| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
|
What should I do with my girlfriend who is into muscles
Q. This would sound a bit silly, but i've become to realize my gal is a MUSCLE fan. She even mentions it in a very inconsiderate way, like if we'd be talking, and i mentioned a guy's name, she's say "yeh the guy with the muscles" literately. No ...
A. 4 December 2011: Yeah, you're missing the point OP. The point is not that she isn't attracted to you, the point is that she isn't attracted to herself. She thinks she's too big. It's got nothing to do with attraction towards you, it's got to do with her not feeling ... (read in full...)
My period was missed, should I worry?
Q. This question may well sound abit dumb, but i am young and have no idea about female anatomany, not to mention i worry far to much so if you could tell me if this is normal or not it would be great. I have bas...
A. 4 December 2011: Periods might fluctuate. They follow the cycle of the moon really, not the date of the calendar. They are also influenced by the women you surround yourself with, believe it or not. When women are very close, or live together, they will start to get ... (read in full...)
We're both virgins, should I expect him to be somewhat skilled?
Q. Okay, this might be a little odd and maybe shallow, but I was wondering: guys, how were you the first time you had sex? And girls, were you pleasantly surprised or not? I ask because my boyfriend and I are planning to have sex for the first time and...
A. 3 December 2011: Expect nothing and hope for the best. If you expect anything you will get disappointed, and if you expect nothing you will get pleasantly surprised. You chose what you want to be.
I've been with 3 virgin men. The first two were horrible in bed. ... (read in full...)
Do you prefer sex with the lights on, off or dimmed?
Q. Just out of curiosity, I'm interested to find out, and would like to know: Sex with the lights on, off or dimmed? What do you prefer? What do you typically do? And why? Thanks! ...
A. 3 December 2011: Lights on. I like to take in the view. If lights are off it's because it was in my eyes. Dimmed lights make for romance. Complete darkness is created through blindfolds, which heightens your other senses and can be quite intensifying.
Maybe... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to want her to wear a different dress? The one she chose for New Year's Eve looks like Lingerie.
Q. Hey everyone, I have a somewhat delicate issue here. First of all my girlfriend and two mutual friends of ours (a boy and a girl) decided that we are going to celebrate new years eve together in a club in town, so far so good. Today she was s...
A. 3 December 2011: Seriously, you need to let her wear what she wants to. She's not wearing to attract other men, she's wearing it to impress the ladies. Women dress to impress other women, about 99 percent of the time, because most guys don't even know what a halter ... (read in full...)
Is it just that time has changed my attitude? Or could it be the promotion is affecting things?
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years moved to another town a year ago for a job. We were living together and everything was great. The plan was that I follow him there once I get a job. It's been a year now and initially I missed him like crazy and I thought...
A. 3 December 2011: Well this isn't that difficult to figure out when you look at it from the outside. Your feelings towards your boyfriend haven't changed. Distance hasn't made you grow apart, and your attitude towards him hasn't changed. The only thing that has ... (read in full...)
Am I right?
Q. I feel like just because I don't act like a slut, I'll never get a guy to notice me in my school. I really like this one guy ,but everyonce in awhile I see him with some random girl hanging all over him. Now its a common sight in my school to see ...
A. 3 December 2011: You probably will not get noticed by guys at your school. Maybe, but probably not. Because you're not a slut. But don't think that's a bad thing, guys laugh at the sluts behind their backs and you definitely do not want to end up as the joke.
... (read in full...)
What should I do with my girlfriend who is into muscles
Q. This would sound a bit silly, but i've become to realize my gal is a MUSCLE fan. She even mentions it in a very inconsiderate way, like if we'd be talking, and i mentioned a guy's name, she's say "yeh the guy with the muscles" literately. No ...
A. 3 December 2011: She's overweight so would feel more comfortable with a guy who matches her in size. Women want to be the "petite" and "fragile" one, she probably currently think she looks like she could beat you in battle of any sort, which makes her feel too ... (read in full...)
Should I cool it off? He says he likes spending time with me but is not sure if he sees a future with me.
Q. ive been seeing this guy for about 3/ 4 months now and I wanted to know what we were, just to make things clear for us both, and his reply was that he doesnt really know. He likes spending time with me but not sure if he sees a future with me. i a...
A. 3 December 2011: Sounds a bit like he basically wants sex from you if he started saying your inexperience is a disadvantage to him... Doesn't it? Obviously you and him do not want the same things, or you must take a risk at voicing what you want or lose him. Tell ... (read in full...)
Unhygienic session of anal sex.. Will I get sick?
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been together for a year now and finally had anal sex. I've had anal sex before but they've always taken place in the shower (with my ex of five years) so it had always been clean and super enjoyable. Well, it kind of ...
A. 3 December 2011: That too, you shouldn't apologize for anything. He was the one who wanted to stick his penis up your ass, a bit of smell and poop is what is to be expected and if he doesn't understand that then he's got no business sticking it up there in the first ... (read in full...)
What should I do with my girlfriend who is into muscles
Q. This would sound a bit silly, but i've become to realize my gal is a MUSCLE fan. She even mentions it in a very inconsiderate way, like if we'd be talking, and i mentioned a guy's name, she's say "yeh the guy with the muscles" literately. No ...
A. 3 December 2011: Ah, well the matter changes of course if she's been expressing she wants you to change. That's rude. And in that case you are right to worry how long this relationship will last if she is eager for you to change. Just make sure you haven't ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to urinate in the bath and shower?
Q. How many people urinate in their bath or shower? My boyfriend says everyone does and expects me to trust him if we bathe together. What shall I do?...
A. 3 December 2011: Pee smells. And it leaves stains after a while. Have you ever scrubbed a toilet? Have you ever smelt a toilet? That's why I don't pee in the shower... it's bad enough to that the toilet smells like pee, don't need the shower to reek as well. I don't ... (read in full...)
What should I do with my girlfriend who is into muscles
Q. This would sound a bit silly, but i've become to realize my gal is a MUSCLE fan. She even mentions it in a very inconsiderate way, like if we'd be talking, and i mentioned a guy's name, she's say "yeh the guy with the muscles" literately. No ...
A. 3 December 2011: Oh yeah and your girlfriends comment wasn't either inconsiderate nor a sign that she prefers bigger muscles than you have. It was just a comment and you are being way too sensitive about it, suspecting the worst. The girl just commented, and if the ... (read in full...)
What should I do with my girlfriend who is into muscles
Q. This would sound a bit silly, but i've become to realize my gal is a MUSCLE fan. She even mentions it in a very inconsiderate way, like if we'd be talking, and i mentioned a guy's name, she's say "yeh the guy with the muscles" literately. No ...
A. 2 December 2011: So Very Confused, and OP, people can like one thing to look at, but want to be with someone else. Looking at something only comes down to looks. When you are with a person who they are matters most, and affects how they look. When you are with ... (read in full...)
Unhygienic session of anal sex.. Will I get sick?
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been together for a year now and finally had anal sex. I've had anal sex before but they've always taken place in the shower (with my ex of five years) so it had always been clean and super enjoyable. Well, it kind of ...
A. 2 December 2011: Yes, wear a condom during anal, for both his and your safety. He can get an infection if poop enters his urine tract, just like you can get an infection if you go from anal to vaginal sex (bacteria gets to your urine tract and gives you a UTI, and ... (read in full...)
Unhygienic session of anal sex.. Will I get sick?
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been together for a year now and finally had anal sex. I've had anal sex before but they've always taken place in the shower (with my ex of five years) so it had always been clean and super enjoyable. Well, it kind of ...
A. 2 December 2011: God I feel so sorry for you. Really, that was a horrible experience, but you and your boyfriend were obviously getting it on like a house on fire, or else you'd never have gone to do this...! So that's the good part, you and him have amazing hot sex ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend was my best friends "booty call". How do I get over this?
Q. My girlfriend of about 5 months now slept with my best friend two years ago - multiple times. I know this shouldn't bother me, but the fact that I know her past, and how she was (sleeping around/being a 'booty call'), has me skeptical. I have been ...
A. 2 December 2011: I'm not exactly sure what you mean by "put herself out like that"? But anyway, knowing someones past isn't always easy. Anything about someones past can iin one sense or the other be questionable, which is why when we don't want to judge people ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be the controlling type, but I'm so sick of being ditched for his mates!
Q. This is going to be a very long story, so thank you to everyone that carries on reading. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 3 years and I was 13 when we first got together and he was 15 but the year above me, we were both in sixth...
A. 2 December 2011: I really don't know what to tell you. It sounds like he does want to spend time with you, and he was more or less bullied into not spending time with you. I could go to say that he shouldn't be friends with those people because REAL friends will ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend was my best friends "booty call". How do I get over this?
Q. My girlfriend of about 5 months now slept with my best friend two years ago - multiple times. I know this shouldn't bother me, but the fact that I know her past, and how she was (sleeping around/being a 'booty call'), has me skeptical. I have been ...
A. 2 December 2011: I think it would bother me too. There is a reason for why yours friend's ex is off limits most of the time, because getting with a friends ex is usually a bad idea. Too much complications. The danger of ending up comparing the relationship with what ... (read in full...)
Is there such a thing as a "leg-fetish"?
Q. I understand the whole foot-fetish thing, but is there a specific fetish toward 'legs'? A female friend and I were discussing what we were in to and I told her I'm a sucker for a killer set of legs, which she said is a foot-fetish. However, I'm not ...
A. 2 December 2011: You don't have neither foot fetish or leg fetish. Having an attraction towards a body part doesn't make it a fetish.
"Sexual fetishism, sexual attraction to objects, body parts, or situations not conventionally viewed as being sexual in nature."... (read in full...)
Is it okay to have two wives?
Q. I have 7-year old wife to whom I have loved somuch and trust but later I realized she had had hidden lot of past history, for which I have gone through the hell and got fed up with thinking about but not able to leave her and go away and I had many ...
A. 2 December 2011: The question is rather: is it legal in India to have two wives? If it is not legal then you can go to prison for it. If it is legal then that is your decision to make together with your wife. ... (read in full...)
I've pretended everything is ok, but want to break up with him. How do I do that when he thinks everything is great?
Q. I have been dating this guy for about 6 months, we are not official but it was definitely heading that way. I have always been iffy about the idea of being with him coz he was a player but I thought Id give him a chance. He hasn't done anything ...
A. 2 December 2011: Your mistake was to not vocalize the issues as they came along. No relationship will ever work for you if you keep things hidden and don't deal with issues as they come. It all just builds up, nor is it fair on your partner as they have no clue you ... (read in full...)
I always thought love should feel like you are falling in love again every day but I realised thats not possible, now I'm worried I have ruined my relationship because of this....
Q. I think I'm addicted to the feeling of falling in love, the one that's not supposed to last. I always pictured my dream relationship to be like I'm falling in love with the person all over again every day for the rest of my life. But now I see that ...
A. 1 December 2011: He doesn't sound right for you. I also like the "in love" feeling, and while I agree, for some it will be lost and the relationship takes on a new form, I also believe that if you want to you can keep that feeling alive by courting each other and ... (read in full...)
"Momma's boy" - attractive or not to women?
Q. Want to get some feedback from women here... I grew up without a father so my mother had to be both parents in a way. As a result, I've always been a "Momma's boy". She's not protective or invasive in my personal life we just have a very solid and ...
A. 1 December 2011: It's good to be close with your mother. What has made you think you should pull away? Has a woman pulled away from you strictly because of this? I think it is a good thing that you are close to your mother, as long as you understand, and are capable ... (read in full...)
Has anyone had any problems with taking the morning after pill (norlevo) ?
Q. Anyone have any problems from taking the morning after pill.. {NorLevo}.. Do you think its ok to take this medication in a emergency? ...
A. 1 December 2011: I get dizzy from it, and some times tired, but other than that no problems with it. If you take more than one in each menstrual cycle it messes up your cycle, so avoid that. It's ok to take it when there is a need for it, why would it be wrong?... (read in full...)
Having sex again after 12 days really hurt! Why?
Q. Me and my boyfriend hadn't had sex for 12 days- couldn't get a house to ourselves. We finally managed today, and it hurt like a *****. It was the same sort of pain I felt when I lost my virginity. It felt like I was being torn down there and brough...
A. 30 November 2011: My bet is that you weren't lubricated enough. Too much friction, or you were too eager and went at it too fast, again causing too much friction. Friction is alpha and omega in these cases, too much will make you hurt, no matter how many times you've ... (read in full...)
Ladies, once you meet a new interesting guy, when do you allow that first intimate touch?
Q. Ledies, you meet a new interesting guy. When do you allow that first intimate touch? Is it any different if you meet him while you're hurting from a recent break up? Your answers are important to me....
A. 30 November 2011: What's the first "intimate" touch? Touch my genitals you mean? That happens only after we've already been together a few weeks into an official relationship. ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to have a satisfying sexual life if your boyfriend has never made you have an orgasm?
Q. Is it possible to have a satisfying sexual life if your boyfriend (of 2 years) doesn't know how to and has never made you orgasm? At first it didn't bother me...but now I'm beginning to feel like he has given up on trying to please me and only wan...
A. 30 November 2011: Why are you finishing yourself off alone? Integrate your orgasm in your sex life with him and you will not feel that it is missing or that you are unfulfilled. A vibrator used on you while he is inside you feel pleasurable for the man as well. And ... (read in full...)
Why do guys find it easy to orgasm, but many women never do?
Q. You always read about women having problems with this. Yet never any guys. Why is this? Is it because it's more taboo if a women does?...
A. 30 November 2011: It's a matter of fact thing. Nothing to do with taboos. It is difficult for most women to orgasm because our bodies are built different, and stimulating our clitoris isn't as easy as stimulating a penis. It's just because of the way we are built ... (read in full...)
I want a baby but my bf wants to first better financial situation. What should I do?
Q. Im 16 and lost twins 4 months and i was 5 months pregnant, it was the hardest thing ive ever had to go throu but my boyfriend was really supportive. after just getting sorted about forgetting loosing my twins ive started to really want another baby ...
A. 30 November 2011: Wait. You are a young teenager, you are in absolutely no hurry. If you were 20 years older I could understand the rush, but at 16-17 there is no rush. You are still suffering from the loss of your twins, but becoming pregnant again will not replace ... (read in full...)
I'm obsessed with my boyfriend's ex!
Q. i started dating my current (and first) boyfriend 7 months ago and everything's great - we love each other a lot, rarely fight, etc. issues started coming up however when i found out that he lied about several random and unimportant thin...
A. 30 November 2011: It is odd that he would lie and hide this from you if none of it was his fault. Because by doing that he is making it his fault by action. So it is ondeed odd why someone with no fault at all would lie and hide things away... Maybe your boyfriend ... (read in full...)
I'm currently stressed out and confused about what I'm doing in life.
Q. I'm currently stressed out and confused about what I'm doing in life. I'm 8 or so weeks into my Masters in a biological science, and I don't know if this is where I should be. To cut a long story short, I've always been much more passionate about...
A. 29 November 2011: Go with the flow of things and see what happens. If your life is meant to be spent on "the arts" (maybe you could explain what exactly you mean by that?) then it will happen and the opportunities will arise. But I don't see how jumping from this ... (read in full...)
I'm obsessed with my boyfriend's ex!
Q. i started dating my current (and first) boyfriend 7 months ago and everything's great - we love each other a lot, rarely fight, etc. issues started coming up however when i found out that he lied about several random and unimportant thin...
A. 29 November 2011: The sad part is that you're not really obsessed about his ex. You don't care about her. You do however care about how your boyfriend treats you in comparison to her. He treats her as his girlfriend, or at least doesn't feel the need to correct ... (read in full...)
I feel he did not respect my 'No" when he requested anal sex and I have refused that and his other request. I don't know enough about it, like does it hurt?
Q. My boyfriend has recently requested anal sex, and he has also said he would like to ejaculate on my face. When he first asked if we could have anal sex I said no. I have tried it before (not actual sex, but similar) and didn't really enjoy it....
A. 28 November 2011: I didn't mean to say you find him horrible for doing this.. I just felt that others commented you should find a new boyfriend, as if this was such a horrible thing to do that you should leave him over it. I certainly do not think this is worth ... (read in full...)
Is ejaculating in a woman's mouth more degrading than on her face?
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 6 years now, and really want to ejaculate in her mouth, she can't stand the taste. She wants me to ejaculate on her face, but I feel that's degrading....what do you guys suggest....?...
A. 28 November 2011: Ah, yes, the practical aspect: you do not want sperm in your hair! It's difficult to get away, which is why I don't want sperm in my face. I don't mind sperm in my face as such, but I worry about getting it in my hair. So I prefer to have it on my ... (read in full...)
The man who I thought of as a father figure has started hitting on me and I think its disgusting!
Q. Hi all, I am feeling so pathetic right now. So I recently got to know this particular someone through my work. He was like a father figure as he was very helpful and I felt like he treated me like a daughter-ish or you know, like h...
A. 28 November 2011: What are you crying about? So the man is hitting on you, so what? Does it mean you have to marry him? No, it doesn't. Treat it like you treat anyone else unwanted who hits on you, give them a firm rejection.
If you are letting something like thi... (read in full...)
I feel he did not respect my 'No" when he requested anal sex and I have refused that and his other request. I don't know enough about it, like does it hurt?
Q. My boyfriend has recently requested anal sex, and he has also said he would like to ejaculate on my face. When he first asked if we could have anal sex I said no. I have tried it before (not actual sex, but similar) and didn't really enjoy it....
A. 28 November 2011: I got stuck at the wording here. He "requested" anal sex. What are you, a wending machine? Are you offering some service that he is paying for? He can't be "requesting" anything, you aren't a restaurant offering him things from some menu.
What ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend spoils me to the point where its become uncomfortable!!
Q. So ive only been dating my boyfriend for a few weeks now, but i feel like he spoils me entirely TOO much, as selfish as that sounds, in a way it kind of makes me feel helpless like im incapable of doing anything myself. I told him about it, and he ...
A. 28 November 2011: He's one of those guys who don't think he deserves your love, probably he has put you on a pedestal to be worshiped, and now he's making as many sacrifices as he possibly can to make sure he gets to keep you. It'll burn him out eventually, and ... (read in full...)
I'm still living with the "ugly-younger-me" mentality even though I've now grown to be this gorgeous woman.
Q. I have serious body image issues. It all spawned from chronic low self esteem, depression, etc... I used to be fat and ugly and guys and girls would bully me over it.. Until one day I blossomed, and I'm what people call "gorgeous" but I genuinely do ...
A. 28 November 2011: Someone out there can help you help yourself. Therapy. That's what you need. Otherwise it'll take you some good 10-15 years to work through this on your own, only to get to a point you could be at withing 5 years if you see a therapist.
Tell ... (read in full...)
I broke up with the woman of my dreams. Why did I do that? What can I do now?
Q. I'm 33. She is 30. Last year I met her and she was the best woman I have ever met. Gorgeous woman, had her own home in a great part of town, was referring to me moving in with her but for some reason I decided it wouldn't work. I ended up mee...
A. 28 November 2011: Nope. You don't get her back when she is happily with someone else. That's a no-no. She'll lose respect for you if you try, if that respect hasn't been lost already when you dumped her for no apparent reason.
Have you thought about why you did ... (read in full...)
Why do men become too familiar so quickly?
Q. What is it with men who act way too familiar with you on the first few dates?? I've gone out with a few men who act like were already married on a first date. I say that because people will ask how long we've known each other and I'll say " 2 days" ...
A. 28 November 2011: Unhealthy. And yes, they tend to loose interest fast as well. Imagine, if it took them two days to get hooked on you, it'll take them two days to get hooked on someone else too.
People need to take it slow when entering a relationship and actu... (read in full...)
Is ejaculating in a woman's mouth more degrading than on her face?
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 6 years now, and really want to ejaculate in her mouth, she can't stand the taste. She wants me to ejaculate on her face, but I feel that's degrading....what do you guys suggest....?...
A. 28 November 2011: Ejaculating on the woman you love, no matter where, is not degrading. It's only degrading if you personally have added such a meaning to it. The act in itself, worldwide, is not considered to be degrading. However in certain porn movies certain acts ... (read in full...)
| *higirl's friends
These are mutual friends, so *higirl has
added them and they have added *higirl!
|
![kitty-cat=] agony aunt](/avatars/4e276644-588c-43d2-bf37-fe35b92660b5.png){kind=small}
