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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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I only seem to attract older men who want to have sex. Is it because of my behaviour?
Q. I always feel like i attract men that only want to have fun with me. There was a professor who is married that tried to get into my pants he never did. then there was a thirty year old that only wanted to get into my pants. I just want to know why i ...
A. 4 November 2009: It's okay to flirt, but it's about how you do it. As long as you put very minimal to no comments regarding sexual inudendo, then they won't be so quick to think that you're good for one thing. I flirt with some guys all the time, but it's just ... (read in full...)
I'm developing feelings for him even though it's wrong. What do I do?
Q. I have known this guy since I was a little girl, our families are beyond best friends. We have been spending a lot of time talking, and I am quickly becoming infatuated with him, because he's been exposed to me and my family life so much, he ...
A. 4 November 2009: It's okay to have a crush on him--it's only wrong on his part if he acts on anything. Don't tempt him with anything that could cause him to get into trouble. Leave it be for now, we all have a time (or a few times) in our life when we have a crush ... (read in full...)
Raped by two men and troubled by porn
Q. [Moderator note: some spelling errors corrected, paragraphs added for easier reading] So to start off my question I'd like to say that I was drugged and raped by two guys a couple of years back. But My question is that the last thing I remember...
A. 4 November 2009: He REALLY needs to know why it bothers you; otherwise, he's going to assume you're just overreacting about nothing. Tell him everything: what bothers you, how it bothers you, what doesn't bother you, and why it bothers you. I don't think it's even ... (read in full...)
I had an abortion and now my sister won't talk to me!
Q. Should I say sorry to my sister, I had an abortion in April and my sister got very angry at me, she is very pro-life and wanted to to weigh my other options. She did not talk to me for a couple of months, and it was really hard not being able to ...
A. 4 November 2009: No, you have nothing that you need to apologize about. I wouldn't be so nice about it if I were you. I'm sure you had your reasons as to why you had an abortion, and those are your reasons and you don't need to apologize for them. I know what ... (read in full...)
They say I am pretty but fat. Should I be offended?
Q. Okay soo. Im 13 and i am over weight. please dont comment giving me tips on how to lose weight or on how to be healthier, im offended enough. i have low self asteem when it comes to my body, i have a stunning face but my body just isnt right, and ...
A. 4 November 2009: So you don't want tips on how to lose weight or be healthier, but you don't know what to do? You're unhappy about something that you can probably do something about. I'm sorry if this sounds mean, but I'm just being honest, if you're so unhappy ... (read in full...)
I only seem to attract older men who want to have sex. Is it because of my behaviour?
Q. I always feel like i attract men that only want to have fun with me. There was a professor who is married that tried to get into my pants he never did. then there was a thirty year old that only wanted to get into my pants. I just want to know why i ...
A. 4 November 2009: It would help if you were specific about your behavior. Do you think you behave in a particular way that would lead men to believe you just want to have "fun?" ... (read in full...)
How can I Deep Throat a boy without gagging?
Q. Okey my problem isnt a really big one but a good answer will really help me in my situation. i want to give my boy friend the best blowjob ever and i kno this question has been asked alot but i need some tips on how to deep throat with out feeling ...
A. 3 November 2009: Learn to control your gag reflex?... (read in full...)
My co-worker has a b/f but tells everyone I'm taken?
Q. im a little confused by this situation. this girl I work with is dating someone else. we are really good friends. lately she's been acting real different. she's been questioning my past relationships, about my beliefs over cheating and such. after ...
A. 3 November 2009: Eww, she sounds gross. Sexual harassment anyone? She definitely has some sort of crush on you, and is considering cheating on her boyfriend with you. I agree with gerta on the whole "buttering up" thing. I'd stay away from her for sure. I think ... (read in full...)
Can you go from sexually active to abstinent to make sure he's the right guy?
Q. Hey, umm, I have been sexually active for about two years now and I have had three partners, two in which i have been serious with, and one, was just a one night stand. after that one time, i kinda felt guilty about it because i did it out of spite. ...
A. 3 November 2009: I think it's a bit easier to do that with a new guy and not a guy you've already been having sex with. That one would be a bit more complicated. I don't think it would be just because they're guys either--if a guy I had been intimate with declared ... (read in full...)
I lied to my date about basic info
Q. I'm new to the whole online dating scene but I figure why not give it a shot. I'm a very personal person and I did not want to reveal that much information about myself in case I do not like the guy. So I chatted with this guy online and he wa...
A. 3 November 2009: Ok, I can maybe see you lying about your name or where your family is...maybe. But your age too? You lied way too much, there is such a thing as telling a person too much information, being subtle, or just lying. If you would have just told him ... (read in full...)
I'm flirting with someone's boyfriend. Does he like me?
Q. I finally told this boy I liked him, even though he has a girlfriend. He always flirts with me and the other night he was sending me some extremly flirty texts about if he didn't have a girlfriend he would get with me and do stuff. I really like...
A. 2 November 2009: I think you should be more concerned with your insecurities than whether or not this boy actually likes you (and he probably doesn't). If you were more secure with yourself, you wouldn't go after boys with girlfriends.... (read in full...)
Is this incest?
Q. Ok, Im 19.. I have a 21 year old sister who has a boyfriend at the age of 35.. He has a nephew at the same age as me! We have been talking for a while and my sister found out and her and her boyfriend tried to set us up... My sister an her bo...
A. 2 November 2009: No.... (read in full...)
Is his text evidence that he is cheating?
Q. I saw my boyfriend texting this other girl, and I thought nothing of it until I caught a glimpse at the end of the text, and he wrote love you to her. I know that she is not a family member and he told me that he was talking to a guy and not a girl. ...
A. 2 November 2009: I have to disagree with Violet, "love you" to a girl that he said was a guy warrants some suspiscion. I think it's best to calmly call him out on it. Just tell him, "You know the other day when I asked who you were texting? Well I noticed that ... (read in full...)
Should I contact him and tell him how I feel, or
Q. I'm conflicted, I care for this guy we were together for three yrs. I found out he has another girlfriend now ( and may I say she and i could be twins with exception I'm not trying to be full of myself but I'm way more attractive than she is but ...
A. 2 November 2009: Think about this: you're following a pattern. You wouldn't date him because of a past hurtful relationship and now you're pining over this guy that has also hurt you. I was in a very similar situation with a complete idiot like this dude, it's ... (read in full...)
I believe I may be pregnant but part of me is unsure even after taking a pregancy test.
Q. I believe I may be pregnant but part of me is unsure even after taking a pregancy test. The reason is very simple, the man I've been sleeping with has had a vesectomy and we use condoms. Is there any chance that this man could possible produce a ...
A. 2 November 2009: Well, a vasectomy isn't 100% effective just like most birth control, but if he was also wearing a condom...it would have to be some freak accident of the condom slipping off or having a tear and a chance of him actually ejaculating sperm. So I can ... (read in full...)
How do I reply to his text?
Q. Hey everyone. So I have been devasted and lost for the past week and a bit because my boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me. It was a shock and I haven't been able to function properly all week. His is reasons for breaking up with me were the ...
A. 31 October 2009: Three people tell you to not reply and you do the opposite. He's going to walk all over you if you're always at his beck and call, be careful.... (read in full...)
How do I reply to his text?
Q. Hey everyone. So I have been devasted and lost for the past week and a bit because my boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me. It was a shock and I haven't been able to function properly all week. His is reasons for breaking up with me were the ...
A. 31 October 2009: Sorry but no, the truth doesn't necessarily come out when you're drunk. I've drunk texted plenty of people and what I said at the time, I meant it at that time, but in the morning I was like, "Damn! Why did I do that?!" We get lonely and ... (read in full...)
I consistently dawged this woman out and I need to make amends!
Q. Hi, I have a huge issue that I created for myself. FOur years ago I meet the woman of my dreams but at the time I didnt realize it. I didnt realize it until recently. She did everything in her power to please me and because I was so bitter of...
A. 31 October 2009: As long as your very sure that you mean all this (I'm saying this so that you don't end up taking it back) you just tell her what you told us. This is an easy one, women love when men share their feelings. Just tell her how you feel, that you ... (read in full...)
How would you act and behave to your ex that dumped you?
Q. If it were you, how would treat an ex that yea was good and bad to you, not necessarily the best, you made your own mistakes but was very cold to you which eventually led to breaking up with you after trying so hard to mend things. You finally ...
A. 30 October 2009: Don't be mean, but don't be too nice. Yes, I would say cordial is the appropriate term. Especially if they're trying to get back with you and you are not interested, you don't want to be too nice to lead them on and lead them to believe that ... (read in full...)
Just come off the pill......
Q. Just come off the pill, when I was on it I was not really interested in sex. Now that I'm off I want it more than usual! ;) Just wondered if anyone else has experienced this and if its a normal thing to have happened when coming off the pill....
A. 30 October 2009: Yes, it has happened to me. My sex drive lowers quite a bit while on the pill, then when I'm off the pill I become more interested in sex. I would suggest staying on the pill for sure though even if you're not having sex--you never know what may ... (read in full...)
Do you think I've upset or offended her???
Q. Hey there, last week i asked my best friend out (we're both girls and bi). She's known how i feel about her for about 6 months now, and she said she loved me back, but when i asked her out, she said no. this sort of crushed me and the last week ive ...
A. 30 October 2009: You two are very young and to say that you're bi at such a young age might just be some confusion on her part. You may fully be aware that you are, but she may not be sure. She maybe be confused about her sexuality and since you asked her out, she ... (read in full...)
Is this serous and will this pain go away?
Q. Hello everyone. I thought that I would ask on here before going to the doctor's in case it's normal. The thing is I recently got married and we went on our honeymoon straight afterwards. During our two week honeymoon we had a lot of sex. About foir ...
A. 30 October 2009: I've never heard of this before, but just out of curiosity is it your muscles in your neck at the base of your skull or is it a pain that's further in? I'd be a little worried if it's not knots or muscles straining--you might want to get that ... (read in full...)
No guy will like me, they all just want sex. I just want to crawl into a black hole and not come out. Can someone help me?
Q. Okay so me and my well now ex have been dating for about a year and a half. I was 16 when I met him and we started dating when I turned 17. I'm 18 now and he's 21. We recently broke up for I don't even remember, but he "joked" that he wants to get ...
A. 30 October 2009: Now, now--don't start feeling this way about yourself. You will come to find that most men are idiots...even the good ones are idiots, but that's just because they think completely differently than us and we just don't get it.
You feel like cra... (read in full...)
Is 8 partners too many at my age?
Q. Im 20 and have been having sex since i was 17. i have had 8 partners and when i told my new bf he looked shocked. he said it was becouse im not loose down there. but i feel like he thought that was alot. is 8 partners at my age to many?...
A. 30 October 2009: Okay, it's laughable that your boyfriend would think that you would be "loose" from having sex with 8 people. Let me just give you some advice, don't discuss how many people you've had sex with with future boyfriends. As for your question, I don't ... (read in full...)
Should I go to his party? And if I do, my two dress choices may make me look like I'm dressing to impress!
Q. I'm going to a formal dress party on friday night, hosted by the guy I like. Things have been eventful lately with us - we got together and then he freaked out a little and said it was all going too fast and we should just be friends, get to know ...
A. 29 October 2009: I think you should go if you want to, and I think you do. As far as how you look--you want to look hot! Don't look trampy, but you're probably overthinking your dresses that probably look nice. I highly doubt he would think that you would be ... (read in full...)
So do you think I'm pregnant?
Q. I think i might be pregnant. I had sex about 5 months ago and i was on birth control and he was using a condum. I got my period for the first 3 months and than missed it the fourth month i than got it at the begining of the fifth month and i was ...
A. 29 October 2009: Yes, I agree with sugarbuns. If you are pregnant I would be greatly surprised. ... (read in full...)
My girl friend dated my best friend before me and I find this difficult
Q. Me and my girlfriend have dated for about 5 months now and I love her but she dated my best friend just before me and her. They dated for about 2 months. She told me it was not a big deal at all and it was not serious but if it was not a big deal I ...
A. 28 October 2009: Even if she wasn't drunk, it's her own business what she did in the past. Who cares? I'm sure there's a lot more that happened that you don't know about and probably don't need to know about. You shouldn't judge her. I question why you date you ... (read in full...)
He says he wants to be friends but is now avoiding me
Q. Is it a bad thing that I feel as if the guy who wants to stay friends is avoiding me now? We do not have any of the same classes but we pass by every morning and he never says hello anymore. When I asked him out he said he wanted to stay friends but ...
A. 28 October 2009: He probably doesn't want to lead you on to believe that there will be anything more. Quiet-echo is right about people becoming comfused when the person they are interested in is still being friendly, it will still give you hope that maybe something ... (read in full...)
He moved in immediately with me but I think it was a mistake
Q. I recently moved a guy into my house that i didnt even know. The first day i met him he moved in with me. He told me he wanted to be with me and stuff and i am a sucker for beleiveing stuff like this stupid i no but ive always been the same. When he ...
A. 28 October 2009: "...i do like him and can see a future but i dont fink he'l change..."
How can you like him or see a future with him? You've known him three weeks and he's obviously using you. Of course he's not going to change, again you've known him for 3 we... (read in full...)
We had a tiff, he's ignored me for 4 days, is it over?
Q. My boyfriend and I had a minor tiff 4 days ago - and he's ignored me pretty much totally since. We've been together 7 months, and don't really argue much. To cut a long story short, I was invited to a family lunch over the weekend. Someth...
A. 28 October 2009: I'm going to just tell you now, that it's the beginning of the end. I know you won't go through with it, but just so I know I said something, break up with him if he doesn't contact you very soon and apologize. I've dated 2 guys that have done ... (read in full...)
Ladies: what is your experience with sex on prom night?
Q. I’m going to the winter formal soon. I truely care about my boyfriend . I look forward to a the evening of dressing up etc. the thought of sex has entered my mind. If we have sex on the winter formal night I think it should be with someone like my ...
A. 28 October 2009: Sex on "prom nights" or winter formal...that's in the movies. Just because it's a fancy dance doesn't mean you have to go out with a bang.... (read in full...)
Can I help unstress her? How?
Q. hi i'm 18 and the girl i like told me she does'nt think we should get together because shes so busy at uni we now only see each other at wrk and wknds but txt all the time is there anything i can say or do to help relieve all her stress shes been ...
A. 27 October 2009: If she's too busy, you don't want to bombard her by trying to relieve her stress. Putting any extra pressure on her or giving her the idea that you want anything more when she doesn't will only add stress to her life. Just be a friend to her and ... (read in full...)
I am in love with a married woman. What can we do about it?
Q. been married for 14 years have 2 beautiful kids but i'm not in love with my wife anymore i'm in love with another women who is also married 20 years. went to school and graduated with this women her marriage is bad also she is not happy we want to ...
A. 27 October 2009: You both get a divorce, get together, and hope it works out...... (read in full...)
Do you think he is just taking things slow or is he seeing someone else?
Q. I met this guy about a lil over a month ago we have hung out eight times overnight at his house. He is a very busy guy with work mon thru fri and is training for mma fighter. He has a set routine all week and on the weekends is when he sees his ...
A. 27 October 2009: Eh...he could be, but I doubt he's seeing someone else. If someone has been hurt in the past AND they have a lot going on, they may not be ready to get too involved. He probably does "like" you, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's ready for a ... (read in full...)
What is so gross about breast feeding?
Q. Why do other girls give me looks when i say im breast feeding my baby? why does people think its gross? i mean thats way babys are ment to be feed. i think with it being flu season and babys die from the flu it would be selfish for me not to breast ...
A. 27 October 2009: I don't think it's the act of breast feeding that bothers some women (at least I would hope not) but it's how some women do it. I've seen a woman walking through a store that I worked at and she just had her shirt lifted up and was breast feeding, ... (read in full...)
Does no one want me because of my reputation?
Q. im 16 and have never had a boyfriend but ive slept with 3 boys which mean nothing to me and i really wish i hadnt, but i really want a boyfriend but no one seems to want me coz they think im just goin to sleep about which im not i really do want a ...
A. 26 October 2009: "It's just 3 guys" ???? Okay at 16, personally, I think 3 is a bit much and can ruin your reputation. I think in high school everyone knows everyone else's drama so boys may be less inclined to have you as their girlfriend because of your ... (read in full...)
Is my friend correct about my hymen not being intact?
Q. I can fit my middle finger inside my vagina without any discomfort my friend said that this probably means that my hymen isn't intact, even though I've never had sex is this true?...
A. 26 October 2009: Not necessarily. It could be intact or it might not. Just because you've never had sex before doesn't mean that you can't break your hymen from sports or any other activity. ... (read in full...)
What can I do to stimulate my girlfriend? She's always dry.
Q. Dear Cupid, My girlfriend can't seem to get wet for me. She gets in the mood but when we attempt to have sex, she is as dry as ever. But yet, she still can be stimulated by touch, but not MY touch. Why does this happen? What must I do to s...
A. 26 October 2009: You're probably not the problem, it's just a problem that she has (some women have that problem and it may be hormonal). She should probably see a doctor about it, and in the meantime buy some KY.... (read in full...)
How do I stop getting my hopes up?
Q. hi please help as previousley posted - my girlfriend endedd our relationship in april - i suspected that she was seeing someone else and guess what within a week she said she was ina relationship. Like a fool I chased and chased her - but she ju...
A. 26 October 2009: Block her email or just don't email her back anymore. She's going to keep doing what she's doing and you're going to keep feeling the same way, so just cut her out of your life for good.... (read in full...)
I already know he's a womanizer. Should I go for it?
Q. I am in a relationship with a divorced man who is well educated. I love him and had sex with him. Recently he has been saying about his past relationships and it appears that he had sex with two other women when he was married just because he had a ...
A. 26 October 2009: So he's using you for emotional support...okay? So in other words, he always needs a woman to make him feel better about himself. You can't make him change (I know you're not trying to), he can only change on his own because he wants to. I don't ... (read in full...)
Is my curiosity going to hurt my girlfriend?
Q. Ok, here we go. First off, me and my girlfriend have been going out for about six months. My friend, which is a girl, broke up with her boyfriend just recently. Me and him use to play in a band together. And thats how i meet the other girl. I...
A. 26 October 2009: This is called being selfish. You don't believe in cheating but you did it, but you still want to be friends with your girlfriend that you cheated on (which would make her stupid if she stayed friends with you) AND you want to date your friends ex ... (read in full...)
I already know he's a womanizer. Should I go for it?
Q. I am in a relationship with a divorced man who is well educated. I love him and had sex with him. Recently he has been saying about his past relationships and it appears that he had sex with two other women when he was married just because he had a ...
A. 26 October 2009: I think that you'll just end up hurt in the end. No relationship is perfect, so of course people end up getting into disagreements; therefore, if you two get into an argument he thinks that it's a justifiable reason to sleep with some other woman. ... (read in full...)
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