My bf wants pics of me should I send them?
Q. Hi Recently my bf asked me to send pics of myself in underwear I love him and trust him and I want to do it... its not I don't feel comfortable with it and he said if I don't want to do it its fine but I don't want him thinking I am some kind...
A. 11 December 2012: Let me be more perfectly clear about this:
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO....Don't send him any compromising pictures of you. Don't give him a photo copy... DO NOT reveal your intimate self to this guy...
WHAT do we have to say to get yo... (read in full...)
Scared I'll miss him if we break-up. But I feel neglected and second best. Any advice on how to manage this situation?
Q. I think I should leave my boyfriend of 3 years but I'm scared to because I know I'm going to miss him so much. Can anyone give me some advice on whether this is normal or if it means I shouldn't do it? Here is some background on the reasons I have ...
A. 9 December 2012: Didn't you post this previously? ....and not too long ago?
The "answer" is; you have to choose from between two alternatives:
1. Continue to be this guy's foot-wiping mat for the indefinite future (until you, finally, get fed up), or,
2. ... (read in full...)
I'm worried for my sister who's involved with a known cheater.Can cheaters ever change?
Q. Can cheaters really change? I ask because my sister has started going out with a guy I know from uni who has cheated on all of his past girlfriends and I am a bit worried. He was always quite open about his cheating with his friends (they were all ...
A. 9 December 2012: 1. Cheaters DON'T commonly change....
2. I recommend that you stay out of your Sister's affairs EXCEPT to take her aside, some time soon, and say to her: "Sis, I love you and don't ever want to see you get hurt. That said, I DO want to say t... (read in full...)
What can you suggest? I'm faithful always, but I feel like she holding my sex life hostage.
Q. I'm 29 and my girlfriend is 27. We've been together for 5 years, lived together for 4. Our relationship is and has been going well in most respects. We rarely argue and suit each other nicely. Unfortunately we have fairly different sex drives...
A. 9 December 2012: Rather than give you my lengthy diatribe about sex and relationships.... I'll just give you the "Reader's Digest" version:
If two people who want to be in a relationship have vastly different sexual desires that relationship is DOOMED.
Sorry,
... (read in full...)
Office Romance, No Trust on Lover
Q. I am married and in relationship with a married lover (we love each other) since before she got married a year back. After her marriage we have had numerous problems and now situation is that I don't trust her anymore due to she took me too much for ...
A. 9 December 2012: I always get a kick out of it when two people WHO ARE CHEATING ON THEIR PARTNERS come on here with a question about TRUST!!!!!
Good luck........ (read in full...)
Am I setting myself up for being cheated on?
Q. Dear aunts and uncles, I've been in a relationship for almost two years now. And last night my boyfriend decided to open up and tell me I'm his 19th girlfriend. With his last girlfriend he said it wasn't working out so he cheated on her with a wo...
A. 9 December 2012: You write: " I feel like I dont know who he really is. "
Let me help you... This guy is a controlling creep (you gave the description, quite nicely, in your submittal)... who is quite a PLAYER (19 conquests??? Outstanding!!!!).. and you will do ... (read in full...)
Do most couples start having sex at 18?
Q. When couples turn 18 in highschool do they usually have sex? whether they already were or start to. ...
A. 9 December 2012: Are you asking the Aunts and Uncles to VALIDATE that you can - and SHOULD - start an active sex life in the next year or two???? Won't happen....... (read in full...)
Worried because my hookup count is building up...
Q. Hello all, It's been more than half a year since I got out of my first and only relationship that lasted a good 1.5 years. And since the end of that relationship, I've had a good handful of drunken hookups. I've had three one night stands alr...
A. 9 December 2012: You're not yet a "huge" slut.... but it looks like you know how to get there.....
How about.... when you go out and socialize, you ask yourself if, whatever you do, you could write it in a note to your MOTHER or FATHER the next day, and tell the... (read in full...)
My bf wants pics of me should I send them?
Q. Hi Recently my bf asked me to send pics of myself in underwear I love him and trust him and I want to do it... its not I don't feel comfortable with it and he said if I don't want to do it its fine but I don't want him thinking I am some kind...
A. 9 December 2012: You write: "....he said if I don't want to do it its fine but I don't want him thinking I am some kind of slag?"
What is he going to think of you if you DO send them????
Don't go along with his creepy request. Remember: Pics in cyber-sp... (read in full...)
I'm confused about how abrupt he became after sex. What could be his problem?
Q. Hi everyone, I have been feeling incredibly confused and feel that I need some advice before I can let this go.. Im 29 and the guy in question is 26.. we dated for only 3 weeks. He is quite an introvert and definitely not the player type. The...
A. 9 December 2012: You ask: "...which is the most likely truthful reason he ended it? ".... as if one of the two suggestions that you list applies. NEITHER DOES!!!!!
The "truthful" reason is that - contrary to what you wrote earlier - HE REALLY IS A PLAYER!!... (read in full...)
Is he genuine? Every time he's 'going to leave her' something comes up. How do get more strength to cope with him?
Q. First of all I know im an idiot for getting myself in this situation and I do regret it more than you could know which is why I could do with some advice. I had feelings for a guy that I've known for a year and stupidly let him kiss me a few mo...
A. 9 December 2012: Here's what you do:
1. Put on your "big girl" panties,
2. Puff out your chest,
3. Say to yourself: "There is NO WAY that ANY MAN is worth this anguish.... especially one who is a lying cheat."
You may have to repeat this regime more ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend pressured me to throw out all things from my past but she lied and didn't do the same!
Q. After 6 months I bowed to constant pressure and threw away all my old photos, holiday photos the lot (except the ones of my son). My girlfriend was adamant that they belonged in the past, was nothing to do with "us" and told me she had thrown all ...
A. 9 December 2012: What a sorry set of circumstances. I'm so sorry to hear that you have agreed to, effectively, destroy all that you held (what "was) of your past..... and THEN to learn that SHE didn't do the same..... i.e. The very premise upon which you kept YOUR ... (read in full...)
Do you think moving in together without an engagement is a good idea?
Q. I wanted to get your take on being engaged before moving in together. I've been with my significant other (SO) for almost 4 years. I am 24, just finishing up my last year of University. He is 28, finished college two years ago and is still str...
A. 9 December 2012: It's got a 50/50 chance of proving to be a good idea.....
What's more salient... is that the DOWNSIDE (that 50%) is VERY difficult to correct (one of you must depart).... whilest the UPSIDE (the other 50%) is very pleasant and enticing.
THAT... (read in full...)
Why is she like this? What is wrong with my sister?
Q. Hi all well I have something on my mind and heart it's my sister we are always at each other's throats . But it's not me I don't argue with her I just let her talk to a certain extent. The problem is my mom is sick and she made me her Power of Att...
A. 9 December 2012: The situation, as I understand it... is that your Mom lives with you... and you have her Power of Attorney... and you and your Sister don't get along....
What's the question? Do you need lessons in how to ignore your Sister? Be polite and cord... (read in full...)
I know I'm going to break up with him. But am I right to wait until after Christmas? Should I return his Christmas presents after we break up?
Q. Something has snapped in me this week and I have finally decided, after a lot of heartache, that I want to break up with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is no longer making any effort with me, and despite me bringing it up several times and him prom...
A. 9 December 2012: Do it now, so's he can have the &200 to pay for his lodging whilest his folks are away!!!...
Good luck....... (read in full...)
I am confused by his response! Does he still love me?
Q. I am having a dilemma right now. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 .5 years now, I love him and I believe he loves me too. We are both currently not working, and struggling financially. He is 24 years old, and I am 22. I just got offered a...
A. 8 December 2012: He flattered you when he said that he trusted you to stay with this friend/third party.... and YOU want to look this gift horse in the mouth???????
Stop with so much unnecessary over-thinking.... and count your blessings that you are hanging ... (read in full...)
How can I stop being hurt by the break-up with my husband when he was never good for me in the first place?
Q. How can I stop being hurt by my husband when he was never good for me and over the idea of getting back together with him for our child's sake? Been married 6 years, currently separated (2nd time) and have a two year old son. Lots of bad stuff hap...
A. 8 December 2012: Don't do ANYTHING "for the sake of the child" (children).
THAT is a major justification for staying in a lousy marriage/household.... or, for trying to re-constitute a marriage that is DEAD (as you are considering).....
Believe me.... kids are ... (read in full...)
Why am I so hesitant about having sex with this man? What could be holding me back?
Q. I met this man on an online dating site. The first time we went out he scared me be the way he was over excited to see me. He literally ran towards me to hug me I felt so frightened that I automatically put my hands up. We had talked on the ph...
A. 8 December 2012: You write: "The question is why can't I have sex with him what is it holding me back? ..."
Your answers are:
1. You can't have sex with him because your good sense keeps stepping in and reminds you that you DON'T WANT TO (have sex) BECAU... (read in full...)
Can I fix my marriage? If the answer is "yes", then what should I do?
Q. my wife and i are at the end of our marriage, I think. I made mistakes. When I was dating her i was also dating another. I proposed to her with hickies from another woman on me. While married i felt feelings for her sister for 2 weeks and just r...
A. 8 December 2012: Perhaps the two of you could just take a casual "break" for a couple of years... and, during those years, perhaps ONE OF YOU will grow in to adulthood...
If that happens, then the new adult can be put in-charge of your "relatio... (read in full...)
I'm getting feelings for my married friend. Is she into me as well?
Q. Ok first off I'm a single guy and this is something that just happened I didn't plan it. I have a married female friend I have recently reunited with, a few weeks ago she came to see me at my house to watch our favorite shows. She's always told me ...
A. 7 December 2012: WHY put yourself in to the middle of a triangle, REGARDLESS of how this woman feels about you???????... (read in full...)
Did he really love me if he got another girl pregnant?
Q. i had a boyfriend for 8 years. while together he got another girl pregnant who is his classmate. did he really love me? he said it was all accident and did not love the girl. added he will just give the girl's request to get them married and later ...
A. 7 December 2012: I've always wondered about how one makes a woman pregnant "by accident"????
I can't help but imagine a man with his penis exposed, saying to his obviously-pregnant girl: "Honest, I was just cleaning it and it went off!!!!"
You'll be bet... (read in full...)
Would it be so wrong if my wife's (we're separated) sister in law and I get together once in a while to enjoy sex as friends?
Q. I'm separated, my wife's brother separated from his wife. At this point neither 1 of us have any faith in our liars, cheaters and drunks and have no plans to go back. We are both sexually attracted, but we don't want to wind up in a relationship ...
A. 7 December 2012: To put matters in perspective.... why don't you and your
S-i-l plan to have this intimacy during a picnic? Plan to take that picnic in a romantic glen - say, in Vietnam, or Cambodia or Kosovo - where you know there are landmines unde... (read in full...)
How do I move on from a relationship that has totally consumed me?
Q. Okay, this is sort of a long story but to make it sort of short the important details are that I'm in my mid-20s (my ex boyfriend is 29), both our Mom's are/were suffering from advanced stage cancer but mine recently passed away, and we've been ...
A. 7 December 2012: Make a list of things that you LIKE about you and him and your relationship..... and a second list of things that you DON'T LIKE about you and him and your relationship.
Compare those lists.... and if one overwhelms the other, then you have an ... (read in full...)
Help me settle our artistic differences!
Q. Hey DearCupid! I don't know if it's a problem as such, more a question of tact. My partner and I are quite musical but the trouble is we have two different specialities - his is folk and mine is classical. He strums, and I sing. We formed a two-...
A. 7 December 2012:
Suppose that HE was a wizard of an automobile mechanic, and YOU struggled putting gasoline in your car at a self-service filling station. Would you and he have any trouble figuring out how to handle that?
If "yes," then apply the same reasoni... (read in full...)
How can I possibly break up with him and start to move on?
Q. I started dating my boyfriend July of last year. For the last 5 months we've been on-and-off. I'll start with saying that he is the only person I've ever met that I've been able to be my 100% self around. I do love him and I love how silly and open ...
A. 7 December 2012: You write: "...he's the only person I've met in which I've gotten along with so perfectly..."
BUT, most of your submittal is a saga of drama and angst between the two of you. Is THAT really how things are between two people who "get along so... (read in full...)
My husband has ED, no sex drive, and is completely none affectionate with me.
Q. My husband is completely none affectionate with me, and I dont know what to try anymore. He is impotent from undiagnosable causes. I mean not the GP, or the psychologist could really figure it out what is his issue,but he lost all his sexual ...
A. 7 December 2012: Been there; done that....
When two people are trying to make a relationship.... and they find, either early-on, or sometime later, that they have a sex/intimacy mismatch, it can be SO difficult to acknowledge it and determine how to react to it...... (read in full...)
How do users and abusers live with themselves?
Q. Dear Cupid I have a generic question, the abusive boy friends or the ones who use people for their purpose and throw them away like dirt, how do they live with themselves, knowing that they hurt several people. I have a bf I believe soon to ...
A. 7 December 2012: I'm sure it's little consolation for you to learn that those who use and abuse others march to an entirely different drummer and beat.....
You've mentioned his belief in God.... but must admit that, if it's the "God" that many of us understa... (read in full...)
I need some help in writing a love message In my gf birthday card.
Q. I need some help in writing a love message In my gf birthday card. We have been together for nearly a year and it's serious. This is her first birthday together with me. So I would like to write a special message, or have some tips. Something's ...
A. 7 December 2012:
When I sent my current SO her first birthday card - about 6 months after we'd started dating - I wrote:
"Since I've been seeing you, my life hasn't been NEARLY as crappy as it used to be....."
She was impressed. You may "borrow" that te... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants space so she can find out if she is happy
Q. I am 22 years old,I have been dating my girlfriend for 6 months now.last night she told me that she isn't sure if she can be happy and I deserve someone who is 100% committed to me.she said she wants to take a 2 week break so she can hopefully find ...
A. 6 December 2012: I say, give her the two weeks she requested.... see what happens at the end.... and consider if you and she will return to one-another and resume what you had yesterday..
HOWEVER, steel yourself that her plaint about needing this time to "... fin... (read in full...)
My partner said I ruined his life!
Q. Hi, I feel terrible and ill because my partner has basically said i have ruined his life. We got together a few years ago in uni and had been saving for ages to get a house together. due to him being a little hot and cold (loved me but didnt...
A. 6 December 2012: Children are often/usually identified by their need to find aomeone/anyone else to be "to blame" for their woes in life....
Your "partner" sounds like just such a child.
I suggest that you let his whining "run off your back." He's got proble... (read in full...)
"I love her as much as I could" What does that mean?
Q. What does it mean when a man says "I loved her as much as I could.?" I ask, because, an associate of mine cited that he cheated and left an ex girlfriend over twenty something years ago, but he claims that while she "loved him more than he loved ...
A. 6 December 2012: My G/F and I have a schtick that we practice....
She says; "I love you"... .. and I say, "I love you more".... and she sez: "I love you the most".... and I say, "I love you moster"......
It seems harmless......
P.S. Almost without ... (read in full...)
Why did she keep cheating on me and treating me so badly?
Q. I'm recently out of a 4 year relationship and a traumatic one at that. The problems began 2 1/2 years ago when she started cheating on me..the other guy was a random she met on craigslist one night when i was not around. Their fling lasted on ...
A. 6 December 2012: Welll.... your last paragraph indicates that you have at least SOME why you are being a foot-wipe mat for this girl....
NOW, convert THAT.... get a spinal implant.... and see if you can continue in your life as a male homo sapien.....
Good lu... (read in full...)
I asked my ex girlfriend if she's dating someone else. What does her answer mean?
Q. I asked my ex girlfriend if she is dating someone and her answer was "I'm not going to answer that". I've been told that she means it is none of mine business. But is she still interested in me?...
A. 6 December 2012: What difference does it make??????... (read in full...)
Questions about glasses and contacts
Q. hi, im annoyed with glasses, in gym i when i get hit in the face with a ball my nose gets dented and hurts because of my glasses, i could take them off but i get a headace after a while. Everyone says i look really pretty without glasses, and that ...
A. 6 December 2012: Just remember this:
Men never make passes at girls who wear glasses..... BUT..
.... contact lenses catch more menses!!!!!
Good luck........ (read in full...)
Female Boss Sending Flirty Winkies Boils Over Into Sexual Harassment?
Q. Female board member flirty texts my husband numerous times per day w/ lots of ;)winky smiles, etc. She constantly leans in and whispers in his ear in public and even takes my seat when I get up. I think she follows school events and knows where to ...
A. 6 December 2012: Where's HUBBY in all this??????? He holds the key....
Good luck (you'll need it....)... (read in full...)
How can I keep from having certain natural "reactions" while sleeping in the same bed with a really cute guy?
Q. Hi all! I've started seeing this really amazing guy. We've been out for a few weeks now and he's invited me to spend the night at his place, in his bed. We have both agreed that nothing is going to happe, that we are just going to cuddle and kiss. ...
A. 5 December 2012: SVC: It's a good thing that you were with current hubby ... 'cuz, if'n you were here, with me, bra and panties notwithstanding... I don't think I/we could have resisted "testing the waters" if you and I were between the same sheets, that ... (read in full...)
What's the difference between sexual attraction and love?
Q. Hi, Anybody out there that can tell me What the difference is between sexual attraction And love? And doesn't it go hand in hand? Thanks...
A. 5 December 2012: OP: How about you stop this "beating around the bush" and post your REAL question, either in this or in another, new submittal??????... (read in full...)
How can I keep from having certain natural "reactions" while sleeping in the same bed with a really cute guy?
Q. Hi all! I've started seeing this really amazing guy. We've been out for a few weeks now and he's invited me to spend the night at his place, in his bed. We have both agreed that nothing is going to happe, that we are just going to cuddle and kiss. ...
A. 5 December 2012: If you were my Sister, I'd point out that those "natural reactions" come about when two people who are hormone-driven are together, after dark, in the same bed..... AND, the only hope to avoid those "natural reactions" and the "likely activity" ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my mistress, but can't divorce my wife.
Q. Hi all. I just registered to this forum after googling to see if I'm alone. I am in the same situation as many of you and I'm completely devastated. I have been married for six years and have two wonderful kids with my wife. over the past six yea...
A. 5 December 2012: I believe that you've successfully morphed in to a member of the Mark Sanford "I've met my REAL soul-mate and will do anything - without limits - to scuttle my marriage to see her" club.
You really DO know the answer to your "questio... (read in full...)
Is he a player if he's busy on the weekend?
Q. Hi, I just met a lovely guy, he's South American and seems like the perfect guy. He's sweet, attentive, funny, complimentary etc. We met only 3 days ago and slept together on the first night - there was so much chemistry and we were both pretty ...
A. 5 December 2012: Sarah; For both men and women, there is a spectrum of sexual desires, preferences and expectations.... from "flagrant whore" on one end, to "won't even acknowledge having genitalia until married" on the other...
It's my understanding that LOT... (read in full...)
What is the key to being single and happy?
Q. I am a 24 year old female. I have a good head on my shoulders, I'm career oriented, and for the most part, lead a very balanced and fairly busy life. But ever since I started dating in high school, I've noticed that I've never really been happy when ...
A. 4 December 2012: One way to get a great view on being happy whilest being single, is to come on this site and read about all the B/S that so many of your contemporaries endure when/while/as they try to make a relationship with one of us guys!!!!
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Why did she want me back, only to end up on the dating sites again?
Q. I had lost count on how many times I had found my girlfriend on dating sites and chat rooms that focus on flrting. She either lied to me about being on them or played it down to them just being harmless internet friends and me being jealous. I ended ...
A. 4 December 2012: You write: "...Why did she want me back just to end up like this again? ..."
The short answer is: "because she could.." (YOU let her get away with it!!!)
Hope your next girlfriend is much nicer and more loyal....... (read in full...)
What's the difference between sexual attraction and love?
Q. Hi, Anybody out there that can tell me What the difference is between sexual attraction And love? And doesn't it go hand in hand? Thanks...
A. 30 November 2012: One of life's ironies is that WOMEN think that it DOES "go hand-in-hand"...... but, MEN think that there is little or no relation between the two concepts.....
Figure that out and you'll be much better prepared to spend time with (and have a "... (read in full...)
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