| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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Need some info and insight about having sex on a girl's period. Help?
Q. I'm in a real pickle about this one. My current girlfriend and I trust each other enough to have unprotected sex, and of course I get that feeling that I want to cum inside of her, although I can always control that urge. Me and her were talking ...
A. 31 May 2012: About ejaculation and precum and all that. Ejaculation is often linked to the orgasm. But a man can ejaculate without there being an orgasm. I've experienced this in real life, so I know for a fact it can happen. The man can then feel like he is ... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 30 May 2012: Why is sex intimate? Well, maybe you're one of those who wants to do it in public in front of other people and maybe with several people at the same time as well, but most of us want it to be a private and intimate thing, seeing as you are going to ... (read in full...)
Can someone explain her behaviour to me?
Q. Can anyone give me some advice in regards to this girls behavior at the club last night? Okay , so I was with my friends last night at a club and I usually don't go to clubs but since it was my friends birthday I told myself I would make a ...
A. 29 May 2012: We've been telling you quite bluntly what you did wrong. You can either accept it or don't, battle social norm... or go with it. Social conduct says the man should greet the woman first. Not all live by this, but yes, most women will see it as rude ... (read in full...)
Need some info and insight about having sex on a girl's period. Help?
Q. I'm in a real pickle about this one. My current girlfriend and I trust each other enough to have unprotected sex, and of course I get that feeling that I want to cum inside of her, although I can always control that urge. Me and her were talking ...
A. 28 May 2012: Well, she needs to go to her doctors first and get a prescription. This is because she needs test first to see that she can actually take birth control pills. If there is a medical history that prevents it, she can't. High blood pressure or other ... (read in full...)
Need some info and insight about having sex on a girl's period. Help?
Q. I'm in a real pickle about this one. My current girlfriend and I trust each other enough to have unprotected sex, and of course I get that feeling that I want to cum inside of her, although I can always control that urge. Me and her were talking ...
A. 28 May 2012: Birth control pills are not expensive. Is there a specific reason for why you and her haven't started using them? ... (read in full...)
Need some info and insight about having sex on a girl's period. Help?
Q. I'm in a real pickle about this one. My current girlfriend and I trust each other enough to have unprotected sex, and of course I get that feeling that I want to cum inside of her, although I can always control that urge. Me and her were talking ...
A. 28 May 2012: Definitely talk to her about the possibility of you and her becoming parents, if you want to continue having unprotected sex. I have this conversation with all my boyfriends even though I DO NOT have unprotected sex. You can still get pregnant if ... (read in full...)
Is there a chance that a virgin won't bleed on her first sex?
Q. I just had sex with a girl, younger than my age. She claims that she has never done anything like that before and was REALLY innocent on our first try, so do I. I know nothing in making a distinction between the virgin one and the experienced one. ...
A. 28 May 2012: Listen.. sex between two people who love each other tends to be good. You enjoyed the blowjob because you love her, and her touching you feels great. She was good at it because she loves you, and likes to bring you pleasure. This is what makes a ... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 28 May 2012: When people say "wait for the right person" they usually do not mean "wait until marriage". Some do, sure, if they are old school and religious. But what most people mean when they say that is that the "right" person is someone YOU define as being ... (read in full...)
Can someone explain her behaviour to me?
Q. Can anyone give me some advice in regards to this girls behavior at the club last night? Okay , so I was with my friends last night at a club and I usually don't go to clubs but since it was my friends birthday I told myself I would make a ...
A. 28 May 2012: Don't be so worried about looking stupid. Taking a stance isn't stupid. It just shows you've got confidence. This episode shows you do not have confidence, unfortunately. You're too scared of looking stupid, too worried about how you "look" in front ... (read in full...)
Need some info and insight about having sex on a girl's period. Help?
Q. I'm in a real pickle about this one. My current girlfriend and I trust each other enough to have unprotected sex, and of course I get that feeling that I want to cum inside of her, although I can always control that urge. Me and her were talking ...
A. 27 May 2012: Having unprotected sex is a bad idea, and how much you trust each other is completely irrelevant. But, I am going to hope that this was just badly written, and what you actually mean is that you ARE protected, by birth control pills, or other forms ... (read in full...)
Is there a chance that a virgin won't bleed on her first sex?
Q. I just had sex with a girl, younger than my age. She claims that she has never done anything like that before and was REALLY innocent on our first try, so do I. I know nothing in making a distinction between the virgin one and the experienced one. ...
A. 27 May 2012: Not all virgins bleed. You should trust her! It is a not true that all virgins bleed their first time. I didn't bleed my first time either. However, I did bleed another time I had sex, years later, because my boyfriend at the time had a very thick ... (read in full...)
Can someone explain her behaviour to me?
Q. Can anyone give me some advice in regards to this girls behavior at the club last night? Okay , so I was with my friends last night at a club and I usually don't go to clubs but since it was my friends birthday I told myself I would make a ...
A. 27 May 2012: Why didn't you greet her then if you usually give each other a nod? It's one thing that you didn't go over to say hi, but you don't say if you even gave her a nod. In either case, next time attack the bull by it's horns. This means that you should ... (read in full...)
Bad sore throat after a bj
Q. My boyfriend is clean, and we know that for sure. Him and I had our first experience together, and I gave him a blow job. When I was doing it, all went well, except he started to push my head down a little farther, which resulted in me starting to ...
A. 27 May 2012: Tell your boyfriend to not push your head again when you give him oral sex. It's really something he shouldn't do, it is rude to do that. Unless you asked him to, and you enjoy it, a man should not push or hold your head during this act. You're the ... (read in full...)
Can someone explain her behaviour to me?
Q. Can anyone give me some advice in regards to this girls behavior at the club last night? Okay , so I was with my friends last night at a club and I usually don't go to clubs but since it was my friends birthday I told myself I would make a ...
A. 27 May 2012: Maybe because you ignored her and didn't say hi to her. I mean you looked at her, she knew you saw her, yet you didn't wave, smile at her, or say hi to her. You ignored her. So maybe that's why she wanted to give you a taste of your own medicine and ... (read in full...)
Why are people so upset by the fact that I cant drive?
Q. For the longest time i have been fearful of the art of driving. as a teen i was never excited to get my drivers licensee like everyone else. I have always been baffled how people could go through life driving and ultimately putting there lives in ...
A. 26 May 2012: The American society is build up around the car. That's why people are getting on your back about it. Because you are dependent on a car, and the ability to drive it, when you live in a society built around the car. People don't take buses, or walk. ... (read in full...)
Is it common for an uninterested married man to get hit on in a bar?
Q. OMG I am married and I got hit on at a bar today. It felt awful plus I had to chug a really expensive, very very good beer! This has never happened to me before but I don't go to bars very much. Is this common, to hit on guys that are wearing...
A. 26 May 2012: Sure it happens, is everyone backed off people who were married there would be no cheating wives or husbands...
If you get hit on you say "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude, but I actually want to sit by myself and read the news on my phone". ... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 26 May 2012: You can't say no girl wants you though until you've asked them all. There's only ONE way to find out what girls you have a chance with, and that's trying!... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 25 May 2012: "Since I started reading you guys' responses I've decided I can't date anyone who's similar in any way to my exes, I can't date anyone not in my age range, I can't date anyone who's not a virgin, and I can't date anyone who I have too much in common ... (read in full...)
Will sucking her breasts increase the size?
Q. Does male sucking females breasts enlarge her breasts or its doesnt affect size of her breasts??...
A. 25 May 2012: It doesn't affect the size of her breasts, but it's a great way to feel like your breasts are amazing. ... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 25 May 2012: You're still a kid. The real world hasn't started for you just yet. Wait until you get out of high school, or first years of college or wherever you are. Get a real job in the real world where you are surrounded by adults, and not teenagers, and ... (read in full...)
Is it a turn off/negative thing for a male to be a virgin?
Q. Hello. Is there a limit on how long you should be a virgin? I'm a male, turning later this year. I've never had intercourse before! What worries me is if that will put off a potential partner down the road? I'm not sure if that's a negative ...
A. 25 May 2012: Lack of experience in the bedroom is not a turn off. At least not for me. My ex was a virgin at 24, and he's the best I ever had in bed. I mean the first time we had sex was mind-blowing, and that was his first time ever. When you love each other ... (read in full...)
Why do so many women want to try having sex with a big penis if size doesn't matter?
Q. Why do so many women want to try having sex with a big penis (like bigger than they've ever had before) if size doesn't matter? Why did men evolve big penises (length and girth) compared to other primates if size doesn't matter?...
A. 25 May 2012: .. I didn't know we wanted to try and have sex with the biggest penis ever. I don't. I did end up in bed one time with a man who had a HUGE one. I didn't know about that though when I brought him home. And it was interesting, as it is with all new ... (read in full...)
Wife and I have been married 10 years. Should we throw out photos of our exs?
Q. My wife and I have been together for over 10 years but have just had some old possessions dropped off at our house by our parents / parents in law. Funny timing that they all dropped off boxes at about the same time. A lot of this is stuff fr...
A. 25 May 2012: I don't think it's inappropriate to have pictures of your exes. They were just people after all. The pictures don't hold magic powers that enchants the one looking at it into falling in love with their ex. A picture isn't magical, nor is the memory, ... (read in full...)
Why do guys have to give up their porn but girls get to keep their toys?
Q. So I've been reading post about women upset about their boyfriends using porn and post about guys upset about their girlfriends using a vibrator. It strikes me odd at the double standard women have for vibrators and porn. Every post I read consist ...
A. 25 May 2012: "In a couple of years men will no longer need women except for procreation because if robotic keep s on moving forward then soon sex robots will be on the open market. Then women will hate men even more and find something to complain about these new ... (read in full...)
Is it bad that a boyfriend asks her girlfriend to cook?
Q. I have a problem. I have a girlfriend of 2 years and 5 months and you see, she has a friend who has a boyfriend. Well I use to have a crush on her and now that I see her with him...it gets me jealous. I mean she let's me be 'Me' compared to my ...
A. 24 May 2012: I don't think you can expect things, like her cooking. But you can be happy if it happens, and show appreciation when it happens. You can also say that you like "wifey" girlfriends who do this sort of thing. Or wait and see if maybe this will come ... (read in full...)
My mom found out I'm sexually active
Q. My mom found out that I have sex with my bf My bf n I are twenty years old. She is so mad I don't understand why if I'm using protection n I'm not pregnant ...
A. 24 May 2012: Do you still live at home? Maybe it's time to move out then. Is she religious? If so then she is angry with you because you and your boyfriend are having sex before marriage. ... (read in full...)
Why do guys have to give up their porn but girls get to keep their toys?
Q. So I've been reading post about women upset about their boyfriends using porn and post about guys upset about their girlfriends using a vibrator. It strikes me odd at the double standard women have for vibrators and porn. Every post I read consist ...
A. 24 May 2012: "Look OP, most of us guys know full well that male sex toys are pretty crap and women get by far the better deal there."
I have to disagree. Vibrators are vibrators, and they can get you there. But if a man was able to bring us there it's always t... (read in full...)
I think I am the reason for many of the problems in my girlfriend's life
Q. I've been dating this girl for a few months and I am worried I am the reason for all her problems. We get along great and have lots of fun together but everyone makes comments on the fact that we are so opposite of each other. And its true we could...
A. 24 May 2012: But... you're not the one causing drama. Her dad is. If anyone should feel bad it should be her dad, who is the one putting this pressure on her, nagging on her, making things difficult for her. You're not the one causing the problems... Why can't ... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 24 May 2012: Virginity isn't a curse, lol. If so then we're all cursed, because we've all been virgins.
Get a bit thicker skinned, that's what you need. Stop being so easily influenced that you will let others dictate how you should feel and what you should d... (read in full...)
How important is relationship experience when choosing a partner?
Q. I wonder, how important is dating or relationship experience when choosing a partner? Does someone need to have relationship experience for you to consider them a viable partner? How do you view inexperience or someone with little relationship...
A. 23 May 2012: These are my personal answers, not universally correct answers...:
I wonder, how important is dating or relationship experience when choosing a partner?
Very important. It is from relationship experience that you learn what to look for, and wha... (read in full...)
I think I am the reason for many of the problems in my girlfriend's life
Q. I've been dating this girl for a few months and I am worried I am the reason for all her problems. We get along great and have lots of fun together but everyone makes comments on the fact that we are so opposite of each other. And its true we could...
A. 23 May 2012: I think you'd make it difficult for her if you left her. Then she'd still be the girl who didn't get her fathers approval, but she'd also be the girls who's father drove her boyfriend away. Not much fun.
Stick around unless this becomes too much... (read in full...)
How do porn actress do things with no health risks?
Q. How do porn actresses do things like a2m and rimjobs without any health risks? And how do they prep for anal to make it look so easy?...
A. 23 May 2012: They do it without health risk by getting tested, and having their co-players tested as well, of course. That's the only way to do it safely. Now, I don't know if they do test all the time, but those who want to be safe will have to get tested.
... (read in full...)
He can't move on after our one night stand. Help!
Q. Hello there, I wanted to ask help to solve this problem that i have. 4 years ago im working in a department store when i met this guy. At our first meeting he ask for my number. And because of my co-workers that are teasing me i don't have any ...
A. 23 May 2012: The problem is not hard to fix. You don't want to be his girlfriend, and you don't really know him. You had casual sex with him on two occasions, but didn't like it, and don't want to do it again. He is not a friend of yours, and you are not under ... (read in full...)
Why couldn't I get Mr. Happy to be happy?
Q. Ok, so hopefully i won't get too much stick for this... I have been seeing my girlfriend for 5 weeks, she is smoking hot and we sleep together everyday, sometimes 2, 3 times a day. I have never had a problem getting turned on and she loves it how...
A. 23 May 2012: It happens from time to time I guess. I wouldn't be too worried about this. ... (read in full...)
What type of porn would he like?
Q. my partner and I both enjoy watching porn but we don't do it together, I know what I like but would like to know what most men would like to watch. Due to him being a tight arse and refusing to get a new phone where he could view and download ...
A. 23 May 2012: Most men are not your man.. like SVC said. You need to ask your man what he wants, because this depends on him and his preferences, and not his gender.
I know some men are into girl on girl. I know some who are into guy on guy, even when they are... (read in full...)
His lack of kissing skills mean I lack .... well, read the rest, people!
Q. My bf's never really been a good kisser. I like real french kisses with a lot of tongue action and that's what really gets me going down there (meaning i get wet with a long passionate french kiss.). When he kisses me, it's a lot of kisses on the ...
A. 23 May 2012: Does he have a nostril problem that prevents him from breathing through his nose? If not, hold your lips on his in a peck, freeze the position, and see how long he can hold his breath before he starts to breathe with his nose.
And then be vocal... (read in full...)
Can you really be attracted to someone by their scent or is it just lust?
Q. Is it possible for 2 people to be attracted by their scent, or by their odor? I met this chick about 2 months ago and we really like each other, almost as if we're in love. This chick told me not too long ago that the first thing that attracted her ...
A. 23 May 2012: What difference does it make really? You're into her (for whatever reason) and she is into you. That's usually good. A lot more of how we react and think is based on instincts than we like to admit. "Loving" someone is not detached from instincts. ... (read in full...)
Is there a way to break my hymen without pain?
Q. Hi in 17 and me and my boyfriend want to try having sex. I have read about all the diseases and things and no the risks and we will be careful, what I'm really worried about is my hymen. My older sister had sex and said it hurt really bad. I'm ...
A. 23 May 2012: In my experience it isn't really the breaking of the hymen that hurts. What hurts is that your vagina is being stretched out. Often, with "beginners" or those who are too eager, the penis is pushed in too hard. This cause friction, a sort of burning ... (read in full...)
Why is it ok to be a virgin at 18?
Q. If I'm a virgin at 18, why do people say it's okay? I know for a fact that all those numbers people come up with about how many people lie about having sex is complete crap. There are more people around me who either have kids that are 2 or 3, or ...
A. 23 May 2012: Why exactly does you being a virgin but you BENEATH some people who get dragged to court over custody issues...
You really don't know your blessing, do you? This is just complaints about wanting what you don't have. Blonds want to be brunette... (read in full...)
Can I hear from some women whose husband are either in the military or they are fireman?
Q. I need advice from ladies whose boyfriends or husbands are in the army! My boyfriend is considering a career either in the army or as a fireman although I think he would prefer the former. While I am supportive of whatever choice he makes, I can't ...
A. 23 May 2012: It is by far more dangerous to drive a car than it is to join the army. A life in a boring office job will not make him immortal you know. He could die just as quickly as he could if he works in the army, if he happens to drive to and from work.
... (read in full...)
Caught my boyfriend masturbating to porn 4 hours after I gave him oral. Does that mean I didn't do it right?
Q. Okay so I went to go to sleep last night but my boyfriend stayed up. I was playing games on my phone because i couldn't quite fall asleep. I decided i would smoke a cigarette before i finally decided to sleep. I realized that I didn't have a ...
A. 22 May 2012: I'm glad you asked him. If I were you I'd take his answer as it is and not try to read anything more into it. I'm not a guy, but my experience with men has shown me they usually tell it to you as it is.
Besides, who said you can't get horny mo... (read in full...)
Ladies: I have some dating queries, please let me know what you think
Q. Hi, this is a post for the ladies (guys can def help too). I'm a guy and have been meeting the odd female here and there but I never actually get a formal relationship out of any of them. So I have been thinking of what may be the problem. It i...
A. 22 May 2012: Don't get hung up on rules. Be casual and meet her on a level where you feel comfortable. After all, you want to find someone who will like you for you, not someone who you need to buy expensive things to impress.
I found that a guy makes a ... (read in full...)
I'm immature and everyone hates me!
Q. I am 15 years old and I feel like I am immature. I am very talkative and annoying. It seems like everyone hates me because of it. How can I be more mature? Thanks :)...
A. 22 May 2012: Who are the ones who "hate" you? Old and mature people? Or kids your own age?
If your mother is telling you to mature, then I'd take her word for it and start acting more like an adult. Find a role model that you can look up to an mimic.
Howe... (read in full...)
Why do guys have to give up their porn but girls get to keep their toys?
Q. So I've been reading post about women upset about their boyfriends using porn and post about guys upset about their girlfriends using a vibrator. It strikes me odd at the double standard women have for vibrators and porn. Every post I read consist ...
A. 22 May 2012: You sort of also see men who get defensive and protective of their porn collection... So this goes both ways.
I think what is important to know here is that a woman who is against porn in all likelihood is NOT an owner of a toy. She is probably... (read in full...)
My boyfriend constantly talks about himself and has no interest in me
Q. My boyfriend seems to only talk about himself, there's the usual conversation of him asking me how I am, what I've been up to and that'll be it, he'll start to ramble on about his ridiculously large collection of games, or his passion for the ...
A. 22 May 2012: Tell him he is boring.
I don't know, how interested are you in him? Is he worthwhile? Does he give anything in the relationship otherwise? I mean, maybe he does other things for you that means you can put up with this. If he calls you often fo... (read in full...)
My wife had sex with 10 guys by the time she was 19 Is that normal?
Q. I am 35 and my wife is 34, and she has had sex with 11 men in her life including me. That might not sound like a massive number of partners relative to her age, but the other 10 guys were all between the ages of 15-19. From 19-30 she was with one ...
A. 22 May 2012: ""Part of what is hurting you is the same thing that hurts me, she gave something so special away so cheaply to guys that took advantage of her""
This is why it is so hard for you to imagine a woman having an interest in sex. A woman enjoying... (read in full...)
My boyfriend made a girl pregnant then 2 weeks later he made me pregnant, what do I do or how to handle this situation
Q. my boyfriend went out of the country a year ago,school related cheated on me but denied it, rumor has it he got the girl pregnant. now this girl is also known to be a hoe, so should i believe him or the pple that think she is right but they also ...
A. 22 May 2012: I am glad you told him. Keeping it inside yourself is also stressful you know, and now the weight is off your shoulders and you can focus on yourself and your baby full time rather than spend hours and nights thinking about him and the other girl. ... (read in full...)
Should I pay my children's' father's debt?
Q. My grandma passed away in march, it still brings tears to my eyes just thinking about her. However she was 95 and was able to be in her own home which is better than other ways. I was surprised to get a summons as she left something for my children ...
A. 21 May 2012: Ask him if it is fair that you give him money as if you and him are married, when you in fact are not? Tell him that when he is ready to make a commitment to you you will share money together as a married couple. But until then he, and his debt, are ... (read in full...)
My wife had sex with 10 guys by the time she was 19 Is that normal?
Q. I am 35 and my wife is 34, and she has had sex with 11 men in her life including me. That might not sound like a massive number of partners relative to her age, but the other 10 guys were all between the ages of 15-19. From 19-30 she was with one ...
A. 19 May 2012: Sorry, didn't see your follow-up until after I posted. I'll respond now to your follow-up question.
"She was with her first bf from 15-17, and when they broke up she had sex with all those other guys because she "still needed sex but didn't w... (read in full...)
My wife had sex with 10 guys by the time she was 19 Is that normal?
Q. I am 35 and my wife is 34, and she has had sex with 11 men in her life including me. That might not sound like a massive number of partners relative to her age, but the other 10 guys were all between the ages of 15-19. From 19-30 she was with one ...
A. 19 May 2012: What if we said it was not normal? Would you send your wife to a mental institution then? Or are you looking for backup so you can lash out at her, be cruel to her, and call her names, tell her she is not normal and how bad she is and how you can't ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend made a girl pregnant then 2 weeks later he made me pregnant, what do I do or how to handle this situation
Q. my boyfriend went out of the country a year ago,school related cheated on me but denied it, rumor has it he got the girl pregnant. now this girl is also known to be a hoe, so should i believe him or the pple that think she is right but they also ...
A. 19 May 2012: So what you are asking is if love is worth accepting a man who cheated on you and will have a baby with another woman, and hasn't even told you about any of this yet?
You need to have a talk with him. It is one thing if he cheated, told you, and... (read in full...)
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