Should I stay with my girlfriend of 6 years?
Q. Hi, I just wanted to get some advice on my relationship as probably I could do with it. I'm 33 and my girlfriend is five years younger than me. We have been going out for 6-7 years. I’m not sure if I should stay with her. When she has no problem ...
A. 2 March 2015: OP: Read your original posting... and your two "replies" to us Aunts and Uncles....
IF you still think there is even a smidgen of "something" that you ought to pursue with this girl... then you, Sir, are beyond hope... and I'm sorry that I o... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is set on renting a house with me, but I don't know if I can afford it!
Q. hi, i am 22 and my girlfried is 19, my girlfriend of 9 months is planning on getting a flat with me next year, wich i dont feel ready for, i pay 180 a month to live with my mum and dad and am on a decent wage , and she pays 100 a month to live with ...
A. 25 February 2015: Here's a script you might wish to print-out and have in your hand when you next discuss this with her:
"Hunchy-bunchy, I love you dearly... and enjoy the time we spend together... and would even like to spend MORE time with you. HOWEVER, if "spen... (read in full...)
My 18 year old daughter is sleeping with a 31 year old man. What do I do?
Q. My daughter is 18 and living and sleeping with a 31 year old man. In my heart I feel this is totally inappropriate. Her father is so upset. They got into a huge fight. Now I am in a deep state of depression. I don't see how my daughter believes that ...
A. 24 February 2015: You can't do a darn thing. Your daughter qualifies as an "adult".... so she gets to make mistakes all by herself.
Anything you (or, hubby) sez will be considered interference, and is more likely to be met with further resistance than with acq... (read in full...)
The girl I am dating is going to have to move 9 hours away. How do I tell her I want to go too?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have just recently started dating a long time friend (known her two years, dated about a month). I have never been in love, but I feel more for this girl than I have anyone in my whole life. I'm 25 and she's 26 by the way. The prob...
A. 24 February 2015: I suggest you let her move... and that you and she continue your "relationship" in the context of that distance. IF, over time (let's say, a year or so) you and she decide that you want to become ROMANTICALLY closer, then do so then....
You a... (read in full...)
Should I stay with my girlfriend of 6 years?
Q. Hi, I just wanted to get some advice on my relationship as probably I could do with it. I'm 33 and my girlfriend is five years younger than me. We have been going out for 6-7 years. I’m not sure if I should stay with her. When she has no problem ...
A. 24 February 2015: Some couples find that they can live in a "yo-yo" relationship - such as you've described - indefinitely... maybe forever.
YOU need to decide if you (and your G/F) are two of those people.
IF you come to your senses.... and figure out how s... (read in full...)
How do you know when it's the right time to move in with your partner?
Q. Recently my boyfriend has mentioned me moving in with him, he wants me to and when he mentioned it I didn't think 'no it's too soon' or 'wow you're moving too fast' however I've mentioned it to a couple of friends and these were there responses. "...
A. 24 February 2015: I suggest that the two of you move in together the day that you get married...
Good luck....... (read in full...)
He chooses to masturbate while looking at pictures of women. Will this only get worse? What can I do?
Q. My partner of seven years just admitted to using pictures of females .. Not porn. Just pictures of their bodies so he can masturbate. So it's not the action of sex - it's strictly their boobs and butts he wants to see. My major concern is that ...
A. 24 February 2015: I have two thoughts to offer:
1. It is not certain that he will cheat on you. There's no reason to believe that his masturbating is a precursor to infidelity... and that leads to....
2. He probably won't stop masturbating until one or mor... (read in full...)
He has too much baggage but I don't have the courage to break up with him!
Q. Well, I'm trying to put an end to my 6 month relationship but I'm having a bit of trouble. I can't quite figure out my feelings towards him. To briefly describe my relationship, I've always had second thoughts about us, but really wanted to try to m...
A. 24 February 2015: Key to your submittal is this: "...but there's just no spark....
If you got in your car to go someplace... and this (quote, above) applied... then you could sit in your driveway and crank the starter moter forever.... and you STILL wouldn't... (read in full...)
My Boyfriend Thinks I'm Faking Orgasm's!
Q. My boyfriend thinks I'm faking orgasm's! We have been together for just over a year and I have never faked an orgasm with him. I don't even think I would be very good at faking one! First of all, why does he think that? My downstairs tenses and ...
A. 13 February 2015: You "boyfriend" is a great example of immature and misguided young men..... You'll be better off without him.
Let his next "girlfriend" fall victim to his sexual intimidations and blackmail.
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Should I keep sending this guy I just met a photo of me everyday?
Q. Hello I am a female and I really need help cause I feel lost. I met a guy one week ago. We spoke and he was very charming and funy. We had so much laughter the night we met. He asked me for my number and I gave it to him. It was Saturday the day I ...
A. 13 February 2015: So much of what you've written screams to me: "This guy is a player.... and you're next on his roster...."
Take things slow and stay in public places....
Good luck... (read in full...)
My friend told me she loves me.
Q. I have a female friend that I have known for about a year. Even though we haven't known each other long we are pretty close. She lives hours away so I don't see her often, but we text and instant message each other almost every day if it is just ...
A. 11 February 2015: NoraB is correct. Contrary to common stereotype it actually IS possible for a guy to "love" a woman ... without seeing her - and treating her - as a sexual conquest.
Stay close, and friends with her... and don't add any additional emphasis... (read in full...)
I feel hurt and betrayed!
Q. I am a 50 plus year old female. I am feeling hurt and betrayed. One of my very best friends, as I've spoke about before in this forum is planning on moving. She claims I am the very best friend she has ever had in her life and I feel the same about ...
A. 9 February 2015: I think the key to your post is this sentence: " I have even shared with her that I lost a very good friend of 30 years because she betrayed me by divulging a secret."
IF this woman (and her hubby) have decided that your adhesion to them is a bit... (read in full...)
How would you feel if your partner told you its not his fault you can't get pregnant because he already has a child?
Q. I feel terrible for even asking this but if you were having difficulties getting pregnant, how would you feel if your partner told you that it can't be his problem as he already has a child? We have been together for three years, and I adore his ...
A. 4 February 2015: My Sister suggests that you go on Maury Povich's TV show.... and you can learn, there, what's been going on... and how to proceed in the future....... (read in full...)
I like his goofy personality. if you were a guy would you feel weird if a girl from your past asked you out?
Q. Ok, so here's the thing. I've never been close with guys before and so never had a guy friend. I'm also pretty sure I'm asexual, so that makes my love life kind of difficult. But i do want to experience relationships and everyone tells me "sometim...
A. 4 February 2015: ARE YOU CRAZY????? I've been spurned by girls up and down the East Coast of this country..... and/so, if one of them were to call me, and ask me out.... I would be at her front door immediately (or, later, if she gave me a preferred time).......... (read in full...)
Would a man stay with a woman for nearly 4 years if he didn't love her?
Q. If your were scared of commitment, would you be with someone for nearly four years. but not live with her. Get close and then pull away again and then repeat. Despite illness on both sides, the rows maybe a couple days of calming down but...
A. 1 February 2015: OP: I believe you missed my glib point.... i.e. That, if a woman is sexually available to him - regardless the circumstances - he may choose to act like an a$$ (as your man seems to be doing).... Don't give him credit for LOVING you, just because ... (read in full...)
Would a man stay with a woman for nearly 4 years if he didn't love her?
Q. If your were scared of commitment, would you be with someone for nearly four years. but not live with her. Get close and then pull away again and then repeat. Despite illness on both sides, the rows maybe a couple days of calming down but...
A. 31 January 2015: IF a woman puts out for a man.... he doesn't even have to know her NAME to continue hanging around with her......... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't support my passion for competing in beauty pageants!
Q. So my BF has recently told me that competing in beauty pageants is a complete waste of my time. That I need to focus on career and becoming a wife and having more kids. I'm 30 and recently auditioned for a pageant and got in. It's coming up in a few ...
A. 29 January 2015: Great "boyfriend" (or ANY kind of "friend"!!!!) you've go there. IF'n he thinks that what you like, for activities, is a waste of your time... and he doesn't wish to support you in your activity... THEN, you have to choose: Your activities or ... (read in full...)
All my friends have said to ditch him but I'm genuinely in love with him. I don't know what to do!
Q. Okay, so there's this boy. We started off as friends, but one night we got very drunk and slept together. We carried on sleeping together every time we got drunk. But then we started doing more, so he'd ask me if i wanted to go for lunch or to the ...
A. 29 January 2015: The key to your submittal is this phrase: "...he then told me he only liked me 'as a friend he could sleep with' nothing more....."
Forget any- and everything that your "friends" might offer as opinions. IF you are OK with that phrase (above) ... (read in full...)
Should I tell this man how I feel knowing he may not return the feelings?
Q. Hi, ive been seeing this guy on and off for a couple of years now we haven't made it official its pretty much been like a booty call, So i never really thought of us as anything else, til like 3 months ago.. i started to grow feelings for him. We ...
A. 29 January 2015: Booty calls are interesting creatures. They're great whilst BOTH participants are enjoying that booty call... THEN, become nightmares when ONE of the participants starts to fall in love with the other... whilest the OTHER is continuing on in ... (read in full...)
Husband wants oral sex 2-3 times a week but sex only once a month?
Q. I have been married for for 3 years together for 13. I've been haveing this issue with him for 2 1/2 years. He wants oral sex about 2-3x per week, but no sex. We have sex once every 6months only if I intiate it. I have spoken to him about it ...
A. 29 January 2015: May I offer my sage advice about this predicament. To wit:
If two people have widely varying sensual/sexual/intimate preferences.... then they must EITHER bring their S/S/I preferences in to concert, OR agree that they are not sufficie... (read in full...)
I want my grandparents story preserved, but I don't want to upset Nan!
Q. Soon, it will be 10 months since my grandad passed away. On and off, for about a year before that, I started to document (in story form) as much of their relationship as my nan could remember - my grandad had a memory block, so he couldn't have told ...
A. 26 January 2015: Many older people LOVE to talk about "the good old days"... IF your Nan is one of them, get your tape recorder out, on the table between you (two) and ask her to start reminiscing.... You can, both, direct the converstion (say, for example, ... (read in full...)
I am so frustrated, all I am to him is somebody for dinner conversation!
Q. My bf is significantly older than me. We have been dating for a year or so. He does not want to make love at all. He has an excuse for every time of day. No he does not have ED. When we first got together there was constant affection. Now he will ...
A. 26 January 2015: If sensuality/sexuality is part of YOUR intimacy menu... and it's NOT on HIS intimacy menu, then you need to part ways and find (yourself) a compatible partner.
I've "BT/DT" and found that a long time in an intimacy desert isn't worth waiting ... (read in full...)
He has 4 kids by different women! How do I ask him about this? How to continue to love someone with so many children?
Q. Dear cupid. Im 35 years old with no kids and never been married. Just met a guy i love so much, i went into his facebook account just to find out about before i can be serious about our relationship. To my suprise he has 4 kids with different woman ...
A. 20 January 2015: I think you have sufficient information to make an informed choice. Either:
1. You are willing to become his FIFTH victim, in a life which may - subsequently - include victims six, seven, eight, and more..... OR,
2. You would prefer to ... (read in full...)
My ex of 3 years has replaced me within 6 weeks
Q. After 3 years of being with my boyfriend from age 16-19 he told me suddenly that he doesn't love me as much as he used to and ended the relationship, he said he wanted to stay friends but I said I would rather not as it would play with my emotions ...
A. 19 January 2015: Isn't it amazing how we guys can dump one girl, then take up with another before the first one has even hit the ground?!?!?
Chalk it up to our amazingly-short attention spans....
Have heart.... not all guys are like this.
Good luck....... (read in full...)
Do I deserve his crazy behavior towards me?
Q. I've just broken up with my boyfriend, again! I desperately want to know if my behaviour is the problem because everything always seems to end up being my fault and I have to apologise. I was seeing him for just over two years and it's been very ...
A. 19 January 2015: You call this a "relationship?" Sounds, to me, more like you being a whipping post, and your "boyfriend" being the tormentor.
I'd last about 15 minutes in such an arrangement. You've put in two years. Consider yourself the record-h... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't want his expensive birthday gift, and I can't get my money back!
Q. I got my boyfriend an pretty expensive bday gift. I got us a cabin as a weekday getaway. I planned everything including food and transportation. I wanted to surprise him and he doesn't want to go. He says he'll be hungover and he wants to go out ...
A. 16 January 2015: Honeypie and Auntie BimBim have hit the spot EXACTLY as to how to handle this.....
P.S. Chalk up the two years as a learning experience that THIS is not the guy for you!!!!!... (read in full...)
Stay renting where I am? Or move in with him? Do I pay him rent when he's the one buying the apartment?
Q. My boyfriend plans to buy an apartment, and asked me if I would like to move in with him when he's bought one. I have suggested we rent together instead, but he's very keen on buying his own place and not rent. He can not afford a big place, so it ...
A. 12 January 2015: Sometimes, romance and "moving in together" has to be stripped of its charm, and be recognized for the "business arrangement" that it may be.....
IF he is buying a flat... and wants you to live with him WHILEST YOU CONTRIBUTE TO THE MORTGAGE... (read in full...)
Its only been five months but he is pushing me to move in
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for 5 months. I am 32 and he is 37. Both of us never been married without children. He is being kind of pushy lately about us progressing forward. Meaning wanting to move in together, looking for rings, and talking ...
A. 12 January 2015: My take on this is... that YOU don't like smoking.... and HE smokes. THAT (alone) would be a "deal-breaker" for me.
... (read in full...)
Don't know if I can be life partners with some-one so soft, but I do love him
Q. I don't know how I feel about my boyfriend anymore. Though he is nice and everything any woman can wish for in a way he cares about me, but he has what we say soft bones. We went out yesterday, and the behavour of a server was unspeac...
A. 12 January 2015: "Sounds" to me as if the two of you are diametrically opposed about one of life's important aspects.
YOU seem to relish conflict; HE eschews and avoids conflict (as you describe him)...
YOU must decide if your love for him is such that it ... (read in full...)
Do you think I might have hurt his feelings? I think of his as my FWB
Q. Dear Cupid, I am currently in a "relationship" with this guy named X. We must be FWB's because we've agreed that we aren't calling each other bf/gf. My question could be complicated for some, mostly because I don't know how to ask it. But I was...
A. 12 January 2015: You write: "He told me that he wanted me to be "his" over text and he wanted it to be official. "
This is a common situation, that we see on this site. It is this: Two people are "FWB". After a while, one "falls for" the other.... i.e.: (... (read in full...)
What should I do when my parents say judgmental, vulgar things?
Q. The differences between me and my parents are unbearable and I find myself avoiding them. My parents are in their early 70s and I am 42. I was divorced nearly 3 years ago and have not found a new partner yet but am taking my time to meet a good ...
A. 12 January 2015: Based on what you've told us about your parents, the things they say and do, and your feelings about what they say and do....I believe that you must choose from among three options:
1. Stay away from them, so that you never are exposed to their... (read in full...)
What should I do as I can't stop thinking about my love affair !
Q. Hi, this probably a really silly situation but I really don't know what to do.... So I've liked this guy for around 4 years every time I used to see him out when I had a drink I used to say things to him I.e I like you, I fancy you etc but things ...
A. 11 January 2015: Ellie: You're not 11 years old any more.... and life is not school yard goings-on as you and your "boyfriends" are out at recess....
Please decide that you really ARE "26-29" years old, and try to look at your life - and this predicament - as an ... (read in full...)
Torn between taking him back, and questioning whether anything's going to change
Q. Hello aunts and uncles. I am looking for some advice please because I'm so confused at the moment. Basically, I had been with my now ex boyfriend for over 5 years. We have always had our own lives and interests outside of the relationship, bu...
A. 10 January 2015: Just to expand a little..... WHY do you girls put up with (AND, put out for) these guys who enjoy you for sexual escapades... but who say to you.... "Oh, yes, I really like you ... and want to continue to see you (read: "enjoy having $ex with ... (read in full...)
Torn between taking him back, and questioning whether anything's going to change
Q. Hello aunts and uncles. I am looking for some advice please because I'm so confused at the moment. Basically, I had been with my now ex boyfriend for over 5 years. We have always had our own lives and interests outside of the relationship, bu...
A. 10 January 2015: If he sez he'll be ready for marriage "... in 10-15 years"
AND if your schedule is such that you'd like to have a marriage much sooner than that....
Then tell him: "Hunchy Bunchy, if you want to be married to me, sometime, then contact me ... (read in full...)
When I asked him if he loved me, he replied with "I'd rather not comment." Does he love me or not? How do I know?
Q. So there is this guy who I love deeply (or maybe its infatuation for a whole year). I think he has feelings for me although sometimes am not so sure. Last night while we were chatting, I told him that I loved him and he said "That ain't no secret" ...
A. 9 January 2015: I'm with Tisha and Euphoric. IF you have a partner who YOU love.... and to whom you say so.... AND you have reason to believe that they love you.... AND they don't (say so).... they are sending you a strong message...
I stayed with a woman fo... (read in full...)
My husband is deleting texts from his ex-wife. How can I handle this?
Q. My husband deletes texts and calls from his ex wife, even after we've had discussions about doing this, and he said he wouldn't do it anymore. Also, I've seen texts where she sends him x's and o's. At one point I even texted her myself to ask her ...
A. 7 January 2015: Call his ex-wife and challenge her to an "eye-scratching-out" contest....... The winner gets to keep this cad....... (read in full...)
What steps can I take to help me move on?
Q. Hi everyone thanks for reading or even just glancing at this . I am hurting so much at minute I have just found out that my ex bf who I still have feeling for is having a baby with his new gf. Is there any steps that will help me forget and move...
A. 7 January 2015: Get a copy of Tolstoy's "War and Peace".... start reading it... and don't stop until you are done....
IF you finish that..... get Dostoyevski's "Crime and Punishment" and read that - cover, to cover. If/when you complete those two books...... (read in full...)
My boss is verbally abusive, but I really need my job
Q. My boss is verbally abusive towards me during my training/probation period. We had a conversation about me not taking my lunch break, and I wanted to know if I will be paid for it. She stated no, and I asked her if I could leave early to compensate ...
A. 7 January 2015: Great boss you describe there....
IF'n she "tells" you that you can't take a lunch break... THEN she is BREAKING THE LAW!!!!!!
Endure as you are able.... but be prepared to point out to her that expectations of YOU not having a civilized work-p... (read in full...)
How do I stop thinking about this cute guy, and move on?
Q. I met a cute guy in the previous semester in one of my exercise classes. I didn't realize i liked him until the very last day of class, which was horrible timing, since i wont see him again. He's a different major, we're both graduating i...
A. 7 January 2015: I suggest you get an armload of Janet Evanovich novels... or Danielle Steele novels.... and keep reading (them) until thoughts of the cute guy are no longer there, in your cranium.....
Good luck...... (read in full...)
Is she being unfair? I don't want to be selfish. But is it wrong that she now wants to have a girl's weekend and squash our previously arranged vacation?
Q. i've had some major plans to do something significant with my girlfriend for quite a few months now. we were planning to go on a mini-vacation together over the weekend, go visit some places, etc. sort of a couples weekend. we made these plans...
A. 7 January 2015: Here's my suggestion of how to approach this:
1. The W/E that you and she had planned... could you do it another weekend? Is it something that is always available? .... say, like going to Disney World, or Colonial Williamsburg? If "yes," t... (read in full...)
She picks and finds fault with everything I do. What should I do?
Q. Recently got engaged to my partner and we have been living together for the past 6 months. Over the course of living together I have found she is a real knit picker and i'm feeling like anything I do is never good enough, even when I do what I c...
A. 7 January 2015: Been there; done that. It took 6 years for me to figure out that I was living in misery THAT I ALLOWED TO HAPPEN!!
Do yourself a favor.... ask her - straight up - is THIS (her behaviour) what I should expect for the duration of a life and marr... (read in full...)
My married boyfriend of two years is torn. He cannot give me up but he cannot leave his marriage. How do I handle this?
Q. I have deep feelings for a man who has been married for 20 years. I have been with him for almost 2 years. It happened because I suppose we met at the right place and the right time and we had this undeniable connection... right from the very st...
A. 7 January 2015: In one of your re-submittals you wrote: "....It is just so hard."
No, it's not. You know what's hard? Recall, a year or so ago there was a man who was repairing his oil burner, and it tipped over, trapping his arm? He couldn't lift the burn... (read in full...)
My married boyfriend of two years is torn. He cannot give me up but he cannot leave his marriage. How do I handle this?
Q. I have deep feelings for a man who has been married for 20 years. I have been with him for almost 2 years. It happened because I suppose we met at the right place and the right time and we had this undeniable connection... right from the very st...
A. 6 January 2015: When you wrote this: "Clearly there must have been a disconnect between him and his wife for him to seek out a relationship with me outside his marriage. I am not so sure he could really love her if he is involved with me this way and for so long. ... (read in full...)
| *ageoldguy1465's friends
These are mutual friends, so *ageoldguy1465 has
added them and they have added *ageoldguy1465!
|
