Should I stay with my best friend/boyfriend? Or end things?
Q. Hello, I am a 21 year old female and have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years. When I first met him, we had a wonderful relationship...about 8 months into it, he started drifting away. He wanted to spend more time with his friends and not ...
A. 25 January 2013: WE guys who claim to be "thrifty" (read: "we're cheap") do this, something, which is interesting:
In order to save the price of gifts at Christmas and Valentine's Day, we do a "light" break-up with our G/Fs just before Christmas. AND, we intend t... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend controlling or normal?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for just 4 months now but we have been seeing eachother since last July. He is honestly, the most caring, loving, gentle man I have ever come across ( and I am not saying that because he is my boyfriend ). I have just ...
A. 25 January 2013: The guy you've described - and his behaviour - is rather "over the top." I would attribute it to both his immaturity AND his prediliction to control.... In my view, EITHER is reason enough to give you pause.... BUT, his exhibiting BOTH ... (read in full...)
Should I forgive my guy friend for sleeping with my then girlfriend?
Q. I am not completely sure how forgiveness works. I don't know when to let go of something, or to hold onto it -- I either do or I don't, and that is that. I have a question about forgiving and forgetting. To ask it, I feel I should give the story ...
A. 25 January 2013: The combinations of friends/sex/love are much like matches and gasoline... As long as all are handled safely - and let's assume that everybody knows what "safely" means - then all is well....
HOWEVER, there ARE combinations that are less-saf... (read in full...)
What do I wear?
Q. Basically I'm going out for a get together with this boy for what I know it's not a date it's just close friends getting together but I quite like him more than a friend. So I'm over thinking on how to dress and how to do my make up choice? Do I g...
A. 24 January 2013: Here's the only hint I can offer about what we guys think about how a woman dresses......
IF you wear tight slacks or a tight-fitting skirt... the guys will be looking for "panty line".... to see IF you are wearing undies....
Otherwise, ju... (read in full...)
I've regained all my feelings for him again. How do I tell him this?
Q. So , When I Was 15 I Was In A Relationship With This Guy Who Was Also The Same Age As Me . After Three Months Of Being Together , We Broke Up . But After Several Months Of Not Talking He Decided To Text Me . So We Been Texting For About A Year...
A. 24 January 2013: Will you be graduating from high school this Spring?... (read in full...)
Why cant my boyfriend tell me that he loves me?
Q. i have been going out with my boyfriend for 21 months hes 45 I'm 44 I'm divorced, he never married no kids. Last year after a scuffle and a very emotional deep conversation he mentioned that the only reason he never said I love you is because he ...
A. 24 January 2013: I'm not quite in concurrance with my other Aunts and Uncles on this one.....
IF a partner refuses to say "I love you...."....and doesn't not do something/anything to exhibit that they love you... then you may reasonably conclude that they DON'T lo... (read in full...)
I'm almost sure b/f cheated but he's saying I did and gave him a STD!
Q. So I'll try to make this short, I have been dating this guy for about a year and a half and we have had a tough time, there hasn't been any cheating as far as I know, except the one time about six months ago I caught him exchanging naked pics with ...
A. 24 January 2013: This is 'way too much drama.... and no "relationship" is worth this level of vitriole and anguish....
Dump him... get yourself tested, AGAIN!, to be sure that you haven't contracted anything that needs treatment (or CAN'T be treated!... (read in full...)
How do I help someone get better at their hobby without being perceived as critical?
Q. I have a friend who is just starting (a year ago) to get into a hobby that I have practiced since I was a kid. I am 39 now so it's been over 30 years since I started. A lot of things are not going right for her and she asks me for advice. ...
A. 24 January 2013: Sometimes,... it's the DELIVERY of the advice/criticism which is so hard to hear....
I've begun dating a lady who is a very good - and advanced - bridge player. When I began replaying the game - again, after about 30 years - she was frustrat... (read in full...)
I can't commit to someone else because I'm in love with a married man
Q. I have been in contact with a married man with two older children since 2009 . We chatted for about 6 months before i let him in my life. We got serious and within 3 weeks his wife found out . He called if off. I was gutted , he would avoid me at ...
A. 24 January 2013: I'm sorry for you.... Several Aunts and Uncles have already posted wise advice to you before I'm submitting this. It is heartbreaking to "see" a person set themselves up for the long-term anguish such as you are doing.....
Married men who have... (read in full...)
Why does my husband watch one particular part of my body during sex?
Q. Hi, I am really embarrassed but here it goes: sex with my husband is over the top. I mean, since I've been with him I finally understood what "to make love" means: he's caring and sentimental in the bedroom and outside the bedroom too. When he is ...
A. 24 January 2013: I'd say that that (what he's watching) is a darn-site better than him watching a re-run of a "Jerry Springer" episode whilest you and he are getting it on....
Have fun....... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is cold and distant, and goes quiet for weeks at a time! How can I let him go?
Q. My boyfriend of two years is distant, cold, doesn't call or text for 3 weeks now because of something I said but I apologised. I think he's always finding faults in me, even the tiniest. I think its rather childish, he always does this, he goes qui...
A. 24 January 2013: P.S. Don't discard those undies....'cuz there's always the chance that one of us idiot guys in gonna behave this very same way again, in the future.... and you'll need to go through that exorcism that I described earlier....
Good luck, again...... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is cold and distant, and goes quiet for weeks at a time! How can I let him go?
Q. My boyfriend of two years is distant, cold, doesn't call or text for 3 weeks now because of something I said but I apologised. I think he's always finding faults in me, even the tiniest. I think its rather childish, he always does this, he goes qui...
A. 24 January 2013:
This is easy.... You pick out a pair of panties... and label them your "big girl" panties.... and put them on.
Then, you puff out your chest and say to yourself... WHAT could there possibly be, for me, in this dysfunctional relationship... (read in full...)
There's a rumour that my boyfriend slept with his aunt (uncle's ex wife) - who should I believe?
Q. There's been a rumor that years ago my boyfriend of 2 years has slept with his aunt multiple times. His aunt is divorced from his uncle, she was only related by marriage. He tells me this is just a rumor, that he would never sleep with his aunt. I...
A. 24 January 2013: How old is this boyfriend? .... and his "aunt"????
This is great theater... and I hope the dialogue goes on long enough to get real sordid.....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Do men like the feeling of coming inside a woman?
Q. Hello I have a question for you guys.. Do men like the feeling when they ejaculate inside of a female? I'm just curious...
A. 24 January 2013:
For a guy, the feeling is like Nirvana.. only, BETTER ...
Why do you ask?
... (read in full...)
Can anyone give me any hot make out advice?
Q. Hello everyone, I'm a 17 year old girl. I have a party coming up and my crush is going to be there and something tells me there's going to be some action. Does anyone have any hot make out advice that guys like, but nothing too dirty cause it's...
A. 24 January 2013: If I gave you an "honest" and a "guy" answer, I would probably end up before a judge, 'splaining why a guy of my advanced years is saying all sorts of sordid stuff to a young girl like you... Sooooooo,
.... you really have to put this question... (read in full...)
How important is oral sex?
Q. The basic question here is how important is oral sex to you? I'm aiming this at both genders just to get an overview from both sides. I've been with some people who absolutely love oral and others who aren't really that interested in it and i'd li...
A. 24 January 2013: The interesting thing about "sex" things is that there are oodles of replies.... from across the spectrum.... and nobody who tells you that they have "your answer" can really be certain that they're correct....
The ANSWER is: Oral sex.... ... (read in full...)
Are these the signs of an abusive relationship or am I being paranoid?
Q. I am a little worried about the relationship I have with my boyfriend, but I don’t know if I am being paranoid or not. A few years ago I was in an abusive relationship. My instinct at the time told me to get out, but I didn’t and I got hurt. ...
A. 24 January 2013: IF your submittal accurately reflects things that have happened between you and this guy.... then, yes, you are viewing the beginning of an abusive "relationship"....
Why wait to find out how bad it will get? Get out now and spare yourself... (read in full...)
I want to get married but my partner's been married twice before and doesn't think he wants to marry me!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for going on 2 years. He recently told me that he loved me but wasn't in love with me. But he wanted to be. He said that he wanted to work on things. He stayed. Now he says that he loves me. And he is glad that he ...
A. 24 January 2013: Dump this confused idiot and find an idiot who is not so confused.....
Good luck........ (read in full...)
Whats a fair amount for boyfriend to pay if he moves in?
Q. My boyfriend and i have been together for 4 years. We are both late 20s. Lately we have been talking about moving in together. i have my own place and he still lives at home. Its not the best time to try and sell my house with out loosing money (he ...
A. 23 January 2013: You write: "...any advice would be great."
Surprisingly, this is an easy inquiry for giving advice. That advice is: DON'T ALLOW HIM TO MOVE IN TO YOUR ADDRESS.... The ONLY thing that that changes (from your's and his current status) is that,... (read in full...)
We are married but separated and husband has signed up for dating site. What steps do I take now?
Q. Hello I've had problems since I married and moved in together (been married 2 years. We have taken a 'break' where he has moved out. I find im a happier on my own, no stress of arguing about how much he drinks each evening, him not going to bed...
A. 23 January 2013: You write: "But dont know what step to take next... "
Let me help..... GO TO A VERY NASTY DIVORCE ATTORNEY and get things started......
Good luck....... (read in full...)
How can I get rid of my boyfriend's lying trouble making ex?
Q. My boyfriends ex lied about being pregnant and the baby being his as she cheated on him on 5 occasions with a friend of his. (Some people even disbelieve she was even pregnant as she was drinking and smoking the night after she apparently had blood ...
A. 23 January 2013: There's 'way too much drama here..... I can imagine just ONE way to handle it...
Show this submittal to your current B/F and ask him: "So, hunky-punky,.... are you - or are you NOT - the guy who knocked up this drama queen? Are you - or are y... (read in full...)
My ex keeps texting me wanting an explanation for why I broke up with him
Q. My ex boyfriend and I broke up October last year, but it was a long drawn out process of being off and on since April. He cheated on me back then and I still loved him but couldn't trust him, realised I needed some space. Eventually when we done ...
A. 23 January 2013: Read SVC's response..... Do you "get it?" If not, then read it, again and again, until you do (get it).....
Then, you can get on with your life....
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Gf sending dirty texts to another man
Q. Hi, I've been with my gf for nearly 3 years, it's had it's ups and downs but we've got through them, between us we have 4 children, she has 3 girls I have one boy. The two youngest girls dad left when the youngest was born, and hasn't been around ...
A. 23 January 2013: Yes. My advice is that this girl has a skewed view of what is proper.... has little or no concern for the wellbeing of her kids.... and has even LESS concern for YOU..... so.... the best you might decide to do is leave her to her own, sordid, ... (read in full...)
How do I get my partner to do more foreplay, and have sex more often?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles just a quick question. What do you do when you have a partner that wont do much or any foreplay. He will not do oral sex at all, not even once a year, he will kiss me before and during sex, I do have to intiate it most of the ...
A. 23 January 2013: I like how SVC outlined things..... listen to that...
As to masturbating more to compensate because you have a boorish spouse..... Remember, that your eyesight will suffer from that..... Take it from one who knows... My corrective lenses look lik... (read in full...)
What chemicals in our bodies allow us to detect who is the perfect lover for women and men?
Q. I am dating this one guy and once we made love it seems like something about us was a quick connection.Making love to this man was very intoxicating not in a sick way but it was very emotional he took me on a ride that I never wanted to end. I...
A. 22 January 2013: I find that if I put enough wine, vodka or scotch in to a woman's body, I will usually get a chance to see if I love her, later that evening......
P.S. It's not really a PERFECT method... but who would dispute that "love" is a fleeting and hard... (read in full...)
Do relationships develop from sleeping with someone you have just met?
Q. Do relationships develop from sex? I’ve always been the type of person who hasn't slept around and would never let myself be used by a fella for sex. By doing this I think I have kept men at arm’s length and therefore have never developed any long...
A. 22 January 2013: Sure, they can.
But it's about like saying, "Gee, I learned to ride a two-wheeled bicycle, today .... does that mean I'm likely to become an Indianapolis race car driver?"
The odds are better that you'll end up on the race track in Indiana... (read in full...)
My partner is constantly belittling my looks, my opinions and my intelligence.
Q. I love my partner and he loves me, but I dont feel like he appreciates me. I am an attractive lady and have always had a lot of male attention my whole life. I am now 36 yrs old and look probably 28 yrs old. Not that I am basing who I am off my ...
A. 22 January 2013: There is a serious inconsistency in your submittal.
Look at these to phrases:
"I love my partner and he loves me,...." and,
"....and is constantly belittling my looks, my opinions and my intelligence...."
ONE of those cannot be true..... (read in full...)
How do I get my partner to do more foreplay, and have sex more often?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles just a quick question. What do you do when you have a partner that wont do much or any foreplay. He will not do oral sex at all, not even once a year, he will kiss me before and during sex, I do have to intiate it most of the ...
A. 22 January 2013: This is a very tough question, because the guy you are describing has never learned that WOMEN HAVE FEELINGS.. and WOULD LIKE TO HAVE A NICE TIME WHEN THEY TAKE PART IN SEXUAL ACTIVITY, too ..... AND, that the World does NOT revolve around him (this ... (read in full...)
I need a break from him but I'm scared of breaking up our family, and worried what will happen if I decide I want him back....
Q. Hi I am 26 years old and my and my boyfriend (also the father of my daughter) have been together for 6 years we have a 2 year old daughter... Hes a great dad and we get along just fine... We dont aregue very often normally if he gets upset or mad he ...
A. 21 January 2013: It "sounds" to me as if you and he believe that silence is a (good) form of communication.
Note: It's not....
IF you and he wish to make your marriage successful - and strong - then grow up and learn to talk to one-another... a... (read in full...)
He says he still has his ex on his mind, but only when we fight! What does this mean?
Q. Hi, What do you do if your boyfriend of 6 months is saying he still has ex in his mind? If he is still in love with her then why does he give me headgames, why mess with me at all? He has showed jealousy, when other men check me out etc. Is he ...
A. 21 January 2013: You may stop being confused now.
This guy is a jerk, and is not worthy of your time/attention or mental energy...... Once you put him behind you, you may also put behind you all the questions that you posed here.... and you can get on with you... (read in full...)
Should I ask my friend for permission to sleep with her husband?
Q. Apologies for the length of this but I think it's important to have the details.. the devil is always in the details... Me: I'm single and approaching 50. It's been a few years since my last serious relationship but I'm fine with that. Having see...
A. 21 January 2013: IF you ask your woman-friend if you may use her hubby as your F-buddy.... there is a wide spectrum of reactions that you will get....
You'd love to hear, "Of course, have at it. He and I have opened up things between us.... and I'd actually... (read in full...)
How can I tell my boyfriend that he doesn't need to bring up his children in every conversation?
Q. I am a horrible person that has hurt ny boyfriend in the past. I have changed however and he can see that. He has kids to another girl that he only gets to.see every known and then. i feel like he still loves this girl no matter how much he tells me ...
A. 21 January 2013: OP: Your "re-submittal" shows that you aren't really interested in a "solution" or "answer" to the question that you posed.... but that, instead, you are quite content to be caught in your "Catch-22".
Good luck..... ... (read in full...)
Marriage is just about over but I still have questions ....
Q. It has been one month since I last wrote to this site. I can't say that a lot has happened until about two weeks ago... I sought out counselling finally! He is very supportive and listens to me. Right now I'm at a major intersection and...
A. 21 January 2013: I suggest that you focus on this, single, sentence in your submittal:
"We had a heart to heart talk that evening and she told me she was confused because she wanted to save the marriage but she didn't like my personality anymore and didn't w... (read in full...)
Dumped by a guy who I think is a sociopath. How can I get over him when I have to see him at school?
Q. I posted a question on here earlier about trying to get my ex back. We go to the same professional school in a class of less than 150 and I will be here for another two and a half years. To sum up the relationship: We started with something physic...
A. 21 January 2013: I suggest that you spend very little (more) time trying to (psycho-) analyze and categorize this guy... and 'way more time socializing with those in your circle who you like... whilest avoiding him (this guy).....
You have only so-much mental e... (read in full...)
Why did he come back to ignore me again?
Q. Hello, so me and my ex boyfriend broke up in 2010.. He had a gf as soon as we broke up but that didn't stop us from sleeping together.. We stopped talking for 8 months then he decided to email my cousin on facebook so she can give me his new number! ...
A. 21 January 2013: He sought you out to get back in to your life because he LIKES the s*x with you... AND you allow him to do so.
There is no question about what HE is up to. The only REAL question is: Do you want to continue to be his f**k friend? You (and ONL... (read in full...)
Am I too jealous of what my boyfriend watches?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 10 months. We are really close. He would never ever cheat on me. Yet I still have jealousy issues. I feel like my jealousy is severe. Like some other women, I don't like when my boyfriend watches TV because I know he ...
A. 21 January 2013: What you described in your submittal is not atypical.. but it IS rather extreme... and seems to "come from" your believing that you can - or should - control all that a/your partner does and sees. Is that really realistic? Would YOU want to be on ... (read in full...)
How do I get past the breakup and hearing the mean things that he said over and over in my head?
Q. I got into a relationship with a guy who I thought was great. It ended after 10 months. I've gotten over him I think. I would never get back with him, ever. And I don't miss him anymore. We ultimately broke up because he asked me to leave and go ...
A. 21 January 2013: When a person experiences a cut or abrasion or a burn, Mother Nature has arranged that their skin repairs itself, and scars over before too long. Unfortunately, she didn't make the same arrangement for the injuries that happen inside our ... (read in full...)
I can't cry. Is this normal after a break up?
Q. I can't cry. That might not seem like an issue to most people, but before I broke up with my boyfriend last year, I cried about everything. I always have. Every emotion I have used to get so overwhelming i'd cry. If i was really happy, slightly sad, ...
A. 21 January 2013: I think you've hit on an important question... which I would paraphrase as: "I've gotten SO DISTRAUGHT over this break-up that it seems to have overwhelmed my ability to exhibit distress by crying." Perhaps a medical person would validate for you ... (read in full...)
An affair that I never wanted to begin ended badly. I am shocked to the core at how he could do this to me!
Q. I understand that I will be judged for what I am about to ask, but please understand that nothing that can be said is comparable to the guilt and pain I am putting myself through. I had a male friend for about 2 years with whom I went to school. ...
A. 21 January 2013: We guys are curious - and conniving - creatures. Sometimes, even when we have a tolerable/good/great marriage or relationship, we just can't resist to "test the waters" and see if the grass isn't really greener in the next yard.... You were the ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't show me any affection. I've tried everything to improve myself. What else can I do?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half now. He's in the military and is divorced with 2 kids. After a year of long distance relationship, I decided to move in with him. I am having the hardest time not receiving affection ...
A. 20 January 2013: You must reconcile that he sucked you in to HIS life.... and, consequently, your gave up your's..... and now, he has all the power..... He gets to have s*x with you.... has no reason to be nice to you..... and probably will never be any ... (read in full...)
FWB tells me to "enjoy the moment", but the moment is now 18 months and one aborted pregnancy. What should I do?
Q. Am in an fb or fwb relationship for a year and half now. He is a coworker and friend who flirted a little with me. Because of my personal problems ie divorce, no final financial settlement and children now 8 and 4 entrusted to father by court I ...
A. 20 January 2013: It sounds to me like you are living your life around your sexuality...... That's a pretty shallow premise and base for determining what one does from day to day....
As to your submittal specifics: This guy KNOWS that you are ripe to be exploite... (read in full...)
How can I tell my boyfriend that he doesn't need to bring up his children in every conversation?
Q. I am a horrible person that has hurt ny boyfriend in the past. I have changed however and he can see that. He has kids to another girl that he only gets to.see every known and then. i feel like he still loves this girl no matter how much he tells me ...
A. 20 January 2013: Why spend any more time with this guy who irritates you?
You need only to be in his presence long enough to say, "You know, hunky-punky, I kind of like you... but I'm not dumb enough to stick with you whilest you figure out where you stand wi... (read in full...)
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