A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I wonder, how important is dating or relationship experience when choosing a partner?Does someone need to have relationship experience for you to consider them a viable partner? How do you view inexperience or someone with little relationship history? Does your perception of their relationship history depend on age?Do you view someone much differently if they have much less experience than you do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2012): well, not having much relationship experience can be both good and bad. A lot of people get messed up, develop bad habits, and have a emotional/psychological baggage (which gets dumped on you) because of their previous (bad) relationship experiences. They might then be a bad partner to you because they've been scarred by their previous relationship experiences.on the other hand, people can also be better partners to you because they have learned from their previous bad relationships.So to me, in the end it's neither good nor bad if someone does or does not have much past relationship experience. What counts is the present, and how it is dealt with. If you're with someone and they are lying, cheating, treating you badly - they can do that regardless of whether they have a lot of relationship experience or none at all. similarly, you can be with a great partner who will make your life very enjoyable, again this can happen regardless of whether they have a lot or little relationship experience.
A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (24 May 2012):
Well these questions can produce endless answers because sometimes you can even get those answers where people actually do the opposite. The important thing is to decide for yourself, the answers to these questions, at the same time understanding that there is no right or wrong answer as everyone is different but generally relationships can be the same.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2012): ""I wonder, how important is dating or relationship experience when choosing a partner?""Depends on the age...in your age range, I would not put a whole lot of weight on it, but I would take the time to really get to know the person if they have never been in a relationship before. You have to start somewhere.""Does someone need to have relationship experience for you to consider them a viable partner?""At my age? Absolutely. I am in my forties and if a guy has not had any relationship experiences, we are surely going to have a problem, almost guaranteed. I probably would not even go there.""How do you view inexperience or someone with little relationship history?"" Red flags and realizations...questions that go through my mind: They are a player, they cannot commit to one partner, they are gay and haven't admitted it yet, they are not ready to settle down with one person.""Does your perception of their relationship history depend on age?""Yes, very much so. With age, comes experience. When we get to that age of looking for a potential partner in life, we create these "lists" of what we are looking for, but as you get older and have more experiences in relationships, the lists goes from "what I am looking for" to "deal breakers" - what I will not accept, what is something (whether it be an undesirable behavior or a undesirable character trait) I cannot have in my life. These are things you cannot possibly know until you have some experience with them, good or bad and what you decide to do with them...again... with age, comes experience :-)""Do you view someone much differently if they have much less experience than you do?"Sure, but not necessarily in a negative way for everyone...if we are not on the same page, we do not share many typical relationship experiences, he has not learned anything from his past relationships and continues doing the same things, well, I am too old to enlighten this person at that stage of his life...he's surely set in his ways...next lol.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (23 May 2012):
 These are my personal answers, not universally correct answers...:
I wonder, how important is dating or relationship experience when choosing a partner?
Very important. It is from relationship experience that you learn what to look for, and what you need from a relationship, and who will be able to give that to you.
Does someone need to have relationship experience for you to consider them a viable partner?
Partially yes. If I am madly in love I will probably not care. But if I am just dating then I wouldn't date someone who does not have relationship experience.
How do you view inexperience or someone with little relationship history?
As just that. Not having relationship history. It doesn't imply that they are immature, or selfish, or anything. All it means is that they don't have experience with relationships, and don't know much about being in one. When you look for someone to work at your company you want the one who has the right qualities, right? You don't want someone who's got no experience. The heart is important to protect, you want to give it to someone who knows best how to care for it.
Does your perception of their relationship history depend on age?
Yes.
Do you view someone much differently if they have much less experience than you do?
Not really, unless there are obvious and blatant differences.
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A
female
reader, StarryEyes101 +, writes (23 May 2012):
 Nobody really cares about experience. Actually I think your future relationships, if they get serious, would be more pleased if their partner has less experience. It makes them worry less if they have to contend with a jealous ex or something. I wouldn't view anyone differently if they had little or no experience.
Hope this helps :)
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (23 May 2012):
 Little experience (read: "a virgin") is the Holy Grail of EVERY GUYS' search for a girl/woman!!!.....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2012): Does he NEED relationship experience? No. Not with me, anyway.
If a guy has little to no relationship history, to me, at this point, it's cute. The guys I'm interested in are in their early 20's, so if they haven't had a relationship yet, it's no big deal to me. If we're exclusive, and I'm his first girlfriend, I see it as flattering.
Yes, this perception WOULD change with age. If a man, is over 30, and has never been in a relationship, that would be a red flag to me. It'd tell me that either he's chronically shy, has problems with commitment or control, or SOMETHING, and that's why he's never had a solid relationship.
If he has less sexual experience, it's ok, as long as he doesnt get all self-conscious about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2012): "I wonder, how important is dating or relationship experience when choosing a partner?"
100% unimportant in comparison to other things.
"Does someone need to have relationship experience for you to consider them a viable partner?"
Nope.
"How do you view inexperience or someone with little relationship history?"
It's fine, I don't view it as anything.
"Does your perception of their relationship history depend on age?"
Nope, some people are late bloomers but when they do bloom they can make great partners.
"Do you view someone much differently if they have much less experience than you do?"
Nope, because my vast experience has thought me it doesn't actually matter.
Every person is a new animal OP. I've dated women who were very experienced yet totally inept in bed, or they had a horrible history of poisonous relationships, or they continually cheated, or they consistently fucked people over, or they were incredibly insecure and used guys to try and fix them, or they only dated guy for material benefits, the list goes on OP.
Experience doesn't have any baring on a person's worth as a partner and anyone who thinks it does is not really worth having as a partner because a wise person judges others on their individual merits and not some preconceived misconceptions.
There are people who think it's important, but some people think red hair is important or big boobs. It's nothing personal but some people do prefer more experienced people.
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A
female
reader, agneeman  +, writes (23 May 2012):
 honestly, I'd actually feel better with some one who doesnt have baggage or some one else to compare me to or that they could still have strong feelings for.
That said, if by little relationship experience you mean 'plenty of flinging experience' that would make me too insecure for words...
So yeah, in the first instance, little relationship experience is positive.
But in the second instance, not.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (23 May 2012):
 I guess in my experience men who have had a few relationships tend to know what their looking for more defined. Someone who is knew to relationships sometimes dont know what to expect or quite know how some things are. i wouldn't say that not having experience doesnt make you the perfect or a good partner. I find that they dont know what they want and tend to not notice the little things. For some people they find someone their attracted to then they see if they have chemistry and also their is their charm, intelligence so forth etc. Relationships are far from easy and are far more complicated than they should be lol. Nothing is perfect and their is no good or bad answer when it comes to dating or relationships everyone is different and just because you have very little dating or relationship experience doesnt make you undesirable. If you want love you cannot wait for it to drop in your lap it doesnt work that way you have to fight for what you want and if its something you dont want then you have to make those choices and decisions, no matter how tough or difficult they seem to be. follow your heart its usually the best way to go. hope this helps aphex xx
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (23 May 2012):
 I don't think that it should matter if someone has lots of experience or not. At the end of the day everybody is different in there own way, they may not have a lot of relationship experience but it does not mean that they would make any less of a good partner than someone who has had lots of experience.
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