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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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What do good guys look for in a girl?
Q. How do I attract good guys, I dont know what I am doing but I always seem to attract bad guys. Lots of people think that I want bad guys but the truth is I dont notice their bad behavior til later on and I do leave always. So my question is if I did ...
A. 12 October 2009: The only way you find out is by getting to know them. I think it's true that a lot of has to do with who you are attracting. Sometimes we don't realize who we are attracting, then we figure out it's a bad guy after we get in deep enough and are ... (read in full...)
Does sex play a huge role in dating?
Q. How long do you wait for sex with a guy so he doesnt think you are a hoe or slut?...
A. 12 October 2009: I also agree, it depends on the guy. A guy may think you're some slut because you waited months, a few days, or the first night. I don't agree that every guy you sleep with on the first night will think you're slut, it's such a double standard, ... (read in full...)
How can I get this apartment rented??
Q. My problem is that I am probably about to be kicked out of my apartment because my boyfriend and I can't afford the bills anymore. When we first signed the lease, we were both working full-time and I was going to school (still am, but working ...
A. 12 October 2009: Craigslist is about the only way to go with that besides asking people you know. Sometimes the newspaper online you can post an ad, but I'm not sure if they charge a fee. My only advice is to give a lot of info about the place, terms and ... (read in full...)
Troubled girlfriend looking for a way to make my boyfriend realize what he's got before it's gone...
Q. My boyfriend is going through a divorce, but still talks to his ex ALL the time. They have a daughter together, so I understand them having to talk some, but not about how eachother's day went, etc. He is constantly texting when he is with me, but ...
A. 12 October 2009: One thing that I've noticed when people are having trouble in their relationship is it is a failure to communicate. If you haven't talked to him about how is behavior is making you feel, then you really need to. Not saying anything to him at all ... (read in full...)
How do I get rid of my acne?
Q. I wash my face every morning using Dove liquid soap, warm water and a sponge. I have been doing this for about 2months now, I used to have quite bad acne, but I still have it although it has almost completely gone. I usually drink 2 litres ...
A. 12 October 2009: So I've had on and off bad acne...since you're male taking birth control is obviously not a choice--as there is a certain that has helped me. However, topically the only things that have worked for me are cleaners and a type of toner that contain ... (read in full...)
He asks me over and then makes out with another girl right in front of me!
Q. this guy/friend i used to sleep with calls me and hes like please come see me..so i go over there were making out hugging holding blah blah i mean its obvious he likes me cuz he told me he cared about me and he thought i was so beautiful n stuff ...
A. 12 October 2009: Oh my God, forget why, besides he's a total asshole. Yes, I agree delete him from everything. Do not show him that you're jealous, sad, or anything--that's what he wants. What a dick, seriously do not talk to him ever!... (read in full...)
He just wants to be friends. Is there any possibility that I can be with him?
Q. I am in love with a guy that I have known for a long time. He was good friends with my ex husband before we had an affair. My ex husband was very abusive and controlling. After the affair the guy I'm in love with moved away and I stayed with my ex ...
A. 11 October 2009: You can't be "just friends" with him. You have feelings for him and want a relationship with him, your feelings aren't going to change overnight. So, stop being his doormat and when he wants to "hang out" all the time tell him no. Staying friends ... (read in full...)
Can my girlfriend get pregnant if I didn't release sperm during sex?
Q. Can my girlfriend be pregnant if i didnt release sperm during sex, and can i tell if she is if it happen in june. ...
A. 10 October 2009: Yes, she can get pregnant. Just out of curiosity, if it happened in June, and she was pregnant she would be 4 months along--has she missed her period since then, weight gain, or other pregnancy symptoms? I guess some people can go 4-months and not ... (read in full...)
I feel deep in my soul that he's "the one". Why won't he ask me out on a date?
Q. What is it about when a man has been showing interest in having a relationship with me for over a year and a half but won't ask me out for a date? He is going through a divorce after a long term marriage and having a very hard time of it. I am...
A. 10 October 2009: If he's going through a divorce then he may not be ready to start a new relationship. He could be confused and not know what he wants, meaning, there are times when he wants a relationship with you then he goes back to not knowing what he wants. ... (read in full...)
He just wants to be friends. Is there any possibility that I can be with him?
Q. I am in love with a guy that I have known for a long time. He was good friends with my ex husband before we had an affair. My ex husband was very abusive and controlling. After the affair the guy I'm in love with moved away and I stayed with my ex ...
A. 10 October 2009: If you want a relationship with this guy and he's already told you that he doesn't at the moment then for now, all you can do is move on. If you try to keep pushing a relationship with him, it will screw it up even more, and just keep pushing him ... (read in full...)
My husband moved out to pursue employment. Any tips on how to get through this?
Q. My husband moved out 3 weeks ago to "pursue" employment in another state. He left me and our two daughters (11 and 14) behind to finish school year. He has hated where we live and his being unemployed really took a toll on him. He said he feels ...
A. 10 October 2009: Yes, I definitely agree with softtouch. I think your husband is unhappy with the way his life is going outside of his family and possibly he feels that to be a better husband and father he needs to do this type of "soul searching." I don't have a ... (read in full...)
How do I fix my severe insecurities?
Q. hi there. i have a problem and its something that on mind 24/7. ive met this guy who is the only person since my first love that i was giddy and excited with butterflys. were doing a long distance relationship. he is 4 years younger than me ie 19 ...
A. 10 October 2009: It's natural to have some worry about someone that you're in a relationship with when you don't see them as often. I think a lot of people have been cheated on (including myself and it wasn't a LDR) and the hard part is trusting again.
You j... (read in full...)
Is he backing off from me?
Q. hi ive been together with my boyfriend for one and half years, we were good together, but for the last four months or so i do not feel as though we are the same. we would text each other at least ten times per day, and he would ring me when he ...
A. 10 October 2009: To be honest, he may be becoming slightly distant because you are being a little clingy/needy. I think it's fairly reasonable to talk in the morning, night, and sometimes inbetween. Talking too much leads to a boring relationship, what do you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and I had sex without protection, but I had my period. Could I be pregnant anyway?
Q. okay so me an my boyfriend had sex without a condom cuz we didnt have 1 like a week and a half ago. he pulled out wenever he was ganna cum and ive had my period already but cud i still b pregnant? because hes ben freakin out cuz ppl have made it ...
A. 10 October 2009: Don't cows chew cud?... (read in full...)
My boyfriend insults me and punched me in the back!
Q. My boyfriend of almost two years has a huge insecurity about how he compares to other men. I have reassured him (for these two years) that he is the man I want and who I want to be with - oh, and I am 26, he is 30. Last night we were out to...
A. 10 October 2009: Wow, I'm glad you realize this is a VERY bad relationship. Not only is he abusive, he's also manipulative. When he does wrong, he twists it around to being your fault when clearly it is not.
I know you feel trapped, but you're not. You can ... (read in full...)
Do you think he will really leave his wife for me?
Q. Me ad my first luv lost communications two years ago .he married i got married .i got divorced later but he is stil in his marriage .we are nw back togather again but he has his wife .he promises to come and stay with me .i luv him so much but i ...
A. 9 October 2009: Although I wish I was a fortune teller, I am not, so I do not know if he will ever leave his wife. However, as the story usually goes, men will not leave their wife for another woman. If anything, his wife will find out, she'll divorce him, he'll ... (read in full...)
Is there a big chance I could get pregnant?
Q. okay so last night my boyfriend and i attempted to have sex but the problem is since it was my first time it wouldn't fit. we did use a condom and it didn't go in. is there a big chance i can still get pregnant. because i have an irregular period s...
A. 9 October 2009: He had a condom on, it didn't get all the way in, and he didn't come--more than likely no!... (read in full...)
When can I take a pregnancy test?
Q. Hi. So, here is my situation: my boyfriend and I had unprotected sex (stupid, yes) the day after my period ended. Ten days later, even though I know it is unlikely that we conceived, I feel weird. PMS-like symptoms, nausea/hunger, everything smells ...
A. 9 October 2009: If you conceived right after your period (which is possible) you can take the test a little earlier and it may or may not show--it depends on how much hormone your body is producing. Although, 10 days after conception would be rather early to be ... (read in full...)
What should I believe? I'm disgusted and don't know if he's cheated...
Q. I recently found an email conversation between my boyfriend and another Guy that was very sexual. He told this Guy where we live and told him to meet him in the 24hr gym to have sex. My boyfriend says he never went but a follow up email from the ...
A. 9 October 2009: I think it's pretty clear as to what you should believe, you saw the email about meeting up with a guy, and then you saw another about wanting to do it again--meaning they've done it before. He's cheating on you with men and if he hasn't already, ... (read in full...)
Had an abortion, now I'm craving chocolate. Am I pregnant again?
Q. I'm due my period on the 12 oct 09. I'm craving for chocolates,and I've done a p test but it's negative. Am I pregnant? Because I had a abortion on the 10 aug 09.and im trying for a baby....
A. 9 October 2009: Yeah, I agree that you don't make much sense either. Craving chocolate doesn't mean anything, I crave chocolate before my period starts...test please!... (read in full...)
Why did he delete the sexy photos I sent him?
Q. i took a sexy picture of myslef in lingerie for my man, put it on his computer for him as a surprize and he deletes it!!!!! what the flying fuck? i'm not fat i'm not unattractive so what the hell? i've asked him about it but haven't got a response ...
A. 9 October 2009: Oh jeez, what a way for him to make a huge blow to your self esteem. Does he share the computer with anyone? That's the only thing that I could think of as to why he would delete it. I would definitely be pissed too if I took the time and the ... (read in full...)
At what age can a girl get pregnant?
Q. at what age a girl can get pregnant?...
A. 9 October 2009: Actually, pregnancy can occur before a girl gets her first period, she can ovulate a few weeks before her period actually starts. My sister started hers when she was 9--so obviously it varies from person to person.... (read in full...)
Is this a Big Red Flag?
Q. This is a strange question My man (of 1 yr) who is kind, caring, gentle, fun, etc. Has what I think may be a problem... Hard to put in words.But if he thinks someone is Disrespectful he overreacts even if it was unintentional. His reactions ...
A. 9 October 2009: I would say that by the way he reacts to these things, yes it is. I wouldn't say necessarily the getting upset at silly things that most people wouldn't, even I do sometimes. But not talking to you for 3-weeks, that's a problem. He shuts down ... (read in full...)
She looked at my lips! Does this mean anything?
Q. I am a 14 year old female who is bi, and I like a 13 year old female who is straight. She knows I'm bi, she knows I like her. We've known each other for almost 3 years. I've liked her for about 8 months. Anyway, you don't really need all this ...
A. 9 October 2009: Would it mean anything different if she glanced at your eyebrows? I really don't think it meant anything, if someone is smiling, people have a tendency to look at their mouth.... (read in full...)
During sex I decided it wasnt right..was that rape?
Q. I met up with this guy and concented to sex...then during sex I decided this wasnt right and asked him repeatedly to stop....he didnt, I even tried moving but I wasnt strong enough, when it was all over I just let it go and stayed the night....I ...
A. 9 October 2009: Replacement-you're right, I guess I can't relate because I wouldn't agree to have sex with a man unless I knew that I wanted to...so judge all you want as to what's weird. Personally, I think it's weird to have sex with someone and then in the ... (read in full...)
During sex I decided it wasnt right..was that rape?
Q. I met up with this guy and concented to sex...then during sex I decided this wasnt right and asked him repeatedly to stop....he didnt, I even tried moving but I wasnt strong enough, when it was all over I just let it go and stayed the night....I ...
A. 9 October 2009: Why? Do you want to go to the authorities about it? Sorry, but you stopped a guy DURING sex...that's a bit late to decide that it didn't feel "right." Yes, he should have stopped as you requested, but you consented to begin with--I wouldn't ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for a woman to ask a man out?
Q. I have another question, is it wrong for woman to ask man out on a date? Does it start a cycle of a woman taking the male role in the relationship?...
A. 8 October 2009: No, it's not wrong. I've done it before...well I wouldn't say I asked him on a date, but I took the initiative of us hanging out. I usually try and make it casual, not something that seems like a "date." A few friends of mine have done the same ... (read in full...)
Why am I attracted ONLY to older MEN?
Q. Hi there, The thing is I'm not coming here for professional advise, but for some educated opinions, and maybe a parallel to one's own experience (if there are any). I did seek some help on this issue when I was an undergrad and my school therapist...
A. 8 October 2009: I'm nearing 26 and recently (within the last 2-months) have grown a fascination and attraction to older men (when I say older, I mean older than I would normally date). I never had this interest before, I typically dated guys in my age group. ... (read in full...)
I'm dating an extremely busy guy, what do you think, should I just let him go?
Q. The situation is this: I'm dating an extremely busy guy, who has a lot of things going on in his life right now. I don't really know what to "call" our situation. He kissed me on the head (I don't know what this means. People claim that it's ...
A. 8 October 2009: Well, I'm getting the vibe that this relationship is basically some companionship when it's convenient for him, which of course isn't very fair to you. I wouldn't say he's not interested in YOU but he just may not be emotionally available or ... (read in full...)
Are watery eyes while giving a blowjob a turn off?
Q. Is it a turn off if a girl's eyes are super watery after/during a blowjob? I'm excited because I finally got the hang of deep throating and I can fit my boyfriend's entire dick now. And don't worry, I wasn't forced to learn or anything; my ...
A. 8 October 2009: Highly doubt it's a turn off. If anything, it makes the guy think that he's large enough to make you gag resulting in watery eyes. You could always ask him yourself and I'm almost 100% sure he would say that it isn't a turn off but a turn on.... (read in full...)
We put on gay porn and had sex am I gay
Q. Ok i have a problem, A few weeks ago I bunch of my buddies and I went out to a bar we got really drunk and one of my buddies decided to crash at my house. We were bored and put on porn, we weere just talking when we looked up and didnt ever realize ...
A. 8 October 2009: Okay, so I'm guessing you're not female even though it says you are. It's up to you to decide if you're gay. If you are attracted to men and do sexual acts with men, then yes, you are typically considered gay. I only say this because the "typical ... (read in full...)
Is he just being polite or is he interested?
Q. ok so here it goes. everyday when i walk to campus i pass this really cute guy. each time we pass each other he makes eye contact with me and smiles. is he interested? or is he just being polite? im not good at reading guys signals so i need some ...
A. 8 October 2009: Did you not read what another poster and I suggested???...... (read in full...)
It's hopeless! Girls won't give me a chance!
Q. I am going to collage right now, i am 19 and single and have not really ever had a girlfriend. In high school at graduation someone told me that almost all the girls thought i was gay because i didn't ever harass or grope anyone. This just upset and ...
A. 7 October 2009: In your case, you're a rarity. For your age (and even a lot of guys older than you) you seem much more mature and levelheaded than most guys or even girls. When girls are young, which even I've been guilty of in the past, is to be attracted to the ... (read in full...)
Is he just being polite or is he interested?
Q. ok so here it goes. everyday when i walk to campus i pass this really cute guy. each time we pass each other he makes eye contact with me and smiles. is he interested? or is he just being polite? im not good at reading guys signals so i need some ...
A. 7 October 2009: I would guess so? If I find a guy attractive I'll look at him and smile, don't you? Next time he does it, say, "hi." More than likely, he'll get the gumption to talk to you--then you'll know for sure that he's interested.... (read in full...)
Men and sex
Q. I have a question about what men like during sex. I have been with a few different people, but my new boyfriend likes something that none of the others have. He likes to lick my butt. I have had boyfriends who liked to play with my butt, and who ...
A. 7 October 2009: I don't know if it's "normal" but it's not out of ordinary...some guys like doing that, I have been with some that like to, I don't know if they "loved" it, but it has happened.... (read in full...)
I had a bad accident, will women want to date me?
Q. I haven't dated in over 17 years and I don't want to be alone forever. I was nearly killed in a car accident when I was 24(I'm 41 now).I was a bodybuilder at the time,which doctors say probably saved my life.I was drunk(.33)4 times the limit....
A. 6 October 2009: Okay, regardless of what people say like Lazy Guy, about a bad choice you made in the past--ignore it. It happened 17 years ago and obviously you've had to deal with some serious issues and paid for the consequences.
Yes, there are women that wou... (read in full...)
I can't read this guy! He wants to marry me by the 2nd date!
Q. Hi I'm in quite a situation and it's my own fault so it's ok if you tell me I messed up cause I know. Anyway here's the problem I just met this guy from Mexico and I asked him out we went on 2 dates and he says he loves me. I slept with him the ...
A. 6 October 2009: Yes, run fast and don't look back!... (read in full...)
How do we get birth control pills without our parents finding out?
Q. So me and my best friend were talking the other day about birth control we relized that we both need to go on the pill but nether of us wants our parents to find out we would be dead. She's in a long term relationship and is talking about haveing ...
A. 3 October 2009: I can't see the picture that shows where you're from, but, if you're in the U.S. there's Planned Parenthood, you can get the pill without parents knowing and it's free, they like it if you make a donation though.... (read in full...)
New girl wants my relationship status on facebook to change but I don't want to hurt my ex!
Q. Hi, I'm unsure what to do. I've started seeing a girl, and straight away she wants me to change my relationship status on Facebook to "In A Relationship". Now, before you believe that THAT is my problem then please let me continue! Over t...
A. 1 October 2009: Dude, it's Facebook! I sometimes cannot believe the controversy and drama that this stupid site creates. She's your ex, who cares what she and her dumb friends think? I don't think you owe her an apology for moving on with your life. If they are ... (read in full...)
Why does she refuse anal sex with me, her husband? She did this with her ex...
Q. my wife and I have always had a very honest relationship, but one night I asked to have anal sex. She denied me access so I asked why. We have attempted it once before, however I stopped because she really wasn't enjoying it. Her reply was very ...
A. 1 October 2009: So what was her reason why? Maybe she did this with her exes as she felt more obligated...she was younger and more experimental--as far as enjoying it though, I don't know too many women on the lookout for some anal sex (although there are few). ... (read in full...)
Am I being stood up? Or are the texts really not going through?
Q. First off, thank you all who take the time to read and respond to my question. I really appreciate it. Ok, so my ex-girlfriend and I have been split for about 3 weeks. She initiated the breakup so I agreed and went my separate way for about a week...
A. 1 October 2009: I would suspect yes. If she agreed to meet with you at a certain time, she would see a missed call from you, all while knowing that she has been "missing" text messages--it would make sense for her to call you back or at least text you!
So if... (read in full...)
New girl wants my relationship status on facebook to change but I don't want to hurt my ex!
Q. Hi, I'm unsure what to do. I've started seeing a girl, and straight away she wants me to change my relationship status on Facebook to "In A Relationship". Now, before you believe that THAT is my problem then please let me continue! Over t...
A. 28 September 2009: Yes, you are considering your ex more than your new girlfriend. If you were over your ex, then you wouldn't worry about hurting her feelings. Your ex will just have to get over it. You're worrying too much about making everyone happy--make the ... (read in full...)
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