A
female
age
30-35,
*wohearts
writes:This is mainly aimed at boys but girls can answer too, i would like to know, if a girl said that she wanted to lose her virginity to you but didn't want to be in a relationship with you, would you mind? Or would that be a problem for you? Thanks. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2009): To be perfectly honest most of you people are naive as hell about your own gender. You can't just say "No guy would do that" or "Hell yea! guys would totally go for that" You have to take into consideration, the guy, his feelings for the girl currently, if he's a good enough guy to respect a friend enough to not do something like that. If you wish to become friends with benefits with him then tell him so, you either date him or become friends with benefits and honestly? Depending on you guys, it'll most likely end up with one of you or both of you finding it too awkward and he'll be possibly sad because he's having sex with you but it's not "making love" it is simply just sex, he's shown that he wants more than that, he wants to hold you and care for you as well as the sexual things that may come with that.Thing deeply about a few things 1) Do you really not like him? Would it hurt to try a honest to go relationship with the guy?2) Are you willing to chance screwing up your friendship and having people label you things you don't want to be labelledand last but not least, do you 100% think you wouldn't regret this if you met a guy you loved and really DID wish you could give your virginity to?
A
male
reader, daletom  +, writes (5 May 2009):
Well, if I was about 18 years old - and she was about that age - and she was somebody I just sort-of knew (not really a good friend, but not a total stranger) - I probably wouldn't believe she was serious. In spite of what she said, I'd think she REALLY wanted a relationship. If she convinced me she really wanted it, I'd probably give in - and feel guilty afterwards.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2009): Yes, a Woman's Virginity is sacred till she is married. Yeah I know call me ol fashioned but when I was dating I prided on going out with Virgin's....
Keep your Virginity till your 30 (hey that rhymes)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009): Yes, I would mind
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A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (2 May 2009):
 The catch?
She's making a terrible mistake, if she is actually contemplating such a thing.
It's true that many guys would jump at the offer. However, it's still not right! Sex without love doesn't mean anything.
Above all, with all of the illnesses that are prevalent now... it's literally risking your life to have sex with just anyone. If you love him and he doesn't reciprocate then he's just using you. Don't do it!
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A
female
reader, twohearts +, writes (1 May 2009):
twohearts is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your input, i will have to think more about this before I make a definate decision on whether to talk to him about it or not.
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A
female
reader, kissxmexagainx +, writes (1 May 2009):
 I have no problem with people having sex with close friends for the release. but I don't think you should give your virginity to a guy that you don't love or want to be in a relationship with. just my opinion.
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A
female
reader, Fiona xxx +, writes (1 May 2009):
 My perspective is, how can something be truly casual and no-strings if you already know eachother quite well. That sounds like it's getting near to friends with benefits.
What's wrong with actually going out with him? Are you worried how well you'll get on in a relationship? Worried about commitment being young?
Let's face it most people don't tend to only sleep with the one person, so you don't have to worry about him bieng the guy you'll marry. I am just saying it helps if you are boyfrien/girlfriend and been together a few weeks and can imagine being together "a while" a while can only be 6 months or so, doesn't have to be really long-term.
I am starting to think things can get complicated if you use somebody you know for sex, somebody you like in a friendship way. Don't forget many people start to date a guy they already know. Where do you draw the line between a guy you get on with and have sex with; or a boyfriend, and a friend with benefits. That line is somewhat confused and I doubt both people ever agree, surely he'll always like you more?
In my opinion casual no-strings sex only works if you actually don't know the person first (you meet for the first time in a pub or nightclub that night). Otherwise one person can end up really liking the other and feel used.
Fiona
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A
male
reader, MyWife,MyLife  +, writes (1 May 2009):
Regretful going into the future comes to mind.......Virginity is something to be respected and cherished. Knowing what I know now, sex is not an act to be rushed into or be indifferent to. The mental anguish potential alone should have you considering the consequences of doing so. In numerous relationships I've been in, as geeky as it may sound, I'd have rathered we were both virgins. More would have developed in them were we.
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A
female
reader, twohearts +, writes (1 May 2009):
twohearts is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't really see it as a casual thing though, because I know him quite well, i've met some of his family and we get on really well so i trust him. I just don't know how he would react if i told him my fellings, because not so long ago he was wanting to be in a relationship but I didn't want to. I still don't but there are other feelings I have for him.
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A
female
reader, Seven_Deadlies +, writes (1 May 2009):
 For your first, I wouldn't recommend it. Plus if the word gets around that you'd give sex with no catch, could you imagine the attention you'd get for the wrong reason? If you ever did want a proper realtionship, you'd probably be used then.What ever you do, make sure you're protected xx
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female
reader, Fiona xxx +, writes (1 May 2009):
Generally if you offer sex on a plate, lads would jump at the chance! Guys wouldn't object to the no-strings either. However because you ask, are you really a virgin? I ask because most of us want some sort of romance and anticipate that you'll be together a while, even if it's not the whole year.
I know you can find somebody attrative in lust-terms or in relationship terms. But does a virgin really think in that way? Or if you are a virgin, are you really comfortable with a casual encounter for your first time. I am saying that because the first time is a bit vulnerable and scary. Granted the guy won't mind, but would you? You might mind if you are a virgin, but not mind afterwards if you are not you see. Just my perspective.
Fiona
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): I don't know. My pesky conscience (yes, some guys still have one) would probably get in the way at some point, if I felt the girl was young and somewhat delusional, and didn't know what she was doing... or what she even wanted really.It would depend on the girl/situation.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): think really hard about this one. Do u really want to look back in a few years time and think that the first time you had sex meant nothing to you?please be careful, and if you do decide to do it, be safe.Also, you might get yourself a bad reputation, so if u want to do it, u need to be prepared for the consequences.
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female
reader, kaylagal +, writes (1 May 2009):
 Virginity has nothing to do with it. It's free sex and most guys will be on it, they won't even ask why, they don't want to know. They will try and get it b4 you change your mind.Bigger question is - why would any self-loving and respecting girl do that?
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (1 May 2009):
 What's the catch? How old is she? Are you sure she's a virgin? Something just doesn't feel right about this!
If something sounds too good to be true, then usually it is.
Just make sure that you use protection even if she says she is on the pill etc etc!
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A
female
reader, twohearts +, writes (1 May 2009):
twohearts is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThere are no strings, it's just i've liked this guy for a while and i now he likes me because he's asked me out a few times, it's just i don't want to be in a relationship with him right now. But i really want him in the other way. But i don't know how to tell him, or if he would mind. Thanks for your help
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male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (1 May 2009):
 I agree with Lazy Guy :-). He hit the nail on the head. That would be too good to be true.
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female
reader, niki20 +, writes (1 May 2009):
 Virginity is so precious. Dont loose it on a one night stand. You could never get it back and it wouldnt be what you want it to be just quick sex and ot over??? Dont you want romance or anything?
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (1 May 2009):
 What? Sex with no strings attached? Whats the catch?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): It depedns on the girl, how close you are, wheather or not you think it would cause problems (usually doesn't) and if you ind her attractive. Personally, i can name a good few that i wouldn't mind at all. Oh, but if its your first not the best idea.
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (1 May 2009):
 hell on!
guys would love that!
but then you could get yourself a name by other girls!
so be careful though and think of all the consequences.
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