| Latest articles: Just Two
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31 March 2011: I recently read something nice that I would like to share.... JUST TWO. Donate blood twice a year. Donate your eyes after death. Thank God twice a day. Write two letters a week. Visit two ailing people a month. Say two words of gratitude-"...
A little humility goes a long way
This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 March 2011: I’ve been a moderator here on DC for a while and it’s a great forum. It really irritates me though when the OP shows no regard for the aunts who’ve taken time to answer questions. We moderators don’t know you, yet we spend time poring over ever...
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I just really wish I knew if he really likes me or if I'm just being used.
Q. I really like this guy, we work together and know each other for about two years. All we are right now is friends. About six months ago we started to have sex and he doesn't want anyone to know because its no ones business. Well we still do and we ...
A. 27 January 2013: If there was ever a no-brainer, this is the one!
Wake up and smell the coffee OP!! This guy uses you for sex but you are just a dirty little secret that he doesnt want anyone to know about. And now you're borrows money from you because he knows... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend called after 4 years! Do I phone him back?
Q. Today i received a missed call from my ex boyfriend. I haven't seen him since end of 2008! When we were together, i did lend him money (one of the things i regret the most and never do that now!) and i have never got it back. I'm confused why he ...
A. 26 January 2013: Dont call him back. Let him get back to you himself if he really has any work.... (read in full...)
Do relationships develop from sleeping with someone you have just met?
Q. Do relationships develop from sex? I’ve always been the type of person who hasn't slept around and would never let myself be used by a fella for sex. By doing this I think I have kept men at arm’s length and therefore have never developed any long...
A. 22 January 2013: Its very unlikely for a relationship to develop from sleeping with someone u just met. If you give sex that easily, then you will not be respected for who you are, you'll just be the girl who is ready to have sex on the first date. Any guy who is ... (read in full...)
I'm playing with fire with an 18 year old co-worker that also works with my wife
Q. I'm 36 and have been married for 15 years,we have 3 children and have been happy for most of our married life. I've recently been getting feelings for an 18 year old girl at work and we have been flirting by text and she claims she fancies me ...
A. 20 January 2013: If she has problems then she can talk to a counselor or someone who can genuinely help her. Don't fall into this crap about being a shoulder to cry on. She doesn't need the support of a married man to help her out and in any case what can you do, ... (read in full...)
Am I a loser for not drinking or doing drugs? Will I find a girl to date?
Q. How can I be comfortable with the fact that I dont drink or do drugs. Last night, I went out with my friends to a partyhiuse and there was rndless amounts of drinks and drugs there. I never drink, so I am the sober one. I have some friends who do ...
A. 17 January 2013: I like what Sageoldguy said.
You are not a loser, you are the opposite of it. I dont smoke or drink either and I'm proud of my choices. Good for you, to stick for what you think is right. Always stay true to yourself. ... (read in full...)
Should I feel guilty that I've stopped being a customer at a shop because of expenses?
Q. Should I feel guilty about this? For several years now I have got on very well with a local shop where I buy my lunch. They treat me like a daughter. But this year I need to conserve my money as I know I have some big expenses later this year....
A. 15 January 2013: This is simple. Just tell them whatever you've told us. That you want to cut down on expenses and that's why you wont be buying food from them. But you will always be like their daughter and they mean a lot to you and this move of yours will have no ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my husband to evict him? And that I've been flirting with the younger cute male student we sub-let a room to?
Q. Times have been hard lately for my husband and I so we got a room mate to help split the rent of our 3 bedroom 3 bathroom home.I'm 27 and my husband is 29 our new room mate is a 20 year old college student, pretty quit and geeky. I'm a stay at home ...
A. 15 January 2013: Get a hold on yourself. Don't ruin your marriage for a few moments of pleasure, its not worth it. Get a job to help with the money and distract yourself.... (read in full...)
Should I tell my husband that I cheated on my ex with a co-worker? Or leave the past in the past?
Q. Been happily married for a few months after I'd been with my ex for a few years. Do you think I should tell my husband I cheated on my ex and had a six-month affair with a co-worker? Now I don't have any contacts with either my ex nor my former a...
A. 11 January 2013: Why would you want your husband to know this? Whatever happened with the ex, stays with the ex. Your husband need not know anything as long as it isn't affecting your marriage in any way now. Leave the past behind. Retroactive jealousy is a terrible ... (read in full...)
How do I cope? He's going on and I feel like I've been kicked in the stomach
Q. Soooo me and this guy were seeing eachother for 4 months. The relationship was so rocky it wasn't funny! Every (bleeping) week he would find some excuse of why he couldn't be with me. Then when i tried to leave he would come back and say "baby i ...
A. 10 January 2013: OP you were treated very badly by your ex but you chose to be treated like that. The very first time that he told you he couldn't be with you, you should have told him, "Fine, your loss. Goodbye." But you didn't, and the fact that you kept going ... (read in full...)
When my boyfriend has any problem, he goes to his best friend (a girl) and not me!
Q. Hey everyone,I'v been dating my boyfriend for over 4 years,my boyfriend has this best friend who is a girl and they have been friends since kindergarden and over the years I'v become friends with her too,we hang out together..BUT I really feel bad ...
A. 8 January 2013: I'm with SVC on this one. I dont understand the concept of having best friends from the opposite sex. If they're THAT close then why aren't they a couple? And if he's choosing to share his problems with this Remi person instead of with you, then ... (read in full...)
She lost interest in me because I let her pay for her part of the meal on our first date!
Q. I had a situation with a woman I really liked, and need you opinion on this. I 've met this girl in a building that I work at. She works for a different company, and I saw her several times at lunch before we started talking. We just talked for ...
A. 8 January 2013: That's just how she thinks OP and I'm afraid you cant do anything to undo what you've done. To be honest, I too would be slightly offended if my date couldn't even foot my share of the bill of appetizers and some wine. It doesn't come to much and ... (read in full...)
I'm still having trouble accepting my boyfriend's past
Q. I've been with a great guy for the last year...but I'm still having trouble accepting his past. He's the only guy I've even slept (or done anything sexual) with, but he has 4 exes that he's been with. I think about it everyday, wondering if he ...
A. 7 January 2013: There have been innumerable questions here on DC on retroactive jealousy. I think many of us, at some point of time or the other have compared ourselves to our partner's ex'es. Its natural to but it crosses the line when it consumes your life, which ... (read in full...)
Should I leave my boyfriend for his best mate?
Q. I've fallen for my boyfriends best mate and I don't know how to handle it. They play on the same football team locally and as I wash all the kits, we got to know each other without my boyfriend there. We have a lot in common and just clicked....
A. 6 January 2013: If this isn't cheating, then what is? Leave them both and try and regain some dignity before you do anything else. ... (read in full...)
My jealous girlfriend is making my life miserable
Q. Hi everyone. Hope you can give me some advice. My girlfriend of one year is very jealous and insecure. She is pressuring me to ask me to marry her lately. She is a fun girl to be with and I like her a lot. But I am not ready for marriage. My ...
A. 6 January 2013: OP when you unfriend someone from Facebook, it usually signals the end of friendship. Why else would you unfriend them? Your friend has every right at being mad at you because what you did was rude. And its not making a mountain out of a molehill. ... (read in full...)
Is my Gf cheating on me with my mate? Or am I being paranoid?
Q. Okay so it all started when my mate first stayed round my Girlfriend's house and she said he could stay in the bed with us. I didn't think anything at this time I just didn't like it and in the end I just made him sleep on the floor. Then he st...
A. 5 January 2013: She's cheating on you with your friend OP, there's no doubt about that. You need to get them both out of your life. ... (read in full...)
How do you know if someone is right for you?
Q. When you've found the one if there is such a thing, do you question it? or little things about them that just don't seem like an ideal fit with you. I was in love a long time ago. crazy, stupid, love. I just adored him. (I'm over him now, and don...
A. 28 December 2012: There is really no "perfect" person for anyone. I too was like you at one point of time and when I was with this particular guy, I was madly besotted with him. I thought that this was what people meant when they spoke about "eternal love"! I was ... (read in full...)
Shall I trust him or not? My friends say he only sees girls for a short time and then dumps them. I don't want to be hurt.
Q. Just recently, one of my friends invited this guy to a movie with me and a couple of friends. He seemed really nice, and we'd been texting each other quite a bit. He then randomly told me he liked me, just completly out of the blue. I have to sa...
A. 26 December 2012: I have to say this 3 days rule seems really weird. Does that mean that he has sex with them and then dumps them? How does he manage to convince all the girls to do it so soon? Somethings not quite right here!
Anyway, there's no harm in dating h... (read in full...)
Is it reasonable that I expect, and I am waiting for him to make the first move?
Q. Three months ago I met a guy and we both are in love with each other. Though we live quite far apart we have met a number of times to spend time with each other but we haven't yet been intimate. We talk to each other daily but my problem is t...
A. 26 December 2012: How do you know that this guy is in love with you? Has he told you so himself? You say that he hasnt even asked you out yet and that's what you're waiting for, then how can you be sure that he loves you?
In any case, if you talk daily then you... (read in full...)
Ended affair last night.What can I do? Is there any point in hoping she could leave him? Or was I just played by her?
Q. I have no one else to talk to. For past year I have been in affair with coworker. Last summer we agreed that we will leave our partners and be together. I did it, she did not so I went NC for next two months. This autumn she started chasi...
A. 24 December 2012: You have done the right thing OP. This woman will never leave her husband; if she wanted to, then she would have done so a long time back. She's just having a bit of convenient fun with you on the side and she wants the best of both worlds. I know ... (read in full...)
I can't stop snooping on my boyfriend!
Q. I can't stop sying on my bf's social networking mailbox and phone! We got together in summer and he lived in states, we were casual but as he was travelling around europe, he decided to come back and see me again, i told him as long as he ...
A. 24 December 2012: OP no one can tell you for sure if your boyfriend is cheating or not but you are going to drive yourself crazy by your own behavior. For me personally, a relationship depends on trust and if you don't trust your partner then its doomed. You will be ... (read in full...)
He says he doesn't know if we can be more than FWB!
Q. For about a few weeks now, ive had sexual relations with a guy i work with. He is the most attractive guy ive ever been with, and has a beautiful personality. Im completely taken by him, i love his smile, his eyes, his hugs, etc...i wake up excited ...
A. 23 December 2012: If he had feelings for you, then he would have told you so. If a guy really loves a girl then he will go to the end of the world to be with her. Playing games would be the last thing on his mind. As regards this guy, he's not going to commit to you ... (read in full...)
My guy is going bald - HELP!!!
Q. My guy is going bald!!!!!! I dont want to leave him, but he looks too elder than me! What do I do? He is ready to do anything if I have the solution..Pls help me! He is just 25! and Am 23 !! :-( :-( Am so sad abt his baldness..Am trying to support ...
A. 22 December 2012: Remember, what cant be cured must be endured. You cant really do anything to stop the balding, its hereditary and based on genetic background so just accept it and get used to it.... (read in full...)
How can I help? What can my Girl friend do about her obsessed ex?
Q. My girlfriends has an obsessed man who just refuses to leave her alone he keeps texting her and she can't change because her number is on her C.Vs that she has given in Her mother has passed away recently and today is her burial,I could not attend...
A. 22 December 2012: OP you cant possibly guard your girlfriend every second of every day. There will be times like this when she will be alone and you have to be prepared for that. Inform the police immediately and provide them will all details of this man. Keep a ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend was angry that I was ill and didn't want sex so he left late and left my door unlocked all night!
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been in an exclusive relationship for over 2 1/2 years we are both middle aged, and live in our separate homes, but we spend almost every night together. Last night my boyfriend comes over later than normal because he had a...
A. 20 December 2012: This guy doesn't seem to think that you are his girlfriend because he's treating you even worse than an FWB. All he wants from you is sex and if he doesnt get it, he doesnt think its worth staying over or being with you. If this were a proper ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he is 50% happy with me but I don't satisfy him sexually like his ex did. Should I have a threesome with them to make him happy?
Q. I purposed an idea to my boyfriend a couple of days ago. The idea having a threesome with him and his ex. Sounds bizarre, good thing I slept on it and really thought about how it will impact the relationship and everyone involved lives. Question ...
A. 19 December 2012: I am shocked at how low your boyfriend has managed to stoop and at the fact that your self esteem is actually lower than rock bottom! What is wrong with you? Read what you've written! This man cheated on you, continues to cheat on you, compares you ... (read in full...)
Massively stressed out about taking a test for a new job....help!
Q. So tomorrow I have this huge test: it's an exam in order to get a super awesome job (actually if you pass this test, you get the chance to have an interview for the job). Loads of people are taking this test and only 35% of them passed it today. A...
A. 19 December 2012: Yay!! Good for you! Congratulations!! :)
... (read in full...)
Massively stressed out about taking a test for a new job....help!
Q. So tomorrow I have this huge test: it's an exam in order to get a super awesome job (actually if you pass this test, you get the chance to have an interview for the job). Loads of people are taking this test and only 35% of them passed it today. A...
A. 17 December 2012: First things first, stop freaking out because that wont help you in any way. Whatever has to happen, will. All you can do is put in your best effort and leave the rest to fate. And always, hope for the best and prepare for the worst.
The reason I... (read in full...)
Breakup came out of the blue and the hurt from it is so intense. How do I get over it?
Q. just looking for a bit of help. Im 18, and i've just broken up with my first serious boyfriend (together 6 months). I thought everything was perfect so its very out of the blue that he decided to split up with me as i wasnt expecting it at all. The ...
A. 17 December 2012: Never cry over someone who wont cry over you. Someone had once told me that you will have your heart broken again and again before you find the right person. I know its not very comforting to hear now but it jut shows that you have company. Most of ... (read in full...)
Do you think this text was meant for some-one else?
Q. Do you think txt was meant for someone else? Jsut want to know if you think im being paranoid or is this dodgy, A guy I have been seeing for a year now has been away to a friends birthday for the weekend. He has sent me a message everyday while he's ...
A. 17 December 2012: Are you in a committed relationship with him? If yes, then you need to be very cautious because that text definitely wasn't meant for you. If its a casual relationship where you are just seeing each other but are also open to dating other people, ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend says he wants to be with me after I cheated but he's calling me names!
Q. I cheated on my boyfriend of a year in a really bad way. I've been honest about it and admitted it. I'd like to work it out and understand he is angry, disgusted and a lot of other things. He says he wants to be with me...BUT he keeps calling me ...
A. 17 December 2012: Although your boyfriend says he has forgiven you, he clearly hasn't. Forgiveness isn't that easy and you need to be a really mature person to be able to truly forgive someone who has hurt you. In your case, he is abusing you and he has no right to ... (read in full...)
Guilt over my drunken mistake is eating me up.
Q. A little while ago I cheated on my boyfriend when I was very very drunk. It was a stupid thing to do and I regret it so so much. It meant absolutely nothing to me so I decided not to tell my boyfriend about it. However the guilt is eating me up, ...
A. 15 December 2012: The guilt will continue to consume you unless you decide to come clean. But that needs courage and I doubt if you can get yourself to do it. Also, no matter how horribly drunk you might be, you CANNOT possibly sleep with someone else, unless you ... (read in full...)
Is keeping things from exes and stealing panties normal for a guy?
Q. I've been dating my bf 8 months now. Everything felt perfect at first, like it was meant to be and everyone still says so, but I feel uncomfortable with him lately. He keeps presents and cards saying "I love you" etc. from past girlfriends. He ...
A. 15 December 2012: Ewww no!! Stealing panties and masturbating to them is definitely not normal!! Its creepy, to say the very least! If you feel gross around him (and I dont blame you!) then break up with him and find yourself a less creepy boyfriend... (read in full...)
How faithful can a girl can be in a LDR when temptations are everywhere?
Q. Hi, im in a ldr for about 7 months and we both are in love. due to our job and school compromises we wont be able to move together until in 2 years or so. so far we have been seeing each other every two months and will be on the same basis, maybe ...
A. 13 December 2012: It is completely possible to remain committed to one partner and it all depends on the person in question. I'm speaking for myself here, but if I were in an LDR, the question of temptations and cheating with other men would never, EVER cross my ... (read in full...)
My older boyfriend said we need a break so I can take some time to think about myself and my feelings, what does he mean by this?
Q. My boyfriend said this classical line "We need a break". I was shocked and all, but to tell the truth I was expecting it. Why? Well... you see... He's like 24 years older than me (he's 42, I'm 18), he's divorced, has 3 kids (two girls, 22 and ...
A. 13 December 2012: k_c has summed it all up brilliantly.
Learn from this relationship and move on, that's all. There is no future with this man because you are younger than his eldest child. That is a lot to deal with! Maybe being with such a young person was an i... (read in full...)
Out of control PMS, I've tried EVERYTHING, please help me!
Q. I'm at my wits end here and really need some advice. I am a 25 year old woman. I'm generally a happy person who enjoys life. But the week (sometimes 2 weeks) before my period I feel as though I go absolutely INSANE! I'm extremely angry, depr...
A. 13 December 2012: I'll be of no help here but I can relate to just about every single feeling of yours because I too have terrible PMS. Unfortunately there's no cure for it or if there is, then I certainly haven't discovered any. I've tried everything just like you ... (read in full...)
My ex boyfriend left me pregnant, doesn't care to see our child or pay for anything,
Q. My ex boyfriend left me pregnant, we already have a child together and he has two before me. When we broke up the first time, he was on craigslist looking for men and women for sex and i took him back, he was looking at porn also and when we were ...
A. 12 December 2012: Since you've asked for an opinion, here's mine.
You have been extremely reckless in getting pregnant with a man who you clearly knew was not trustworthy and now your children have to bear the brunt of your behavior. You knew that he was looking ... (read in full...)
My B/f slept with my best friend while we were broken up and I cant get this out of my head
Q. So, I'm engaged to a guy I have dated previously for about a year... We were so much alike we fought all the time, nothing serious, just bickering. I was, and still am, very much in love with him! Problem is, I found out when we recently got back ...
A. 11 December 2012: You're getting mad at your best friend OP but it took two people to have sex and one of them was your boyfriend. Please don't tell me that he's so awfully naive that he believed all that your friend told him. Doesn't he trust you at all? And what ... (read in full...)
I gave him my number, didn't hear from him. He said I gave him the wrong number and now I'm not hearing from him again.
Q. I just started a new job where the building was having major renovations and met one of the guys doing it - he will not be working with me permanently. He is extremely attractive so naturally spent lots of time ogling him! Which seemed to be a ...
A. 11 December 2012: He doesnt seem interested OP and he didnt have the guts to tell you that, that's why he lied about the wrong number. Let him go. If he wants he can always get back to you. You've done your bit and its pretty obvious to him that you're interested.... (read in full...)
How do I feel confident when my crush said I was unaatractive?
Q. I'm not pretty and i don't think any guys will love me because i'm ugly. Every girl that i've have known who had a boyfriend were pretty and then there's me who wants a boyfriend and to know what it feels like to be loved. People find me ugly ...
A. 11 December 2012: Your crush is a jerk. He's an ass who doesn't know how to respect people and he's thinks he's God's gift to mankind. Who is he to say that you are unattractive? Dark skin and afro hair do not make anyone unattractive. That's part of who you are, ... (read in full...)
My FWB says that he's not cheating on his girlfriend with me because apparently I'm not a service , I'm just a girl who he likes in lust
Q. I am 19 years of age and now is in an affair with a man who is 29 who has a girlfriend he has been dating for 8 years. He says shes his best friend, with her he has a so called life , clean clothes to wear. But he is unsure if he wants/or is going ...
A. 11 December 2012: Wow! How did you manage to find the biggest asshole on this planet? He's a liar and a cheater and he's just fooling himself because if THIS is not cheating, then what is? And you already have become a boyfriend stealer and unless you want to end up ... (read in full...)
My feelings for her have re-emerged and anyone else seems bland by comparison!
Q. So... basically, i'm in love with one of my friends. i've known her for quite some time now (about 5 years) and have loved her ever since. when i knew that i had feelings for her, i took my courage in both hands and confessed my feelings for her. ...
A. 10 December 2012: OP you might really love this girl but you have to accept that if its not to be, then its not going to happen. You cant obviously force her to like you and frankly its her loss if she doesn't because you sound like a nice person. Let her go, ... (read in full...)
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