A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex boyfriend and I broke up October last year, but it was a long drawn out process of being off and on since April. He cheated on me back then and I still loved him but couldn't trust him, realised I needed some space. Eventually when we done nothing but argue and I had lost love for him I decided to end it.The problem is I have now moved on with someone else but he keeps messaging me saying he wants an explanation for why I treated him so badly. Because I was never really there for him after he cheated. Also I'm a very private person because in a previous relationship when my ex left I lost all my friends because they were people I knew through him... So I liked to keep my friends and boyfriend separate, he has taken this as a major thing against him and that i'm embarressed of him.I suffer with depression and I dont think he ever really understood the way it effected me either.I suppose my question is how can I get him to stop contacting me? I feel awful that he's taken the break up so badly and is still in love with me, but I don't want him anymore, he wasn't right for me at all.I've tried to explain things to him but he just says I've messed him up and keeps messaging. Help please, thanks Ace
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female
reader, Denise32  +, writes (23 January 2013):
 I recommend phoning him one last time and telling him flat-out "You want to know why I ended it? It's because you cheated on me while we were together and I could no longer trust you. That is ALL the explanation you're going to get. I do not want you to contact me again, under any circumstances. Is that understood?"
Give him a moment to respond but DON'T permit him to pester you into a long drawn-out discussion. If he attempts more than a one or two sentence reply, hang up on him.
As others have said, you owe him NOTHING. Change your email, block him from your phone, and if necessary change the locks on your home.
Good luck.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (23 January 2013):
 Read SVC's response..... Do you "get it?" If not, then read it, again and again, until you do (get it).....
Then, you can get on with your life....
Good luck....
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (23 January 2013):
 The other three posts are right, you owe him absolutely nothing. He broke the trust boundries by being unfaithful to you now he has got to live with the consequences, which is he has lost you. You have moved on with your life now, your happy and with someone else. Tell him one last time that you and him will never be in a relationship ever again and to stop contacting you.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (23 January 2013):
 Personally if you have explained it once or more you owe him nothing else.
Tell him this "I am telling you one last time, you cheated. I ended it. it's over it's done i wish no further contact"
then:
Block his number.
Block his email
block him on social media
If she bothers you at work or home or any other way, he's harassing you and the police should become involved.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (23 January 2013):
 Why do you owe him an explanation for why you "treated him badly after he cheated?" He's already explained it to himself, it's because he cheated. Block his number and move on. He's just harassing you now.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (23 January 2013):
 Hi
You don't owe him an explanation, you finished it, he cheated,you do not trust him.If he can't get his head round that its his problem,not yours.
Enjoy your new relationship and ignore your Ex.
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A
female
reader, cute angel  +, writes (23 January 2013):
 You're acting like the victim when it's not you but your ex boyfriend..you have moved on well good for you, but your boyfriend needs closure as simple as that! So you need to go to him straight up tell him why you dumped him and you have moved on and he should do, wish him the best..that's the least you could do!!
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