A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear aunts and uncles,I've been in a relationship for almost two years now. And last night my boyfriend decided to open up and tell me I'm his 19th girlfriend. With his last girlfriend he said it wasn't working out so he cheated on her with a woman of a different race (this is seen as unacceptable in our culture, narrow minded I know, but that is not the issue). So he told me this woman he cheated with was purely for sex. Now during our relationship he has been very paranoid of me cheating to the point where I shut down my Facebook. From the beginning He's insisted he tries to stay away from a 'sinful life' and wants me to be the same. I agreed and even though I was never very outgoing I even stopped talking to make friends. now I find this out. I feel like I dont know who he really is. I love him a lot but things have definitely changed. Is it worth me forgetting his past or am I setting myself up for a case of history repeating itself?
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female
reader, me.riya  +, writes (10 December 2012):
better to forget about him. I know its really tough, but same thing was happened with me too. I was betrayed three times, whenever I trusted somebody he betrayed with me. so never trust anybody, live ur life alone. enjoy with friends, listen to rocking songs Never be upset dear.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (9 December 2012):
 You write: " I feel like I dont know who he really is. "
Let me help you... This guy is a controlling creep (you gave the description, quite nicely, in your submittal)... who is quite a PLAYER (19 conquests??? Outstanding!!!!).. and you will do yourself a favor by putting LOTS of space between you and him.....
Good luck.....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2012): Probably most concerning about your story is that you say he's the one who has done things in the past that might cause you not to trust him, but he's actually treating you as if you're the one who's not to be trusted.It's classic manipulative behaviour - he's putting pressure on you to do the things that you have (shutting down Facebook, not going out etc) to remove your frame of reference, so you can't get a reality check from other people to confirm that what he's making you do is unacceptable. You haven't done anything wrong, so don't allow him to make you feel either that you have, or that unless you do these things that you will.In my experience people like this don't change - if you don't do what he expects he'll either end the relationship or cheat, but will never try to alter his behaviour because he's never had to answer to anyone. You do need to get away I'm afraid.
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