A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I have been married 10 years to my wife who I love but she is very difficult to live with. I don't know if I am a nympho or what, but when she is not around I can masturbate up to 4 times a day. Also, when i have been away for work on many occasions, I have met three different girls I would class as girlfriends, they all know of my situation, ad I am only currently sleeping with one of them. But I have also had sex with about 40 prostitutes during this time, all over the world. I love having sex with hooker, and I love having sex with different women (all the time) and I do not think I can change this. I have never told my wife, and never will, I have had all the tests and am clean.Please what do you think... can I continue like this and is it normal, my answer to both those is yes by the way. Also no moralistic bull please.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2011): Go see a therapist and while you're at it try to remember why you married your wife in the first place. What made you realize you love and need her. Get tested and see a Shrink as soon as you can. The fact that you feel that there is nothing wrong with your actions is a huge issue because that's not normal. It's also possible that your wife knows. Do it for yourself and her.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 You need to come clean and leave your wife and get yourself some help. This isn't normal (or healthy), and you're putting your wife's health at risk by having sex with so many other women. This is totally unfair to your wife and it's unfair to blame it on her by claiming it's because she's difficult. I'm in agreement with CindyCares, this sounds like some kind of addiction.
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A
male
reader, macdubh712 +, writes (6 April 2011):
I don't think it is right what you are doing to your wife. However, is it normal for men to want to have sex with many different women? Yes. You should probably divorce your wife and just be a man-whore. Then no one can grudge you for you lifestyle. However, if you decide that your wife is more important then cease and desist all extra marrital activities.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): Dude.... You seem quite content with what your doing, but the simple fact that you posted this with a request for answers on your behavior not only indicates that you feel it is wrong, but that you have intentions on stopping it, or at least hearing why you should. Yes, it is normal what your doing. I'm 26, just got engaged and my parents cheated on each other throughout most of their marriage. I learned alot from their infidelities, and lying and cheating isn't good in any situations (YOU KNOW THIS). I have a crazy sex drive.. one that my fiance can't fulfill, and I'be lying if I told you I didn't ever consider looking elsewhere for sexual pleasure, but at the end of the day, I DO love her, and when I think about how badly it would hurt her to hear of me cheating on her, I know I can't do it. You have known about your sexual tendencies for a long time... did you plan on cheating on your wife when you got married? My suggestion to you is to stop what your doing, if you can't... than leave her because most likely she doesn't deserve how your treating her. If you truly love her, stop and from this day forward devote your life to her and your marriage, and make up for the lost relationship. Good Luck Brother.
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A
male
reader, yesno +, writes (6 April 2011):
This is a suck situation but I think increasingly common. In some ways it's just too easy to get laid. As I man, I can relate to the frustration of being monogamous while looking in at the grand orgy taking place everywhere. My advice? Leave her. Let yourself indulge in the free love of the 21st century. This will be tough on her probably, but ultimately she'll also have a chance to find what she is looking for. I'm guessing you are not it. They are out there, I'm sure, but most men, if given a free choice, wouldn't opt for monogamy. In general, men need to stop getting married!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): Most wives have inklings so perhaps this is why your wife is difficult.Dont you care about aids and V D? You sound quite nasty to be honest and if you dont love your wife anymore then get a divorce and leave her in peace-the fact your not having an affair with one person says it all: you like playing the field.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 April 2011):
 my only issues are 1. you LIE to your wife. LYING is reprehensible. MORE so than cheating in my book... you are a liar and not trustworthy2. are you tested regularly for STDs? if not you put your wife who you claim to love at risk.3. is this normal? NO4. is it doable? Yes if you can live with your lying cheating self it's doable.wny not come clean with your darling wife whom you love and tell her that she does not satisfy your sexual drives enough and you would like to be in an open marriage. Then she can take lovers while you travel and everyone is happy.
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A
female
reader, Sunnyxx  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 If you know you can't stick to one woman, why you got MARRIED of all things is a total mystery to me. As is why you're not pursuing a divorce if your wife is so "difficult to live with" and doesn't satisfy you. What are you getting out of this marriage? If you're looking for justification for your actions, you've really come to the wrong place.Everyone here is going to tell you to respect your wife and either leave her or tell her the truth... because honestly, no. It's not normal.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWow, what a lot of haters...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): i think your just looking for someone to turn round and say yeah its normal to have feelings and be attracted to others and yes guys cheat.truth of the matter is guys can change...they can stop cheating and stick to their wives/girlfriends i just think you dont want to and are hoping someone will agree with you.i dont.either stop cheating or tell your wife and im pretty sure she'd dump your ass cuz i know i would.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 Look Mr."no moralistic bull please", you've asked questions whose answers you don't even want to hear, you just want reassurances that its normal and no sane person out here is going to cater to you.
You are free to do whatever you want, but you are cheating on your wife and she has no idea whatsoever about your doings. Its not normal, and you know it. Otherwise you wouldn't have asked the question. You can continue like this till you get busted. You can do whatever you want, because clearly you think you can get away with it all. You have an addiction and you need help.
The decent thing would be to tell your wife about all this and let her decide whatever she wants.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (6 April 2011):
 If you already know the answers why do you bother asking ?
Also, you think you cannot change- and most of all it sounds like you don't want to change ,even if you could, since you love what you are doing and have no "moralistic " scruples about it.
So I don't know what are you really asking when you say " can I continue like this ?. Do you want to know if sooner or later you are gonna get busted by your wife ? Statistically speaking yes, the more you go on, the higher is your risk.
As for " is it normal " , if you ask me, I have to say no, it's not normal, both in the sense that people who spend as much time and money on hookers as you are not the majority, and in the sense that yours sounds more like an addiction , than like a high sex drive.
But, since you have already made up your mind....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNot really
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 I am confused as to the type of answer you are expecting to get. To ask "no moralistic bull please." shows that you already know what most people would say. I wonder if you consider yourself an immoral person. To steal you wife's life away like this is absolutely criminal. If you think she is difficult to live with, why stay with her at all? It sounds as though you are more concerned about yourself, you think you can carry on like this for the rest of your life? No it isn't normal and no, I highly doubt you can carry on like this for the rest of your life, sooner or later, greater forces will catch up to you, whether it is disease or carelessness leading up to your wife discovering all of this, or simply just the whims of God, everyone gets caught.
Leave your wife, then you will be free to go about your sordid little life for as long as you wish. You find a distaste in this paragraph of mine? I'll not praise you in any way, I'll not ever support this sort of convoluted behavior for reasons to numerous to list out here.
I hope that helps.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): You need to divorce your wife so you can live your lifestyle because you are simply not a committed/relationship type person. If you continue, you will continue to hurt your wife emotionally, possibly feel guilt, and run the risk of bringing her disease.
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