He told me I may not be the one he wants but I'm the one he needs!
Q. The title says it all. My boyfriend and I have been dating for about six months and we've been recently having fights about the direction of our relationship. He always tells me how beautiful I am and how much he loves me and is in love with ...
A. 18 November 2012: I'm afraid that your B/F came up a bit short on the TOTAL meaning(s) of "want" and "need". So, let me help you....
He "wants" you to be his arm-candy so that he can show you off to his guy-friends... AND he won't have to sit home on Friday a... (read in full...)
Does my ex want to make another go of it?
Q. Hi i need some advice. I have been split up with my ex since the summer, we have been sleeping with each other on/off since then. We both seen other people but on both sides its fizzled out. I'm confused, he's making more of an effort now texti...
A. 18 November 2012: Here's an interesting take on couples who are split:
When a couple splits, the guy is CERTAIN that there are oodles of girls "out there" who are waiting for him... just DYING to be his sexual conquests..... What he soon learns is that he is one o... (read in full...)
In a complicated physical relationship with my Professor. I love him but he doesn't love me. Any solutions or advise?
Q. I am 20 years old and recently I got a physical relationship with my professor who is about 16 years older than me. I can't prevent myself when he comes closer or touches or kisses me. He is very serious about study and concerned about the careers ...
A. 18 November 2012: I believe that you have revealed 'way more than you expected in your post....
First: There is NO REASON for a faculty member to have ANY SORT of "physical" relationship, or goings-on, with ANY of the students in his/her classes. THAT is patently... (read in full...)
Why do men distance themselves when they are so into you?
Q. Hi all, My question is about why men distance themselves when they are so into you? I know for sure he likes me so much, but always keeps a guard up with me. He is shy and talks and acts nervous around me. He is 39 so not a boy. By now he should ...
A. 17 November 2012: I would guess that you may have a mistaken notion in your submittal...... AND, if I am correct it explains all. To wit:
You write: ".... why men distance themselves when they are so into you?"
IF "... so in to you...." means that you are put... (read in full...)
I broke up with him because of his behavior. Have I overreacted?
Q. Im in college living on campus with my friends in an aparment and I've been in a relationship for almost four years now and I've finally had enough of the stuff that he put me though so I broke up with him. He has almost expected me to be there at ...
A. 17 November 2012: I see that you have actually answered YOUR OWN QUESTION. See it there???.... You write: "I don't want to fall back in his trap..."
So, don't....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I flirt with my wife's slutty friends. Could this be a reason for her going cold on me?
Q. My wife has friends who are slutty and easy but when we go out I tend to flirt with them and carry on like i'm interested, but really I only like the thought and sometimes the occasional petting. I dont want my wife to freak if I'm ever caught in a...
A. 17 November 2012: You could START by discontinuing acting like an A*S........ (read in full...)
I love him so much. But is lack of money our real problem in this LDR? Or are there other things to consider?
Q. First off I will say that my friend of 8 years has told me he loves me for all of the things we have in common, values, beliefs, understanding and acceptance of each others past and present we were raised similar, everything . I love him to bits, ...
A. 16 November 2012: I'm unawares of any real connection between money and REAL love.... IF you and he ARE in love - and are "meant" to be together - then there is no reason to even MENTION "money."
Good luck.... You two sound like a young couple who is catching... (read in full...)
So worried about what will happen if we break up. Will I find anyone else?
Q. I am 28 years old and I think I might lose my first girlfriend. She was the first woman I've ever been with. I lost my virginity to her. But lately we haven't been getting along so well. I'm so worried what will happen if we break up. I may never ...
A. 16 November 2012: WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?????? You are a mere 25 years old, or so.... and have no less that 2/3 of your life ahead of you!!!!!
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Are the intentions of this man innocent?
Q. I am attracted to a man who happens to be married but will not ever do more than occasionally think about him. He has always been kind of flirtatious and he gives me vibes and looks of admiration. I always hear his wife criticizing him over the ...
A. 16 November 2012: I think this is the key phrase in your submittal:
"...Why do I want to know? ..."
It's the "key phrase" because it is SO a-propos.... that is: You are speaking of this married man as if it makes one iota of difference WHAT you think.
Are yo... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says I keep him on the straight and narrow. When I'm not around he's out drinking with friends
Q. My boyfriend is lovely to hang out with, but if he's not with me, he just goes into town and spends the evening drinking. Yesterday I was with him and he was saying he was still poorly so didn't want to do much. But he was just hungover from two ...
A. 16 November 2012: Yes. This "man" is still a child.... and YOU have to make the decision of having a "boyfriend/mate/partner" who is an adult..... or having one who is an adult......
Good luck........ (read in full...)
Am I weird for thinking this girl was hotter when she was dressed more casually?
Q. Maybe this is an odd question to ask, but I went on a date with this girl last night and i've only ever seen this girl on nights out when she is in her heels, fitted dresses and i suppose she wears more make up. We were only going for a drink, so i ...
A. 15 November 2012: Sometimes, women get so enamored of their exterior appearance that they fail to understand just what it is that we guys "see" when we look at them....
Obviously, as you describe, you saw this lady-friend dressed casually, and - as most of us do - ... (read in full...)
All the girls go for my good looking friend instead of me!
Q. A friend of mine is the total opposite of me. He is 6'2 with blond hair and has stunning looks and he works out. I'm 5'8, work out and play sports, but don't look stunning like he does. I've been told I am handsome by older family and that is it. ...
A. 15 November 2012: For the longest time.... all the cute girls in my town were enamored of - and dated and spent time with and put out for - the "cool" guys.... those on the football team, those who had hot cars... those who had access to liquor...
I - in the mean... (read in full...)
I've only ever had sex with prostitutes. Should I continue or try having a relationship? And should I keep my past secret?
Q. Hello, I have been using prostitutes for about 4 years. I lost my virginity to a prostitute and ever since I only had sex with "working girls". The reason I do this is that it is so much simpler than picking-up women and far more straight...
A. 15 November 2012: A man whose sex experience occurs with prostitutes is generally seen as a man who is unable to start and maintain a real, regular and traditional relationship with "regular" women....
IF you are content with your current arrangement (sex with pro... (read in full...)
'Making Love' versus 'Having Sex' with boyfriend.
Q. So I guess this is a question about lovemaking vs sex. I had spent the day with my boyfriend and he was helping me studying. Then after several hours I had to go out to do something else, and we were kissing a bit, and I said, I have to go, and ...
A. 15 November 2012: We guys speak and interesting dialect of English, in which "making love" and "having sex" and "doing nik-nik" all mean the same thing!!!!!
Remember: For a guy, it's all about getting his you-know-what in to some place that is warm, soft and wet.... (read in full...)
I'm an intelligent woman losing her wits over a crush on my professor!
Q. Adult Woman Crush on Professor, This is extremely distracting to me. I have not been able to fully focus in class, I got my first B+ in a class that is an easy A+ (due to the fact I was more concerned how I looked prior to class than going over ...
A. 14 November 2012: You may be highly intelligent... but you aren't using your "street smarts" to be sure that your school-girl crush doesn't impede your ability to study properly...
Work on that....
Good luck........ (read in full...)
How old were you the first time you had sex? How was it?
Q. Hello I'm curious to know in what age you had first time sex(intercourse), and how was it?...
A. 14 November 2012: I was 18 YO the first time. It was absolutely delicious... and has been ever since.....
SVC: Would you like to see if we can do something/anything to make it one of your favorite activities??????... (read in full...)
Should I go out with this guy that is only asking to keep me happy, or date a guy and feel like I've betrayed the guy I'm seeing?
Q. I have a really sensitive issue - I've been seeing this guy that is completely commitment-phobic, he refuses to even consider dating me, but he's all over me, can't manage a single night without cuddling up in bed with me, it's not sex, it's ju...
A. 14 November 2012: Congratulations! You have now arranged for TWO guys to fawn over you.... and neither one sounds much like dating/relationship material....
If you were my Sister, I'd tell you to leave BOTH of them alone and wait until you encountered a REAL pro... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he doesn't want any kids so why does he always want sex when I am at the most fertile time?
Q. my bf of ovr 22 yrs says he doesnt want more kids, but the way he acts during sex and how he seems to not be so worried about geting me pregnant and asking when every month my period is due and we always eem to have sex only during the most ...
A. 14 November 2012: What YOU need to figure out is whether or not you'll be happy when he DOES, finally, knock you up....
After all,... you're fully aware of what he's trying to do.... and - nowhere in your submittal - do I see that you are trying NOT to be bred....... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend acting so weird when he texts this one particular number?
Q. I'm concerned about some funny behavior with my boyfriend and I would like some opinions. Our history - we haven't been dating long. Four or five months, but we got very close very fast, and we both love each other and have expressed that t...
A. 14 November 2012: No, you are not "being paranoid."
What is "going on" is that he is texting with his OTHER girlfriend, and he it trying to hide that (ESPECIALLY her phone/text number) from you....
WHEN you figure out that this is "what's going on"... it might ... (read in full...)
Did I make a mistake of turning down my arranged marriage?
Q. It was 2 years ago It was an arranged marriage proposal between families, I did not like or hate the guy but i was definitely not comfortable with the whole situation.After about six days or so he said something really cheap and vulgar over the ...
A. 14 November 2012: I note your use of the phrase "...thinking if we were really destined to marry, .."
You must admit that having OTHER PEOPLE determine who you will marry (an arranged marriage) is hardly "were really destined"...
Why not cool things for the t... (read in full...)
Problems with our sex life, does he need help or is it me with the problem?
Q. hi, i have been married now 12 years, with the same guy for 15 years. our sex life is very difficult, i have a higher sex drive than his, and am never sure if he really wants sexs, he does but its very quick and very one sided, a few kisses, a blow ...
A. 14 November 2012: I suggest that you print out a copy of this submittal.... and, sometime when you and he are relaxing (NOT just before bed-time), you show it to him and say, "Hunchie-bunchie, I wrote this, and now think it's best if YOU see it... and you and me can ... (read in full...)
Did I do the right thing by walking away when my fiance was staring at a woman? He didn't try to find me.
Q. My fiance stares a lot at women in front of me. I've talked to him about it, but to no avail. His staring can get blatant, up and down looks, looking at their rear. No matter where we go, he looks or tries to sneak a peek in. I see it all even if ...
A. 13 November 2012: "Sounds" to me like your fiance is quite a dog.... and you are walking in to a tumultous - and risky - marriage... You're spoken to him about this (staring at others), and he STILL does it?
It's one thing to have a casual glance... quite an... (read in full...)
Is it possible for your hymen to be broken and you are still a virgin?
Q. I am very stubborn… I finally went out with the guy and we spent a day together... I still footed half the bill… but I think I lost my virginity… I still feel as one tho… His did not penetrate me… I did not allow him but I saw blood on the bed and ...
A. 13 November 2012: While an intact hymen - and the resultant bleeding upon being "deflowered" - is a charming (though outdated) notion.... it is NOT exclusively so.
Many young woman will tear their hymen during regular activities or exercises... horseback riding a... (read in full...)
Is it possible for your hymen to be broken and you are still a virgin?
Q. I am very stubborn… I finally went out with the guy and we spent a day together... I still footed half the bill… but I think I lost my virginity… I still feel as one tho… His did not penetrate me… I did not allow him but I saw blood on the bed and ...
A. 13 November 2012: While an intact hymen - and the resultant bleeding upon being "deflowered" - is a charming (though outdated) notion.... it is NOT exclusively so.
Many young woman will tear their hymen during regular activities or exercises... horseback riding a... (read in full...)
How do people who live together keep the passion and desire alive?
Q. hey, i'd like advice on how to preserve longing and desire in a longterm relationship when you move in together, please? My bf of 2 years and I are very happy together and very passionate:) He wants us to move in together and the thing holding me ...
A. 13 November 2012: Count me amongst those who believe that there is no magic in living together.... unless, perhaps, two people are married and making a "home." For singles, it is a minefield, as you have learned.
For men, "living together" is that arrangem... (read in full...)
Masturbation Question
Q. Can i marstabate whilst on a period?...
A. 13 November 2012: Give it a try and report back to us........ (read in full...)
He says everything is fine so why is he ignoring me?
Q. My friend and I had a little argument. Now, although he says that everything is fine, he won't talk to me! He is ignoring my messages. I don't know what else to do. I have written him so many apologies and given him honest, heartfelt apologies on ...
A. 12 November 2012: Stop throwing yourself at this guy and recognize the situation for what it is. I.E.... HE isn't much interested in YOU ..... so you'll be better off to just FORGET him and get on with your life....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
He keeps our relationship a secret. Is he ashamed of me?
Q. I'm in a residential college and I have known this guy for 2 years, so when we moved into the college sparks started and now we're seeing eachother The problem is that from the start he's told me he's been hurt in the past, and that he will nev...
A. 12 November 2012: Great "choice" he gives you. May I re-state it: "Either you be my whore, or I'll see to it that your life is a desert for the next year."
Is that REALLY the kind of message you'd expect to get from a guy who "loves" you?????
STOP putting ... (read in full...)
Sleeping with my friend who I want a relationship with, but he is not being honest with me about what he wants!
Q. Ok my question I have is about a guy who has become a great friend in my life over the past 4 months. About a couple of weeks ago we slept together and I was ok with it. Than it happened again. I have realized in the meantime that I would sometime ...
A. 12 November 2012: OP: He's USING YOU for his se*ual pleasures.... and it "sounds" like you are letting him, based on your vaporous belief that he really gives a darn about you....
Special note: For the most part, guys DON'T "give a darn about" girls who are will... (read in full...)
Out of curiosity, how do you react when you kiss someone new?
Q. For all of you out there who are single and are always in and out of relationships, how do you react when you get kissed by someone new for the first time. Y'see I'm meeting up with some guy tonight and I'm hoping it ends with a kiss, but it's been ...
A. 12 November 2012: There are a handful of details which determine how I feel about kissing someone new. They are:
1. Is it a boy or a girl that I am kissing?,
2. Where are we? If we are in my room it's 'way difference from kissing on the dock where we go... (read in full...)
I am getting fed up with my boyfriends ex wife
Q. I am getting fed up with my boyfriends ex wife. She is too dependent on him for jobs and advice and see`s him as her best friend. Yes, granted, I think if there was any chance of getting him back she wouldnt waste a moment. I have told him my ...
A. 12 November 2012: Nothing good can come from ANY CONTACT by you, with her...
This needs to be between YOU and your B/F.... and, it is B/F who needs to learn how to assure that your's and his relationship is not impeded by his ex-.
Does your B/F have a spine? I... (read in full...)
Do guys really prefer girls with long hair?
Q. do guys really prefer girls with long hair? I have really long dark hair down to my waist, but most the time I leave it naturally curly/wavy because it looks nicer and has more texture. But the amount of guys who mention my hair on a night out is ...
A. 12 November 2012: Once the lights go out and the clothes come off... guys don't really notice if a girl even HAS HAIR!!!!! (... on her cranium!!!)..
Good luck........ (read in full...)
Watching Pornography in a relationship. Is it unfair or fun?
Q. Hi, i want to ask this question and i want your opinions. I hate my boyfriends watching porn when they are having a relationship with me, what i wanted to know was is there such thing as a man who is not that fussed by it? Who would just take it or ...
A. 12 November 2012: I've detected the KEY PHRASE in your submittal. It is:
"... I hate my boyfriendS watching porn when they are having a relationship with me.... " Note that I have capitalized the "S" in "boyfriendS"....
Now, please reveal.... how serious are ... (read in full...)
Watching Pornography in a relationship. Is it unfair or fun?
Q. Hi, i want to ask this question and i want your opinions. I hate my boyfriends watching porn when they are having a relationship with me, what i wanted to know was is there such thing as a man who is not that fussed by it? Who would just take it or ...
A. 12 November 2012: I've detected the KEY PHRASE in your submittal. It I:
"... I hate my boyfriendS watching porn when they are having a relationship with me.... " Note that I have capitalized the "S" in "boyfriendS"....
Now, please reveal.... how serious are ... (read in full...)
His comment has damaged my self esteem. What should I do now?
Q. Basically, my crush called me ugly indirectly a few days back. He did indeed mention that he was joking, however, this is not the first time something like this has happened. It really crushed my self esteem, especially since they were talking about ...
A. 12 November 2012: ANY GUY who would say to his G/F that she is "ugly"... is a flaming, flagrant, and worthless AS*HOLE....
So.... for you, the question is: What could you possibly want to do with an AS*HOLE as a boyfriend?????
I think I know the answer.... a... (read in full...)
Boyfriend going through existential crisis. How Can I Help him & Our Relationship?
Q. I don't know where to begin...well my boyfriend and I have been together for just over 2 years. Everything has been amazing, he's everything I've ever wanted in a guy and so much more. We have talked about a future together, getting married, kids, ...
A. 12 November 2012: From the "sound" of your submittal, I'd say that you are successfully approaching adulthood....and your B/F is struggling with puberty....
Theres's nothing WRONG with such a struggle.... However, if you want the relationship between the two of y... (read in full...)
My friend changed so much and he blames it on me!
Q. Two and a half years ago, I met a guy through a mutual friend. He and I became good friends. A few months later, we ended up having a few dates and a few kisses over the period of about a month. This time was wonderful: he would turn up with 50 ...
A. 12 November 2012: He asked you to be a "friend with benefits???" I believe that is shorthand for "whore." (Though it's really not shorter, is it?....)
Anyhow.... you've now seen this "new" version of that "old" guy who you liked so much... And the "New" version ... (read in full...)
Have you any old scars to heal from bad relationships?
Q. I was wondering, has anyone ever being in a relationship like this? I wonder because I was in a 2 year relationship, this was my first long term relationship, I was with an older men, I was 19 he was 35 and for the lack of understanding I didn’t k...
A. 12 November 2012: There's no mistaking that this first - much older - man who you described has had a terrible .... and long-lasting ...impact upon you.. AND, you are wise to see just how it came to pass, and the negative impact it has had on all aspects of your ... (read in full...)
I think he wants more than my friendship...
Q. I have recently become friends with this guy. We clicked instantly. It was great! But then he started becoming a real flirt. So I figured ok whatever he'll get the message that I'm not interested. Then he started becoming really touchy feely and I ...
A. 12 November 2012: Did you ever study math in that scheme which uses "sets"?
I think that "lovers" is a subset of "friends".... so - based on that - what's wrong with just leaving "friends" as the subset in which you and this guy stay.... and IF you and he go in to... (read in full...)
I know its not meant to be for so many reasons so how do I forget him?
Q. Hi. I'm in love with one of my guy friends for a few months now and i know it's not good. I think maybe he loves me too, because sometimes it feels like that and we can really have great times, but it just isn't right. Still i become so much j...
A. 12 November 2012: There is really a lot of detail missing from your submittal....and it makes me ask this question, of you:
IF you and this guy cannot be lovers, why can't you be "just friends?" IF you and he travel in the same circle, and - consequently - have m... (read in full...)
My girlfriend broke up with me for interfering with her job
Q. Hi There, I wanted to get your advice about a bad breakup I’m currently going through. I started dating my co-worker after I resigned from the company. Even before I resigned her work schedule bothered me. Our manager would call, text, and IM her...
A. 12 November 2012: Rich: Your foray in to this girl's life was - or, at least, BECAME - inappropriate.... and you went over the edge of what she would tolerate... so she decided to let you go....
NOW, you really need to "let go" of her, and get on with your lif... (read in full...)
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