A
female
age
30-35,
*onnaBlume
writes:sooo im not in the best situation right now im a very privalaged kid. i have alot i have a nice flexible job my own car my own house a nice allowence. yeah i have my far share of partying and all that jazz. but i have been hooking up with this guy who has a girl friend but also sleeps with a different girl every night lets just say he is a taken man whore. so i have been sleeping with him on and off for about2 months. i think he is very accident prone. he does has a kid who is under the age of two. and here i am prego! there is no if and or buts about this its either marriage or abortion. i wouldnt want to be with him just cuz im knocked up but then i would be haunted by the loss of the baby! do i tell him i am knocked up or do i keep it my self and deal with the emotional baggage?
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): Ya, apparently I am the dramatic one, Pebbles, since my answers are soooo rude that they have caused as much attention as yours.... And you speak of drama....
I was merely pointing out that the girl is in a rough enough situation that she doesnt really need the open criticism, but more good, non-judgemental advice. Pregnancy is a sensitive enough time in your life.
Hon, I wish you the best! I think abortion is a good option in your situation, as long as you are comfortable with it. Im sure it wont be easy, but it is the least selfish thing you could do right now. Bringing a child into a situation like yours will only be detrimental to it's and your well being.
Take care ;)
A
female
reader, pebble  +, writes (30 April 2009):
 Where did I say you were a hooker?I just pointed out that if this guy is a huge player then it's likely he might be the one spreading gross diseases to everyone he goes near. STIs are everywhere. Chances are, he's got something. No one can disagree with that surely? And because of him you should be looking out for your health. It's only common sense.There's no need to swear. It doesn't make you look impressive. I'm glad you've come to a decision - it seems to be the right one and I wish you all the best.
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female
reader, ZonnaBlume +, writes (30 April 2009):
ZonnaBlume is verified as being by the original poster of the question thanks for all the help all of you. im not un appercative for any of them non of them madde me feel uncomfortable some people are just frank and rude. but its all good now :)
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A
female
reader, ZonnaBlume +, writes (30 April 2009):
ZonnaBlume is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni am getting it taken care of. i cant be a single mom. i cant have the baby. im just gonna get the abortion. i havent told him because his best friend said he would want me to keep it and he will contuine to be the dog he is. i have an appt. on monday so everything will be okay. as for me and him i've put thing to an end. ish. i dont call him anymore i wait for him to call me and i started to live my single life style again PROTECTED thank you very much. and as for that fucking rude bitch pebbles or what ever who answered and made me seem like a fucking hooker im clean thank you very much thanks for the advice every one.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy +, writes (30 April 2009):
 lets face it, we got two kids here who just aren't grown up enough yet (if ever) to raise a kid. Adoption might sound like a good alternative to an outsider but you are the one asked to carry the baby to full term and then give it up.
Basically, you got three choices.
Abortion, but you say you are against this.
Adoption, can you really give up the baby after carrying it for so long?
Single mother, frankly, any girl that calls the man she of her own accord slept with a "man whore" is not mature enough to raise a baby. Unless you can do a LOT of growing up in 7 months this really ain't an option either.
Marriage? Yeah, that ain't an option, unless you can find another guy to step in.
So what is your choice? Well, that is the problem and why adults say kids should wait with sex. Sometimes there just ain't any good solutions. Every option sucks. Part of becoming mature is to make sure you never get into this situation.
You know your options, none might be ideal but you got to pick one and life with it for the rest of your life. It ain't fair, it ain't nice, but that is life.
Deal with it sweetie, the baby is real and the longer you wait, the harder an abortion will be.
If you decide to keep it, well young mothers have started from worse and done okay. Immature as name calling is, my experience is some people have it in them to grow up really fast if they have to. Can you?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2009): Well if your question was whether you should choose marriage or abortion, I think the answer is obviously abortion. I just don't think you're going to convince the "man-whore" with a girlfriend to marry you because you got pregnant. Sounds like an awful start for your little baby, doesn't it?Don't worry uncle phil and pebble. I think your frank answers are refreshing.
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female
reader, pebble +, writes (29 April 2009):
Mental issues? God Lord, isn't someone being a bit dramatic?
The poster is in pain because he had sex with someone who was unavailable and couldn't be bothered to protect herself. She's in this situation because of her own terrible decisions. She won't get much sympathy in the real world for her actions, so why should we sugercoat things here?
If you are uncomfortable with hearing other peoples' opinions (especially ones that differ to yours) then you are missing the whole point of this website.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2009): Well, Pebble.... You obviously came on this site for a reason as well as everyone else here!! To get advice from an outside, non-judgmental perspective. Apparently you have some serious mental issues to be so hurtful towards someone that is obviously in some pain herself!! How insensitive!!! If you dont have anything nice to say just dont say it at all!!!
Honey, You are in a rough situation. I would personally talk to your parents about it, as they seem (from how you are describing your life) like they would have the best answers for you. Dont be afraid of their disappoinment. Everybody makes irrational decisions and mistakes. You definitely need to talk to the boy about it, but he sounds rather irresponsible and not someone who would be a good choice in a lifetime mate or a parent for that matter, so I would definitely put more weight on what your parents have to say about it. But above all, listen to yourself. And don't pay attention to all of the negative people on here that really know nothing about you at all.
Good luck!!! Give us updates... ;)
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female
reader, pebble +, writes (29 April 2009):
You know what else is out of order? Childish name calling. Don't be a hypocrite.
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female
reader, chazx +, writes (29 April 2009):
 Pebble and uncle phil you are bang out of order.
What she has done is her choice, its her life and shes asking for advice so stop acting like its your life
being nasty wont help anything.
Hun tell the bf/F buddy and go from there.
marrying him wont change his ways but do you think you could honest deal with having an abortion.
being a single parent isnt all that bad.
if u need a private answer (away from the A**holes on here) email me
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female
reader, pebble +, writes (29 April 2009):
Well this guy sounds like he's perfect for marriage.
Maybe you should use your nice allowance from this privilaged life of yours to get you some condoms. And an STI test. Just a thought.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2009): Okay you do need to tell him, whether you decide to keep it or not comes later. Tell him soon
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2009): I'd marry him and keep it if I were you. He sounds like a nice boy who will be very supportive.
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