A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 9 months told me yesterday that he doesn't know why he loves me but he loves me. Is there any such statement and does such exist. I can tell him 3 reasons why I love him but he can't?When I asked him what he menat. He said "It means I dont like you for your beauty, car, education or whatever" but he just loves me. This statement was made after a week when we had a heated aargument which led him to shut me off for three days which was the first time ever he had ever be that pissed off at me. He said if he knew the reason why he loved me then he would have gotten rid of me. For example if it was because of my booty or eyes, he can easily do away with me for those reasons but he found out he couldn't let me go and the reason is because he does not know why he loves me.I m trying to make sense out of this but it is still not clear to me. I guess because I want him to treat and show me and tell me things like I am his queen nd he adores me because .....ANyhoo what is your take on this issue. Do people love people and dont seem to know why and does this mean this is the definition of true love when you cant figure out why you cant do without loving someone but have no concrete reasons?
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI will have to say every post here is nothing but the truth. I appreciate my boyfriend more. I have two masters, he has a bachelors. I have a house, he lives in an apartment. He doesnt have to try too hard to win me over or prove how worthy of a man he is to me cos' what we have is just natural, pure love with no condition. Nothing I have makes him want me more, its my heart he is attracted to and I know it because he is never afraid to tell me when Im wrong or going offline. The first guy tat didnt want me for my looks or what I have to offer. Thank God for this kind of love.
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female
reader, dreamingbella  +, writes (8 April 2011):
 I agree that your BF either can't put any words in the explanation for his love to you or he truly doesn't have a reason. I never feel like i need a reason from my man for his love toward me. All i want is seeing him show it everyday. Coz simply he loves you, cares about you, being with you then there must be something about you make him sticks around for lifetime. My fiance tells me he loves me everyday and shows me how much he does. I was sometimes wondering why he fell for me. He fell for me on the first day we met and he had no reason for that. Later he said "because of your personality, your charm". But when we fought coz i was silly and messed it up, he said that i was selfish and hypocritical. Yes i was! But after the fight he held me and said "i love you, i love your good side and even your bad side". That moment i know, when he truly loves you, it doesn't matter if you're good or bad coz he just loves the whole of you.Then my advice is don't make silly question. Enjoy every moments with your man. Forget the true love concept in the film. Real life's more beautiful!
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reader, shawncaff +, writes (6 April 2011):
 This is a fascinating question.I have to say I disagree with the other posters. I think your bf has to have a reason for loving you---but it might very well be that he is not able to put it into words.He did say the beginning of it, which is that he does not love you for your physical attributes or your possessions. That's beautiful in and of itself. But I think if he dug deeper or was more articulate, he could go further.I do like Anonymous_123's boyfriend's answer. But I also think he too could have gone further.When I think about the times I have felt close to a friend or a girl I was dating, I would say it was because I felt like I shared something with them. To me, that feeling always fills me with the most joy. It is deeper than giving, and certainly more satisfying than taking. It is saying that for this moment, I am no longer alone, no longer tied up within myself, cut off from the world. Someone else and I are sharing something which binds us together in that moment. And if you can string together many moments of sharing with another person--then maybe that's love.So I think maybe that is what your boyfriend means: he, for whatever reason, does not feel as alone in the world as when he is with you. If he were a poet maybe he could go into more detail. But there is definitely a reason--he just may not be able to express it.By the way, he sounds like he cares for you very much...so don't let his inability to articulate his love bother you!
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): these answers helped me too....ive been wondering the same thing as one day i remember i had asked my bf why do you love me and his response was idk i just love you.
I didnt get it but i think i maybe do now =)
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWow very positive answers here. Thanks guys. I was thinking the same thing but my mind also wants to think the worse. But there you have it. Unconditional love has no conditions and you just love someone because you do. Thanks to all for giving me a restful day to look forward to.
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reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 Actually I can completely relate to that. I am working on a PhD, Iv attended some great conferences the world over, I like to think I'm good at what I do. So a few months back, I was having a silly argument with my B/f. I was complaining to him about the fact that he never proud of me for my achievements(it was very silly of me to have said that) and he never tells me how appreciates whatever Iv done for myself and he doesn't loves me because of all that I am.
He told me something I can never forget. He said that he had known me since high school and was in love with that very girl. What I am now is no measure of what I mean to him. He doesnt love me BECAUSE of anything or FOR anything. He loves me because he does. Its that simple. Maybe thats what unconditional love is all about OP....there are no conditions to it...no because, no thats why....its just simple, old fashioned love.
You're very lucky if your B/f loves you like that!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): Yeah. Just means he loves you beyond any measurable reason. He loves you beyond anything tangible or anything he can explain. Don't worry it is a good thing. Like when I met my boyfriend I couldn't explain why but I saw him and instantly fell in love. I can't tell you why. When you don't have to put that much thought into why you love a person, you just do, then yes that is pretty much the closest I've ever been to true love. In fact, who knows, it probably is true love, whatever that means.
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reader, ideserve37 +, writes (6 April 2011):
 Yes it is. Women are very emotion and we can express ourselves in ways men can not. It's not the words that matter its the action. If he can't tell you but everyday of the week and every second of an hour shows it then it doesn't have to be told. Would u rather a man tell u he Loves you and never show it......be patient let him find the words to say even if it takes years! Hope this helped:)
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