| Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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Why is my boyfriend suggesting all these sex improvement operations for me?
Q. Been with boyfriend for 10 years, have always been there for him in every way. I take care of myself financially, stay fit, work out four days a week, dress sexy, do what I can to keep things exciting. The other night he brought up me having a ...
A. 21 April 2011: No its not normal. If you love someone, you love them unconditionally. As you grow old, your body will age too...and if he doesn't understand that, then he's very immature. Its disrespectful, in the very least. Now he wants your labia reduced and ... (read in full...)
Her parents forced her into a marriage with a man she doesn't love, why cant she just leave him for me?
Q. I was in love with a most beautiful girl who also loves me very much. but suddenly she was married with other whom she never knows (her parent's compelled her to marry). Now we love each other much more than in the past. then why can't she just ...
A. 20 April 2011: Pardon me if I'm wrong, but this girl couldnt stand up to her parents and fight for you, when she had the chance, what makes you think she's going to break her marriage, go against both families (her parents' and her husbands') and come to you now? ... (read in full...)
Have any guys stayed with a girl that they dated in their teens?
Q. Is there any guys out there who met a girl at 15/16/17/18 and are still with them? maybe married to them, engaged, still dating and how old are you guys know? I keep hearing so much stuff about how when guys meet a girl at 18 or younger they nev...
A. 20 April 2011: I met my BF when I was in school. He's invested much, MUCH more in our relationship than I have, and its because of him that we'r still together. I'm 28 now. I don't know how we've made it work, but we have, against all odds. I cant think of a ... (read in full...)
I can't get over his exes!
Q. My boyfriend is older than me and has had lots of sexual partners. Everytime he mentions them I get really jealous and upset, and I cant stop picturing him with all these different girls. How can I stop doing this? Its starting to affect our ...
A. 20 April 2011: There's no easy way to do this. You just have to accept it, accept that he had a past with numerous partners, but then again it was his PAST. You cant change his past, neither can he. But you have to realize that it was in the past, and ultimately ... (read in full...)
Were his words sincere? OR was it a ploy to pantyville?
Q. I've fallen for a man (who lived in shared accomodation) for no longer than 6 months. (He has left now) However he had a gf but he consistently flirted with me, in the process I fell for him but now that hes moved out, Ive completed ridden him of a...
A. 19 April 2011: Its perfectly justified to feel hurt and angry, because the whole thing is still fresh in your mind. Right now you would feel used, abused, cheated, angry, hurt...but once you give yourself some time to calm down and you realize actually how ... (read in full...)
Were his words sincere? OR was it a ploy to pantyville?
Q. I've fallen for a man (who lived in shared accomodation) for no longer than 6 months. (He has left now) However he had a gf but he consistently flirted with me, in the process I fell for him but now that hes moved out, Ive completed ridden him of a...
A. 18 April 2011: I cannot emphasize enough...never, ever, EVER get involved with this man. Never trust a man when he says, "If I were ready to get married and let go of my 'bad ways', you would be the perfect wife for me". That screams PLAYER. Its like an oath that ... (read in full...)
I don't want to go out to have drinks/dinner alone on my birthday and end up looking like a total loser to everyone else!
Q. Hello all.. I'll be turning 22 in a few days and I'm not sure what to do. I've been in a pretty low place in my life lately. I don't socialize at all, I barely talk to anyone except for my bf who lives 3hrs away. I was hoping to be able to spend...
A. 18 April 2011: Its your birthday, and you have the right to spend it in whatever way that makes YOU happy. Honestly, nobody really cares and thinks you're a loser that you're eating out alone. I do it very often when I'm at university because I think its so much ... (read in full...)
I hate the way I look and hate every pretty girl I see
Q. I'm an ugly 22 year old female; sure, I'm smart, kind, talented, all those good "inside" things, but I'm ugly outside and there's no questioning, I've got comments my whole life and I can see it in the mirror anyway... and not much can be done, and ...
A. 17 April 2011: Maybe you cant help the way you look, but you can change the way you project yourself and think about yourself. If your BF is with you despite having pretty ex GFs', you cant possibly be as gross as you think you are. The problem is that you have ... (read in full...)
My ex cheated on me and now she's with a guy who used to be a good friend of mine. I'm a mess right now! Help!!
Q. I was cheated on by my ex and now she's with a guy who used to be a good friend of mine. I know it's a cliche. Anyway, I found out she was doing all this behind my back after about 5 months last year in Dec, which means she started this in Sept. No...
A. 17 April 2011: This is such a difficult situation to be in. But I still say, its best you found all this out now, than maybe a few years down the line, when the damage would have been much,much more.
Its very easy to say that you have to get over it, but you ... (read in full...)
Found number for escort from bf, should I trust him?
Q. Hello, I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half. I know his last relationship before me was like three or four years ago. Anyway I found out last year he had a list of phone numbers of escorts in the area. I freak out but didn't c...
A. 17 April 2011: You can choose to ignore it and take the "ignorance is bliss" path.
Or, you can confront him and ask him about what all this is. If its a thing of the past, then its your decision. If you can accept it and get over it, great. In any case, it... (read in full...)
My sister just walked in on me wanking & I think I'm going to die of embarrassment!!!
Q. Well no easy way to ask this so i'm just gonna blurt it out. My sister just walked in on me wanking and i think i'm going to die from embrassment. This is so much worse than i could imagine. What do i do? Do i say anything to her? Or do i treat it ...
A. 16 April 2011: She's just teasing you. What is she going to tell people anyway? Anyone she says this to,will tell her, "so what?? Who hasn't done it"??!! Relax! It seems like a huge thing now, but it isint really. Henceforth, make sure your door is locked becaus... (read in full...)
I am cheating on my wife, my lover has a boyfriend who cheats on her, and my lover is cheating on her boyfriend with me! What should I do about this mess?
Q. i am 34year old married man and she is 22 yrs god knows how but 3 years ago i very deeply fell in love with this girl and she was the one who proposed me that time even after knowing that i was married. i agreed and we were deeply involved, used to ...
A. 15 April 2011: PLEASE get out of this quagmire. That is the only solution. You, your lover and her partner are all caught up in a vicious circle, each cheating on the other...and there is no solution to this except breaking this chain once and for all. What... (read in full...)
My BF’s friend has an open relationship and is trying to influence my BF to do the same. It’s a mess. Please help.
Q. I have two friends who are married. My long-term (over 4 years) boyfriend and I met them about 2 years ago and we quickly became good friends with them. We would vacation with them, hang out in our spare time at our house or theirs, and so on. ...
A. 15 April 2011: Tell your BF clearly that you've had enough of K, and although his personal life is of no interest to you, that fact that he is slowly pervading into your personal life, is. You say your boyfriend has gone from "no way would I want to do that" to "I ... (read in full...)
32 Year Old male virgin, no luck with girls, thinking of going to an escort. My religious side says no and my masculine side says hell yes!! Anyone in a similar situation?
Q. I'm 32 and am a complete and utter disaster when it comes to relationships. I am good looking, I'm not obese or anything, I can approach girls and talk to them, but I seem to always say the wrong thing and turn them off. I have followed the advice ...
A. 14 April 2011: So what's going to happen if you DO go to an escort? You would no longer be a virgin. Thats it, right? Is that enough for you? How are you going to feel once the "act" is done?
I don't understand why there is so much shame attached to being a ... (read in full...)
Is it too late to ask her out with only 2 days until she leaves?
Q. Alright, so there is this girl who lives in the room next to me in residence at university and about 2 weeks ago she mentioned that she and her boyfriend had broken up but she seemed to be over it from what I gathered. Anyway, since then I have ...
A. 14 April 2011: Go for it!!Its never too late. You have nothing to lose and at least you would be stuck with the regret..."what if I had asked her out...."
Life is too short for what-ifs' and if-only's. Go ask her out.... (read in full...)
Bumped into an old crush and wondering if he found me attractive...
Q. I bumped into this guy today, who I used to have a big crush on in my last year at school (so I was 14-15 years old at the time I liked him then, and he was a year older). He (apparently) didn't fancy me then. Well, that was what he said, but he ...
A. 13 April 2011: If he turned back to look at you, I'm sure he found you attractive. If I were in his place, I would never turn around and look at someone unless there was something there.
I say you should leave him a message. Go for it!! At least you wont hav... (read in full...)
I tried cutting my friend's hair and it was a complete disaster!! What do I say or do to make this better?
Q. i was at my friends house with my other friend.. lily. we got bored so lily said why dont we cut her fringe.. so we did. and it looked really good axualy...but then she said 'can you even it off,' so i did, and now it looks BLOODY AWFUL! we kept ...
A. 13 April 2011: I know you're probably completely freaking outright now, but its really not that bad a problem. So you cut her hair....but she allowed you to do it!! What you can do is, suggest that she might go to a beauty salon and get a professional repair job ... (read in full...)
Bumped into an old crush and wondering if he found me attractive...
Q. I bumped into this guy today, who I used to have a big crush on in my last year at school (so I was 14-15 years old at the time I liked him then, and he was a year older). He (apparently) didn't fancy me then. Well, that was what he said, but he ...
A. 13 April 2011: I think you should go ahead and send him a message. Like a casual "hi...whats up? It was nice seeing you today"...kind of a thing. Come on, there's nothing to lose here!! See what he says, ask him out for a cup of coffee, maybe.... (read in full...)
Sleeping with a girl who is "involved". I want more. Please help.
Q. I met a great girl a few months ago and have recently started sleeping with her. The problem is she is in a long distance relationship with a guy in another country. We spend a lot of time together but I get the feeling I'm more into her than s...
A. 11 April 2011: Stay away from her. It cannot really stay "just sex". Its going to be very painful for you to get involved and have your heart broken eventually. Its going to be a lose-lose situation for you from the word go. She isint even really into you now, ... (read in full...)
Six months ago he walked out with no explanation. Should I trust him again?
Q. Sorry it may seem a bit long. But here it goes: Me and this guy have been best friends for a few years now, but we were also FWB's for a little over two years. About six months ago he stopped speaking to me out of the blue. No texts, no calls, a...
A. 11 April 2011: Why do you want to go down the same road again OP? He hurt you, he left you groping in the dark for answers, he carried on with his life and now he's waltzed back into yours and expects everything to be the same.
This guy is COMPLETELY taking y... (read in full...)
My BF doesn't believe in sex until marriage but I don't think I'm ever going to be ready for marriage. Should I stay or leave??
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years and he's 19, I'm 18 and he doesn't believe in sex until marriage but I don't think I'm ever going to be ready for marriage and I don't want him to compromise his morals for me so, what I'm asking is if ...
A. 9 April 2011: That depends entirely on you OP. If you have an otherwise loving,committed relationship and you are ready to abstain from sex for the sake of this guy, then you can decide to stay on. Hopefully you might change your mind about marriage somewhere ... (read in full...)
Why does my ex still have bills and accounts together if she's broken up with her ex?
Q. Ok agony aunts, so the girl I've been dating for 5 months now, I just found out that she has her ex's phone still under her contract, and that they still have money in a bank account together, yet according to her they've been broken up for over a ...
A. 9 April 2011: Well yes..it is odd that she should continue having a joint account with someone she's broken up with. I think you should just be upfront with her and ask her why she's doing this. Its not necessarily cheating because she might not really have ... (read in full...)
Should I confront him about this?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 4 months and we really like each other. I often go round to his house and we just sit and watch a movie or something like that (we don't do anything sexual) and I usually leave quite late. Sometimes I ...
A. 9 April 2011: I think you should talk to him about it. Dont sweep issues that bother you under the carpet. Its normal that your BF is sexually attracted to you, but if you guys haven't spoken about it, then its high time you should. You sleep over at this guy's ... (read in full...)
Should I be patient and wait for him to fall in love with me, or should I run now to avoid a broken heart?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm looking to hear what people think about something I am worried about with my boyfriend of 6 months. We get on really well, especially when it's just the two of us together (he can try too hard to impress his friends sometime...
A. 9 April 2011: Sounds like this man doesnt really know what he wants. You could try spending more time with him in the hope that things eventually change, but then, you either feel the sparks or you dont. I mean, there's no middle ground here. If he doesnt feel ... (read in full...)
I asked him to wear a condom and he was "offended" that I didnt trust him! Now he doesn't want the relationship anymore!!
Q. I first met this guy in summer school...i didn't have any classes with him...but from the very beginning he started showing signs of interest...afterwards I think it was in September when he added me on face book...he kept on commenting on my posts ...
A. 9 April 2011: Sorry but it seems this guy just wanted to get into your pants. It was just the sex that he wanted and when he didn't get it, he was "offended". This is a classic move. Offence is the best defense.
If anything, thank your stars you're out of t... (read in full...)
He seen me in my bikini, got a boner and now he's angry at me!
Q. Ok so the other week I went on holiday to the seaside and another family who are really close. So on the last day I wanted to go swimming but the only other person who wanted to was a boy my age from the other family. So after I got changed into my ...
A. 8 April 2011: Oh he's not angry at you. He's just very, VERY embarrassed, and the way he's projecting that embarrassment onto you, is by getting angry at himself.
Dont make it any worse for him. He's a young guy, he got an erection looking at a pretty girl in ... (read in full...)
Been cheating on wife with 3 girlfriends and 40 hookers
Q. Hi, I have been married 10 years to my wife who I love but she is very difficult to live with. I don't know if I am a nympho or what, but when she is not around I can masturbate up to 4 times a day. Also, when i have been away for work on many occ...
A. 6 April 2011: Look Mr."no moralistic bull please", you've asked questions whose answers you don't even want to hear, you just want reassurances that its normal and no sane person out here is going to cater to you.
You are free to do whatever you want, but you ... (read in full...)
Is it true that you're a slut if you have big labias?
Q. Im officially freeking out. Im in a LDR and ive been with my bf in real but we obv spend more time online together. Well i dont remember what happened but my bf turned round to me and was like im gonna make up somethin about u then and tell so...
A. 6 April 2011: Not only is your B/f completely ignorant about the human body, he's what they call "a rare combination of upto something and good for nothing".
It amazes me that its just so, SO simple to demean a girl!!
Dump this loser. He thinks he's "all th... (read in full...)
Is the attraction towards this younger man because of the fact that I am lonely and he is the only guy that is giving me attention in many, many years?
Q. I met a guy online about a year ago and we have seen each other 3X in the past year. He lives about a 2hour flight away from me but we have only managed to see each other a few times. I wouldn't say we are dating but we text almost everyday ...
A. 6 April 2011: Your feelings for this guy are completely normal and justified. You haven't had any male attention for many years, so you like it when this man is there for you.
You don't want to let him go because he's your only "friend", someone whom you can ... (read in full...)
Is there any such thing as "I don't know why I love you but I love you"..??
Q. My boyfriend of 9 months told me yesterday that he doesn't know why he loves me but he loves me. Is there any such statement and does such exist. I can tell him 3 reasons why I love him but he can't? When I asked him what he menat. He said "It mean...
A. 6 April 2011: Actually I can completely relate to that. I am working on a PhD, Iv attended some great conferences the world over, I like to think I'm good at what I do. So a few months back, I was having a silly argument with my B/f. I was complaining to him ... (read in full...)
My G/f is unbelievably controlling/manipulative/insecure and I'm wondering if I can do anything to make her a little more secure...
Q. I know that my girlfriend of almost 1 and a half years is controlling/manipulative/insecure/etc...and that 99.9% of me knows that I'll inevitably break up with her, but I am the kind of person that wants to have no regrets and exhaust all measures ...
A. 6 April 2011: Oh wow...are you dating my aunt from 20 years ago? Because this sounds EXACTLY like her!!
The bad news first. Its very, very difficult for your G/f to change. Baseless insecurities just get worse with time and more and more ridiculous. She wont... (read in full...)
Boyfriend and I have completely opposing views on porn. Is this a possible deal breaker?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm 24 and I've been with my boyfriend, who's 25, for about four months and all had been going great; he's kind, caring, generous and always puts me first. However, I noticed on his internet browser history a couple of week...
A. 5 April 2011: Cerberus...very well said!!
Most of pornography is a free choice and the people in it are by their own choice. People leave behind successful careers to join the porn industry, some with the support of their families. Don't trust me? Watch th... (read in full...)
Girlfriend cheated on me and I can't get over it
Q. My girlfriend cheated on me months back and I can't seem to get over it. We were living together and things had started getting really rocky. We were fighting bitterly all day every day. I felt her distance herself from me, and rather than give...
A. 5 April 2011: Cheating is a deal breaker in most relationships. If you can rebuild your relationship after all the mess, then its a different thing. But obviously you cant, and if I were in your place, I couldn't have done it too.
If she does things that mak... (read in full...)
I want her... but NOT her kids!
Q. hi, im 21 years old and i am having an affair. the woman is 32, married with two kids. over the last 6 months we have been having wild sex in hotel rooms and at my place and going out for meals miles out of town. she keeps telling me that she will ...
A. 4 April 2011: She's lying and cheating and having a good time out of it. Dont worry you wont be stuck with the kids in any case, because the mommy's not coming either. Had she wanted to, she would have walked out of the marriage before starting the affair with ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said to his friend he is not attracted to me and I have a fat ass!
Q. Found conversations between my bf and a friend of his. He was telling her how he really likes me and that i am one of the nicest people out. But he hates my ass. He thinks it is fat and is not attracted to it. He is horny as fuck but doesnt even ...
A. 4 April 2011: You know, you don't have to be really skinny or a size zero. Its important to be healthy and control what you eat. Some people have a big built and they can never really be stick thin and honestly, that kind of underweight anorexic look sucks!! You ... (read in full...)
Why do all women shave down there?
Q. Why do all women, or almost all women shave down below? I read somewhere here on DC that even girls as young as 14 are doing this!...
A. 4 April 2011: I shave myself down there because its a matter of personal hygiene for me. As Chigirl said, its cleaner during the periods and also generally I feel better about myself when I'm tidy down there. Also, most of the time I dont bother keeping it ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said to his friend he is not attracted to me and I have a fat ass!
Q. Found conversations between my bf and a friend of his. He was telling her how he really likes me and that i am one of the nicest people out. But he hates my ass. He thinks it is fat and is not attracted to it. He is horny as fuck but doesnt even ...
A. 4 April 2011: OK look...that conversation wasn't meant to be read by you in the first place. Let me clarify: I'm not supporting him at all, I'm just saying that all of us have personal conversations with our friends and we tell them about our feelings, our fears, ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend gets turned on when I'm angry or upset!!
Q. My boyfriend gets turned on when Im angry or upset. Its most definitely not the only time he gets turned on (fortunately, because that would be one hell of a double edged sword!) but it surprises me, and makes me laugh a little nonethel...
A. 4 April 2011: Oh!!! How lucky can you get?!! Actually you never really know what turns someone on....and if this does it for your BF, its great!! I wish my bf was like that! Im pretty short tempered and when I get mad at him, its pretty much ballistics all the ... (read in full...)
Am I making a mistake in getting married?
Q. Ok so this is going to be a long question and I really need your help. You can be as blunt as you want because I just want to know the truth so thanks in advance. I'd like to know if I am making a big mistake in getting married to my fiance. We met ...
A. 4 April 2011: There are danger signs blazing allover the place. DO NOT marry this guy. You don't need to darken an already charred past.
Show me one reason why this man is good for a lifetime of commitment. There will be none. Just kick him to the curb, ha... (read in full...)
I do love my boyfriend. Is it cheating when I stop to talk to other boys?
Q. i am 19 years old and i have been with my boyfriend for just over a year now. i know i love him sooo much but whenever i meet a new guy, or talk to any other guys, i feel like cheating. i never have cheated before and i dont think i ever will but ...
A. 2 April 2011: If you're not crossing any boundaries, its not cheating. Having a boyfriend doesnt mean shutting yourself away from the world.
... (read in full...)
Tried to get my GF to "change" for me, but I'm still not attracted to her and there's no sexual tension
Q. I've been with my GF for 3 years now, but our relationship is missing sexual tension. I'll try to be as honest as possible. You will judge my behavior as selfish, and I will not object, but know that when I'm changing my GF to my tastes, I'm trying ...
A. 1 April 2011: The cardinal mistake in your attitude is that you're trying to get someone to change to suite YOUR taste. You think in turn thats going to save your relationship? This poor girl is so low on self esteem that she "wanted" you even though she knew you ... (read in full...)
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