A
female
age
51-59,
*esley
writes:hi, i have been married now 12 years, with the same guy for 15 years. our sex life is very difficult, i have a higher sex drive than his, and am never sure if he really wants sexs, he does but its very quick and very one sided, a few kisses, a blow job for him, and then a sandwich(thats no joke). I would love to be more adventurous and just dont get why he does'nt, he hardly ever gives me encouragement, i never know whether he is enjoying it, when its real sex, he takes for ever to come. So is it me with a problem, do i need help, or does he? I am quite attractive, still have areasonable figure, have great boobs, and as a rule am a giver, but it would be nice to get, with out having to ask. Answers please...
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male
reader, eddie85  +, writes (14 November 2012):
 At your age, assuming your husband is roughly the same age as you, have their sex drive decline. Also, with the length of your marriage, I am sure many aspects of your sex life are routine.
To spice things up, though, you'll likely need to take matters into your own hands. Here are some of my suggestions:
1) Seduce him. Surprise him with a special evening. Wear something he likes, smell nice, light some candles, etc. If he senses the night is going to be special, he will act accordingly. If you sense he is rushing things, tell him you want to enjoy it and extend foreplay.
2) Have a "sexcation". Go out of town and rent a motel room with the explicit reason of having a night on your own. Maybe get a jacuzzi-suite ... but so long as you and him are the sole focus for the evening.
3) Tell him that you need to be satisfied and that you know he's the man who can do the job. Sometimes a little sultry, verbal encouragement can work wonders.
4) Recall times with him where you guys got a little crazy before you got married. Sometimes recalling those dalliances from ages ago will generate the question "do you wanna try and do that again?"
Hopefully one of these tactics will work. Just don't expect your husband to read your mind though and if something doesn't work, try another tactic. You definitely have the power in this matter.
Good luck.
Eddie
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (14 November 2012):
 I suggest that you print out a copy of this submittal.... and, sometime when you and he are relaxing (NOT just before bed-time), you show it to him and say, "Hunchie-bunchie, I wrote this, and now think it's best if YOU see it... and you and me can discuss what happens between us in the bedroom.... and you can learn that - as far as I am concerned - things are all hunky-punky when we want to get down to it. Do you suppose we might consider just what each of us "gets" from our romantic and intimate times?... and you can recognize that I am not fully saturated and excited about things.... and, perhaps, we could find ways to do things... and maybe some NEW things... that would allow me to crumble up and burn this note?"
Should work...
Good luck....
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