one of my classmates (we're just seeing each other, we're not official or anything yet). We go on dates and hang out a lot and it's all really fun and I really like and ...
A. 3 September 2011: Here's a chance for you to be a REAL friend.... Take this guy aside.... someplace, just the two of you, privately,... and tell him about what you wrote here. You could even print a copy of this submittal and hand it to him..... Tell him you li... (read in full...)
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