| Latest articles: Just Two
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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My friend owes me money and will not pay up!
Q. This isn't exactly a Relationship problem but I have a 'friend' who I gave a loan of €250 last year, she is now engaged to her boyfriend of two months and quit her job to spend more time with him. I have panic attacks due to lack of money and I ha...
A. 25 March 2012: There was a similar question that I had answered and the OP actually ended up getting the money...finally!
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-loaned-my-friends-some-money-for-a46.html
I think you shouldn't just let go, because your money is yo... (read in full...)
One of the girls my boyfriend used to sleep with is OBSESSED with him and it's causing problems in our relationship! Help!
Q. my boyfriend and i have been together for a year weve only started fighting the last couple of months, and its always over the same thing...or the same person i should say. basically when i first started talking to him before we were da...
A. 25 March 2012: Is the problem really the girl? Or is it your boyfriend? Because its one thing to be concerned about an obsessive ex., its another thing to constantly have to keep a tab on her. Is your B/f even half as concerned? And who are these "numerous" people ... (read in full...)
She wont talk dirty to me!
Q. Av been with my gf 7 months and i really want to talk dirty with her but she wont.how can i change her mind ????...
A. 24 March 2012: You cant change her mind OP, if someone doesn't like it, they don't. Its not something you can force someone to do, and neither should you. ... (read in full...)
Is he abusing me?
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years has been verbally and emotionally abusive. I have been devastated but he says it's not abuse. Again today he shut off the cable, the Internet and the phones. All meanwhile he is calling me a slut, dumb bitch, stupid and my 10 ...
A. 24 March 2012: Yes this is abuse and you need to get away from this ASAP. Not only is it wrong for you, its worse for your child, who is a witness to this at an impressionable age. ... (read in full...)
My ex has been telling people that I use her for sex!
Q. Hello. I am feeling very guilty at the moment. I'm going to try and keep this short. I broke up with my ex about 6 months ago, this was due to her being abusive towards me, she would hit me and emotionally treat me bad. I loved her very much and...
A. 23 March 2012: You are both using each other, the difference is that you are the better person of the two. You love her and you are acting out of passion, BUT in NO WAY does that give you the license to have sex with her, because you are officially broken up. You ... (read in full...)
Guys: would you date a girl if you knew she had done nude modelling?
Q. I have been modeling for an online lingerie site. I was approached by a porn site for nude modeling... The money they offered was amazing! I told them I would NEVER do photos with a man or another woman... Guys: Would you date a girl if you knew...
A. 23 March 2012: That would be a deal breaker for most guys looking for a long term relationship. Also, its very dangerous territory that you're treading into. It always starts like this and before you know, the money offered will get even more "amazing" and you ... (read in full...)
Fallen in love with someone who is 9000 miles away....
Q. it all started when I saw her blog link on a website, and you can call it a love at first click. 'you just fall for her look, you will get over it soon.'; 'tumblr is not a social network for you to find a date!' etc... I'm tired of hearing these...
A. 22 March 2012: You will kick yourself for not trying, so go for it! In any case you have nothing to lose and miracles do happen!... (read in full...)
I am jealous that other men got her while she was partying, carefree and slim, and I only get the "in debt and less attractive" version of her
Q. Hi all, hoping you can help me out here. I've been dating a girl who I really love for almost 4 years now. I know she loves me too. Something causes me to be really upset and question my whole relationship. I should give a bit of background, she ...
A. 22 March 2012: If it makes you want to give up, then give up and stop complaining. You're just miserable because she had fun while you were busy studying and now you grudge her of that! Which means, by your logic, you see yourself as a loser compared to her and ... (read in full...)
My wife agreed to introduce this third woman into our sex life to spice things up, but now I have feelings for her. My insecure wife is fine with other women but not this one, why doesn't she want me to be happy?
Q. My wife and I have been married 14 years. Pregnant at 17 but in love at the time. Because of the diffucultys of being young parents we went through a lot of struggles. I feel this had a registering effect on some of our marriage because of the ...
A. 22 March 2012: "Happy trouples" never work out, if they did, the entire dynamics of all relationships would change! Its nice to know you are so concerned only about your own happiness but have you EVER taken one single second out to think where this is all going? ... (read in full...)
My best guy friend was having constant fights with his girlfriend because of me, so I told him we cant be friends anymore. Did I do the right thing?
Q. I just broke all ties with my guy best friend because I was getting hurt with whatever that was happening and I couldn't take the pain. We've been best friends for two and a half years and he was literally my everything since i was going through ...
A. 22 March 2012: If he is now involved with some other girl, then you did the decent thing by backing out. ... (read in full...)
How can women watch porn with their partners?
Q. One thing that bugs me is how can women watch porn with their boyfriends/husbands? Aren't you bothered he's getting turned on by another woman, who he possibly thinks is hotter? The thought is horrible....
A. 21 March 2012: I have personally never enjoyed porn, with my Bf or otherwise, but I am very aware of what it constitutes. If my Bf were to suggest that we watch porn together (he doesn't watch porn anymore), would I be offended? No. Because I am very secure in my ... (read in full...)
Did I ever mean that much to my ex? And how long should I wait before I get rid of the stuff he left in my house?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend of three and a half years last month. We lived together at first but he moved out 8 months ago because he was sent to work in another city, it was go or lose his job so it was understandable, and since then the ...
A. 21 March 2012: You broke up last month and its already the 21st of March. You've tried contacting him, you've done your bit, if he doesn't respond, its not your fault in any way. Throw out his stuff, you are not responsible for his things anymore. If he doesn't ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him why I acted so badly?
Q. There is this guy who I met early this year, we get along very well, had brilliant banter and quite a bit in common. He was the one guy who always texted back quickly and in fact everyday! Just seeing how things were and before I went to bed to say ...
A. 21 March 2012: Well if a guy told me that he had abruptly cut off all contact with me for another girl and now he was just coming back to me because the other girl had screwed him over, I would never entertain him. Nobody wants to be second best or the leftovers. ... (read in full...)
I don't like her inappropriate behaviour!
Q. I have a group of friends who I was at a party with last weekend. They know and study with this girl. She is very slutty I would say. She grabs at the guys (she's got 3-4 guys she's always grabbing at). Now, what they do is their business, but this ...
A. 20 March 2012: My room mate at University was very much like the girl you described. She used to sleep naked, she was very sexual, she would dress provocatively, make out with every guy she could lay her hands on, and as you said, " sitting on their laps "riding" ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him the truth? and if so, how????
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about 6 months now but we were close friends for 2 years before that. I have been raped twice. The first time I was pregnant as a result and it was ectopic. The first time was when I was 16 and I'd had too mu...
A. 20 March 2012: If you dont tell him then you will be carrying this pain with you, for no fault of your own. That monster who raped you is now living life blissfully unaware of you, but you are having to bare the consequence of his actions. It is not your fault OP, ... (read in full...)
My wife wants the woman I cheated with to tell her about things before she can let it go!
Q. hi there i had an affair 11 years ago and my wife found out 14 months ago .The affair lasted 2 a half years and my wife was devastated i have tried every thing possible to win her back.we have been on holidays i buy her flowers all the time and ...
A. 20 March 2012: There's nothing more than I can add to what Aunty Bim Bim has said, there is the pain of a lady who has been cheated upon talking to you. You cannot do anything to wipe out the pain and the hurt that you have given her. Do you realize how ... (read in full...)
I feel like a horrible person because I left my ex for someone else
Q. In October 2011, I ended things with my ex. Hes a college freshman and im a junior in high school. We were together for 2 years and 3 months. I ended it because of a guy I had started to have feelings for during October. In December, about 1 month ...
A. 19 March 2012: You need a break to sort out your feelings because you are just jumping from one guy to another, and its all happening so fast that you yourself are not sure of what you want.
You are playing with the feelings of these guys involved. First yo... (read in full...)
Why does this girl tell me that she masturbates?
Q. Please don't laugh I'm 23 I have a friend. And this girl. She will text me randomly or tell me randomly that she masterbated. Like I'm confused. Why would a girl tell a guy she masterbated? Is that good for me? Or bad that she tells me t...
A. 19 March 2012: She's interested in you and probably this is her way of getting you to think about her sexually. There is no other reason why a girl would tell a guy that she masturbated because its in bad taste and crass to talk about this with someone who is just ... (read in full...)
I need advice on places to travel in Europe!
Q. This summer I'm planning to take a trip by myself, more so for the experience and greater benefit of independance, I would like to see what it is like when you're out in the world by yourself, experiencing new places. I'm hopping to go for two maybe ...
A. 19 March 2012: I'm talking from personal experience here, Norway is a great place to visit but on the expensive side.
Most of Italy is perfect, I've spent the best time of my life in Tuscany in a place called Cortona. Paris is great too, but I'm partial to Rome,... (read in full...)
I'm constantly in a nervous state when its time for a family dinner.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year an a half. Obviously you get past that phase where you're so wrapped up in love you think eveything is wonderful and now I'm seeing some problems. We have big family dinners every 2nd month in my fa...
A. 17 March 2012: What an ass! He doesnt respect your family and thinks he's the cat's whiskers.
Honestly you dont deserve this constant dread of having to walk on egg shells at every family gathering. He sounds like a nuisance, and if he's telling you that its... (read in full...)
B/f loves me but he's close to his best female friend and it makes me very uncomfortable
Q. My fiance is in love with his best friend. They have known eachother since they were very young and have always been close. They used to 'play dirty', like most kids do I guess, when they were about 7. They grew up together and he tried to start a ...
A. 17 March 2012: OP you cannot even THINK of marrying this guy with the other girl still in the picture. Yes you are second best, he loves her and it is a slap on your face to be sitting next to him and be a spectator and an audience of his lost-love sage, while he ... (read in full...)
I loaned my friends some money for a film project and I've not heard from them since! What should I do?
Q. I've been financially double crossed by friends and I need advice on what to do now. Some background: in september I was apart in a project for a film festival where you make a short film in 2 days and enter it before the deadline ends. The team w...
A. 16 March 2012: Yeah!!! I am so happy for you OP! It feels like a personal victory! :)
I am really happy you went for it and just goes to show that you should give as good as you get when the situation demands it. Whether or nor she keeps in touch with you is n... (read in full...)
Ladies, is a 4.25" penis big or small?
Q. Ladies, do you consider a 4.25 inch erect penis to be big or small? Do you have experience with this size? If so how did you like it? ...
A. 15 March 2012: Hasnt this topic been put to rest?!
For the last time, women do not CARE about penis sizes, as long as you know how to use it and can pleasure them. The outer 1/3rd of the vagina has 90% of the nerve endings and therefore is much more sensitiv... (read in full...)
I think my best friend went through my phone and sent out naked photos of my boyfriend to others! Should I confront her?
Q. Im 26 and am currently in a LDR with a lovely guy. He works away for 2 months at a time so we keep the relationship going by sending sexy photos to each other. Anyway, i saved the photos onto my phone and thought no more about it but then i just ...
A. 15 March 2012: You should confront her but be prepared for denials, because its very likely that she will feign ignorance. Moreover if she's done this, then she's not a very nice person and she will never understand your concern, au contraire she will ridicule you ... (read in full...)
I loaned my friends some money for a film project and I've not heard from them since! What should I do?
Q. I've been financially double crossed by friends and I need advice on what to do now. Some background: in september I was apart in a project for a film festival where you make a short film in 2 days and enter it before the deadline ends. The team w...
A. 15 March 2012: You did the right thing. I know its not something you wanted to do, but you have to take the bull by the horns, if the damn bull doesn't pay up! Just don't budge till the money is paid. Your friends are really insolent and this is the only way to ... (read in full...)
Can 13 year-olds find a lasting relationship, or is this just puppy love?
Q. Ok... know a lot of you will disagree with my view on this but oh well...I'm 13, and I have a boyfriend of 8 months, we really get along and we have almost everything in common, he told me he loved me and I told him I loved him too but then i felt ...
A. 14 March 2012: Nothing is impossible and miracles do happen. If both of you really love each other and want to be with each other, nothing can stop you and I mean nothing. Dont ever listen to people who say it cant survive, who's to say that it cant happen?
... (read in full...)
My boss is married. He rubs and pats me at work. What are your thoughts? He's older but attractive to me.
Q. I've been working at a local restaurant in my town for almost two months now. It's the first real job I've ever had. I've been recently getting vibes from my boss. Last week, we had a moment. The area behind the counter is very narrow. My co-wo...
A. 14 March 2012: Dream away all you want but dont ever let it translate into reality. Here's why.
He's married and 20 years older. You cant ever expect him to leave his wife for you and if that day were to ever come, then be prepared to be dumped for another ... (read in full...)
Is it naive to think your relationship with your spouse is special or unique?
Q. I was working on my wife's computer recently, and I found some old emails from about 3 and 4 years ago between my wife and a couple of her exes. I couldn't resist the temptation to read them. I don't know that I really feel jealous (at leas...
A. 13 March 2012: It was wrong of you to read her personal emails, its a violation of privacy and its completely out of line. You had no business to go snooping into her personal stuff.
That being said, did you have a past before you met your wife? If you had ex g... (read in full...)
I want to leave my girlfriend because she is not a virgin, advice?
Q. Me and my girlfriend have been dating for a year now and we both love eachother. When I met her she was in a relationship and we started off as friends and she ended up leaving her ex boyfriend for me, She's never done anything bad, she's faithful, ...
A. 12 March 2012: Break up with her. Do her the BIGGEST favour than you can ever do and just leave her alone. I pity the poor girl, I really feel bad for her, that she has to go through all this shit just because she was unfortunate to come across the world's biggest ... (read in full...)
B/f is emotionally abusive to me when drunk then later apologizes. Is it time to go?
Q. I have been with my bf for 8 years. We have a mortgage together. For many years he has been abusive to me while he is drunk. He calls me names and picks on me about personal things that I have confided in him over time. I recently had a spell of ...
A. 11 March 2012: You know what you should do. You need to summon up the strength to let go because this is an unhealthy, abusive relationship. You say its not so easy to leave, that's because you fear about what's going to happen without him, because you have become ... (read in full...)
At 21, all of the good looking women are taken and all that's left are "leftovers"
Q. Ive gotten to a point where no women is good enough for me to date. At 21 all of the good looking women are taken and all that's left are "leftovers". I feel I owe it to myself to find the best the world has to offer and I haven't seen it in ...
A. 10 March 2012: I see you are getting a lot of negative feedback, but I'll just say that you need to change the way you look at things. What is "used" really? Isn't that a very derogatory way to refer to girls who've had relationships? Just because a girl has had a ... (read in full...)
Little sex, I'm working nights, found wife's sex toy. Is she cheating?
Q. My wife and I have been together for 4 years but in the last 3 have only had sex maybe 6 times. Just resently I found a sex toy after she went away for a weekend for work. I know she has been using the lotion she got for us also when I was working ...
A. 8 March 2012: If she was cheating on you then she wouldn't be using the toy, unless of course you think that masturbation is cheating! ... (read in full...)
What is stronger, love or hate?
Q. Hi, I am wondering about a philosophical question, but one that has great impact on me personally. I am wondering, what is stronger, love or hate? I wonder about this because I have felt hate for a woman that has been very strong. She used m...
A. 8 March 2012: You are not a hateful person, you just strongly dislike the woman for what she did to you and you are unable to let go off that feeling.
To answer your question, I like to believe that love is stronger than hate, because love gives us a will to ... (read in full...)
Do I just have to be okay with no sex in my marriage, or should I find someone to give me that "experience" my body is craving?
Q. Hello, I really need someone to help me out. I have been married to my husband for almost five years, and we have two children together. Ever since we had our second child, my husband and I have had very little to no sex. He could care less about ...
A. 8 March 2012: "I really don't want to cheat". That's funny actually, because that's entirely what your post declares. If you wanted to explore what sex with another man was like, you should have done it before marriage and children. Wanting to satisfy your ... (read in full...)
My mum's boyfriend tried to kiss me and feel me up!
Q. My mum's bf who she been with for years tried to kiss me and feel me up. He said it was q mistake and never meant it and said to forget about it. I dont know what to if I tell her it will break her heart and I dont want her to hate me but I dont ...
A. 8 March 2012: Stop being silly, your mum would never hate you. Be prepared for this creep to deny everything but be firm and stand your ground. Do not let this matter die down, it is not safe for you to be in the house with this man around. Your mum needs to know ... (read in full...)
We have a son together, but she hides me from everyone! She wouldn't even let me sign the birth certificate!
Q. Hi people, I'm not from on English speaking country so I hope this is still readable. For the last 8 years I have been in a relationship with a woman who hides me from her friends and family. I do see her brother or sister sometimes but I wonder i...
A. 8 March 2012: OP you are a good guy, and I believe that there is a circle of life, today you are in a bad place but tomorrow things will change, they have to. That's the law of nature. If you feel that your girlfriend will be happier without you, then let go off ... (read in full...)
We have a son together, but she hides me from everyone! She wouldn't even let me sign the birth certificate!
Q. Hi people, I'm not from on English speaking country so I hope this is still readable. For the last 8 years I have been in a relationship with a woman who hides me from her friends and family. I do see her brother or sister sometimes but I wonder i...
A. 7 March 2012: You have been with this woman for 8 years, how on earth did you manage to continue?! You are just a dirty secret, tucked away at the back of the closet. This woman has major issues, she is depressed, this is not normal behavior. It seems to me that ... (read in full...)
I slept with a married man thinking he was single and now he won't explain himself!
Q. I slept with a married man he acted single but now I fell for him a he is ignoring me he doesn't email, text or anything not even to apologize to me. How do I get closure? I feel so low and guilty about this plus I like him all @ the same time. I ...
A. 7 March 2012: What did you expect OP? If he's disgusting enough to cheat enough on his own wife and sleep with you, then do you think he owes you anything? You know now how he was, no apology from him will make any difference because it wont mean anything. He ... (read in full...)
His ex girlfriend is his roomie!
Q. Well, my bf and I have only dated for a week. I have a really good feeling about him and I. But I have a problem. Let me start with some background information about him: He and I met last year, we've been pretty good friends since. We secretly...
A. 6 March 2012: If you dont want to leave your B/f then you will just have to go with the flow. There is really no other option. But keep in mind that this is not normal nor a healthy relationship. You can always talk to him about it, but what are you even going to ... (read in full...)
His ex girlfriend is his roomie!
Q. Well, my bf and I have only dated for a week. I have a really good feeling about him and I. But I have a problem. Let me start with some background information about him: He and I met last year, we've been pretty good friends since. We secretly...
A. 5 March 2012: Definitely not normal by any stretch of imagination. If they were just sex buddies earlier, they've surely taken it up a notch by being husband and "wife" now! The communication skills have improved, the emotional bond, the shopping, living ... (read in full...)
His ex girlfriend is his roomie!
Q. Well, my bf and I have only dated for a week. I have a really good feeling about him and I. But I have a problem. Let me start with some background information about him: He and I met last year, we've been pretty good friends since. We secretly...
A. 5 March 2012: Definitely not normal by any stretch of imagination. If they were just sex buddies earlier, they've surely taken it up a notch by being husband and "wife" now! The communication skills have improved, the emotional bond, the shopping, living ... (read in full...)
I loaned my friends some money for a film project and I've not heard from them since! What should I do?
Q. I've been financially double crossed by friends and I need advice on what to do now. Some background: in september I was apart in a project for a film festival where you make a short film in 2 days and enter it before the deadline ends. The team w...
A. 17 February 2012: Good for you OP!! I'm so glad you didn't give in! Never, ever let such people get the better of you and always give as good as you get.
Now keep pursuing her, remind her that you have already given her the receipts and she should not act funny an... (read in full...)
I loaned my friends some money for a film project and I've not heard from them since! What should I do?
Q. I've been financially double crossed by friends and I need advice on what to do now. Some background: in september I was apart in a project for a film festival where you make a short film in 2 days and enter it before the deadline ends. The team w...
A. 7 February 2012: You shouldnt just let this go. These cheapskates do not have an iota of decency left in them, and when you do get your money back, make sure that's the last you see of them.
Your silence has been taken as your weakness and they feel that since yo... (read in full...)
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added them and they have added *nonymous 123!
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