A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend seems to only talk about himself, there's the usual conversation of him asking me how I am, what I've been up to and that'll be it, he'll start to ramble on about his ridiculously large collection of games, or his passion for the Japanese language and manga/anime - he'll literally throw out a Japanese word mid-conversation for no reason and expects me to understand it! So far I have tolerated it, didn't really bother me much at first and I made the effort to take an interest and support him.But recently he's not been shutting up about how he's going the gym everyday and building his muscles up, how he can take a guy out with one punch, how he worked out for 4 hours straight!It is driving me insane!! We don't talk about anything else! As soon as he stops talking about all that, the conversation stops dead. I try talking about other things and he'll be completely unmotivated to continue conversing.I've tried steering the converstation on to things I enjoy i.e if he says a Japanese word, I'll say a French word because I love the French and he'll shoot me down telling me he has no interest in French, only his Japanese and his games...I don't know what to do, we've only been going out a short while.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2012): "I don't know what to do, we've only been going out a short while."
Only one thing you can do. Break up. Weed him out and move on, that's what dating's all about.
You don't enjoy being with him, he's not interested in you, only himself, that's who he is. He's not going to change.
A
female
reader, Read-the-signs +, writes (22 May 2012):
Get a new boyfriend.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (22 May 2012):
 Tell him he is boring.
I don't know, how interested are you in him? Is he worthwhile? Does he give anything in the relationship otherwise? I mean, maybe he does other things for you that means you can put up with this. If he calls you often for example, stays in touch, if he is eager to do things with you (not just talk, but go places, see movies, do activities).
Does he get along with your family, are you having fun with him, does he make you smile?
This excessive focus on himself could be temporarily, but to be honest I think he rambles on like this for one of two possible reasons:
1. You are quiet and don't speak up often enough. You shut down when he starts to talk, rather than try to out-voice him. It sounds like he could need some competition and a girl who has so much going on in her life that she will constantly speak about herself as well, rather than sit back and wait for him to ask about her. If so, you need to speak up, take action, and be more passionate in your own life to match his passion for his own life. He doesn't need your "support", he already loves his life. However, if I am right, he isn't the type to ask how you are doing. He is the type that waits for you to TELL HIM how you are doing and make him shut up with interesting (or interesting to you at least) stories from your own life.
2. He is self centered and only cares for his own reflection in the mirror. This could be periodic though, once he gets his work-out routine into a routine more than a "new" thing he is doing, the excitement to talk about it will wear off. Or, it could get worse if he grows into a self-loving guy who just wants to stare at his own reflection and be amazed with himself.
Either way.. there is nothing wrong in being excited about your own life. If you aren't as interested, take charge and talk about things you find interesting, or do interesting things with him rather than talk. Or dump him if this becomes too much of a drag for you.
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (22 May 2012):
 Hon, sounds like your are not into him anymore. Since you say you have only been going out for a short while, why dont you chalk this one up to experience and move on with your life?
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A
male
reader, jasonvpn  +, writes (22 May 2012):
Why are you with this guy? He doesn't seem to appreciate you.
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