A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Why is it hard to get over someone even though you know that there are so many better guys out there that are fighting for a chance to date you? I am just so confused!!I compare every guy to my ex, and even if the new guy seems to have every better quality, I still think about my ex and don't give anyone a chance. This has been happening for too long and I may have missed out on very many nice guys in the process...I dont understand why I only want to be with my ex and his even not some great qualities seem great?Im really trying to move on but I just dont understand what my infatuations is with him when he is not even anything speacil when i REALLY thing about it.,I hope i don't end up alone forever because of this stupid ex!!!UGH!!!! Help please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:-(
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (21 September 2009):
It maybe that you don't understand why you and your ex split, in which case you'll find it a lot harder to let it all go. Time will slowly heal this. But it's worth at least going out for a few dates with these other nice men. They won't ever be your ex, because they're all different. When you can accept that, you'll find everything a lot easier. xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2009): I do have the same problem , and just moved from my ex house
i cant get over my ex , i see him in every guy , i compare him to every other guy
the point is the time will heal it and focus on his negatives
i am sure he has many
and remember always
If you’ve ever suffered from a broken heart, you recognize the grief described is quite real. Trauma endured from a heartbreak can pervade every aspect of one’s life rendering some a prisoner to their own pain. Time irrefutably helps the healing process, yet thankfully, time is neither the only, nor most powerful healing agent.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (21 September 2009):
No worries, you will not be alone forever. I think you kind of missed something important, which is: how long have you been broken up? Breakups take time...it's a grieving process. If you have to (and I've had to) is to just not date anyone at all until you feel that you are ready and in the meantime be selfish and focus only on yourself.
I really hope that you're not staying in any sort of contact with your ex, because that WILL without a doubt prolong the process of getting over him. And also think of it this way, you know that the things that you think are so "great" about him really aren't that great, so I would also assume that perhaps you also feel this way because you can't have him anymore--he isn't in your life. With that said, we all know that we want what we cannot have.
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