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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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New girl wants my relationship status on facebook to change but I don't want to hurt my ex!
Q. Hi, I'm unsure what to do. I've started seeing a girl, and straight away she wants me to change my relationship status on Facebook to "In A Relationship". Now, before you believe that THAT is my problem then please let me continue! Over t...
A. 1 October 2009: Dude, it's Facebook! I sometimes cannot believe the controversy and drama that this stupid site creates. She's your ex, who cares what she and her dumb friends think? I don't think you owe her an apology for moving on with your life. If they are ... (read in full...)
Am I being stood up? Or are the texts really not going through?
Q. First off, thank you all who take the time to read and respond to my question. I really appreciate it. Ok, so my ex-girlfriend and I have been split for about 3 weeks. She initiated the breakup so I agreed and went my separate way for about a week...
A. 1 October 2009: I would suspect yes. If she agreed to meet with you at a certain time, she would see a missed call from you, all while knowing that she has been "missing" text messages--it would make sense for her to call you back or at least text you!
So if... (read in full...)
Is he in love with me or a pedophile?
Q. He is always talking to me at least more than 20 comments a day. He's a couple years older than me though. I know this isn't safe, but I met him online. Well anyways, each time we have a conversation, he'll be talking about how he wants to see me in ...
A. 1 October 2009: If you're at least 18 like it says you are...then no he's probably not a pedophile...... (read in full...)
I regret the name I gave my baby! What can I do now?
Q. Dear all, I have a problem that is in my head! I know many of you wouldnt think its such a big issue but i just delivered my baby girl on july 14th and called her a name i really liked at the time.. and we agreed on... on the 6th day he went to r...
A. 30 September 2009: Yes, it would help if you said what her name is...it may not even be as bad as you think it is. Just because that's her given name, it doesn't necessarily mean you have to call her that. I've known other people (but I don't know the past behind ... (read in full...)
Is this a sign I should just let him go?
Q. My Boyfriend of almost 4 years told me yesterday that he needs a break because he has not slept with any other girl. He said if I don't want to wait than we can break up. I don't know what to do. I know he loves me more than anything else and on ...
A. 30 September 2009: Let him go! What do you plan on doing on a break? Downing a pint upon pint of ben & jerry's, drinking yourself into a misery, all while watching romantic movies while he goes out and bangs other chicks? He really doesn't care that much if he's ... (read in full...)
How can I help my boyfriend get better at oral sex?
Q. So my boyfriend needs help giving oral sex. He's got the right attitude and loves doing it, but to be honest he's not very good at it. The thing is I've never had it done well so I have no idea what to tell him. Can some people give things to do ...
A. 29 September 2009: Some things will feel good to others that may not feel as good to some. It has to be based on what you like. So you have to be encouraging about it. If he just for a second does something you like tell him, "Can you do that again but longer, ... (read in full...)
She tickled my palm..what does that mean?
Q. IM 18 and this girl i like told me she like me very much and today while we were sitting in the car she tickled the palm of my hand i want to know what you think she want from me...
A. 29 September 2009: Tickling your palm wouldn't mean anything besides that she was flirting with you. ... (read in full...)
Is she too aggressive? Or should I just take her out anyways?
Q. I went on one date with a girl and it went pretty well. Afterwards she texted me and asked if I wanted another date. I said sure, she said where? I couldn't think of any good ideas so I put off texting her. Then I got distracted and then I forgot. ...
A. 28 September 2009: Yeah, she's kind of proving that she jumps the gun way too fast. She's obviously emotional and sounds like she's probably drama. I mean honestly, what do you need to prove to her? She waited 2-days and then started verbally attacking you. Tell ... (read in full...)
New girl wants my relationship status on facebook to change but I don't want to hurt my ex!
Q. Hi, I'm unsure what to do. I've started seeing a girl, and straight away she wants me to change my relationship status on Facebook to "In A Relationship". Now, before you believe that THAT is my problem then please let me continue! Over t...
A. 28 September 2009: Yes, you are considering your ex more than your new girlfriend. If you were over your ex, then you wouldn't worry about hurting her feelings. Your ex will just have to get over it. You're worrying too much about making everyone happy--make the ... (read in full...)
It bothers me that my g/f slept with someone she didn't even know
Q. My girlfriend slept with a lead singer from a band. It bothers me everyday that I know this. She said she did it because at the time she was mad at her old boyfriend. It just makes me so sad that she would lower herself like this to someone...
A. 28 September 2009: I'm sorry, but get a grip. That's why it's usually best for couples to not reveal who, what, where, when, and how they slept with people in the past. It's in the past, just because she slept with someone she didn't know doesn't define who she is. ... (read in full...)
Goint right into a relationship after ending a 3 year relationship with first love
Q. I don't know if i am over the man of my past relationship that just ended so abruptly, he is very bitter about it but we had so much because it was first love. Do you agree you will always be attached to your first love? When ever i am ...
A. 28 September 2009: You started dating someone DAYS after a breakup with someone you were together with for YEARS. Of course you're not going to be over him yet, your new guy is a rebound. And that's really not fair to your new guy if you can't me emotionally ... (read in full...)
Why is he ignoring me?
Q. I like this guy a lot. We had sex about a week ago which was my first time and now he's ignoring me. When I call he doesn't answer when I text he doesn't text back. If he does he says he's working. I really don't know since he use to do it before he ...
A. 28 September 2009: I mean the last time...... (read in full...)
Why is he ignoring me?
Q. I like this guy a lot. We had sex about a week ago which was my first time and now he's ignoring me. When I call he doesn't answer when I text he doesn't text back. If he does he says he's working. I really don't know since he use to do it before he ...
A. 28 September 2009: Yes, I also have to agree. He got what he wanted and now he's not interested. Just whatever you do, DO NOT call him or text him anymore...don't email him or anything else. You'll just be disappointed every time you try to communicate with him and ... (read in full...)
Should I wish my ex-girlfriend happy birthday?
Q. Hi this is Zahir Yousafzai from Pakistan. It’s been two months since I broke up with my GF. Her birth day is around the corner and im in a fixed whether to wish her birthday or not. if yes, then I would be more than obliged to hear from u guys that ...
A. 28 September 2009: Zahir,
Is this the same girl that you thought was cheating on you? If so, no, do not wish her a happy birthday. Remember that if someone doesn't respect you, why should you make them feel special?... (read in full...)
My ex was sick and I ignored him was that bad?
Q. My ex and I had just started being friendly after months of being bitter to each other after our break-up. The other day, I asked him thru text about the shop where he bought his car. Then he replied to explain a few things then said to me he is...
A. 28 September 2009: Well if you two are going to be "friendly" to one another, then it's probably best to stop B.S.-ing and playing silly games with one another. If my friend told me that they were sick (regardless if it's a guy or girl), as a friend to them, I would ... (read in full...)
I want a second date but don't want to be a stalker chick!
Q. I had one date with this guy - in early August. We played phone tag until Sept. 8. He'd leave me a voicemail, I'd call back and leave another voicemail. We just couldn't seem to connect. He used a company cell phone, then he quit his job. He must ...
A. 28 September 2009: Do you have any other way of contacting him...like email or social networking maybe? I don't really see the harm in trying to contact him again since you weren't able to connect because of the phone tag situation, so yes, he could have possibly ... (read in full...)
I forgot to tell him about my vow of abstinance!
Q. Im a too in love with my boyrfiend and Im 16 and have taken a vow of abstinance that I would love to uphold. The problem is I kinda forgot to tell him that 6 months ago and now Im about 80% sure he thinks he's gonna get to sleep with me and Im about ...
A. 27 September 2009: Don't be silly, you didn't "forget" to tell him, you just didn't tell him. First off, why would you break up with him because you "forgot" to tell him? Is it because you want to end it before he ends it first if you don't put out? If he likes ... (read in full...)
Is my BF ashamed of me? He won't hold my hand in public or tell his friends we're dating.
Q. My bf won't hold my hand in public! We have been together for two months and last night we went out to the store and I went to grab his hand and he 'acted' like he needed to grab something and let go of my hand. We held hands for less than 30 ...
A. 27 September 2009: I'm a little confused that you want to be with him, but you say that you deserve to be happy. He's not going to change. He was a jerk the first time you even went out with him! He really doesn't deserve you, you're too good for him. If he's rude ... (read in full...)
Do I ignore him or keep being mself?
Q. I like this man at my work.(plz NO comments on office romance) Things have been going good btwn us lots of flirting and talking getting to know eachother kinda deal.He did tell me hes totally single and from what ive heard he really isnt seeing ...
A. 26 September 2009: I would just ignore it for now. Guys also don't want to appear too eager, so he may add you eventually. Put yourself in his shoes...if he just gave you his email address would you go home immediately and add him? Probably not, for fear of ... (read in full...)
I have the perfect boyfriend, and instead I want Mr. Toothless! What do I do?
Q. I have been with my bf for just a little over a year. We have been doing the distance thing for about 7 months of it... he's a very attractive, kind person. The problem is, I've been hanging out with this much older guy lately. I mean - he's the ...
A. 26 September 2009: Your humor in this is cracking me up...sorry, I'll be serious. I definitely think that if you decide to go with your toothless construction worker friend, you'll regret it later on down the line. You know what you have--but is there something ... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about the text messages she's getting from this guy?
Q. Should I be concerned with flirtatious text messages that my wife gets from an old co-worker? My wife gets flirtatious text messages from someone she used to work with. This person left the company she is with about 12 months ago and they were fr...
A. 25 September 2009: Yes, you should be concerned with those messages. It's inappropriate for him to be sending her texts like that and it's also inappropriate for her to continue talking to him. Is your wife insecure? She may not be up to anything, but likes the ... (read in full...)
Is it common for a woman to go through a period of promiscuity/sexual experimentation?
Q. Is it common for a woman to go through a period of promiscuity/sexual experimentation in her young adult life. My girlfriend of six months told me she had been with 5 guys in six months her senior year of college. The last one she dated for 6 ye...
A. 25 September 2009: Yes, a lot of women including myself have gone through phases like that, especially after a long term relationship. Judging her on her past=no good, she told you in confidence, so you can't hold it against her. And maybe to even make you feel ... (read in full...)
Was my exgirlfriend cheating on me?
Q. Hi this is Zahir Yousafzai from Pakistan. I recently broke up with my girlfriend. My gut feeling always had this thought that she was cheating on me. She had a facebook account for almost one year but she disclosed this on me in the first week o...
A. 25 September 2009: Hey there. Sorry, I'm not taking the time to read the entire post...but just to put it in logical form, she's your EX-girlfriend. It's time to quit worrying about whether or not she WAS cheating on you. You are no longer together, so just look ... (read in full...)
He's 6 years older than me but I really have feelings for him, its an online romance
Q. Ok so basiclly i'm quite young and i live in another country to this other guy who is 20 and 6 years older than me and he isn't a perv or nothing due to the plain and simple fact i lied about my age i look older anyways and i'm more mature so when i ...
A. 25 September 2009: Ok, well you're not stupid, you're naive.
I'm guessing you haven't seen the commerical, but in the US they played a commerical about a girl that was around 14 years old and she's talking about how this older guy online and how he "underst... (read in full...)
Why was he so intensely into me only to drop me later?
Q. What is it with guys who come on so strong in the beginning, pursue you like crazy, get your hopes up so much and then just drop you like you never mattered at all? I met someone online and I seriously thought he had a lot of potential. The f...
A. 25 September 2009: That is a question that many of us women wonder, but there's guys that think that too. I wish I could give you an answer, I don't know what's going through his head--he could have been being honest and he didn't hear any sort of response from you ... (read in full...)
Guys: Is monogomy a myth?
Q. guys have you ever been completly faithful to a woman throughout your relationship-I'm starting to wonder whether faithful men are a myth,all my boyfreinds have cheated...
A. 25 September 2009: I'm not a guy, but I'm going to say 3/4 or them do...because I know for sure one did, I know for sure that one didn't, and the other two--I think they did. Of course, it's not an official scientific survey, but apparently I haven't been with the ... (read in full...)
We've broken up, but it's impossible to work things out with a zombie!
Q. Ok, so my boyfriend of almost a year broke up with me almost a month ago, saying it was him not me and that he wanted to still be friends. I was heartbroken, but I have been trying to move on. Anyway, I hadn't talked to him until he called me this ...
A. 25 September 2009: Well not necessarily. I've done the dumping and known others that have done the dumping, and it's not like they're out jumping for joy, except maybe sometimes--but a lot of the time the one doing the breaking up feels just as bad.
When people d... (read in full...)
We've broken up, but it's impossible to work things out with a zombie!
Q. Ok, so my boyfriend of almost a year broke up with me almost a month ago, saying it was him not me and that he wanted to still be friends. I was heartbroken, but I have been trying to move on. Anyway, I hadn't talked to him until he called me this ...
A. 25 September 2009: As far as advice goes, I think you're doing the right thing, so I don't have much for you besides just plain asking him. Just let him know that you're concerned since he doesn't seem to be acting or looking like himself. He probably won't give you ... (read in full...)
I thought telling would make it better, but it didn't!
Q. ok i had cheated on my bf a while ago and today just told him and he take it the way that i though he would. He hates me and i know it and i derseve it and and im a loser and cheater and i hate myself. he had ask me once and i told him i didnt...
A. 25 September 2009: Telling him the truth wasn't a big mistake, cheating on him was a big mistake. Take it as a lesson learned, cheating is bad and causes someone who loves you to hate you. My ex cheated on me--I do hate him and think he's disgusting, and would never ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants to date another woman to make sure that I am the "one"
Q. Hello! My boyfriend and I have been together for over four years and are now living together. Yesterday he opened up to me that he might want to date other people, to make sure I am the 'one.' By dating he means, take someone else out to dinner just ...
A. 24 September 2009: Please don't be this naive, your boyfriend is full of crap. So he wants you to wait around...be on the backburner while he gets to have have fun and see if you're "the one?" Give me a break, that is the biggest load of crap I've heard in a long ... (read in full...)
I want to break up for 3 months.
Q. I don't have the courage to tell my girlfriend that I want a break for 3 months. A good clean break up! I live with her and I still would pay half of all bills. Would writing a letter be a good idea? ...
A. 22 September 2009: No, writing a letter is not a good idea. If anything, it really pisses a woman off when a guy can't say what he feels to her face. Writing a letter would almost guarantee that she won't get back with you in 3-months, she'll think that you're a ... (read in full...)
I dated a girl in the past that she really hates so she broke up with me. How do I get her back?
Q. hi people really hope u can help me out. there's this girl i have been dating for 2 months and she was the only girl that i had ever felt this way about. I loved her with my all and she loves me too. She said i was the greatest and the best boyfrien...
A. 22 September 2009: I REALLY don't think you should do anything. What can you do? It seems to me that you've done what you could and she's being impossible. You didn't even do anything wrong. Were you supposed to be psychic and know that you would date the girl ... (read in full...)
How do I politely say, "I'm a moron!" ?
Q. I accidentally dialled a guy that I like. I don’t know how that happened. Seriously. I didn’t mean to go anywhere near his number. Seemingly his number was still on my call logs from weeks back (??!). The situation is awkward because he and I...
A. 22 September 2009: I think he wants you to call him back....and you should if you want to talk to him and just don't mention that you accidentally called him unless he asks.
I mean, if he says something like, "I'm glad you called me!" Don't say, "Yeah well it ... (read in full...)
Why is it so hard to get over someone...?
Q. Why is it hard to get over someone even though you know that there are so many better guys out there that are fighting for a chance to date you? I am just so confused!! I compare every guy to my ex, and even if the new guy seems to have every ...
A. 21 September 2009: No worries, you will not be alone forever. I think you kind of missed something important, which is: how long have you been broken up? Breakups take time...it's a grieving process. If you have to (and I've had to) is to just not date anyone at ... (read in full...)
Why does he think the piercing is trashy?
Q. There was a boy i realy liked and when i told hime i had my bellybutton pierced he said *wow thats trashy!" then he left! Why do you think he thinks its trashy?...
A. 21 September 2009: Well...boys aren't the smartest at flirting especially when they're teenagers. He could have been flirting and did it as a way to make you feel insecure, or if you were doing something like trying to show it off--he wasn't impressed and told you ... (read in full...)
How do you break up with a habitual cheater for good?
Q. I'm in desperate need of advice. My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. We have a 1 and a half year old son, and live together in a home that we own jointly. He has cheated on me countless times (I've caught him at least 25 tim...
A. 20 September 2009: Please do not worry about what hardships he has to go through: it's called Karma...and it's a bitch. He's cheated on you 25 times?!? Girl, him being left on the street with nothing and no friends will be everything that he DESERVES!
Let h... (read in full...)
I'm in a wonderful relationship that's lost its spark. He says he doesn't want to marry.
Q. I've been in a wonderful relationship for two yrs having been single for most of my life. I love him dearly and he is very loving in return however, he does not believe in marriage and I want to, I've always wanted to. At the moment I'm finding I'm ...
A. 20 September 2009: I know you love him and I believe you, but you have to realize that you two aren't on the same page as far as what you want in life. He doesn't believe in marriage and you do. It's not really fair to YOU if you stay with him simply to stay with ... (read in full...)
Can I leave my mom now, one month before I'm 18? She assaulted me!
Q. okay so I turn 18 in ONE month exactly, and I live in Texas. Well my mother knows this is the last month so she's doing everything possible to make it hell. She tells me even when im 18 Ill still do what she says and everything else and im not ...
A. 18 September 2009: I think that technically, yes she can have the cops bring you back home if you "run away." A month goes by quickly, just take it day-by-day and try not to talk to your mother about those issues to avoid any other arguments. Then when you're 18, ... (read in full...)
Since he lost his job, he's changed: alcohol, drugs, lying to me, avoiding me... should I stay with him?
Q. I am dating a man who in the past has been a very thoughtful, kind and decent person. He lost his job three months ago and since then, has been drinking heavily and taking narcotics to "numb the pain". He is exceptionally depressed and worried ...
A. 18 September 2009: Well, I know you want to be supportive and be there for him--but it may not be the best time right now. To be honest, I got laid off my job back in May, then my bf cheated on me, followed by several other circumstances that caused me to start ... (read in full...)
He was so rude on while texting me but was the opposite in person...
Q. Hi, i am just confused a bit..if anyone can help. I saw my ex the other day which at first I tried to avoid because I am still too hurt about our break-up and upset that he ignored my IMs and text messages and even my last email. I really feel he...
A. 18 September 2009: No way! Don't feel guilty, AT ALL! You did good and exactly what you should have done. He was being disrespectful and it was rude of him to have ignored you in the past. And now that he just magically appears at your home he expects you to swoon ... (read in full...)
She doesn't always take the pill at the same time. Can I ejactulate inside her??
Q. I have a question about birth control. My girlfriend was on the pill (Ortho Tri Cyclen Low) for about 4 years. She took a 6 month break and has been back on it for about 10 months now. She takes it each morning when she gets up, but that time ...
A. 18 September 2009: It's not necessarily "safe" she could still get pregnant...but it's probably unlikely. I've never been a pill-taker at the exact same time...more like generally in the same time period like your gf, and I have never gotten pregnant even without a ... (read in full...)
Don't you think he should show me if he wants to be with me?
Q. Hello, I' m Artemis, and I'm gay. I ended my relationship with my boyfriend a while ago and I can't move on, I'm desperate because this whole situation is affecting every single aspect of my life, 3 weeks ago I saw him, we said hi and all that, we ...
A. 18 September 2009: Well, if you were the one that ended the relationship--my best guess would be that he is probably waiting for you to make a move. He's probably also hurt and still cares about you, but being that he was the one that was dumped he probably doesn't ... (read in full...)
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