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Worked a lot of different jobs, going where-ever the money happens to be and traveled a bit. |
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| Latest articles: Men can't read women
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 March 2008: Slashdot is a geek site focussing mostly on tech. Relationship advice is not something you will find there, but this story just has to be mentioned. http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/03/30/0028211 http://www.livescience.co...
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Can anyone shed some light on my questions about masturbation?
Q. ok. this is gonna sound reeeaaalllly weird. but that's okay. :) so when i masturbate i get a lot of pleasure from it; it feels sooooo good and everything but when i reach a "climax" i don't think i actually orgasm... isn't, like... stuff supposed...
A. 3 May 2009: Squirting is a porn myth. Yes it happens, sometimes for some females but it is not a requirement.
As for how you masturbate. Whatever works. If you rub on the outside then you are stimulating your clitoris. It works, so it works. If you masturba... (read in full...)
Dealing with an "emotionally unavailable" man
Q. I hear about how common it is for the husband to be "emotionally unavailable", but how does a wife deal with that? Thing is, it's not like we have all the time together. He is in the military and is gone for periods of 3-6 months. Thing is, he has ...
A. 3 May 2009: What army has deployments of 3 months?
If he has been to war, might he be suffering from trauma?
Anyway, you are not describing an emotionally unavailable man but a sexually selfish man. He gets his jollies, you don't get yours.
Has he... (read in full...)
I think he called me fat.am I overreacting?
Q. Sorry that this is kinda long, but I think the back story is relevant... So I've been dating this guy for about seven months and 99.9% of the time he is really sweet and really good to me. But there are these little things. I'm 5'7" 148 lbs. No...
A. 3 May 2009: "You have a pretty enough face to make money in that industry, but you would need to lose some weight to have the body for it."
That is a compliment? And it works. Good! I never know how to come up with them myself. Let me try it at once.
... (read in full...)
Daughter trying to get us to go to social events that we feel uncomfortable about
Q. I;m having a serious dilemma. Its a long story ,but I will the try short form, so I wouldn't go too deep. So my daughter is trying to make us go to social events thru a very fancy university. Social balls, etc. We feel totally out of place, as we ar...
A. 3 May 2009: You can rent outfits.
Your daughter is trying to include you in her life. Be thankful, far to many families drift apart.
Would you rather she tried to exclude you because she was embarrassed.
If she is asking you to attend weekly balls, yes... (read in full...)
Don't like him, but do like him, what do I do?
Q. Ok, one of my friends asked me out a few times a while ago and I said I couldn't go out with him 'cause I don't like him like that. Everything was fine until our schedules changed at school and we started hanging out a lot more. Now he keeps ...
A. 3 May 2009: You don't like him romantically, but you do like being around him?
Why do I think the sentence "If only I could find a boyfriend like him" is waiting to be uttered by you?
Either you like him purely as a friend and then you would be leaning... (read in full...)
Age..just a number?
Q. i really like this guy- but hes 24 and i'm 14. i know i have to get over it, but i just can't! i try so hard but it doesn't work. I see him all the time, and he acts like its a joke that i'm in love with him when we're around other people, but when ...
A. 3 May 2009: If one is 24 and the other 34, then age is just a number. Both are adults and both have probably found their place in the world.
You are not an adult, he is and then a decade is REALLY big number. To get to his age, you still have to face what is ... (read in full...)
I broke up with him because I thought he was gay... but he wasn't!
Q. About a month ago I broke up with my boyfriend cuz I thought he was gay but then i found out that he wasent what should i do cuz as soon as i dumped him i got a NEW boyfriend and now he doesnt really talk to me, in fact i think he hates me, what ...
A. 2 May 2009: So, you called him gay, you dumped him and immidiatly humped another guy.
"in fact i think he hates me".
Duh, you think?
Apologize and leave him the hell alone. Should he be crazy enough to get back with you, it will be when he is ready... (read in full...)
How can I forgive and forget with these images in my head?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 3 years now. She told me she was a virgin and wanted to stay a virgin till she gets married. I agreed, because I am a virgin too. Everything was going okay. Until last month, she said that she can't lie to me ...
A. 2 May 2009: I wonder if you should forgive her.
That she is a virgin doesn't really matter. Yes she lied about, but maybe she felt ashamed and her desire to start a new life with you made her afraid to tell the truth. Remember that a girl of 11 cannot l... (read in full...)
Take your shoes off! Thanks!
Q. Call me PETTY, but i am a woman of PRINCIPLE. I recently put a sign on my front door saying, take your shoes off, thanks!! I was getting so angry with everyone bringing mud and grass in to the house and getting it all over my laminate floors ...
A. 2 May 2009: Seems odd to me. In the west it is not a tradition as far as I know to take your shoes off. Japan has that tradition and supplies slippers for all visitors even in really odd places.
But england has the same?
Some people just might not get wh... (read in full...)
He wants anal without a condom
Q. Me and my boyfriend have recently had anal sex for the first time(with condom). It was great, i felt no pain at all and he enjoyed it alot. We are gonna do it again this weekend, but he wants to do it without a condom and i dont want to. What can i ...
A. 2 May 2009: "You can't catch anything on the firs time."
Oh well, at least you ain't falling for it. Still, as a male I would be worried. Either I am dating someone with the IQ of a houseplant or someone who thinks I got the IQ of a houseplant by trying t... (read in full...)
Do guys just want us girls for sex?
Q. is it true that when a guy is with a girl it is mostly for sex? most of my guy friends say they love a girl but then say i wanna do her tonight....
A. 2 May 2009: Yup, and keep that in mind next time a guy seems to want to promise you the stars and the moon but has his hands down your pants.
There is someone out there who wants you and not just for sex. Just got to make sure you spot him between the toad... (read in full...)
Choosing between 2 colleges
Q. Hi I need help. I want to be a photographer, and I have to choose between two different colleges. I can go to college "one", which will cost $30, 000 and take me 3 years to save for. this course goes for two years and when I finish I will h...
A. 2 May 2009: Student loans are pretty normal. While it shows real wisdom not wanting to have a debt, this is different. There will be no suprise intrest rates, the loan is extremely limite in how you can spend it (you are not getting it to go on a holidy or a ... (read in full...)
I'm 19 and pregnant. The father is addicted to pot and drinking
Q. ~I'm 19 and pregnant and the farther is addicted to weed and drinking. My first problem was started a year ago last January when I started to date a guy that was defiantly not the kind I use to date. He was wild almost right out of person. He di...
A. 2 May 2009: "I really love him and want to be that person that saves him."
Oh dear god. Well at least you put it clearly. Pity that it never ever works. It is not as if you have been capable of saving yourself.
You say you will give up drugs except pot... (read in full...)
How can you tell the difference between comfort and love?
Q. I am very happy in my relationship, but not passionate about it. I don't want to leave it, but don't know that this is it. It would be hard not to be with him, but I don't see myself with him forever either. How can you tell the difference ...
A. 2 May 2009: The real question should be this.
What is the difference between No-match, Love, Comfort and LUST!
Far to many people confuse LUST with Love and Comfort with No-match.
Lust is what you feel for a playboy bunny, you are horny but there is n... (read in full...)
He can't keep an erection and I am too young to forgo this part of my life! Help?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for over a year we are both in our late forties and married for 20 years and divorced. He shared withme while we had been dating for 2 or 3 weeks that he had diabetes and therefore can not get an erection. I do love ...
A. 2 May 2009: He has diabetes and eats junk food and drinks soft drinks (I presume with sugar not Coca-Cola Zero)? That ain't right.
If he is really diabetic he would have been put onto a strict diet one he must follow if he doesn't want to die. It is that ext... (read in full...)
My husband is socially useless
Q. Hi, i just don't know how to help my husband. Hes socially inept, and i have almost a fear of him meeting anybody in case he humiliates me and himself. Hes a great partner and father, i cannot fault him. he treats me well and is committed to us ...
A. 1 May 2009: My my, aren't we judgemental. You are normal, he is the freak. Well, "normal" girl, is he is so socially inept, how did he ever bag a party girl like yourself?
For that matter, what attracted you to him. Why not date a normal guy. I am sure the... (read in full...)
My husband is very mean to me
Q. I have been married for 18 years and i am very frustrated and confused about my marriage. I love my husband but i am not in love with him anymore because of the way he treats me. He is the kind of person who punishes me when he does not get his way. ...
A. 1 May 2009: Mmm, you say he might act this way because of the way his parents acted towards him.
So. What will your daughter learn from the way you two are behaving. What rolemodels are you setting for your daughter.
Daughters marry their fathers (no not ... (read in full...)
I think I'm ready, but how do you know if you're ready for a sexual relationship?
Q. Hey, Theres been alot of boys who have asked me for sex, hand job, head job etc... But im still a virgin, i havent given head job or hand job or been fingered, the firther-est ive been is like kissing and its really embarressing. I feel that im re...
A. 1 May 2009: Yeah, you don't need to ask anyone. You asked, therefor you are not ready. Andb what is the rush? It is embarrising to be a virgin? Wait till you are pregnant and have to explain that you don't know who the dad is. That is embarrising.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend thinks it would be a turn on to watch me having sex with our dog!
Q. Hi everyone, I am 26 and have been with my current bf for almost 3 years. We have a great relationship, he is perfect in many ways. We get along great and have a great sex life. We are both very open at trying new things sexually and I will admit ...
A. 1 May 2009: It is a known extreme fetish. If you are not into it, and he is then there is going to be problems. Something this extreme which both of you are going to suffer from if it comes out, is not something you should do unless you yourself want to do it. ... (read in full...)
A question about virginity for all the boys out there
Q. This is mainly aimed at boys but girls can answer too, i would like to know, if a girl said that she wanted to lose her virginity to you but didn't want to be in a relationship with you, would you mind? Or would that be a problem for you? Thanks....
A. 1 May 2009: What? Sex with no strings attached? Whats the catch?... (read in full...)
I feel cheated in bed!
Q. my boyfriend and i have been together for a long time now. we have struggled with his impotence problem from the very start of our relationship. i want us to have that bond sexually. 95% of the time the sex is not very good. i do what i can to ...
A. 30 April 2009: So, from what you it is not just impotence, he is simply not willing to try.
Impotence doesn't stop a guy from performing oral sex. Being, well, an asshole does that.
It seems to me that is is all coming from one direction. You love him, but wh... (read in full...)
What would happen if I went on a water-only diet?
Q. hey all. i hear that starving yourself makes u only lose water so what i want to know is what happens if i go on a water-only-diet? wil i lose the kilos? im 90kgs and i wud like to be 50 by the end of may. please help...
A. 30 April 2009: http://mentock.home.mindspring.com/waterdiet.htm
Are you talking about this?
Doesn't sound like much of a diet, and as it says itself, it a slow process. It prescribes eating your normal food, just making sure you drink enough simple water (2 ... (read in full...)
I am unsure of how to come to terms with my good friend being gay
Q. I have just met up with a very close friend who I havent seen in many years. I found out the reason we fell out is because she is gay and she could not tell me as we were so close she didnt want me to feel like she fancied me. We had seen each other ...
A. 30 April 2009: It is pretty common to think that the opposite sex wants nothing more to jump your bones. Especially when you are as fantastic as me, who can blame hetero women for lusting after me.
Oh, you don't... well you must be gay.
See what I am trying... (read in full...)
We only have sex about once a month but I want more!
Q. Hi,iv been with my bf for nearly four years now and living together for 2. I love being with him cos we have loads in commen and everything but he just doesnt get intimate with me much at all anymore,it hurts when we go to bed at night and he wont ...
A. 30 April 2009: What has changed?
Is he impotent, or just has a severely reduced sex drive?
Hard question but a common cause for it is stress. I believe the UK especially is at the moment experiencing the full effect of the credit crisis. Nothing like kil... (read in full...)
Said no, but now feel guilty
Q. Hi guys i still talk 2 my ex but the other day he said he may need 2 borrow my car 2 take him,his gf, and his child out for the day and i said no But now i feel really guilty that i said no, i dont really have a problam with it its just that i ...
A. 30 April 2009: Wait a minute. YOUR car for HIS gf, HIS child (not yours?) and HIMSELF.
He is your EX. That means he is in the PAST! What the hell kind of society do you live in when an ex with no futher connection to you can possible expect to borrow your car... (read in full...)
Stay at home mom..I need help
Q. Hi im a 20 year old stay at home mom for my boyfriend of 2 years daughter. i have been raising her for a year and a half. pretty much by myself. i dropped out of school and do not have a permanent job. to top it all off we have moved to the country ...
A. 30 April 2009: Volunteer work? There tends to be a lot and it is way to get out there and be useful.... (read in full...)
Help.....Why???
Q. Hi...after 3 years of dating, I feel lost. I don't exactly know what I want from my ex who broke up with me a month ago. This was so sudden that I am so hurt. We have had problems, but I have been the one trying to cater to his ego. He is a ...
A. 30 April 2009: There are childeren starving from hunger, god has got time to sort out your bf troubles?
Perhaps a little less praying and a little more opening your eyes and seeing that YOU have to take charge of your own life. God helps those that help themselv... (read in full...)
I'm not gay but I like the idea of it!
Q. hi ppl, im straight and have a gf, but i like this show i watch and its kinda guy on guy relationship show aimed at teenage girls. i like it cuz its funny and interesting, but when this 1 scene in the first episode where the 2 guys kiss, i just wish ...
A. 30 April 2009: Sexuality is a bit more complex then GAY-BI-HETERO.
More men then women are claimed to have same sex experiences despite how common female-on-female kisses are even in media.
How is your relationship with your GF? Are you with her because a gu... (read in full...)
I kissed my cousin 3 time.....and I liked it
Q. right.. ermm restly i went back to zimbabwe to stay with some family who i hadn't seen in over 3yrs, and i wasn't really looking forward to going cos my counsin who i sow last and he didn' talk to me. well this time he did talk and we got really c...
A. 30 April 2009: Depends, cousins can be far removed from each other. Hence the term "kissing cousins".
If he ain't close in the bloodline then you two did nothing wrong.
No idea what the local laws are in your case but I think in general anything further... (read in full...)
Thinking of having a three-some!
Q. me and my boyfriend are thinking of having a three-some. he of course is the 1 with the idea and im half there for it. i do want to experience it but of course there are reasons that put me off it a bit. i know we need to set boundaries, but does...
A. 30 April 2009: Do you like to share your toys? Were you as a kid protective of your dolls/trains and "sharing" meant beating your little sibling around the head with them?
Because that is after all what you are going to be expected to do, share you BF (or if i... (read in full...)
Man whore got me knocked up!
Q. sooo im not in the best situation right now im a very privalaged kid. i have alot i have a nice flexible job my own car my own house a nice allowence. yeah i have my far share of partying and all that jazz. but i have been hooking up with this guy ...
A. 30 April 2009: lets face it, we got two kids here who just aren't grown up enough yet (if ever) to raise a kid. Adoption might sound like a good alternative to an outsider but you are the one asked to carry the baby to full term and then give it up.
Basic... (read in full...)
He just wants to play online games. I don't know what to do, and I'm lonely...
Q. This confuses me, so good luck potential advice givers. I've been in my relationship three years now, and I've overcome a lot. But, to the more recent issue, he has a bad online addiction to MMO RPGs. He used to be so hooked on WOW that he turned ...
A. 30 April 2009: What you need to do is grow up. Stop trying to play house with a boy who doesn't want to. You are no longer a little kid, you can't force you the neighbours kid to be daddy because your growth spurt makes you bigger then him.
He does NOT want to ... (read in full...)
I finally dumped my cheating abusive boyfriend...Now I want him back
Q. I finally got the courage and strength to bring up the subject of breaking up/going on a break with my boyfriend of two years. After countless times of cheating, and abuse, I let him go... Thing is I thought I'd feel better, but instead I find m...
A. 30 April 2009: Try to remember what the abuse was like. If it was physical and you had a lousy lonely day, cheer yourself up with the thought that tonight you are going alone to bed with no bruises.
Just remember WHY you split. People are odd, we forget the bad ... (read in full...)
Should I call or let it be?
Q. I have been with this guy for a few months. He knows that I wont do anything with him unless I get some kind of commitment but he still can't call himself my b/f because he isn't ready and doesn't want to make promises he can't keep. He did, ...
A. 30 April 2009: enjoimx got a point, love gives. Of course, his point only works on silly people who don't reason through.
If love gives and he gives nothing then he doesn't love you.
You got to ask what enjoimix in his relationships gives. Is he only a taker?... (read in full...)
Should I have a sex change and become a man...
Q. My ex-boyfriend had a sex change recently, but I am still in love with him!!! Now that he is a woman, I feel like I am a lesbian, although I have never felt this way about a girl before. Should I have a sex change and become a man, and therefore ...
A. 28 April 2009: Do you want to be a man? It is not even an option unless you really really deeply desire it and suffer each day for being in the wrong body.
Sex changes are not given lightly.
Consider what your friend went through, it is not something people... (read in full...)
I don't want my boyfriend to go to jail...
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for five months now - since about a week before he and his ex broke up. They were together for two years and I'll admit, he was not the nicest guy towards his ex. For two years, he emotionally and physically ...
A. 28 April 2009: Consider this. If you lie for him, he is under constant risk from you changing your story to the police. A known rapist and wife-beater with a new wife who could land him in jail anytime she feels like it.
I wouldn't be starting any long books.... (read in full...)
Is 14 really the average age people lose their virginity ?
Q. I went to see this topic and i saw this answer on its site http://www.dearcupid.org/question/15-year-old-virgin.html Is 14 really the average age people lose their virginity ? Is what he said true ? ...
A. 27 April 2009: Lies, damn lies and statistics. ... (read in full...)
Why do I let him treat me like such a doormat?
Q. Gonna ask a stupid question and your gonna think im silly. My ex and me have been on/off 3yrs! Weve never lived together. Gone on on hol together! He has on two lads hols! Never seen each other more than 4 days wk! And yet he tells me he loves me ...
A. 27 April 2009: "Its not me is it? This isnt what its mean to be like surely?"
Yes, and yes. You let him behave this way, reward it even by being there whenever he feels like using you some more and then even being more sub-servant then a normal would be in a hea... (read in full...)
I'm falling for a guy that my sister used to fancy! What do I do??
Q. I have started dating a guy I really like and things are going really well. He is really into me too and it would seem I have nothing to worry about at all. We have a sexual relationship and things are great in that department too. The problem is ...
A. 26 April 2009: Keeping it in the family eh?
But what REALLY is the problem? He had sex with other women, you had sex with other men. By change, you happen to know one of his exes really well but does this make a difference?
I would be wary of the fact that he... (read in full...)
Eye glass fetish anyone?
Q. I need to know more about my partners fetish for women wearing eye glasses(not sun glasses).Do any other women have partners with this fetish,or are there any men who have this fetish?What is it about the glasses that do it for him!Also i don't need ...
A. 23 April 2009: You can get plain glass ones from most optomotrists. Hell, unless things have changed, you can just buy the ones on dispay.
It is a fetish not dissimmilar to stockings/garter. Uniform. Suit. Etc etc.
The idea behind it might be that girls with ... (read in full...)
Call me old fashoined, or stupid, or naive, but I believe that truly amazing and intense sex comes from love!
Q. Does the best sex ever mean he truly loves me? Call me old fashoined, or stupid, or naive, or whatever you want, but I believe that truly amazing and intense sex comes from love, and not JUST the physical stimulation. My current boyfriend is by far ...
A. 18 April 2009: Okay, you are stupid and naive. Do you know what truly comes from love? Not great sex, that is a bonus, but the desire NOT to hurt the others feelings by cheating.
He cheats, hurting you, therefor he doesn't love you.
By your logic, if a kid ... (read in full...)
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